Soul of the Wildcat

by Devyn Quinn

  Having a squeamish stomach wouldn’t do when it came to living in the mountains. A person had to be tough, rawboned, able to take the materials at hand and fashion them into the necessary tools for survival. Killing and preparing an animal for eating played a big part of daily survival.

  Dakoda wasn’t sure she could do that at all.

  The fantasies she’d spun around joining the Tlvdatsi way of life suddenly seemed less enticing when put into such a perspective. Though she wasn’t a sissy when it came to roughing it, she still remained a city girl at heart. She couldn’t begin to imagine her life without modern plumbing and a grocery store down the street. Living on the edge day after day would begin to wear on her nerves.

  Thank God she hadn’t put her foot in her mouth with regards to Jesse. The door was always open, an easy out if she needed it. Surely he’d understand why their two ways of life didn’t mesh…

  Her brow wrinkled. There you go again, she silently chastised herself. Running every possible scenario straight into the ground. Nothing had happened yet, no solid decisions needed to be made just this second. When they did, she’d deal with them. Until then, she needed to stop driving herself crazy with what if…

  “Just deal with what now,” she muttered.

  Finding a tree with a few good thick branches, she began to break them off and strip off the bark. Green and flexible, the long strips of bark would make good ties. Working with her hands gave her time to think, something she seemed to be doing too much of already.

  I’m not sure I could stay here with Jesse.

  Her idea about considering things another time was beginning to look like a good piece of advice. No reason to say or do anything that would put either of them in an awkward position. After all, she had a career to pursue. And she’d gotten along fine without a man in her life for quite a while. Once things returned to normal it was entirely possible she and Jesse wouldn’t have a thing in common. Lust wasn’t enough to build a relationship on. The sex would eventually wear thin.

  Then what? Another messy breakup?

  No thanks, her mind filled in.

  Finished with the branches, she carried them back over to camp. She crouched beside him, bringing her into disturbingly close proximity with his half-naked body. Close enough for her to lean forward and plant her lips on his if she wanted to. The memory of their sultry nights of lovemaking swirled through her skull with hurricane force.

  She cleared her throat. “Will these do?” she asked, trying to act like anything but sex was on her mind. Every damn time she got close to him, all she wanted to do was drag him down and have sex with him. The man’s magnetism was like an invading disease, giving her a dizzy head, swimmy stomach, and trembling legs.

  Yeah, he definitely had something potent going on there.

  Jesse nodded. “Perfect.” Having prepared and cleaned the rabbit, he set to fashioning a spit and propping it over the fire to test its distance from the flames. Making a few adjustments, he pronounced himself satisfied. “This ought to do just fine.” Impaling the rabbit through and through, he set it over the pit to cook.

  The flames licked hungrily at the rabbit’s raw flesh, causing the meat to sizzle like ham in a frying pan. The delicious scent of roasting meat began to fill the air.

  Dakoda leaned close and took a deep breath. “That smells like heaven.” The aroma of the meat seasoned by the wood brought to mind images of barbeque and tall glasses of ice-cold freshly brewed tea, two of her favorite things in summer. Saliva rose in her mouth even as her stomach rumbled with impatience. If she’d known the rabbit was going to smell this damn good, she’d have gutted it herself. The idea of country living was a little more appealing when a solid meal was in sight.

  He grinned. “Glad you think so. By the look on your face a while ago, you’d have thought I was skinning a rattlesnake to eat.”

  Dakoda froze. A residual shiver of terror over the timber rattler incident shimmied down her spine. “You would eat a snake?”

  His grin widened. “Of course. I have several times. They’re quite tasty, if a little bit fatty.”

  She frowned. “I suppose you’re going to tell me it tastes like chicken.”

  “Actually it does.” Using the tip of a stick, Jesse turned the carcass so the other side would roast evenly. “You ever eat rabbit?”

  Images of sweet little fat bunnies swept across her mind’s screen. She quickly shook her head. Wild rabbits were quite different from pet-store rabbits. They were meant to be hunted, eaten. “No, I can’t say that I have,” she said slowly. “It’s not on the menu of the places I usually dine.”

