“What are you doing?”
“I’m touching you.”
“Why are you doing that?”
“You touched me last night, so I’m touching you now.”
“I didn’t touch you. I licked your wound the way I told you I would, but I didn’t touch you in any other way. I wouldn’t presume.”
She didn’t stop. She stretched her arm to reach up his neck, but when she ran her hand down his neck to his side, he whipped his body away and got to his feet. He moved away, and his eyes burned in his pointed face when he turned around to glare at her. “Don’t do that.”
“Why? Don’t you like me touching you?”
“I like it very much—too much. Don’t do it anymore.”
Her hand fell to her side. “Oh. Okay. I won’t if you don’t want me to. I just wanted to make you feel as good as you made me feel last night.”
“I told you....”
“I know what you told me, but that can’t be right. I saw you and felt you. It doesn’t matter what you actually did. I felt it. To me, it happened.”
“I would never touch you like that, Moira. You’re a guest on our planet. I wouldn’t intrude on you without....”
“Without what? Without my permission? I’m giving you permission. I liked it, and I wanted it. I want you to do it again.”
“I don’t have to do it again. You’re healed now. You don’t feel any pain, do you?”
She thought it over. “No, I don’t feel any pain now.”
“I healed you. You can go back to your friends now. They’ll be worried about you, especially your doctor friend. She’ll wonder if you’re dead up here, and she’ll blame me.”
“I’m sorry. I thought you wanted it. I thought you wanted it as much as I did. I thought that’s why you licked me like that, to give me that vision so I would desire you.”
“I had no idea licking you would make you desire me. Anyway, I’m a dragon and you are a woman.”
“I know that.”
“Do you desire a dragon as your mate?”
Moira blinked. “I never thought of it like that. I only know what I experienced.”
“What did you experience? Tell me.”
“I had a vision of you doing it with me—mating with me, as you call it. Your licking, or your saliva, or whatever it was, filled my body with pleasure, stronger pleasure than I ever experienced any other time, with any man.”
“What did you see in your vision?”
“When we first landed here and the Krataks took me into their Keep, I saw a tapestry with what I thought was a man. The intricate patterns on the Krataks’ skin came out of the ground and grew up through his body and burst out all over him. Later I realized it wasn’t a man in the tapestry at all, but a dragon. The patterns spread out around his shoulders like wings and shot out through his mouth in flames of fire. That’s what I saw last night. You were the dragon, and the patterns came through you from the planet.”
He listened in silence. Then he shifted his weight away from her. “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I never touched you.”
“That doesn’t matter. You gave me pleasure. I only thought you might like it if I returned the favor.”
“How would you do that? You cannot mate with me like this. You’re too small.”
“I know it doesn’t make any sense.”
He let out a long breath. “You belong back in the Keep.”
She hung her head. “Thank you, anyway. Thank you for saving my life, and for everything else you’ve done for me. I’m ready to go back now.”
“I can’t take you back now. It’s getting dark. I’ll have to take you back in the morning.”
Moira looked around. “Isn’t it dawn?”
“No, it’s dusk. You slept all day. Your body needed to rest in order to heal. My saliva put you to sleep. Perhaps you had that vision in a dream.”
“No, I was definitely awake, because I remember the moment when you stopped. I remember it very distinctly, because as soon as you stopped licking me, I could tell you hadn’t actually touched me. I could tell it was only your saliva that made me think you had.”
“Then you understand I never transgressed against you.”
“I never thought you did transgress against me. I’m telling you, I wanted you to.”
He turned away. “Let’s not talk about this anymore. Are you hungry? I can bring you something to eat.”
“What will you bring?”
He bent his head behind a rock and brought out a linen sack. He carried it in his teeth and set it down at her feet. “Take it.”
She hefted the bag in her hand, but when she untied the string holding it closed, she found inside a haunch of roasted meat and what looked like some kind of bread. “Where did you get this?”
“From the Keep.”
“Did you steal it?”
“Steal it? How could I steal it?”
“I don’t see how you could sneak into the Keep without anybody seeing you, but I can’t think of any other way you could have gotten this.”
“I didn’t steal it. Does that satisfy you? Eat it. You’ll feel better.”
His assurance would have to satisfy her as she couldn’t see any other explanation for how he could get his.... his claws on a woven linen sack, tied closed with a double knot, and filled with food made by human hands.
She sat down on the boughs and tore off a chunk of the meat. Its juice filled her mouth with its savory flavor, and the bread satiated a hunger she didn’t realize she had.
She tied the bag closed the way she found it. “Do you want to put this away for later?”
“You can keep it. I brought it for you.”
“When did you do that?”
“While you were unconscious. I thought you might be hungry when you woke up.”
“Thank you for thinking of me.”
“I only want what’s best for you, Moira. I would take you back to the Keep now, but it’s too dark to fly. I’m afraid you’ll have to spend another night on the mountain.”
“I don’t mind spending another night on the mountain. Actually, I’m in no hurry to get back.”
