“Everyone, circle up,” Grant said.
Brenden caught Vaughn’s eye and shook his head.
Yeah, this was a disaster.
He turned back toward the table. The only open seat was next to Carla.
Great.
He cleared his throat and sat while Grant ran through the details of their failed op. Ashton spoke out less and less. From where Vaughn sat, he saw Carla prod the other man in the thigh or even kick him a few times.
The facts were this did not reflect well on their team or the job they were hired to do. Vaughn hadn’t liked going out in the middle of the day to a residential area to lie in wait. It was risky, and they’d fallen victim to not having adequate vantage points. The locals and the lay of the land had been their downfall, but those things happened when they were in a densely populated area.
“What’s your solution? How are you going to wrap this up?” Ashton asked when Grant was done.
“Like I said, I want to bring in a couple guys from Troy Team as back up. With more muscle I think we’ll get the drop on these people. It’s not a sophisticated operation.”
“Are we going to acknowledge that the locals were obviously against us?” Vaughn glanced around the table. “I think we need to hear Carla out again. Our kidnapper is an average Joe kind of guy. He’s not a criminal mastermind or a terrorist or anything like that. More manpower might just get more people hurt.”
Vaughn glanced at Nolan then Brenden. Both men studied the glass surface of the table.
“More men will get this job done faster and safer,” Grant said.
“Are we sure?” Vaughn leaned his elbows on the table.
The others kept quiet.
They’d been attacked by grandmas with brooms today. Nolan had gotten wound up in a clothesline. It all felt pretty odd to Vaughn.
“Carla?” He turned toward her. “Do you still think this isn’t about the money?”
“It’s a possibility. But what do I know?” She shrugged and didn’t look at him. “I’m not the professional.”
Vaughn frowned and stared at the side of her head.
She’d practically cornered him, spouting her theory before. Why had she changed?
“I’ll run this all up the line, but I’m pushing for more manpower. Nolan, Brenden, I want to send you two out tonight to scout the area. Our guy’s out there. It’s a matter of who finds him first.”
“What if the kidnapper calls back? What then?” Ashton asked.
Melody leaned forward. “You’ll talk to him. The most important thing right now is to get him talking again. Open up lines of communication. If we have that, we can either negotiate or track him. He’s not sophisticated enough to block us from using our tools to find him.”
Ashton sat back. He looked like a man who’d had the wind knocked out of his sails. “What should we do?”
“Right now? Get some rest. We’ll have dinner brought up soon.” Grant gestured at Vaughn’s end of the table. “We’re going to iron out shifts, who is doing what, and ensure this location is secure.”
“Meaning you don’t need us.” Carla pushed her chair back and picked up a laptop from off the table. “Ash, I have a few things I need to ask you about.”
“Now?” Ashton frowned at her.
“Yes, people back in New York think you’re still, you know, in New York.” She nodded at the stairs. “Come on.”
Vaughn frowned.
There was something off about this, but what? Was Carla up to something?
Grant launched into the typical ops stuff, when meals were expected, who pulled what shift, threat assessment. Vaughn knew to expect overnight duty. It would be him and the laptop for hours tonight. He could mull over what Carla might be up to then. For now, he had to do his job.
VAUGHN SAT ON the terrace, the evening breeze bordering on the edge of chilly. Darkness had long since descended on the city. The city noise from below was even quieter at this hour. Being this far above the ground with an uninterrupted view of the water, it was like being on an island.
He could go for that right about now.
Today was a cluster fuck and the more he thought about it the more frustrated he got.
Who’d blown cover first?
Him.
Their additional manpower should arrive first thing in the morning. That really rubbed him the wrong way. It was like Grant didn’t have faith that they could pull this job off or something. Deep down Vaughn knew it was more about needing to keep their assets protected. A couple months back they’d had assets kidnapped out from under them during a job because they’d split manpower. Twice. Vaughn’s rational mind knew this was Grant overcompensating. He’d been different since that job. No one wanted to lose a high profile person like Ashton in a country out for his blood. But Gant was going about this all wrong.
Of course, additional men also meant additional problems. Like, where the hell were three more guys going to bunk down at? They were already sleeping two to a bed. In an odd turn, Carla had given up her room so Melody wasn’t on the sofa.
That wasn’t Vaughn’s problem, and he honestly didn’t want to think too hard about where everyone was sleeping. Particularly Carla.
What had he been thinking?
He scrubbed his hand over his face and watched the lobby security guy turn pages of a magazine. The man was too well-dressed to be a rent-a-cop. Vaughn was willing to bet the guy probably owned the place or something and did night work to pinch pennies. Or maybe he was wrong? Wouldn’t be the first time.
Vaughn had been wrong on the plane, and now he had a heaping dose of jealousy for a woman he had no right to. No amount of reminding himself it wasn’t his business could stem the green-eyed monster writhing inside of him. It was this growing thing he couldn’t get the better of. And knowing Ashton was gay, that he didn’t want anything from Carla, didn’t make it better.
What the hell was wrong with him?
