He was looking at me with a new intensity now, his eyes starting to burn.
“I assure you Mr O'Brien, I don't know your daughter. I didn't even know you had a daughter.”
“DON'T LIE TO ME.” His voice was suddenly loud, bouncing round the walls and shattering the quiet clam in my little poker den. I could see his guards out of the corner of my eye standing at the bottom of the stairs, primed to move if their boss gave them any hint to do so.
“Sir, I'm not lying to you. I've never met your daughter!”
His fist slammed down hard on the table, his poker chips scattering around. The dealer sat back sharply as O'Brien stood, his face fuming. I'd heard of his temper, but never thought I'd experience it first hand.
His voice was seething now, creeping between his clenched teeth. “Then how come you spent the night with her only two days ago? How come she came to this fucking poker den!”
His words shot into me. Was he talking about Amy?! Was her name Amy O'Brien?! Jesus Christ she was his daughter!
A single word crept quietly from my lips: “Amy...”
“Yes Amy! I had a man follow her from here. He saw her go into her hotel....and you went in after her. You didn't come out until the following morning. So, Mr Logan, I ask again, do you know my daughter?” There was a deep menace to his words now. They crackled and burned like a fire in his mouth. The sudden change in him was terrifying. He'd gone from calm and friendly to volcanic in a second.
“Mr O'Brien, I had no idea she was your daughter. I wasn't lying to you sir. She never told me her surname.”
His eyes stayed on me, piercing me. I wanted to look away but didn't, holding my stare on him.
“Are you still lying to me Mr Logan?” he asked slowly, almost provokingly.
I shook my head. “I haven't lied to you sir. I met your daughter at our casino – Logan's – last Friday night. She never told me her name. Then she came here on Monday, she didn't know it was my place. It was all coincidence Mr O'Brien, I promise you I only found out her first name a couple of days ago, and never knew she was your daughter.”
“And when she came here on Monday...” he seemed to struggle with his words, as if they were making him sick, “...you stayed with her in her hotel room. You...slept with her?”
I didn't know what to say. Jesus Christ why did she have to be his daughter, of all people!
I slowly nodded, my eyes sheepish. “Yes sir.”
He seemed to recoil slightly at my words. I mean, seriously, the girl was 21 years old, she could do what she wanted.
“If you see her again, you're a dead man.” The threat rumbled through the room. He was speaking quietly, but every single word struck at me like a boxer's blow. “I don't want her involved with a man like you. I don't want her involved in a world like this.”
I was struck dumb in the room, a silence falling. I wanted to tell him to go fuck himself. I wanted to tell him that he couldn't tell me what to do. I wanted to tell him that he was the biggest fucking hypocrite in the world. A man like me? He was the fucking devil himself!
But I didn't say any of that. It didn't matter that I was a Logan. It didn't matter that Charles Logan had been my father. No one messed with Conor O'Brien. If I said anything back to him right now, I might just end up six feet under by the end of the day.
So no, I kept my mouth shut and just looked at him. He was the guy who made the rules. Everyone else just played by them. And if you didn't? Well, you might not live to regret it.
“I'm glad we had this chat Jude,” he said after a brief lull, his expression returning suddenly to normal. “Keep the change.”
Then he turned suddenly, leaving his $20,000 at the table, and paced towards the stairs. He marched up without looking back, his two guards following behind, and walked briskly out into the sunlight.
….
Amy
I approached the restaurant. It was just off the South corner of Adam's Park, tucked away down a quiet side street off the main road.
I could see a man standing outside the door. He wore a black suit and sunglasses, watching the street like a hawk. Thursday afternoon at a quiet restaurant didn't usually call for a bouncer outside of the door. But I knew exactly why the guy was there.
His gaze followed me as I walked down the road.
“Good afternoon miss O'Brien,” he said as I got closer. I recognized him as the same guy who'd been at my father's side when I went to the house on Monday.
“Your father is waiting inside,” he said.
I walked past him and in through the door. It was an Italian restaurant, but empty inside. I saw another guard sitting at the bar, a glass of iced water in front of him. He gestured to the corner of the room, where my father sat in silence.
As he saw me he stood up and walked forward. I met him in the middle of the room and he hugged me and kissed my cheeks.
“I'm so glad you called Amy. We didn't have a chance to talk properly on Monday.”
He smiled, his face lighting up, before turning and pulling out a seat for me at the table.
“Why is there no one else here,” I asked as I sat down.
“Oh, I own the restaurant. I shut it for the afternoon.”
I suppose he wanted to talk in private, probably away from the house. It made sense, but still, there was something completely paranoid about him. The guard outside, a second guard at the bar. He had his car waiting out the front as well, a driver probably waiting to speed off at the first sign of trouble. It was all evidence of a life I hated.
“I wanted to apologize Amy, for the other day. I know there are issues between us, but all I want is my little girl back. I'll do anything to have you back in my life. I...I know I haven't been the greatest father, but I want to make that up to you. You're the most important thing in the world to me.”
His words were completely unexpected. He'd never, ever, spoken to me in that way.
“That's what I want too dad. I came back here to put the past behind us. But...” I paused briefly, “...it's not as easy as that.”
