by Lee Miller
A blinding light hit Sara in the eyes. She couldn’t see anything, but she kept moving forward towards it. She stumbled forward and tucked herself in as she landed on her back. The light had reached an intensity she couldn’t stand and she had to close her eyes. After a few minutes, she could tell the light was fading in brightness. She opened her eyes again, but everything was fuzzy, she hadn’t quiet adjusted to the brightness yet. She blinked a few times and was amazed at how her eyes felt like she just woke up from a long sleep. Everything in the room was quiet except for the sound of some strange machinery she couldn’t quiet place. She felt like she laid there forever trying to get adjusted. After a few more blinks her eyes adjusted enough to see what appeared to be lights in a ceiling. The kind of opaque plastic textured case over fluorescent light bulbs you see in office buildings. She closed her eyes again and opened them once more. This time a face was leaning over her. It too, was blurry but slowly came into focus. It was a face she’d know anywhere. It was the face she loved more than anything on this earth. “Hi.” she weakly got out. She was suddenly aware to other sounds in the room. People talking in hushed but hurried whispers, the distinct smell of antiseptic, the sound of someone’s clothing rubbing against a cloth seat. She also heard the annoying whirling and beeping of the machinery that she couldn’t place. She tried to lift her head but found she had no strength. She wheeled her eyes around trying to take in as much as possible. She felt she needed to move and that she was in danger, but she couldn’t imagine why. As her vision cleared, so did her other senses and she could tell she was in a hospital bed and the strange machine noises where plugged into her. “Oh man!” came a voice Sara was familiar with, but she had no idea why. “You gave us a nasty scare Mrs. Connelly.” There was some rustling around in the room; there were other voices present. “She’s stabilizing. Blood pressure and respiratory returning to normal.” “Good job Dr. Morgan! You’ve brought her back!” said a voice Sara thought sounded a bit too cheerful. “No, all the credit is hers. She had to fight for it; I just gave her the ability to do so.” the strangely familiar voice she assumed was Dr. Morgan responded. Sara really didn’t care to see anyone else who maybe in the room, or care why she was even here. She just wanted to look into that face again. “Chris?” she let out weakly. “I’m here Sara, I told you I’d never leave your side.” She heard his voice come from her right side. “Yes, these two have scarcely left your side in the year you’ve been in here.” Dr. Morgan said with a light chuckling. “These ‘two’?” Sara questioned. “Yes. Your husband and your best friend, Beth.” Sara turned her head enough to see Beth was sitting in a chair near the window. Her anxious face had tears streaming out of her eyes and she let out a laugh of relief. Sara was somehow stricken with joy not just at seeing Sara and Chris, but also at the beautiful golden rays of the sun bathing the city below a clear azure sky. She found the scene very remarkable and offered a sense of peace. The dream she had been having before waking up was slipping away quickly. She had almost forgotten what it was about, but at this point, she didn’t really care. She was happy to be with Chris and Beth again. She was inexplicably happy to see a blue sky and sun again.
Sara looked back towards Chris. “What happen? Why am I here?” she asked through a cracked voice. Chris looked over to the doctor with concern. “How much should we tell her Doc?” He asked. Dr. Morgan looked at Chris then studied Sara for a few moments. “What all do you remember exactly Mrs. Connelly?” he asked, concern etched on his face. Sara responded without hesitation, though she had no idea where the word came from. “I remember Gray.” Dr. Morgan’s face went from concern to startle. “Gray? As in the color?” He asked. Trying to get more from her. “Yes.” She said quietly. “I remember a lot of gray.” The puzzled and frustrating look on her face must have convinced the doctor that she was strong enough to hear the truth. He looked at Chris and nodded. “Keep in mind, I’m going to be keeping an eye on her vitals. If this gets to be too much, you’ll have to stop. If she slips back into a coma, there is no telling when she’ll emerge again.” he warned. Chris looked at the doctor and nodded, then looked at his wife lying in the hospital bed she had been in for the last year. “What do you remember from New Year’s Eve?” he asked gently. Immediately seeing recognition shoot across her face. Sara recited everything she could remember, even acknowledged gaps in her memory. “I remember us standing there, we had just gotten back from the party and were making out just inside the door. Then a gunman appeared from the laundry room and interrupted us. It took me a bit, but I remember recognizing that it was Tommy, Beth’s fiancé.” Sara looked over at Beth who was still sitting there quietly, her face stricken with guilt and grief. “Beth, it’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known.” Sara said reaching for the woman’s hand. “I know, but I’m still sorry that all of this happened to you. Neither of you deserved this. In the last year, I’ve dealt with it. I’ve gotten over it, gotten over Tommy.” She looked over at Dr. Morgan and smiled. “With some help from old and new friends.” She added. Sara could sense there was something more here than just friends, but she wasn’t going to pry. “I remember the flash of the gun but it made no noise. Then…” Sara stopped, her memory fuzzy. She saw it like she was looking through gossamer. “Then I fought him. Didn’t I?” her mind was muddled. She couldn’t make anything match up. “Everything is so blurry. I can’t remember what happen next. She looked to Chris and he saw she was beginning to panic. “It’s okay love. What you can’t remember, I can. Dr. Morgan says it’s common for coma patients to transpose things around them and create their own reality from it.” Dr. Morgan stepped in at this point. “Like when I asked you a bit ago what you remember, you said Gray. Lots of Gray.” The doctor looked