Vaughn didn’t get bent out of shape over women. He had rules. But one look at Carla and he wasn’t the same person. The rules didn’t matter. And here he was obsessing and thinking about her when he knew very well this was a shit show with no good ending for either of them.
He wasn’t the kind of guy who got jealous. He’d figured out fairly young that either a woman wanted to be with him or they didn’t. It wasn’t worth his time to chase a woman who wasn’t interested. Doing what he did—first as a SEAL now part of Lepta Team—was tough under good circumstances. He couldn’t do complicated.
So why was he incapable of mentally letting go of Carla?
He’d said all the right things to her. He’d been upfront with her. But none of that mattered to his insides.
Was it because she was forbidden fruit? Wanting her didn’t matter. She’d never be available in the way he needed her to be. She would always be Ashton’s pseudo-girlfriend.
Vaughn didn’t share. He couldn’t see a way for this to work, and that was only part of the problem. She’d never offered him more than sex and pleasure. His mind kept making the leap to wanting more. It was a switch he couldn’t turn off. When it came to Carla, he wanted more.
And the cycle began again.
What was it about her? Why this woman when he didn’t do complicated? And why did he keep thinking there was more to it?
A bedroom door opened in the condo. He couldn’t quite tell which one out here so he turned and watched for movement.
Despite the swaddling of night, the moonlight illuminated the main area of the condo nicely, thanks to all that polished marble.
A familiar, curvy figure stepped out onto the staircase.
He swallowed and already he could feel his resolve slipping. When she was around, he lost his head. The only thing that mattered was getting closer to her.
Carla descended the stairs, hardly making a sound. She had a robe belted over her clothes. What was she wearing under there? And why should he ask that question?
Vaughn squeezed his eyes shut. He shouldn’t w
onder. And yet his mind was supplying all sorts of images ranging from nothing at all to tantalizing scraps of lace. Yeah, he had it bad for a woman he couldn’t have and he’d been around her for a grand total of—what? Two days?
“Vaughn?”
He opened his eyes.
Carla stood in the open doorway, hands braced on the metal frame. The breeze made the silken robe ripple. Tendrils of her hair floated away from her face. The moonlight made her skin a creamy shade that had him thinking about lattes and what she’d taste like.
“What are you doing awake?” She padded out onto the patio.
“Someone has to do the over-night shift.” He gestured to the laptop screen. At least she’d asked a question he could answer.
“All night?” She sat in the empty seat to his right, tugging the hem of the robe lower to it almost went to her knees.
“Yup.”
“You think that’s necessary?” Her nose wrinkled.
“I do.”
“Oh.” She blinked a few times.
He needed to take control of this chat. Keep it focused on why they were there. Maybe then he’d escape this conversation without doing something stupid. Like bending her over or boosting her up against all that glass. “It’s a precaution. Ashton is, in theory, a high value target in this country. We aren’t going to let anything happen to him or you on our watch.”
One side of her mouth quirked up. “Have you ever been attacked in the dead of night?”
“Yes.”
Her eyes went wide. “Oh. I thought...”
“We won’t let anything happen to you.” This wasn’t so bad. It was work talk. He could do this.
She nodded and glanced away.
Her easy smile was gone. The vibe coming off her was decidedly strained.
Vaughn wanted her to be at ease. He wanted to hold her, to assure her that her fears were baseless, that he’d do everything to make her happy. But that wasn’t his place. It couldn’t be.
He scrubbed his jaw then pressed his fingers over his lips to keep from asking her what was wrong why she was awake or any other prying question.
Carla turned her attention toward him, her eyes pinning him to the spot. He felt a wave of awareness and the urge to scoop her up intensified as though he were born to care for her.
“I guess while we’re alone...” She cleared her throat. “I’m sorry about earlier.”
He clenched his jaw shut.
Down this path lay danger, but he couldn’t ignore her. He’d tried all evening.
“Nothing to be sorry about.” He shrugged. “If anyone’s fucked up, it’s me. I...”
“It’s a complicated situation. I’m not upset or pointing fingers. I’m just...sorry.”
“Yeah. Me, too.” He leaned back and looked his fill at her. If he bothered to think about what she was giving up for her friend, it was admirable in a way. But also sad. “You’re a beautiful woman, you know that? You’re smart, funny...”
“Is this your if-things-were-different speech?” The corners of her mouth quirked up.
“Yeah.” He snorted. “I guess so.”
“This is my life.” She shrugged. “It’s not likely to change any time soon. I can’t leave Ashton.”
“Why not?” The question popped out. There went his determination to stay professional. He held up his hands. “It isn’t my business, I know. But, why all the lies? Why the pretending? Does he really need to hide behind you?”
“With me around his family doesn’t try to set him up with women. Any time someone floats the gay rumor, people point at me. Professionally it doesn’t matter. Ashton has proven himself. People are far more interested in his money than his sexual orientation. It’s all about family. When he comes out, he’ll lose them. His mom, dad, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins. They won’t have anything to do with him. He’s made peace with that, except where his grandmother is concerned. She’s special to him and he’s not ready to give her up yet. It’s all a personal journey. No one can push him to do it faster. And as someone with no living family? I think he should do what feels right even if it looks wrong. I’d do just about anything for another day with my mom.”
