Children's Doctor, Shy Nurse

by Molly Evans

  He didn’t deny or confirm her observations. Mark grabbed her hand and stopped her from her task, holding onto her until she looked at him.

  Finally, she met his gaze, nearly trembling with emotion that she had denied lived in her. “What?”

  “There’s one more thing I am.”

  “What, football captain? Rugby captain? Debate team captain?” She meant to hurt him. She couldn’t stop herself from doing it. The intensity, the look, in his eyes was what stopped her, and she paused in her emotional tirade.

  “Cancer survivor.”

  The shock of his statement nearly drove her to her knees. “What?” she whispered and clutched his hand, despair and humiliation washing through her. Oh, God, she was so stupid.

  “I’m a cancer survivor,” he said and released her hand. “So I do know what it’s like to see your life passing you by. Every damned day.” His voice was gruff, and he closed his eyes for a moment.

  Tears filled her eyes, pain for him shot through her and she closed her eyes to hide her shame. “I’m so sorry, Mark. I didn’t know.” She knelt beside him and sat back on her heels, her head lowered. “I don’t know what’s coming out of my mouth sometimes.” She covered her face with her hands, unable to look up at him and see the hurt in his face that she had caused. “I’m sorry. It goes against everything that I am to be this way. I just didn’t know.”

  “I know you didn’t know. I asked Vicki and Sam not to tell you.”

  The sound of his soft voice, the forgiveness already there, made her want to weep, and she looked up at him, seeing the strength he’d had to find in himself. Reaching out, he eased her hands away from her face, then drew a line with one finger down her cheek.

  “But why? I would never have said those things had I known.” Tears leaked from the outer corners of her eyes, and she tried to brush them away on her shoulders.

  “So you wouldn’t treat me like a patient. Since surviving, I find that when people know of my history ahead of time they treat me differently than people who don’t know.” He shrugged and brushed away another tear with his thumb. “To them, I’m just a regular guy, and I like it that way.”

  Biting her lip, she hesitated, then blew out a long breath as she gathered her courage. “I’m sorry, Mark. Can I ask how you are doing now?”

  “Yeah. I’m about three years out from the last clean CAT scan.” He patted her hand and urged her up from her kneeling position. “Keep going with the oil. It feels good.”

  “Okay.” Now, she would do anything to make him feel better, even if it was only a small physical comfort. She could never make up for the harsh words she’d spoken, but she could sooth his troubled flesh. She stood and continued to dab and apply the oil to the multitude of welts across his back, chest, arms and legs. “Thankfully, you were smart enough to do the bag trick. I don’t know what would have happened to you had you been more exposed. Those little beasties are evil.”

  “No. I’m sure they were just protecting their nest. Some hornets nest in the ground, and Skinny may have simply stepped on one.” He sighed and his eyes drooped a little.

  “After I dose you up, I’d like to call the hospital and check on him again. Check on Bear, too.”

  “Sounds good.” Mark stifled a huge yawn. “Wow. Looks like the Benadryl is kicking in.”

  “Didn’t even need the whiskey. Why don’t you go lie down in the ward room, and I can finish applying the rest of the oils to your legs and back there?”

  Nodding, Mark stood and moved to the ward room and crawled facedown onto the nearest bed. “Man, I’m tired.”

  “It’s been quite a day, hasn’t it?” she asked.

  Chuckling into the pillow, he then turned his head to the side. “Understatement of the year, I think.”

  “Between the meds and the oils, I think you’re going to pass out here in a few minutes.”

  Another yawn claimed him, and he nodded. “Your powers of observation are astute.”

  “That’s why they pay me the big bucks. One of the best skills a nurse can have is observation.” Glad to see that he was truly feeling better and not upset about her comments, a warm glow began in her chest. Her touch and the oils were going to finish the job in just a few moments.

  His words—cancer survivor—echoed in her mind. He knew what it was to suffer, and he’d survived. There was no greater achievement in her eyes.