  “No French restaurants for you, huh?”

  Tension uncoiling a bit, Dakoda had to laugh. “I don’t get into places like that very often. In fact, never. My idea of dining out is grabbing a pizza or a burger and fries from the drive-through.”

  Jesse rolled his eyes. “Oh, God, don’t mention pizza. I haven’t had a slice in years. Man, I wish one would fall out of the sky right about now.”

  She rolled her eyes at the ridiculousness of the request. “While you’re at it, wish for a pitcher of dark German beer to go with it.”

  Jesse picked at the mushrooms and carrots she’d laid out on the flat stone. “Guess these will have to do,” he said, munching a carrot. He chewed thoughtfully, then swallowed. “Would be nice if we had some dip. Ranch would be good.”

  She considered his comment. “Do you miss living in a more hospitable world?”

  Lifting the cooked meat off the fire, Jesse smiled ruefully. “Honestly? Every damn day, sometimes twice a day,” he said, carving the meat into smaller pieces to cool. “I mean, it wasn’t like I was born in these mountains. Sure, this is the land of my ancestors and I’ve got some crazy bloodline that lets me turn into a cougar, but do I really belong here?” He shook his head. “Shit, it’s a question I’ve asked myself over and over.”

  “You mean, to shift or not to shift?” she asked.

  Jesse smiled ruefully. “Yeah, something like that.”

  Without quite knowing what prompted her, Dakoda decided to do a little subtle digging. “You ever think of leaving?”

  “You mean go home, back to a real life instead of spending my days running around on four paws?”

  She nodded.

  He looked at her a long time, his mental wheels clearly turning. “I would go back in a heartbeat—if I had never learned to shift. But now that I have and now that I know what I really am in this world…” He shrugged, looking around at the rugged landscape surrounding them. “How could I ever leave? I mean, you don’t see a lot of cougars trotting on the asphalt.” His hand touched the ground, palm flat against the earth. Their gazes locked candidly for a moment. “Like it or not, this is where I belong.”

  “Oh, that makes sense.” Dakoda’s throat involuntarily tightened, barely allowing the words to escape.

  Her brain betrayed her, circling back around to the exact subject she’d promised herself she wouldn’t think about. She’d entertained the notion of luring him away from the mountains, but his words blew the idea right out of the water. He spoke bluntly and honestly. The implications behind his last statement clearly affirmed any woman he would be interested in would have to be one willing to join his beyond-the-ordinary lifestyle.

  Her heart thudded dully in against her rib cage. At least I know where things stand.

  Living in the mountains with a cougar? It was too damn far-fetched to even think about. Once this misadventure had come to its end, the best thing to do would be say good-bye, then move on. The human world and the feline world just wouldn’t come together in her mind.

  A feeling of dismay tied her guts into knots. This was not good. Not good at all. The logistics of their entire situation were getting too problematic, and she hated complicated.

  Stop that! she warned herself sharply. That’s what she wanted to do right now. Stop thinking. Stop breathing. Stop being. The world needed to grind to a halt so she could get of
f and take a break. Otherwise she’d soon be picking her nose and drooling, a dim-witted lump of nothing useful.

  Lifting her hand, Dakoda pressed her palm flat against her forehead. This entire stupid mess was beginning to give her a massive headache. A dull thud beat at her temples. “Excuse me while I have a small nervous breakdown.” The statement had nothing to do with anything they’d been discussing. Or did it? She wasn’t sure any more.

  Brow furrowing with concern, Jesse cleared his throat. “Are you okay?” A strong warm hand settled on her arm. His essence flowed over her, permeating her skin until she felt him in her blood, all the way to her bones.

  The chemistry between them was undeniable. Just looking at him bought a distinctive sexual edge into play. Carnal energy practically snapped in the air between them.

  Oh, man. He was so big. And so damn strong.

  Dakoda jumped violently at his touch. Her insides contracted hard. She panted. Heat began creeping into her cheeks. Desire shuddered though her all over again. Her hormones were all over the place. Maybe it wasn’t a pregnancy she’d better worry about, but a monthly. There was no telling how out of whack her cycle was from all the nervous tension.

