“I want to know what happened. Why she married my father and gave up being a Witch. I need to know.”
“I wish Nana had told you before she left. I’m still not sure why she didn’t. You have every right to know. I guess she didn’t think you were ready.”
“But I am ready,” Amber said adamantly. “I have to know, now more than ever when I’m about to take such a big step toward my future. How can I possibly understand who I am when I don’t understand why my mother and father did what they did.
“I’m not the one who should tell you.”
“But you know don’t you?”
Her aunt looked down at her hands.
“You do know.”
“Yes. I know,” she said, looking back up at Amber.
“Maybe Nana didn’t tell me because it was too painful for her to relive that time. Maybe she was hoping someone else would tell me. Maybe that someone is you.”
An eternity seemed to pass while her aunt struggled with what Amber could only imagine was an internal debate in her head before she said with a sigh. “Let’s have a cup of tea and we’ll talk,”
Once they were settled at the kitchen table, each with their tea in front of them, her aunt took her hand in hers.
“What I’m about to tell you is going to be painful and shocking. Are you sure you want hear this?”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” Possibly it was having made love to Nathaniel, Parker, and Markus earlier that gave her the strength to know that regardless of what her aunt told her, she would be okay.
Her aunt nodded and took a deep breath before she began. “Your mother met a man from another Coven who was here visiting friends. His name was Maurice and she fell in love with him at first sight. He was very handsome, and it wasn’t long before everyone knew they were meant for one another. About a month or so after Maurice arrived, his brother came for a visit. What your mother didn’t know was that the brothers had always planned to bond together.”
Her aunt stopped to take a sip of her tea. Amber waited, sensing her aunt’s anxiety.
When she was ready to continue, she said, “It didn’t take long for Maurice to introduce your mother to his brother who was every bit as taken with your mother as Maurice. He made it known that he wanted to bond with your mother, too.”
“My mother was in love with Maurice’s brother, too?”
“Actually, dear, your mother was only in love with one man, your father—your real father—and that was Maurice.”
“Oh my God,” Amber said, her head reeling. She brought her hand to her mouth, stunned by her aunt’s revelation. “That means that…”
“Edgar’s not your father.”
“I thought that you were going to tell me that my mother got pregnant by an Outsider, my father. It made sense to me that they had both hoped I wouldn’t be like my mother, and when they knew I was they rejected me.”
“I can see why you may have thought that. But the man you thought was your father, Edgar, he wasn’t an Outsider. He was Maurice’s brother.”
“He’s a Witch, too?” Amber felt sick to her stomach. Never in a hundred years would she have ever thought Edgar was a Witch. It made everything he and her mother had done to her ten times worse. He knew what she was, what she would become, and he had made her suffer for it.
“Yes. But when he left here with your mother, he turned his back on everything, even his own family.”
“I don’t understand. What happened to my real father?”
“Your mother had no use for Edgar. She was willing to come between the two brothers, and that was her undoing as well as theirs.”
“She made my father chose between her and his brother.”
“Yes, and in the end Maurice chose your mother. We all warned her she was making a mistake, and that she and Maurice needed to talk to Edgar, but they were young and stupid and took the cowards’ way out. He and your mother left Justine Falls one night, leaving your grandmother and grandfathers to tell Edgar. Edgar was beside himself and blamed Nana for encouraging them. She hadn’t, of course, but in his mind he thought your grandmother had never liked him.”
Amber’s eyes widened. “Let me guess. My fath—I mean, Edgar found them, didn’t he?”
“More than a year went by, and no one heard a word from them. Maurice and Edgar’s family came from somewhere in California, and a month or so after Maurice and your mother disappeared, Edgar went back home. He was crushed and devastated. He had lost his brother and the woman that he had thought he and his brother would take as their wife.
“When I finally saw your mother again, she was at Nana’s, holding you in her arms, and she was alone. I’m sorry to tell you this, Amber”—her aunt hesitated—“but Maurice had killed himself. Your mother said he had been despondent over what they had done and had simply flown out over the ocean until he was too tired to fly any further. A small fishing boat had picked up his body the next day.”
“And that’s when my mother brought me back to Justine Falls and to Nana.”
“Yes. And I think she would have stayed, except that once your father’s family had been told he was dead, Edgar came back looking for your mother. He still wanted her regardless of the fact that she had his brother’s baby. I knew that no matter what he said he had to blame your mother for his brother’s death, and that her being with him would be a terrible mistake. Nana felt it, too, and knew he would only bring her unhappiness. I think your mother knew it, too. But she was so devastated over your father, she just didn’t care. I believe she blamed herself for Maurice’s death and went with Edgar as punishment.”
“Why didn’t anyone stop her?” Amber all but cried.
“The family begged your mother not to go away with him. But she wouldn’t hear anything anyone had to say. According to Nana, she wrapped you up and took off one morning before breakfast. Nana asked her to leave you, but Edgar was adamant that you go with them. He knew Nana’s heart was breaking, and I believe that gave him a great deal of satisfaction.