“And you’re okay putting your life on hold?”
“Who says my life is on hold? So I can’t date.” Carla shrugged and tipped her chin up. Defiance was a good look on her, but those sad eyes of hers ruined it. She might say she was okay with this, but she wanted more. What rational human being didn’t? “There’s more to life than being with a man. Even a hot, hunky one like yourself. No offense.”
“None taken.” He chuckled.
“How’s your brother? Any word?”
Vaughn was grateful for the change in conversation. He didn’t want to examine anything between them very deep. “Santiago went to a rehab place a few hours ago. Mom’s getting some rest. I probably won’t hear anything for a few days while he finishes detox.” More than that, neither Vaughn nor his mother would have to worry about Santiago for the duration of his stay. It was a break they all needed.
“I hope he gets better.”
“Me, too.”
“So, what do you do to stay awake all night watching such riveting TV?”
“That’s a good question.” He chuckled. There really was no answer to that.
“Is this normal?”
“We always keep a twenty-four-hour watch. Used to I’d do the day shift and Brenden would take the night.”
“Brenden, the big, brooding guy?”
“Yeah.” Vaughn nodded. He wouldn’t share his team mates struggle with his inner demons. “We changed things up months ago.”
They descended into silence.
He wanted to keep her talking, but there was only so much to say about work. He didn’t trust himself when it came to getting personal with her. Even sitting here he could feel his resolve eroding.
She wasn’t just forbidden fruit. He was pretty damn certain he’d be aware of her like this regardless of her availability.
“You know,” her smile amped up a bit, but she kept looking out at the ocean, “if you took a picture it would last longer?”
“Sorry.” He shook his head.
“Don’t be.” Now she turned her head and met his gaze. “I’m not.”
And neither was he.
“I guess I should go back to bed.” She placed her hands on the table. “Thanks for the talk.”
Vaughn had a dozen thoughts in his head, things he wanted to say to her, tell her, but all he could do was sit there in silence as she pushed to her feet. She turned, dragging her fingers along the table then the back of his hand.
He was letting her walk away from him.
This woman was unique. She was special. Her touch permeated his limb, all the way to his bones.
If he let her walk away, would he regret it for the rest of his life?
Her hand slid up his arm to his shoulder.
He grasped her wrist, pressing her palm to him.
What was he doing? Wasn’t this what he’d said he wouldn’t do?
Little zips of electricity shot through his body and in that moment he saw the world clearer than ever before.
Regrets were opportunities not taken.
Carla might not ask for more, but he’d seen the sadness in her eyes. She wanted more, and damn it, so did he.
Vaughn shoved the chair back and stood.
This didn’t make sense. He wasn’t operating in a rational way, but this felt right.
He turned and her hand slid down his chest. Carla stared up at him, her eyes a little wider, lips parted. He wrapped his arms around her, bringing her up against his chest. Blood rushed past his ears, drowning out everything else as he bent his head.
Their lips touched and the only thing that mattered was getting closer. Carla’s hands gripped his shoulders, her nails biting into his skin. He kept a tight grip, molding her body to his. Her lips parted, and he tasted her once more.
So damn good.
She nipped
his lower lip. He growled into her mouth and pushed her back, trapping her body between him and the glass wall. Her thighs parted, and he pressed between her legs.
It was Carla who broke the kiss. She turned her face, sucking down air.
He pressed his lips to her cheek, his appetite not yet sated.
“Tell me it’s not better every time,” he whispered.
This close, he saw every little reaction. Her eyes went up, latching on the moon. Moisture pooled in her eyes and he felt the tremble shake her.
He knew where her mind was going. It was the hamster wheel he’d been on for most of the evening.
“Damn it.” He cupped her cheek. “Carla?”
“It’s just because this is all so fucked up, okay?”
“It isn’t.” He kissed her cheek. “I kept trying to tell myself that.”
She squeezed her eyes shut.
He’d made her cry once. Never again.
“I sat out here and told myself it’s because of the sneaking around or that I can’t really have you or whatever other reason you can think about. But then here you are and it’s none of that. It’s just you and I don’t want to regret...”
She buried her face against his shoulder and drew in a shuddering breath. He stroked her sides and shifted to hold her, not just trap her.
“What the fuck are we doing?” she mumbled into his shirt
“I don’t know.”
“Seriously.” She pushed at his shoulder so he gave her a little space. She stared up at him, so much emotion shining back at him. “What the fuck, Vaughn?”
“I don’t know.” He ran his knuckles over her cheek. They both had choices. It was time for her to decide. “You want to go back upstairs?”
Her throat worked and a wrinkle on her brow deepened. Her eyes searched his face.
This wasn’t a thrilling fling. Nothing about this was simple. Just standing here holding each other invited a measure of risk if they were found.
Vaughn smoothed her hair back. “You go back upstairs and this never happened. We keep on being who we’re supposed to be, and that’s it.”
“I don’t like any of my options,” she whispered.
“Neither do I, but I’m not going to keep fighting this.”
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