  Shaking off his hand with feigned nonchalance, she snorted inelegantly. “I’m fine.” Her eyes abruptly filled with tears, swimming with misery, fatigue, hunger, and just plain frustration. “I’ll feel better when I get some food in me.”

  Jesse looked at her closely, but made no comment about her uncharacteristic lapse into tears. His gaze briefly dropped to her mouth as if he were contemplating kissing her, but then darted away, leaving the impulse unfulfilled. “Right. That makes sense.” He picked up a slice of meat and held it out for her. “I think it’s cool enough.”

  Dakoda accepted the meat, pinching it between thumb and forefinger. She gave it a quick sniff. “Smells good.” Her experimental nibble turned into a mighty mouthful. Finding the meat more than palatable, she shoved the entire piece into her mouth. Closing her eyes, she chewed, savoring every tender bite.

  Jesse watched her closely. “Good?”

  She swallowed. “Oh, God, yes. It’s delicious.”

  He handed over more meat. “Eat up.”

  Dakoda set to stuffing her mouth with the delicious hot food. “Thanks. I feel like a glutton.”

  Jesse chewed a mouthful of his own food. “It does taste good after those terrible meal bars.”

  “Wouldn’t want a steady diet of those things,” she said between bites. Finished with the meat, she swallowed a few more mushrooms to top off her meal. She patted her stomach. “That’s the first time I’ve felt alive in days.”

  Jesse grinned. “Good. Then it was worth the effort.” He yawned and stretched. “And now what every great hunter needs after a hard hunt and nice meal is a nice long nap in the sun.” He eyed the grassy bank of the river. “I think I’m going to take a few minutes and sun myself.”

  Dakoda laughed. “I suppose you’re going to leave me to clean up the mess.” She frowned and shook a finger in mock disapproval. “Typical male.”

  Jesse laughed. “Why don’t you join me? Stretch out a few minutes and just rest in the sun.”

  The idea of lying down beside him pushed her body into the feverish range. It wasn’t a bad idea at all. Just an impractical one at the moment. As she’d worked, she’d caught a whiff of her own odor and the scent was, frankly, offensive. There was no way she’d be cuddling up with him until she’d had a good wash. Her skin literally felt alive with creepy crawlies.

  She shook her head. “First I need a good head-to-toe wash.”

  He brightened, raising a brow. “Oh. Can I watch?”

  Walking over to the edge of the stream, Dakoda sat down to take off her boots and socks. “If you must,” she said, giving him a grin. The attraction between them flared, making her head spin.

  Gaze raking her with salacious wickedness, Jesse grinned appreciatively. “Oh, I must,” he echoed with a laugh. “Absolutely.”

  Dakoda laughed. “You flatter me.” She felt the dampness between her thighs at the thought of his cock sinking into her hungry sex.

  She eyed his lanky frame. Oh, yes. That would be perfect.

  After all, Jesse wasn’t the only one with a hankering for dessert.

  Though she hadn’t believed the day could get any better, she was about to find out just how good it was going to be.

  20

  Standing up, Dakoda quickly stripped down to bra and panties, spreading her clothes out on the clean grass to air. Washing would be impractical at this point. They’d have to be thrown away as soon as she could replace them.

  Jesse drank in the sight of her like a thirsting man. “Can I have sex with you if I flatter you some more?” he asked.

  She stepped forward, kneeling to put an experimental hand in the water. Though the day was warm, the water flowing down from the mountains was icy cold. She shivered. “Brrr. Going to make for one hell of a cold bath,” she said, trying to keep her teeth from chattering.

  Stripping out of his jeans, Jesse stretched out on the warm grass. Rolling onto his stomach, he folded his hands under his chin. The curve of his shoulders and back made a nice path to the curves of his apple-firm ass. “The water’s cold year-round,” he informed her.

  Dakoda couldn’t help remembering how he’d looked when he’d stepped out of the water. With his rippling muscles, ridged abdomen, and lean hips he was pretty much what she’d imagine male perfection to be.

  Taking a deep breath, she mentally manned up and plunged straight into the water. Holy shit! The first shock of ice cut right to the bone. She considered dashing right back out.