  Mark allowed sleep to claim him. Undeterred by his lack of consciousness, Ellie continued to minister to his wounds. Actually, now that he was asleep, she felt freer to explore his body with her hands, to satisfy her need to touch him, to soothe him and to bring him a comfort that she wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise. After the lavender, she poured her special mix of healing oils into the palm of one hand, then rubbed her hands together to warm the oil. Starting at his feet hanging over the edge of the bunk, she took her time and rubbed the oil into his skin, noting old scars here and there from minor injuries. She saw no surgical scars and concluded that they must be on his abdomen, and she’d simply missed them. Astute observation skills, eh?

  His skin quickly absorbed the healing oils, and she moved upward over his calves, thighs, then his back and arms. Each touch, each stroke of her hand, she infused with her own healing energy that she hoped would bring him comfort.

  “Ellie, you ought to consider massage therapy,” Mark mumbled. “This is incredible.”

  She bit back the startled gasp that wanted to escape. “I thought you were asleep.” She’d hoped he’d been asleep and hadn’t heard her words of whispered sympathy.

  “I’m kind of in a waking coma right now.”

  She smiled at that, knowing exactly how that felt after an aromatherapy treatment. Stress was nowhere to be found at that point. “Turn over, and I’ll do the welts on the front.”

  “I’m not sure if I can move.” But he turned slowly and collapsed onto his back. With a sigh of contentment, he closed his eyes again. “Go to work, Nurse.”

  “Yes, Doctor.” She poured and warmed more oil and started again at his feet, working her way up. Though underweight a little, he had a beautiful body, and his muscles were toned and well formed. As she reached the top of his chest and neck, she found that her hands trembled as she stroked his skin. He opened his eyes, and she caught her breath at the heat in his gaze. Yet he didn’t move. He waited for her.

  Her mouth went dry, and she tried to swallow. Unable to look away from the need in his gaze, she froze. She hadn’t allowed a man into her life for a long time. She’d been too caught up in helping her parents with her father’s illness. Not that she hadn’t dated on occasion, but Mark was right. She’d been watching life pass her by, and she hadn’t even been aware of it. Did she dare try to stop and savor the moment presented to her right now?

  Dropping her gaze to his mouth, some feminine instinct parted her lips. “Mark?” She didn’t know what she was asking him. The question wasn’t clear in her mind, and she didn’t know how to translate that to him.

  “Yes.” He swallowed and raised his hands to cup her neck, drawing her slightly toward him. “Whatever it is, the answer is yes.”

  Unable to resist the draw of him, the pull of her heart toward him, she let herself go, and lowered her mouth to his. Though he’d kissed her earlier, this contact was completely different. This was need like she’d never known and it drew on her own suppressed needs.

  He devoured her. Parting her unresisting lips, he drew her tongue into his mouth. Unable to suppress the heat of desire that gripped her, the glide of his tongue against hers tightened the knot in her stomach. Lord, the man knew how to kiss. Tremors that started somewhere in her middle spread through her body. Turning her head to the side, she parted her lips more and gave herself to Mark’s heat.

  Struggling to control the reaction of his body, Mark dragged Ellie against his chest and groaned. The feel of her weight against him, the taste of her sweetness and the fragrances mingling between them drew on every sense he had. For the
moment, time ceased to move.

  Ellie relaxed against him, and he savored every movement she made. She was lovely and caring, and he wanted to know her more than he’d suspected when they’d met. After thoroughly exploring her mouth, he released her and eased her upright.

  She took in deep breaths, as did he. With one hand, he brushed her bangs back from her face. He liked her face and the animation she allowed to show now and then. There were mysteries and secrets hidden inside Ellie, and he wanted to discover what they were.

  “Wow.” She sat on the edge of the bunk beside him, and he was pleased that she didn’t move away. One of her hands rested on his chest, and he liked the contact.

  “Wow is right,” he said. There was spark and chemistry between them, but he knew it took more than that to have a relationship that meant something. “Another surprise in a day full of them.”

  “Yes. Well.” She glanced away, the movements of her hands busy and nervous now. “I have evening clinic in a little while. Dinner’s in a few minutes, but I’m sure you’d rather stay here and rest.” Reaching behind him, she straightened his pillow, and avoided his gaze. Back to nurse mode again. “I’ll see if Bear can make a tray for you.”