“Nana should have fought for me,” Amber said angrily. “She knew Edgar was sick.”
“She couldn’t. You weren’t her child. She had to abide by your mother’s wishes.”
“The Witches way, right?” Amber said with an edge of insincerity.
“Someday you’ll understand. As much as she wanted to intervene, it wasn’t her place. Life has to play out as intended.”
“Edgar was a cold, cruel man and no matter what he did to my mother or me, she wouldn’t leave him. If it was punishment she was looking for, she got her wish.”
She watched her aunt’s eyes fill up with tears. “I’m so very sorry, Amber.”
“He hated me.” Amber said. “I think my mother hated me, too.”
“She loved Maurice and I know she loved you. When Maurice died, something inside her died, too.”
Amber shook her head. “I was nothing but a pawn in their twisted game of revenge.”
“Your mother wouldn’t have given you that slip of paper with Nana’s address if she hadn’t wanted you to know who you really are. She knew the family would welcome you with open arms.”
“She did do that,” Amber admitted.
“She also opened her mind to let Nana know to expect you. She had never tried to make contact with her before.”
Her aunt squeezed her hand.
“For all she knows, I could have ended up dead on the side of the road.”
“Yes, she knows you’re okay. Nana sent her thoughts her way. She felt your mother’s happiness that you had found us.”
“Couldn’t my father—” She corrected herself. “I mean Edgar, feel her thoughts, too?”
“He could, but it sounds like he’s so wrapped up in being a preacher and not being a Witch he erected walls that would prevent that from happening.”
“Let’s hope so. He’s so angry and full of hate. If he knew I was here, who knows what he would do to my mother.”
“We had ho
ped in time that his unhappiness would fade, but it doesn’t appear that it has or ever will. If only your mother could stop torturing herself and come back to us. We would welcome her back.”
Amber stood up. She had wanted to know, and now that she did, she felt sick that her mother had allowed Edgar to abuse and to believe he was her father. If she had known he wasn’t her real father, it would have made it easier to understand why he didn’t care for her. Instead she had believed he own father couldn’t stand the sight of her.
“How could Nana have kept this from me? She must have realized that I would eventually find out. So many people here in Justine Falls know the truth. No wonder my returning was such a topic of conversation. I’ve been such a fool.”
“Don’t feel like that. She was only trying to give you time to embrace your new family and learn about us first. She didn’t want to burden you with too much too quick.
It suddenly occurred to Amber that if everyone knew, then surely Nathaniel, Markus, and Parker knew, too. How could they profess to love her and not tell her the truth?
“Nana knew that no one would tell you outside the family. The Coven Elders would have never allowed it. This is family business.”
“Is there any other family business I should be told about? I’m all ears.” Amber knew she shouldn’t take out her unhappiness on her aunt. She had begged her for the information. It wasn’t her fault.
“No. Please don’t be angry.”
“I’m not angry, I’m just in shock, I guess. And I’m really not hungry. I think I’ll go to my room. Tell Uncle Pete I’m tired.”
“I’ll have to tell him the truth, Amber.”
“Do what you must.
“I shouldn’t have told you,” her aunt said in tears.
“I’m not sorry you told me, and you shouldn’t be either. I needed to know and I’m grateful you at least had the guts to tell me. I’ll never forget that you did. You’re the only one who respected me enough to tell me the truth.”
“We all love you, Amber. No one wanted to hurt you.”
Her aunt followed her as she left the kitchen. “Amber?”
She turned slowly and smiled for her aunt’s sake. “It’s okay. You did the right thing.”
Chapter Nine
Amber stood outside the church that had been as much a home to her as her parents’ house, and maybe more since at least there, when her father wasn’t angry with her, he had seemed almost happy—or at least the man she had thought was her father. She took a moment to compose herself. She hadn’t seen her mother in months, and if her instincts were correct, she wouldn’t want to see her daughter now either.
Patiently, she watched from down the street for her mother and Edgar, as she had now begun to think of him. They should be arriving at the church shortly. It was Friday, and if they stayed true to their schedule, her mother would use the morning to make sure the church was in order for the weekend and her father would leave soon after to do errands. She only hoped that her mother would remain alone in the church without one of the other churchwomen stopping by to help her.
She felt guilty as she imaged how her aunt would react when she realized her niece wasn’t in her room. She had left a short note that said she had some business to take care of and not to worry. She had left before dawn, so her aunt may not have even seen her note yet. This was something she had to do and she knew if she had told her aunt she would have tried to stop her.
Within a half hour, she saw Edgar pull up outside the church with her mother. They walked into the building together. Fifteen minutes later, Edgar walked out the side door and got in his car. When he had driven away, she walked quickly to the door he had exited from and opened it. She immediately was assailed by the smell of books and polished wood. A church had a smell that reminded her of a library. For a moment, she almost lost her nerve, but now that she knew her mother’s secrets, she felt she had a right to ask her why she had allowed her only child to be subjected to a man who hated her instead of leaving her with a family that would have given her the love and guidance she had needed so badly and been denied.
