“You can’t,” she said quietly. “Please, don’t.”
Odin had never seen the Valkyrie beg before. It had the opposite effect to what she likely hoped for.
“Leave!” he roared before turning and marching away from her before he lost his resolve and allowed the mess of their love to continue.
Chapter 12: HELGI
Helgi felt desolation after Kara left. It was like his whole world had fallen apart. To make matters worse, he wasn’t even sure why she had left. Kara had seemed troubled recently as if she knew something he didn’t. Helgi couldn’t work out what could be wrong, only that she seemed suddenly preoccupied with his conflict with Hromundr. That she wanted him to give up on the man who had caused his family such grief. And, even though Helgi sometimes wished his honour didn’t see him pushed further into conflict, how could he not avenge his brother’s death? Especially since he had the magic of the Valkyries on his side.
“Are we ready?” Helgi asked, turning to the man next to him. Helgi didn’t even know his name, except that this was the only way he could think of to contact Kara.
The man nodded, his eyes still to the front. Then, Helgi heard the shout of a single word.
“Attack!”
Helgi roared forward, determined to find Kara, that was his only mission. All around him, the ear-splitting sounds of clashing metal and dying men could be heard. It always happened so quickly, yet it continued to surprise him. Without even giving thought to the fact Kara was likely not protecting him today, not using her magic to his advantage, Helgi rushed through the crowd, trying to find the area where the largest concentration of death was occurring.
“Kara!” He yelled out her name, hoping she would hear him. But, more importantly, he hoped she would listen to him, and contact him. Whipping his head from side to side, Helgi tried to take in the entire battle all at once. To the left of him was a fierce struggle going on between two men who appeared to hold past grudges towards each other. Helgi could hear their curses as they taunted each other and it felt personal. When Helgi looked to the right, more men struggled, a group this time, trying to fight off a man who was taller than the rest of them, an obvious advantage. The man was so large that Helgi wondered if he had giant’s blood or if he was some sort of human and giant blend like Loki’s children were.
But then, a scream behind him pulled him away from that thought and Helgi turned. It was a woman battling, she swung her battle axe from side to side in an attempt to stop the onslaught. Even Helgi could see that she was fighting a losing battle.
Quickly, he rushed forward, determined to help her, not even thinking about his own fate, his own goal in this war that he really knew nothing about.
Helgi had heard about this struggle for a small land parcel while he had been drinking at his village one evening. A messenger was passing through and had news of the surrounding areas. When Helgi heard there was a dispute, the idea had bloomed. He was convinced he would see Kara here today, that it was all it would take in order to speak with her and to sort out their mess.
But now that he was here, he wasn’t so sure. Until he had met Kara at his grandfather’s barrow, he had never seen a Valkyrie during battles and, as Kara explained, that was a good thing because to see one on the battlefield meant certain death.
However, Helgi thought it might be different if it were his Kara. They knew of each other, they had a relationship. Surely that would count for something.
Another scream from the woman, this one cut short with a gurgle. Helgi stopped in his tracks and watched as the poor shield maiden fell to her knees, clasping at a gaping wound to her neck. It devastated Helgi that he hadn’t been able to reach her in time, to help her. Still, it didn’t stop him from glancing around her to see if he could see any Valkyries approaching.
“Kara!”
The dying woman looked up at him like he had spoken her own name and Helgi frowned at her. Then, he saw her falling forward, landing face first into the bloody grime of the battleground. Someone ran over the top of her and she was instantly forgotten in this battle. She was simply another person lost to the spoils of war and Helgi didn’t even know if he was grieving for someone who was on the side he was fighting for or not.
“Kara!” he repeated his lover’s name over and over as he ran through the fray. Occasionally, he found the need to swing his axe as men attacked him. However, he was able to avoid much of the conflict merely by skirting around the edges of it.
“Go, Helgi,” a willowy voice said as it drifted in on the wind. Helgi froze, listening intently for Kara to speak once more. “Go now, I cannot protect you for much longer.”
“I will not leave until you speak to me!” Helgi roared into the crowd, not caring if anyone noticed him speaking to the air. “I need to see you, Kara, I need to know why you left me!”
“You need to leave now, Helgi. The gods are asking me to take you and I don’t want to have to do that. You know what will become of us if you die here today. I cannot bear to be in love with a man who is the shell of his former self. Please, I beg of you, leave this mess far behind you.”
Her voice wavered on the air, as fragile as the wisps of smoke coming from the mouths of the men struggling on the field. He tried to work out where her words were coming from but they appeared to echo around him like she was speaking from every place at once.
“No,” Helgi insisted, his words coming out much stronger, more definitely than hers. “I will not leave until you see me.”
He dropped his weapon and fell to his knees. “I will die here today or you will speak to me. Either way, I am not leaving the field. It’s your decision, Kara.”
Helgi bowed his head and waited for death to take him. He didn’t want to die like this, he had his brother to avenge. However, he couldn’t imagine his life without Kara either, not now that she had left him so suddenly.
“Please, Helgi,” her voice whimpered and it sounded like she was whispering the words directly into his ear. Turning his head, Helgi expected to see his lover crouched next to him but the space was devoid of her presence.
