by Kira Blakely
LAURA
“I don’t understand,” Laura said as she leaned over Ashton’s shoulder. He’d been sitting there, lost in thought for the last few minutes, and she was desperate to have him say anything at all.
She’d sensed he was withdrawing from her for a while, now but she did not know what to do about it. She had hoped, as time passed and they continued on together, that they’d be able to keep dating. But while she had had a huge change of heart and found herself wanting more than just a friends-with-benefits thing or a passing fling, Ashton still didn’t want that.
It was obvious he didn’t want that, and she had no idea how to change his mind or to tell him how she felt. Her tension mounted when he looked at her with a carefully blank expression on his face that just made the distance growing between them seem even wider. Her heart ached, and the words she wanted to say to him quivered on her tongue. I love you. I want you. I want us. Please talk to me. Please try to stay with me.
Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes and a lump formed in her throat. She had known from the start that this – that they – would end, but now that it was so clear that they were, she was being sideswiped by a pain unlike any she had ever felt or known ever before, and she didn’t know how to deal with it, or his withdrawing from her the way that he was doing.
Ashton said, “Well basically, we upload it and wait.”
“Wow. I mean, it’s never really felt real until just now.”
She was not talking about the app. She was talking about the two of them breaking things off. Ashton said, “Yeah I get that,” in a voice so neutral she wanted to scream and yell at him to look at her, to hear her and understand what she was trying to say to him. Her heart ached so much, it hurt all the way down into her bones. Her body missed his, and the increasing lack of sex between them frightened her. Were they so far gone that they didn’t even have passion anymore?
Ashton took a slow breath and hit a button. He stood up, snapping the laptop closed. “I’m sorry to say it, because it’s been such a big night, but I have a super early morning, and I need to head out.”
Laura licked her lips. Lexie had moved in with Dawson officially now, and Laura hadn’t bothered looking for a new roommate yet, because Lexie had insisted on paying a final month of rent before going. Now she wished that she had. The place was lonely and too quiet.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, sorry.” He dropped a casual kiss on her cheek and headed for the door. Laura stood there, staring at his back as he went out the door and closed it. Her lips pressed together. The tears sprang out of her eyes and fell down her cheeks. It was true whether she wanted it to be or not – and she didn’t want it to be true, not at all – they were done.
11
ASHTON
THE DAYS PASSED. Ashton put as much distance between himself and Laura as possible, even though their app was an overnight sensation. He sat at a bar one night, his head down and his eyes locked on the melting ice at the bottom of the glass. His body hurt. He missed Laura so much he could barely breathe.
“Well, look who it is.”
God damn it. This was all he needed. Ashton lifted his head and stared Gerald in the eye. His voice was weary. “Yeah, it’s me. Tell me something, did you even consider I might call the cops after you jumped me like that?”
“Nah,” Gerald’s rotting teeth gleamed as he leaned against the bar. “You’re from the hood. You know how that would play out.”
“Yeah, I was. But you know what? I am a really fucking rich dude now, Gerald, and I could tear your world out of the frame without ever calling the cops. Because that’s what rich fucks do. You know that. You know what else? I can’t believe after all these years you’re still trying to run up on me over that arrest of yours. You came at me with that shit in your pockets. I didn’t have a choice in that fight, but you did.
“You could have handed that dope off before it ever got started, or something. You came at me trying to defend your dad’s block and got yourself jammed up as a result. That’s how it was, and I am damn tired of your pretending otherwise.”
Gerald’s face shifted. He looked uneasy. “You shouldn’t have been running lookout for the enemy.”
Ashton shot back. “Pete had the right to do business, and I’d be real careful calling him your enemy if everything I hear about him is true.”
Gerald went pale. “They say he’s a killer.”
Ashton said, “That’s what I hear, too. You sure you want to keep running that road with me or get yourself twisted into a mess with Pete because you’re still pissed about your dad slipping the way he did? It was his own fault, you know, just like you deciding to beat me down while you had that much dope in your pockets was your fault. But I’m telling you right now, you pull some shady shit like you pulled in that garage on me ever again, the next stretch you do won’t end until you’re wearing that underwear that keep old folks from pissing their pants.”
Gerald sighed and leaned against the bar. “He’s dead, you know. That’s why. I mean, I was reeling over it that night at the bar and after you and that chick went crazy on us, I had to break even with you. You got to know that.”
“I’d say we’re even.”
Gerald’s eyes went to the glass in Ashton’s hand, and he licked his lips in a gesture he probably wasn’t even aware of. Ashton pointed to the bartender and held up his glass and two fingers. The bartender set a glass in front of them, and Gerald said, “Thanks.”
“I didn’t know he was dead. I’m sorry if you’re miserable about it, but I can’t say that I care.” Ashton swallowed the whiskey in his glass in one shot. Gerald sipped his slowly, his beady eyes walking across the bottles behind the bar.
“Course I’m miserable,” Gerald said softly. “No matter what, I loved my Pop. Yeah, he was dumb, and yeah, he went down like a little bitch but…well you know…it is what it is.”