  “Just a sandwich or two will work. Don’t go to much trouble. I’ll probably just sleep an hour or two.”

  Nodding, she rose, but he took her hand before she could get too far away. The medications and the events of the day were taking their toll on him, and he struggled to stay awake. “Will you stay with me tonight? In the ward room, I mean?”

  “Yes. I’ll stay.” She brushed her hand over his face. “Go to sleep for a while now though. I’ll be back in a bit.” She moved to the foot of the bed and pulled a sheet up over him, then untucked it at the bottom. Leaning over, she kissed his forehead, then left the room.

  A few hours later, after dinner and the clinic, Ellie reentered the ward room. Mark had adjusted his position and lay more on his right side, facing the doorway. His breathing came slow and deep, and she hoped the sleep was restorative for him.

  Easing a bed closer to his, she tried to make as little noise as possible, but the feet of the bunk screeched across the wooden floor. “Darn it,” she whispered.

  Mark shifted and opened his eyes a crack. “Hi.”

  “Hi. I’m sorry I woke you.” She leaned over and touched the back of her hand to his neck, then his forehead. He felt okay. “How are you doing? Did the sleep help?”

  “Yeah. Yeah.” He stretched and then took her hand. “What time is it?”

  “About ten.”

  “I’ve slept for six hours?” he asked, his voice husky with sleep.

  “Yeah.”

  “And you let me, didn’t you?”

  “Yeah, I did. You needed it. I’m still having waking nightmares about hornets, and I’m frankly not sure I’ll be able to sleep tonight.” She shivered.

  “Don’t worry. It’s over, and everyone’s okay.” Mark rose and scrubbed his face with his hands. “I’ll be back in a few.” He allowed his fingers to trail down her arm as he left the room. Returning in a few minutes, he had foraged in the kitchen and found the sandwiches that Bear had sent, and a two-liter bottle of soda.

  Ellie settled down on her bunk with one of her books and watched as Mark plowed through the food and downed the entire bottle of soda.

  “That was fast. Are you going to need an antacid now?” she asked and parked her reading glasses on her nose, then turned on her book light.

  “Nope. There are times when my appetite goes from zero to ravenous in a nanosecond, and this was one of those times. My metabolism kicks into overdrive.” He patted his stomach and lay back on the bed; a contented sigh rolled out of him.

  Though he had kissed her a couple of times, and she had offered him the comfort of her touch and healing oils, she didn’t quite know what was really going on between them. Though they lived and worked together, she really couldn’t say they were dating, and he’d not yet asked her out. This was a strange situation. Focusing on her book, she tried to see the print in front of her, but she’d read the same passage three times already and sighed, trying to remember what oil went with what.

  “What are you thinking so hard about over there?” Mark asked.

  Ellie looked up. Mark hadn’t changed positions and remained with his eyes closed. “What makes you think I’m thinking hard about something?” she asked.

  “I know the sounds of a female with something on her mind,” he said and opened his eyes to peer at her in the near dark. “I grew up with three sisters. I know how the female mind operates.”

  “Ha,” she said and snapped her book closed. “Did your sisters ever tell you that?” Secretly she smiled, but kept her face neutral.

  “Hardly. They’re too sneaky for that.” Turning onto his side, he faced her and she put her book down. “Is there something you want to talk about?”

  “Aside from hornets?”

  “Aside from hornets.” The bunks were just inches apart and he reached out to take her hand.

  Looking down at the way their fingers intertwined, she wondered if that was how people’s lives intersected. So far she’d been too preoccupied with school, work and helping her parents that she hadn’t been entwined with anyone since Alan. Had she gone too far to be able to find her way back? To be able to truly reach out for another and risk getting hurt? “I’m sorry, Mark. I should go back to my room. I don’t want to keep you up.”

  “No, you shouldn’t. I’d like you to stay with me here tonight. Will you?” He squeezed her hand, and his eyes drifted down again. The effects of the medications and the stings still remained in his system. She thought of offering him another aromatherapy treatment, but decided that sleep would probably be the best thing for him.

  “I will.”