He waited patiently until there was another huff of her breath next to him. “Fine, I will meet with you but you must leave here now.”
Helgi smiled at his victory.
Chapter 13: KARA
Kara sat by Helgi’s barrow, her whole being still in shock. She had never imagined Helgi would force her hand like that. But he’d had no choice, she realised that now. How else would he contact her?
She ran her fingers through the short grass of Helgi’s barrow, hoping her own Helgi would know to meet her here. It was too risky to say the words out loud for the gods to hear, for Odin to witness.
Even if she had wanted to speak of where Helgi should meet her, she hadn’t time to speak to him once he lifted his weapon and attempted to flee the battlefield. Instead, Kara had to fight against the tides surging against Helgi, the march of death that was approaching him so quickly.
As soon as she spoke the words, the ones that saw a chance of reconciliation between them, Helgi had turned and ran as fast as a steed, like Fenrir himself was chasing him down and made his way through the crowded field. Somehow, he seemed to know he had been risking his own life by being there, that to try to speak to her some more would threaten his own existence. She had watched as he swung his axe, taking out people from both sides of the conflict as he tried to escape.
As he ran, Kara could feel Odin’s breath behind her. He was trying his hardest to disperse her magic, to teach poor Helgi a lesson that would cost him his life and to breathe life into the threat he had promised.
But Kara didn’t look back once to see how close Odin was. For, to do that, would be to break her own spell. Instead, she had hoped her sisters were supporting her, were doing their own best to keep Odin at bay. She would likely pay for this sort of insolence later—they all would. However, Kara didn’t care. A world without Helgi was not one that she planned to stay in. She now understood why her past liv
es had done as they did and gave up their earthly existence rather than spend a near eternity without love. Kara hadn’t allowed the knot in her throat to unravel with a haggard breath until he was free of the battlefield and as safe from the clutches of the gods as any mortal could be on Midgard.
“Kara!” The sound of Helgi’s voice made her body shiver. She closed her eyes to fight back the surge of tears threatening before turning. Opening her eyes, she took in the sight of the only man she would ever love.
“Helgi!” She rushed forward, throwing her arms around him and kissing him fervently. Helgi did the same back to her, his strong hands lifting her high and she tangled her fingers through his hair, pulling him closer to her.
“My sweet Kara,” Helgi finally said, when he broke from their embrace. “Oh, how I have missed you.”
Kara smiled at him, her face wet with tears. “I have missed you too.”
“Please, I don’t know what I did wrong, but I want you to know that I will fix it, I will do whatever it takes to make this right between us.”
Kara’s smile dipped and she remembered their argument with clarity. “You can’t fix it,” she said, bowing her head. “We just have to march onwards now.”
Helgi stared at her, his brow furrowing slightly as if he didn’t understand her words. “What do you know that I don’t?”
“I can’t tell you,” Kara said, her hand reaching up to trace a scar on his beautiful face. “You wouldn’t understand.”
Helgi leaned into her touch and her heart ached for him. There had to be some way to fix this mess. But she feared the worst now that Odin was involved, now that they had meddled and riled him.
“Then, I don’t want to know what it is,” Helgi finally said and leaned in to kiss her.
Kara kissed him back, fearful that this might be the very last time they would be together, that their love was as doomed as their previous lives. What good was being reborn if you were fated to suffer like this? Suddenly, Kara wished their lives had not been so tangled or drawn together in a way that saw them endlessly ripped apart.
Somehow, Kara had to work out a way to keep Helgi alive, or she would die trying once more.
Chapter 14: HELGI
Helgi could see the sadness around Kara as if it were a physical barrier between them. The misery shrouded her and it broke Helgi’s heart. He had no idea why she was so distraught and while he said he hadn’t wanted to know, it now ate away at him.
“Tell me what it is,” Helgi whispered and he watched as Kara froze. “I need to know.”
She looked at him, her gaze open and Helgi couldn’t work out whether she was about to reveal anything or not.
“I don’t want you to be so sad anymore,” Helgi continued. “I just want to fix this mess. I don’t care how bad it is, even if it means the death of me, I need to know.”
A single tear ran down her cheek as he said those words and Helgi knew the reason for her desolation now.
“How do we fix this then?” he asked, reaching out and clasping her hands between his own. Bringing them to his lips, he kissed her knuckles.
Kara shook her head. “I don’t know,” she whispered.
“Surely, your magic will work?” Helgi asked, no longer prompting her for the finer details. Kara gave a brief smile so bitter that Helgi wanted to cry as well.
“I believe my magic would anger Odin even more than he is now.”
Helgi nodded resolutely. “Perhaps we need to push him further then? If he is already angry, how much worse can it get?”
Helgi was shocked at his words, surprised he was strong enough to even say them. He was talking about bringing Odin’s ire down on his head and he hadn’t even considered how much this could go wrong or how terrible it could be.
Kara looked at him, her wide-eyed gaze studying him. “You don’t know what your words mean.”
“Well, I know how it would feel not to have you anymore,” he replied. “So, Odin’s irritation no longer concerns me.”