Ashton wanted to give out some caustic retort to that, but he didn’t. “I wish it hadn’t been the way it was, but I doubt if I had told you that you would have listened back then.”
“I guess you might have a point. I mean, you know how that is right? You got to take care of your own. You have to take care of your family, man,” Gerald said. “What can you do?”
“Nothing.” Ashton stood and headed for the door. The last thing he wanted to do was keep up a conversation with Gerald or think about the woman who’d stolen his heart so easily.
12
LAURA
“Oh, my God!” Laura sat down on her sofa, her mouth hanging open. It was impossible! But the truth was right there in front of her. Ashton had put her in charge of payments through the app because of her accounting degree, and that he trusted her with that had not seemed odd at the time. She had not expected that they would make a single dollar off it.
But they had. They’d made a million dollars in fact, and in just a matter of days!
A low squeak came from her lips. The room swayed around her. Panic set in. She had to tell Ashton! Now!
She grabbed her phone and then stopped. He would probably not answer anyway. So, fuck that. She’d go to his place.
But what if he didn’t answer the door, or worse, he did and he had another woman with him?
That was enough to leave her standing there, stunned with indecision. God, she could not take it if he had moved on already and she had to see that firsthand!
Her heart told her that she didn’t dare risk it. That she was too fragile and she needed him too much. That if he was with someone else that was okay, as long as she didn’t have to face that woman.
But the strong and resilient part of her called bullshit on that. She had to see him. That app was blowing up, and whether they were over or not, that app was a marvel – something they had created together and now they were partners in. It was time to go to him and tell him that.
And everything else, too.
It was time to tell him just how she felt. To lay it all out on the table and
leave nothing unsaid. If they were over, she had the right to know that, and she had the right to tell him how she felt, too, even if he didn’t feel the same way.
Laura grabbed her handbag and headed out the door.
***
She stood outside his door, her resolve slowly dying away. Her hand, raised to knock, hung in the air and a lump formed in her belly. Should she do it, or just leave him a message that they were rich and walk away?
“Laura?”
His voice came from behind her, and she turned slowly, her heart pounding in her chest. He stood there, his wheat-hued hair disheveled and a slight tang of alcohol rising from his clothes. “Hi,” she said softly. “I…do you care about me? I mean, I know you need your freedom. My God, I do know that. I just need to know – are we over? Is there any chance that we’re not? Any at all?”
Jesus. Now she was in a hallway, saying things she had planned to say to him in private, with tears running down her face. It would not have surprised her at all if he had called security and had her hustled out of the building!
Ashton stepped forward. His arms went around her, and he hugged her close for a moment before muttering, “Let me get the door.”
He released her and opened the door. He held it open, and she stepped inside with him close on her heels.
He looked at her, and the expression on his face tugged at her heart strings. He said, “I do, Laura. I do. I shouldn’t because I know you don’t want what I want…”
“What do you want, and how do you know I don’t want that, too?”
His face showed surprise and something else: hope. He licked his lips. “I want you but I want you all the time. I don’t want to let you go. I know you need your freedom. I know you don’t want marriage and you don’t want kids. I want marriage, but I’m with you on the kids. Jesus. No way do I want to screw up some little kid’s life, and I’m pretty sure I would.”
Her voice was thick with tears. “I do want that: marriage, and maybe even kids one day. I know we’re both screwed up and neither of us know the first thing about love, but…but I love you, Ashton. I don’t know why or how this happened. All I know is that I love you, and I want to be with you. I’m done running wild. I have been for a long time I think. Ever since the day you came into my life.”
He moved toward her. “Do you mean it?”
She swallowed hard and nodded. “I do. I mean it with all my heart. I love you, and I want to be with you. I want us. I want us to be a couple – a real one. I want us to have a whole life together, but you have to want all of that. I am willing to wait for kids. I am. I am not willing to wait for you to decide that you love me.’
His smile was bright. “You don’t have to wait to know if I love you. I do. Holy shit. I have no idea what happened. I tried so hard not to fall in love with you because I was so sure that you would never want us, not in the way it seems we want us to be. But I fell so hard for you, and I got scared and I ran, because I was afraid I would get hurt and I have had so much of that already in my life. I was a first-class dick. Can you forgive me?”
“Only if you can forgive me for not talking to you and for not telling you how I felt. I wanted to, but I was just so afraid you would say no to it all.”
They began walking toward each other. His arms went around her again. Their bodies collided and met. His head lowered, and his eyes burned into hers. “I guess we were both guilty of being stupid and not talking. I wasn’t honest with you about how I felt, and I wasn’t honest about something else either.”
Her heart stood still. Terror caught her up in a cold grip. What? What could he have been dishonest with her about? “Ashton…”
“I’m rich. I created, with a friend of mine named Jackson, that app Fly by Night. It was ours first, and we sold it for a massive amount of money after we had already made a giant fortune off it. I made that site and app and…I’m rich.”
Laura’s mouth fell open. Confusion struck. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
The look on his face said it all. “Because I thought you’d leave anyway, and I didn’t want to keep you by buying you.”
“I see.” Her heart loosened and a laugh came bubbling up. “I guess lightning does strike twice then.”