  Dakoda persevered. Teeth clenched tight, she kept walking until the water was waist deep. The bottom wasn’t jagged, but the rocks were a little slippery. Her nipples were tight little buds beneath her bra.

  Taking a breath, she lowered herself until the water came to her shoulders. It took a few minutes to get used to the temperature, but once she did she barely felt the cold. One palm scrabbled to find a stone with a coarse surface. Finding what she wanted, she ran it lightly over her skin, sloughing away the layers of grime. Since she had no real soap to use, this was the best she could do. Simply wetting the skin would still leave her with a layer of grime once she dried off.

  Finished with her body, Dakoda dunked her head under the water, rinsing out her long hair. When her hair got damp it curled into tight little ringlets, almost impossible to pull a comb through. It was a snarled mess, and she’d probably have to cut it off when they reached civilization again. There would be no way she could salvage the mass of tangles. The best she could do was try to rinse off her hair and tie it back up in a bun.

  Done with her bath, she splashed back toward shore. She flopped down beside Jesse on the warm grass. Rays of direct sunlight warmed her skin. The heat felt great after enduring the icy chill of the stream.

  Jesse lifted himself up on an elbow and looked down at her. “Oh, man, the way that wet bra and panties cling to your skin is about to drive me crazy.”

  Dakoda glanced down. Sure enough, the white cotton had gone transparent, offering about as much cover as plastic wrap. So much for trying to maintain a little decency. She might as well have stripped naked. It wasn’t like Jesse had never seen her in the buff.

  She started to unhook her bra.

  Jesse stopped her. “Let me, please.”

  Gut throbbing with need, Dakoda nodded. Just the thought of his touch caused her body to respond with a surge of red-hot lust.

  Catching one strap, Jesse slowly eased it down her shoulder, peeling the wet cup away from her left breast. The rounded flesh came into view, tipped with a cherry-tinted nipple. He fondled the erect tip gently, causing it to pucker briefly before tightening again.

  Dakoda caught her breath. “One of these days I’m going to turn the tables on you,” she murmured, “and put my lips around your delicious cock.”

  Jesse traced a single finger around the n
ubbin, lightly at first, then with more pressure. “I’m looking forward to it. But first I need to take care of something….” A second later his mouth descended, teeth scraping against her soft areola.

  Dakoda moaned, arching her back against the ground even as Jesse ran the palm of his hand over her smooth belly. He slipped his fingers under the elastic of her panties, probing the soft rise of her mound. Her thighs opened, welcoming his caress.

  Barely able to catch her breath, she gasped. “I want you inside me,” she murmured. She wanted to feel the undulations of his body on top of her, to feel his surging heat stab into her with thrust after brutal thrust. Claiming her.

  Making her his own.

  Jesse raised his head long enough to smile up at her. “It’s coming,” he promised. “I want to make you hotter than hell.” Lips returning to her breast, he slipped his fingers through her damp labia, slowly easing a finger inside her creamy sex. He clearly preferred to be the one giving the pleasure rather than receiving it, a trait of the alpha male.

  That was something she’d like to change.

  Not that she had a chance at the moment. Not with Jesse’s tongue stroking her nipple and his hand making all kinds of arousing moves below her panty line.

  Dakoda’s breath raged past her lips as she felt his first penetration. Adding a second finger to the first, he pumped into her rippling core. Strong inner muscles clenched, holding him tightly. A soft moan rolled up from deep in her throat. “Damn you,” she breathed. “I’m already hot enough.” She spread her legs wider, granting full access.

  Jesse’s fingers slipped away. “Oh, I have to take advantage of this.” Pushing himself off the ground, he repositioned himself on his knees between her spread legs. He hooked her panties and pulled them over her legs.

  Palms tracing along the insides of her thighs, he kept her spread wide. “Oh, this is how I’ve wanted to see you. Out in the light, without a stitch on.”

  “I still have my bra,” Dakoda reminded through a gasp.

  He unsnapped the front hook, pushing the wet material away from her other breast. “Not anymore.” Arched up toward his abdomen, his erection was rock hard.