“Aren’t you worried about your friends? You have a job to do back at the Keep.”
“We’re on this planet for a whole year. We have plenty of time to study the Krataks and their ways. Besides, the others will do the work. I won’t do much.”
“Why is that?”
“They’re scientists. They’re the real researchers. I’m the Allies representative. My job is to ensure the mission runs smoothly. I conduct political negotiations between the local inhabitants and the Allies if any come up, but I don’t think they will.”
“Why not?”
“Because the Allies set their sights on this planet, and they’ll get it, no matter what the Krataks think or do. This research mission is just a front to get our presence on the planet. The Allied Command will use any intelligence the team gathers to plan the next phase of our conquest of this planet. If the Krataks kick up a fuss, they’ll only make the situation worse for themselves in the long run.”
His eyes glittered, and his voice dropped to a low growl. “That’s what the Krataks fear about this research mission, and the Allies assured them that was not the case.”
“I’ve been on these research teams ten times before, and it’s always the same. The Allies will tell these people whatever they have to tell them to get their toe in the door. Once the locals agree to a research mission, they can’t say no to a permanent research station. After that, they can’t say no to an armed guard to protect the research equipment. After that, they can’t say no to a complex to house the scientists and a garrison to house the guard. And on and on it goes, until the Allies take over the planet. In between all that, the Allies offer incentives and subtle threats to make the locals join the Alliance. Once they agree to join, their native autonomous government goes out the window and the Allies put their own laws and governors in place. That’s the way i
t always works.”
“Then this whole research team is really an advance military force, exactly as the Krataks suspected.”
“The rest of the team doesn’t know that, though. They think it’s a genuine research operation, that they’re here to study an unusual culture and document it. If you ask Rose or Reyna, they’ll tell you the Allies’ intentions are perfectly benign.”
“How perfectly devious of you.”
“It’s not my idea. Somebody has to do it, and that’s my job.”
“And what happens after the locals join the Alliance?”
“They become a subject race, like the other members. They no longer have the right to make autonomous decisions, and if they buck the Allies’ control, the military comes in to straighten them out.”
“What happens if someone refuses to join the Alliance?”
“That doesn’t happen. The more they resist, the more pressure the Allies bring to bear until the locals buckle. Sooner or later, everybody joins. Everyone always has, and the Allies won’t let one planet slip through their fingers. If they did, they wouldn’t be able to control all the others. Their dominance would crumble.”
“Hmm. I see.”
She settled herself down among his warm coils for the night. “I’m glad I can talk to you about this. No one else knows. It’s hard carrying a secret like this from your own friends.”
“I suppose you know what would happen if the Krataks found out about this.”
“Nothing would happen. Even if the Krataks got wind of it and decided to expel the team early, the Allies would simply step up their operation. They would take over right away, with no more polite overtures. Like I said, the Krataks are much better off doing it this way.”
He wrapped his tail around her in the nest and moved his head closer so she smelled the sulfur on his breath. “And what happens to you after you facilitate the conquest?”
“I go home, I collect my pay, and I go back to my life.”
“And that’s what you’ll do when you leave Kratak, I suspect.”
“Exactly.”
He turned his head aside. She couldn’t see his eyes. “And the Krataks will be left to twist in the wind.”
“That’s right.”
“Do you ever think perhaps you might be doing the wrong thing?”
“Wrong? Who knows what’s right and wrong? The Allies are dominant. Somebody has to be, and it just happens to be them right now. If it wasn’t them, it would be someone else. Most of these backward cultures really are better off with the Allies. They have no technology and no medical care. They’re primitive. Joining the Allies is the best thing for them.”
“I’m sure they would rather be primitive and retain their autonomy than become chattels to a tyrannical military power.”
“The Allies aren’t tyrannical.”
“I think, Moira, you would find the situation very different if you looked at it from the Krataks’ point of view.”
“I’m sure it would, but I’m not on the Krataks’ side. I’m on the Allies’ side.”
“Right.”
The silence grew and grew until it took up the whole night. Moira closed her eyes and drifted over the mountains on the rising drafts of warm air. The interlocking patterns filled the whole planet and everything in it. They penetrated the ground and the plants, and the animals ate them so the patterns formed their bodies, too.
Those same patterns found their way into Moira. She breathed them in, she ate them with the food the dragon gave her, and they touched her skin through the boughs underneath her. No matter which way she turned, they conquered her and made her a part of this planet, just like themselves.
She turned on her side, and her face bumped against the dragon’s body. She didn’t recoil, but buried her face in that slick, scaly surface. She trailed her lips over the smooth texture. When she laid her hand on it, electric power surged through her and reignited the delirious rapture she experienced yesterday at his touch.
“What are you doing, Moira?”
“I’m touching you. Don’t you want me to?”
“You don’t know what you’re doing. If you knew, you wouldn’t do that.”