He frowned, “What do you mean?”
Her smile filled her entire face and lifted her cheekbones. “I mean, our app is a huge success. It’s made nearly a million bucks already! So, you don’t have to worry that I want you for your money now, because it seems I have plenty of my own.”
His laughter was long and booming. He grabbed her and swung her in the air, spinning her until she was dizzy. Her feet touched the ground finally, and he kissed her, making her feel like she was still in his arms, flying in circles.
He loved her! He loved her and she loved him, and they were going to have a life together and be together.
His hands stroked across her hair, then slid down to her shoulders. His fingers, long and strong, curled up there, digging into her skin just slightly as he brought her closer so that he could kiss her again. That kiss was far more serious and passion awakened. Laura had always wanted him, and now that she knew why he had been avoiding sleeping with her, and knew that he wanted her as much as she wanted him, she felt no fear or shame at all.
They undressed each other slowly in his bedroom, letting the sexual tension coil and rise between them. Her legs shook as she stepped back to stare at the utter magnificence of his body. Everything about him was gorgeous, even the small scar on his abs that she knew had come from a knife fight.
He was tough and gorgeous. He was wounded just like her. Their mouths met and held, his tongue going deep into hers to taste and tease hers into meeting his. His body followed hers down into the bed, and she let out a low cry of satisfaction as his hands found her breasts and then his tongue followed. He bathed her nipples with his tongue. His teeth tugged gently at the erect peaks, and then his lips closed over them while his hands squeezed the soft flesh of her breasts in a slow and maddening way. Laura’s body was on fire. She needed his touch so much that when he ran his hand down the curve of her waist and then fluffed her pubic hair in a careless gesture, she sucked in a long breath.
Her fingers explored his body. She found his member, already stiff and thick. His head was swollen and purple, and the vein around it throbbed as she whipped one leg over him and flipped him neatly onto his back.
She wanted to please him. She wanted to see him going as crazy with passion and need as she was. She needed him so much, but first she wanted to please him, to drive him crazy and to give him pleasure.
She scooted lower and took him into her throat, her tongue swirling along his flesh as she sucked in her cheeks and tightened her lips around his flesh.
His hips thrust forward, and her hands captured the heavy sack below his organ. She let her fingers cup it and then she moved her mouth to it, sucking gently as he gasped and moaned out her name.
Her mouth tightened around then eased away from his flesh. Her fingers caressed him, and she tickled his balls, stroking the sensitive skin between his nuts and asshole, relishing the way his breath sucked in and out as she did so. His balls tightened as she took them into her mouth and sucked on them gently along the shaft, stroking the belly with her tongue.
Her tongue swirled across the tight helmet and then rubbed the indented spot right below it. She nipped gently at the head, and he hissed in a breath. She kept it up, giving him as much pleasure as she could. She took her mouth off his cock and began to lick and suck at his testicles, putting them both in her mouth and sucking hard while her tongue swirled and dipped across the smooth surface of that flesh.
“Oh, God,” Ashton panted. “Laura, I can’t hold out very long. I’ve been going crazy trying to stay away from you. Get up here.”
His fingers tangled into her hair, tugging hard. She went and he grinned at her. Then he crawled down her body, licking and caressing her trembling flesh with real fervor. His breath tickled her and her pubic ha
ir grew even wetter, more tangled as his tongue slid between her inner and outer labia to find her hood and the nub of sensitive flesh nestled below.
His fingers continued to move in and out of her. His breath blew against the warm fluids coming from her and caused even more sensation to spike through her being.
Her hips arched, and her heels dug into the mattress as he moved faster, his tongue stroking and circling her clitoris. Her ass jerked up and down, and she groaned as the first spasms of a climax began deep within her.
Ashton came up slowly. His mouth was wet with her fluids, and he kissed her again, bringing the taste of her body to her mouth. Laura drank it in eagerly. His tongue slid out of her mouth as he spread her legs with his knee while his fingers and tongue went to her breasts.
Ashton moved swiftly, driving within her just as she began to come. Her walls closed around his rigid flesh, and her fingers gripped his bottom as he withdrew and thrust again, impaling her on his hard and throbbing flesh.
Their cries rose higher. The bed squeaked loudly, but Laura didn’t care. All she cared about was the orgasm bursting form her body, the feel of him inside her tight and oily tunnel, and the feel of his muscles clenching and releasing as he worked faster and harder.
They finally lay still. Ashton buried his face in her shoulders and her fingers traced his shoulders, his back, finding the knobs of his spine and then the smooth flesh of his buttocks.
***
They lay in his bed, breathing hard. Ashton said, “I can’t believe how lucky I am.”
“I can’t believe how lucky we are,” Laura returned. She was completed by his love, and felt completely whole from his lovemaking, and her voice was hushed and throaty as a result.
Ashton placed a hand on her sternum and rubbed downward gently, his thumb leaving a slim band of sensation in its wake. Laura shivered all over and wondered if he would think she was a nympho if she said she wanted more of him, and right then. “I agree. I mean, two people who never wanted to settle down or fall in love, did.”