  He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her knuckles. What a sweet gesture. She closed her eyes and listened to him breathing. The sound comforted her in a way she didn’t know was possible. She extracted her hand from his grasp without waking him and covered him with a sheet.

  In the darkness, she listened to the sounds of the night and wondered if she were already falling for a man she barely knew.

  CHAPTER NINE

  ELLIE woke the next morning to find Mark already up, showered and ready for the clinic. The horrors of the previous day had been slow to leave her brain. Every noise in the ward room had startled her subconscious until the wee hours of the morning, preventing her from having a good sleep. A yawn, a stretch; she rose and staggered to the coffeepot in the kitchen. Filling a ceramic mug, she took it with her into the shower and let the water pound her brain awake.

  Mark stood in the doorway of the kitchen as she left the bathroom. The way he looked at her made her breath pause. He was so vibrant and alive in that moment. The welts had faded to pink overnight, and she almost didn’t notice them. Then he smiled, and her heart fluttered erratically in her chest. She knew that a man like Mark couldn’t go for a woman like her. Not long-term. She was too shy, too focused on her work, too ordinary to really attract him. At least, that’s what Alan had told her over and over. Sure, while she was right under Mark’s nose he was interested, but the second their ways parted, she’d be just an addendum to his summer in Maine. And she didn’t want that. Couldn’t handle it. What she wanted, and what she needed, was what her parents had had together. She glanced at the photo of them on the worktable. She’d settle for nothing less than that.

  “I called and checked on Skinny.”

  “Oh, how is he?” she asked and stepped forward, then paused as a small herd of about fifteen children roared into the infirmary.

  “I’ll tell you right after clinic,” he said and looked at the group of kids. “Now who’s first?”

  All of them shouted, “Me!”

  Despite waking up on the tired side, Ellie had to laugh. The sight of Mark surrounded by the squealing children all vying for his attention was something to see. His laughter overrode the noise of th
e kids. When he looked over their heads and his gaze locked on hers, something in her heart cramped. “I gotta go.” Before she could give herself a chance to fall into the trap of his green, green eyes, she turned and fled to her room.

  Frowning, Mark watched Ellie rush down the hall. “What was that about?” he mumbled aloud.

  “Dr. Mark, I need my inhaler,” one child said with an audible wheeze that captured his attention. “I’m Tommy Brooks.”

  “You sure do.” Each child had a medication file of their own. Mark reached in to Tommy’s file and extracted the requested rescue inhaler and shook it. “One puff, wait a few seconds, then the other, okay?”

  “I know. I’m not a kid,” Tommy said with a roll of his eyes.

  “You’re right. Go for it.” Mark tried not to laugh at the expression on the boy’s face.

  Tommy raised the device to his mouth and administered the medication as instructed.

  Mark finished the short morning clinic, then knocked on Ellie’s door. “Are you okay?” he asked.

  With a smile that looked artificial, she opened the door. The glance she darted at him didn’t meet his gaze. “Sure. I’m fine. Just didn’t sleep well last night.”

  “Did I snore or something?” he asked, hoping he hadn’t talked in his sleep. Who knew what secrets a man could reveal under the influence of Benadryl and aromatherapy? Now he was glad he hadn’t added the whiskey on top of that.

  “No. It’s okay.” She left the room with her pack of aromatherapy bottles in her hand. “I think I’m going to do a treatment on myself. I’m still a little freaked out by yesterday.” She looked up at him and her face brightened. “Oh, you said you had a report on Skinny.”

  “Yeah,” Mark said and followed her to the common room. “He’s off the ventilator, breathing well on his own and out of ICU. Should be out of the hospital in a day or two.”

  “That’s great news. Does Bear know?”

  “He’s the one who told me. He must have been over at the hospital at dawn.” Mark wanted to reach out and ease the vulnerability and skittishness that he saw in her today, but thought better of it. Maybe it was just having spent an ill night that made her so jumpy. He hoped so. He hoped that the intimacy of helping him yesterday hadn’t interfered in their professional relationship or the friendship he was beginning to enjoy with her. Though he knew he couldn’t truly reach out to her the way he would have wanted to had circumstances been different, something about her continued to attract him. Clenching his fists, he resisted the urge that tried to draw him closer to her.