“I know, I know. It won't be easy, but I'd like to try honey. You're my little girl, and I love you.”
The guard from the bar walked over suddenly, interrupting us with a couple of drinks. He placed a glass of whiskey down in front of my father, and what appeared to be a hot chocolate in front of me.
“You do realize I'm 21 years old, don't you dad?” I asked. I said it with a mixture of jest and annoyance.
He smiled awkwardly. “Yes Amy...?”
I picked up the hot chocolate and widened my eyes. “I can drink now, you know. I'm not a little girl any more.”
“Oh, of course, stupid me. Um, Trevor, would you get Amy a....what would you like darling?”
“I'll have a Chardonnay please. Large.”
Trevor returned to the bar and brought me back a large glass of wine, setting it down in front of me.
“I do forget how you've grown up now,” he said. “I suppose it's because I haven't seen you in three years.” He spoke placidly. I knew there was a simmering anger inside him about the entire thing, but he wasn't going to bring that up again, not right now.
“Well, yes dad, I drink now. If I'd gone to college like you wanted, I'd be drinking a lot more, I can assure you.”
He stayed quiet at my remark. It was another area of disagreement between us.
“Look honey, I know you don't agree with what I do, and I know you still blame me for your mother's death. Believe me, I blame myself.” His voice went suddenly introverted as he spoke of my mother, memories flooding back. “But surely there's a way we can work past that. Surely we can still have some sort of relationship?”
He was saying all the right things. It was exactly what I wanted to hear from him. “And you're happy to accept that I play poker for a living?”
He forced a smile. “If it makes you happy. You know I'd rather you did something else Amy, but you're a grown woman and you can live the life you want. I'd just rather
you didn't play at seedy poker dens and clubs. Can you not stick with proper, regulated casinos?”
He had this earnest look in his eye. I nodded and sipped my wine. I knew that I wouldn't do that, but he didn't have to know. Any time I went to a poker den I did my homework beforehand. I knew that they'd be safe, and I loved the thrill of it all. What did he really know about it? He just saw it as a dangerous world for his daughter, who he wanted to protect. I understood that, but I wouldn't stop. This was my life, my world, not his.
“So you'll stay?” he asked tentatively. I'd never seen him this, I don't know, vulnerable.
“I can't say that dad. I travel, it's what I do. But, I won't stay away. I'll come back more often.”
“And will you stay at the house when you do?”
I shook my head. “I can't stay there, no.” It was too difficult, it had too many bad memories for me.
“I understand. I'll buy you an apartment – somewhere in the center of the city. You can use it as a base when you come and visit.” There was an excitement in his voice now. It was quite touching. He really did seem to want me back, to build a new relationship.
“You don't have to do that dad. I can stay at hotels, I'm used to that.”
“No, no, I want to. You're going to need your own place if you come back here often.”
“I can't say how often that will be dad. I can't be sure of anything right now.”
“Well, no matter. It'll be a good real estate investment anyway. I'd also like to discuss security.” His voice was turning more formal. The businessman was coming to the fore.
“Security?”
“Well, honey, you might be a target. I need to know you're safe. Now, what I need you to do is to tell me when you're coming into town, and I can assign you a bodyguard. I'll make sure your apartment is properly secure and have men protecting you all the time. All I need from you is....”
“Dad,” I cut in, “stop. Stop this.”
His mouth shut suddenly and he looked at me in slight shock.
“This is exactly what I ran away from dad, don't you understand. I don't want to be under the microscope like that. I don't want to be part of your world. I don't want you taking control like this.”
The thought of having a bodyguard at my side turned my stomach. Having my dad knowing my every move, admitting that I was associated with everything he did, all the pain he caused. I wouldn't be able to bare that. I wanted nothing to do with it.
“But honey, I need to know you're safe.”
I shook my head. “This is fucking ridiculous.” I couldn't help myself from swearing in front of him. I never had before. “What other daughter needs a bodyguard because of their father's job!”
“Politicians daughters, powerful businessmen....”
“Yeah, but that's different!”
“How is it different? I'm a businessman Amy, and I have enemies. It's a symptom of my success.”
“But you're not just a businessman! You're a mobster! I'm under threat because you're a crime boss, not because you're a businessman!”
He held his hands up. “Calm down Amy, we'll forget the security, OK. I shouldn't have brought it up, I'm sorry.”
I looked away. I couldn't lock eyes with him right now.
“Please Amy. Let's go back a step. No security, OK. I'm just overprotective. It's just me, something I have to deal with. I'm being paranoid, you won't need any protection.”
I nodded. “Paranoid, yeah! I mean, the house is swarming with guards. You've got the guy outside right now, the guy at the bar, the getaway car with the engine running. I mean, how can we build a relationship if this is your life?”
His eyes were sinking now, looking down at his whiskey. He looked deflated, almost beaten. No one spoke to him like this, but he knew he couldn't talk back to me. If he did, I'd leave and might never come back. He had to hear it, hear his life ripped to shreds by his own daughter. But he needed to hear it, he had to know how I felt.