Everything looked the same as she walked quietly by her father’s office and glanced in, relieved that her mother wasn’t there. She never wanted to step foot in that room again. Working for him had been difficult and demeaning. Her nerves were on edge as she continued down the corridor and up the steps to the small landing that led to the altar. She could see her mother polishing and arranging the various artifacts that she and her father took such care to make sure were in perfect condition. She wished they had cared as much about her.
Her mother’s back stiffened as she turned and met Amber’s eyes. Her look was one of shocked surprise, but there was also anger in the set of her mouth and the flash in her eyes.
“What are you doing here?”
“I had to see you.”
“I thought I told you I never wanted to see you again.”
“I know what you said,” Amber said, taking a step closer to her mother, who took a step back. “But there’s so much you didn’t tell me—things I want to hear from you.”
“Your father will back any minute. I don’t want him to see you.”
“He’s not my father.”
“What do you want from me, Amber?”
“Why did you let me think he was? You knew he hated me.”
“Go home, Amber. Go back to the people that want you. You won’t find your answers here.”
“I’m not leaving until you tell me why you let him hurt me. Why didn’t you leave me in Justine Falls? I should have grown up there with people who loved me and not with you and the man who blames you for his brother’s death and couldn’t stand the sight of me.”
Her mother stiffened, but remained silent as she turned back to her what she had doing.
“Are you going to answer me?” Amber asked, her voice rising.
“We all have our penance, Amber,” her mother said softly, just above a whisper. “You were the product of a love that should have never been.”
Amber closed the distance between them until she was only inches away from her mother. “I know why Edgar hates me, but why do you hate me? I’m your daughter. I’m Maurice’s daughter.”
Her mother turned slowly, her eyes full of unshed tears.
“I loved Maurice. I loved him with all my heart. When you were born, we were so happy, but Maurice couldn’t forgive himself for choosing me over Edgar and your birth wasn’t enough to fill the void and erase the guilt he felt. I thought it would be, but it wasn’t.”
She watched in shock as her mother crumbled to the floor from the sobs that suddenly wracked her body. Amber knelt beside her.
“You loved him,” she said gently, “and you loved me, too.”
Her mother looked up, taking a deep breath, trying to gather herself. She nodded.
“Yes. But when Maurice killed himself, all that love in me was gone. I hated myself for what I had driven him to, and you were a reminder of the love between us that I had destroyed. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t bear the sight of you. I went home to give you to my mother. I knew she would raise you, but Edgar found us and…”
“And what?” Amber asked.
“I knew I was destined to be with him, that I deserved to be with him. That I should have never rejected him.”
“You had to know that he wanted nothing more than to punish you.”
“Yes. I knew that, and that’s what I wanted, too. I didn’t want to take you with us, but he wouldn’t hear of leaving you behind. He knew as long as you were with me, I would never be free of the guilt of what I had done. You were a constant reminder to both of us that I had taken Maurice from him.”
“So you sacrificed me, too,” Amber said dully.
“I was empty of any emotion except self-loathing. I couldn’t think about anything except trying to give Edgar what he wanted. Whatever he did to me or you, in my mind was justified. I had caused him terrible pain and the loss of the broth
er he loved.”
“And he let you,” Amber said in disgust.
“My life belongs to Edgar.”
“You gave him mine too. How could you do that?”
“It was our punishment. We both deserved it. Don’t you see? It was the only way to make up for what happened to Maurice. I was the catalyst for what happened, and you were the product of a union that tore two brothers apart.”
Amber took a step back and just stared at her mother. She was more pathetic than she could have ever imagined. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have come back. You’re a sick woman.”
Her mother looked up from her lap, her eyes once again angry. “So why did you?”
“I guess I hoped that maybe there was something left of you from when you lived in Justine Falls—a piece of you that still existed. I wanted to find my mother.”
A deep voice rumbled from behind them. “That woman no longer exists.”
Both she and her mother turned toward the back of the church where the man she had lived in fear of most of her life strode toward them, his eyes fierce with hatred and focused on Amber.
“You dare to come back here,” he said, towering over Amber and her mother. “And you”—his eyes flashed to her mother—“you’re pathetic. Sitting here crying in front of her as you bear your twisted soul. I should beat you both.”
“Edgar, please,” her mother whimpered. “I’m sorry. I just wanted her to understand so she would go away for good this time.”
“You fool. You sent her back to them, didn’t you?”
Amber watched in horror as Edgar’s palm connected with her mother’s cheek, causing her head to snap backward.
“Stop!” Amber cried out as she stood up and grabbed at his shirt, but he threw her off him like she weighed nothing. She landed on the floor with a thud. The wind had been knocked out of her as she gasped for air.
“You little bitch,” he screamed from above her. “How dare you touch me with those filthy hands of yours?”
“Edgar, please,” her mother said weakly, rising to her feet, holding her cheek. “She’s leaving.”
Bewitched by Three (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting) Page 7