She nodded. Although, Helgi wasn’t sure she was agreeing with him. “Perhaps, you are right. I couldn’t imagine being without you either and I am not about to give up without a fight.” A grim smile briefly crossed her lips. “Let’s do this.”
And so, they decided to march ever forward, to accept the fates given to them. To do so would likely see the gods angry at them. However, Helgi couldn’t care less about what they thought of him. He just wanted to continue on with loving Kara. And, if that was not what the future held for him, well, he’d rather be dead anyway.
Finally, revenge for the death of his brother seemed inconsequential.
Chapter 15: HELGI
Helgi approached the village cautiously. He had sent a messenger on ahead to announce his arrival but he had never met the two kings named Haldingr and was uncertain of their reputation or hospitality.
Glancing surreptitiously around him, Helgi noted that the township was well established. There appeared to be a level of wealth here that boded well for his request.
“Excuse me,” Helgi asked a woman passing by. “Can you lead me to the king’s longhouse?”
The woman had scoffed at him and nodded her head down the path he was following. “It’s down there.”
Helgi thanked the rude woman and continued on his journey, finally locating the large building.
Men were positioned outside. They wore light protection and each had a dagger at their waist.
“I am Helgi the Valiant and am here to see Haldingr and Haldingr,” Helgi said and the men stared at him. “I sent a messenger earlier.”
“Ah, yes,” one of the men finally replied. “Let me escort you through.”
Helgi followed the tall guard, getting his first glimpse of the royal longhouse. On each side of the building were many platforms that could be used for seats or bedding, depending on the requirement at the time. The platforms were currently covered with folded furs that were finely manufactured. Along each wall hung decorative cloths and the beams holding the roof up were intricately engraved with images.
“Helgi!” He looked up at his name being called and saw the two kings. Both were blonde but that was where their similarities stopped. One was short and squat while the other was taller, thinner and obviously much older than the first king.
Helgi approached and bowed at the men. “I am here to join your attack against Hromundr. I bring my own fleet with me.”
The kings nodded at Helgi before each casting a gaze at the other. “Please, sup with us and tell me why you want to help us,” one of the Haldingr’s said.
The other king raised his hand at a slave and food and ale was brought in for Helgi to feast upon. He accepted graciously, sitting down on the platform level with the kings and complimenting them on their fine food.
There was silence for a while as they all partook of the food and ale. It allowed Helgi time to be lost in his own thoughts, to wonder if it was madness to follow through with retribution. However, both he and Kara had decided to allow their fates to unfold as they should, to see what was destined for them. And, in their world, the only thing to be had regarding Helgi’s future was to search until he found Hromundr. Then, he would kill him.
If it unfolded that way, good and well. If it didn’t, then he and Kara would start their lives anew, as they always did. Kara had been unsure about Helgi wanting to pursue Hromundr. But, what difference would it make? They had no control over their own destinies anyway. He didn’t want to die, to have to be reborn and find Kara all over again. However, it was their only chance at happiness. It seemed like their lives were already ruined this time around and it was better to be doomed to die only because it meant they could live again.
Finally, the stouter Haldingr interrupted Helgi’s sombre thoughts. “So, tell me why you suddenly want to join with our forces. We haven’t heard much about you before now and can’t see why you would want to involve yourself with our quarrel.”
“I seek retribution against Hromundr,” Helgi answered.
“He slaughtered my brother and I have vowed to kill him. To join forces with your army would give me great pleasure.”
The thin king picked up a hunk of meat and chewed it thoughtfully before contributing to the conversation. “I like a man who is honest about his behaviour. You could have tried to talk up how you want fame or to join in my victory hoping to claim some of the glory for your own. And, we would have known that wasn’t true since you’ve come from far away and have never been involved in our conflicts before. So, I would be happy for you to join with us, especially with your own fleet. While we consider it an easy win against Hromundr, the more one has on their side, the better it is in the end.”
“I also have the magic of the Valkyrie called Kara on my side,” Helgi added. “She will assist me greatly in this battle, as she has in previous conflicts.”
“I have heard of this Kara, Helgi the Valiant,” the older king replied. “She would certainly be a welcome addition.”
They all nodded at that reply and Helgi smiled into his ale as he plotted the death of Hromundr rather than think about the doomed fate of his love.
Chapter 16: KARA
Kara paced the great halls of Valhalla. She was nervous, terrified, in fact. She had avoided Freya and Odin prior to the battle in which Helgi was determined to kill Hromundr. Her shoulders ached as they tightened with stress. She knew Helgi was not safe down there, that the gods were determined to bring about the end of their cycle of death and rebirth.
However, what she didn’t know was whether she could stop it all. She was determined to try, though. It was the only defence they had against their predestined fates. Her magic was strong, she had no doubt of that.
While Helgi was happy to let their fates unfold as intended, Kara was not as pessimistic. She wanted to fight against their destinies, to kick and scream at the fates in order to change their minds. And she hoped that the deeds presented in this upcoming battle would help to sway their decision.
The Breaker of Curses (Valkyrie Secrets Book 3) Page 5