“Tell me Amy, tell me what you want. You came back to fix things. Tell me how to fix this.” His eyes stayed low, his voice almost a whisper.
I didn't have an answer. Even seeing his security men brought everything back to me. How could we ever move forward if everything about him reminded me of the past?
“I don't know dad. It's hard, knowing what you do, knowing how mom died. I want to move on, I really do. I just don't know how we can.”
He reached for my hand across the table, a rare piece of affection, and stared me straight in the eyes. “I'd do anything Amy, to have my daughter back. Please, just try. Let me try to make things right.”
He was doing everything he could to patch things up, everything he could to bring me back. I couldn't say no to him. I had to try, I had to try to put everything out of my mind.
“OK daddy, I'll try.”
Chapter 9
Jude
I walked through the main doors of the casino and through the main floor. I couldn't help but glance around for Amy as I did.
Amy O'Brien.
I still couldn't get my head around who she really was.
If you see her again, you're a dead man.
Her dad's words were still ringing in my ears. I'd never been threatened like that. Never. Not from anyone who would go through with it anyway. You might have someone shout 'I'm gonna kill you' in a fight, but that wasn't the same thing.
When Conor O'Brien threatens you, however, it's as real as things get, backed by years, decades, of threatening people and following through. Well, that's if anyone dared to go against what he told them. I doubt that many people did. The threat was usually enough.
I carried on past flashing slot machines and up towards the staircase leading to the gallery floor above. At the top was a mirrored wall with a door within it. I knew that from inside Crash could see me coming forward, sitting there behind the desk and looking out over the casino.
It was Sunday now and I had come to meet up with Crash to fill him in on the week. I met him every week, usually on a Sunday, to catch up and keep him in the loop. As the head of the family he was very hands on, and certainly paid more direct attention to everything than dad ever did.
Although, our meetings were necessarily short these days, and his watch over me, as well as the others, had waned. It was all down to his grander ambitions and the new casino and hotel he was building. He'd fought hard to secure the investment to get his project up and running, and now it was occupying the majority of his attention.
I knocked on the door and heard his voice from within. He was sat calmly behind the desk, frowning as he went through some files in front of him. I glanced round the room to see that Kyle wasn't there. Crash used to run the casino here, but now he'd passed that on to Kyle. I knew, however, that Kyle was always a bit annoyed when Crash wandered back in and took control of his office for meetings.
“Jude,” he said, his voice deep and slightly croaky, “come on in.”
I walked forward and sat down in the chair opposite him. He lifted a bottle of whiskey from his side and sent a full glass towards me.
“So tell me, what's been happening at the bar this week? Anything to note?”
“Nothing major Crash, no. There was a mix up with a delivery earlier in the week, but I sorted it.”
“Good. Any fights, anything like that?”
I shook my head. “Nope, all very quiet.”
“Good.”
He tilted his head up from his files and peered at me. The guy was always intense so it was nothing new. But I always had a lingering fear that he'd found out about my poker club. Honestly, if he did, I had no idea how he'd react. Most likely he'd tell me to shut it down, and for me, that would be a disaster. I loved that place. If I lost it, I'd be bored out of my fucking mind just running the bar again.
“Anything else to report?” Crash asked, still looking at me doubtfully.
“No, not really.”
He nodded lightly for a moment as he continued to look at me. C
ould he sense I was hiding something?
“OK,” he said, turning his eyes back down to his files, “keep up the good work Jude. I've been impressed with how you're doing.”
“Really?” I said, fairly surprised to hear the compliment. I didn't think I'd done anything of note recently.
“Yeah,” he said, somewhat absentmindedly, his eyes still down. “You're growing into a good manager of people, Jude. I'm looking forward to bringing you over to the new casino when it's finally finished.
“The new casino? What sort of role?” I knew that Crash wanted us all to join together as a family and run the casino and hotel together, but never in what capacity for myself.
“That's to be determined. I know you love the casino here Jude, and I know you wanted the job ahead of Kyle to manage it. Obviously, you understand you were too young, but you're really proving yourself capable. Just continue to work well, and we'll see.”
“Thanks Crash, that means a lot to me.”
He lifted his eyes to me again and smiled. “No problem. You've always been the most loyal brother to me Jude. I know you'll have a big future.”
His words were making me beam inside but, at the same time, I could feel my gut wrenching. He was saying all this, thinking I'm being loyal to him, and I'm out there running an illegal poker club under his nose. I was betraying him, there was no other way of looking at it.
“Is there anything else you want to talk about?” he asked, seeing the frown grow on my face. “Is there something on your mind?” Crash was always very perceptive.
“No, it's all fine. Nothing special going on.”
He kept looking at me for a moment, giving me a chance to come clean, before eventually speaking again. “OK then, if that's all Jude, I've got a lot on.”
He quickly gestured to the door with his eyes before turning again to his work.
“Actually Crash, there was one more thing.”
His eyes slowly raised back up to mine.
“I don't know if you know anything about it, but I thought I'd ask anyway.”
His eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Yes?”
The Logan Brothers - Books 1-4: (EXPOSURE, CRASH, TWIN PASSIONS, and ADDICTED TO YOU) Page 60