“I know what I’m doing. I want to do it, and you want me to, too. Admit it. You like me touching you, so why do you keep telling me not to?”
“I’m a dragon, Moira. You’re a woman.”
“Do you desire me?”
He spoke directly to her soul. “You know I do.”
She scooted her body closer to his. She brushed her breasts against his rough hide and raised one knee to graze her pubis against his flank. “I know you’re a dragon, but everything about you makes me desire you. I’ve never desired anything as much as this. I can’t live without this. I’m going out of my mind.”
He turned his head away. “You don’t know what you’re doing.”
“Then explain it to me.”
“You’ll ruin us both. You’ll ruin everything.”
“I don’t care.”
His head swung up. “You don’t really mean that. You just got finished telling me you would return to your own world when your mission ended, that you would take your pay and go back to your old life. If you don’t stop touching me right now, that will never happen. You aren’t really ready to turn your back on everything you know to mate with a dragon.”
She thought that over. Of course, he was right. She didn’t understand his warning, but she recognized the inherent sense in it. She could want him all she liked. He could turn her on like nothing else, but underneath it all, they were just too far apart. She wasn’t ready to throw over everything to be his. “You still haven’t told me your name.”
He twisted away from her. He contorted his long body around and lifted himself onto his four feet. He left her cold and alone in the nest, and when she got to her feet to face him, and his eyes glowed in the night. An eerie iridescence shimmered on his skin so she saw him clearly, even in the dark. “If you go back to the Allies when this mission ends, you will never know my name.”
“Why? Why can’t I know your name?”
“There are many things you will never know about this planet and its people. You are an enemy of our planet. You just said so yourself.”
“Of the Krataks, maybe, but you’re not one of them. We’re something apart from them. Why do we have to be enemies?”
“You told me before you saw patterns in everything here.”
“That’s right.”
“Do you see them in me, too?”
“Yes. I told you that.”
“Then you understand why being an enemy of Kratak and its people makes you an enemy to me. Those patterns make me a part of this planet just like the people. If you destroy them and the planet, you destroy me. If you conquer and subjugate the people, you conquer and subjugate me. Is that what you want?”
“Of course not. I don’t want to destroy anybody.”
“And yet that’s exactly what you’re doing. That’s what you’re here for, and when you’re finished, you’ll go home and forget all about me. How can you think of mating with me?”
Her voice cracked. Every word stabbed her heart to pieces. “What am I supposed to do, then? I can’t change what I am.”
“I can see the patterns, too, Moira. We all do. That’s all we do see when we use our eyes to see the world around us. That’s why the Krataks create those pictures they keep in their Keeps. That’s the way they see their world, and I can see the patterns in you, too. When you first came to this planet, you had no pattern at all. They were weak when I first brought you here, but they keep getting stronger the longer you stay here. You can feel them, can’t you?”
She couldn’t speak above a whisper. “Yes.”
“Give yourself over to the pattern, Moira. Make yourself their friend and ally instead of their enemy. Choose them.”
“That would mean making the Allies my enemy. How can I do that? I belong to the Allies. They’re my whole life.”
&n
bsp; “Then you can’t have me. You must choose. If you choose the Allies, I will keep you warm tonight and take you back to the Keep in the morning. You will rejoin your friends and continue with your domination agenda.”
“And what about you? Will you tell the Krataks what I told you about the Allies’ true intentions?”
“I don’t have to. They already know. Rowan Harkniss suspected the Allies’ intentions from the beginning, and no assurance from your deluded friends will change his mind. I know the other patriarchs agree with him.”
“How do you know that?”
“Come and lie down, Moira. It’s getting late, and you’re getting cold out there in the wind. I will keep you safe tonight, but do not touch me like that again.”
She sank down on the boughs, but a lump stuck in her throat. Competing loyalties and emotions tugged her in every direction. How could she turn her back on him, yet how could she turn her back on the Allies to choose him?
She closed her eyes in the pleasant bubble of his warmth, and the patterns swirled before her eyes. What if he was right? What if she was turning into a creature of this overarching pattern, just like the Krataks?
That would make her one of them. That would make her a target of the Allies’ agenda. That would make the Allies her enemy. She wasn’t just destroying him with her loyalty to the Allies. She was destroying herself.
This pattern pushed its way out of the planet to penetrate her every corpuscle, but in the end, it sprang from her very being. It was her, and she was it. Her true self manifested itself in its interwoven designs.
She lived her whole life in a lifeless, sterile world. She never understood the pattern of life. She never experienced herself as a living thing—until now. How could she turn her back on that?
She wanted it. She wanted the pattern to take over every inch of her skin and mind and soul. She wanted it to consume her and make her whole. She wanted it to burst from her skin to touch the rest of the planet with the same life-giving spark.
The dragon laid his big head next to her and purred through his smoky nostrils. Moira closed her eyes, and an unstoppable force pulled her head to one side until her lips touched his skin.
Rhani (Dragons of Kratak Book 3) Page 3