at her with a puzzled expression. “Where did you get that idea from Sara?” She looked at the Doctor as if seeing him for the first time, yet he still looked very familiar to her. Without thinking, Sara responded as if reciting a memory she couldn’t quite cling to. “Life is white, and Death is black. Those that are neither are in the gray. An in between.” Her focus returned to the present. Everyone in the room was looking at her, the doctor and Chris with astonishment and Beth with bewilderment. “Funny. That is a conversation Chris and I had in this very room just a few months ago, yet you remembering even that small part is remarkable!” Sara tried to focus again, tried to remember anything else, but she was stymied. Nothing came. Chris sat down on the bed, gave her a kiss on the forehead and said, not for the first time in their lives together, “Let me help my dear Sara.” And he filled in the missing pieces. After Tommy had shot Sara, Chris rushed him, he tried to fire the gun twice more but it only clicked. He and Tommy fought all the way upstairs were Chris was able to get the better of him and send him to the street below and to his death. Chris then turned everything over to the police; Tony Diego was arraigned on multiple charges to include first-degree murder and attempted murder. His trial wrapped up a little over a month ago and he was given the death penalty. He refused appeals and in one of the most historic turn of events, his execution was to take place today, at 11:59 PM. In just a couple of hours. Sara noticed for the first time that the TV in her room was on and muted. It was on one of the local news stations, she assumed they had been counting down to the execution of the man who tried to have her killed. Chris continued; “We got you to the hospital and Dr. Morgan and his team did emergency brain surgery on you. It was touch and go for a while, but you pulled through it and you’ve been in a coma ever since. Chris looked at Sara as if seeing her for the first time. Sara grew a little self-conscious. She imagined she probably wasn’t looking her best. She had no idea what she must look like. Getting shot in the head must alter things a bit, but she didn’t care though. She was alive and Chris was here with her. Whatever life threw at them, she knew they would be able to handle it. She would always count today as her second birthday. Her second lease on life and she planned to make the most of it. Chris surprised her by kneeling at her bed and taking her hand in his. �
�Now, if you’ll do me the honor, I have a promise to keep. I made a deal with God that if he spared you, I would do anything. He did and I have been attending church here at the hospital’s chapel ever since. Would you pray with me?” Sara looked at him in awe. “You joined the faith?” she asked. “Boy did he ever!” Beth replied, chuckling. “He has even gotten me and Dr. Morgan to start. The man is persistent!” Sara was overcome. She had no words. She bowed her head, and began to pray with her husband.
Epilogue – The Second Year
The night Sara began to live was the night Tony Diego ceased to. She was happy to see her looks hadn’t changed at all. Vain, she knew, but it had more to do with not having to see a reminder of what evil others could do to you. Over the next couple of months she threw herself head long into rehab. She hated not being able to take care of herself and she worked to fix that. Her team of doctors were very impressed with her diligence. The finale prognoses came, Sara may suffer short term memory loss, but all the test conclude, she would have as close to a full recover as possible. Sara couldn’t wait till her hair grew back; she hated seeing the ugly scar that having her head cut open had left. She and Chris worked day and night to get her back on her feet. She was never alone. Either Chris or Beth was always with her. Nighttime was the worst. Her dreams were vivid and her nightmares to realistic. Dr. Morgan told her they would fade in time. The brain had weird ways of dealing with things; it was one of the organs that science knew the least about. After about 3 months, they finally released her from the hospital. Chris had begun talking about selling the apartment and moving somewhere else, but Sara didn’t want to move. “That apartment is our home, and nobody; alive or dead, is going to run us out of it.” She was adamant about this. The drive across town seemed to take forever. The mid-day traffic was horrible. Sara looked out her window into the deepest blue sky she could ever remember seeing, she had a flash of a memory of when that sky didn’t look so friendly. She remembered when gnarling deep gray clouds blanketed the city. Then the memory was gone before she could really get a fix on it. She felt a slight sense of vertigo and turned her attention back towards the windshield. “If that’s what you want, then we’ll stay where we are at. I don’t want to take your home away from you.” Chris was focusing on the traffic in front of him, but Sara could hear the concern in his voice. “Chris, wherever you are is home. I just don’t see a need to move out. Of course, it’ll take some adjusting, but I’ll be fine.”
Life returned to some resemblance of normalcy. After another month or so of her getting settled back into the house, and when Chris felt she was strong enough to take care of herself, he returned to work. At first working half days, and then eventually full days. Sara’s strength returned slowly but surly. She got back on the treadmill and her daily routine of running, she kept up with the physical therapy. As the anniversary of her opening her eyes closed in, Sara felt like she was back to her old self again. In the last couple of months, she had even returned to the dojo that was at one time her second home.
New Year’s Eve was approaching and she wanted to look good for Chris. This would be her first official outing since being shot almost two years ago. She wanted her life back and she had worked hard over the last year to attain that. She and Beth went dress shopping a few days before the party. “So, question. You, uh. Well.” Sara knew Beth had an important question to ask her, she had been expecting it for a while now. “Yes Beth?” Sara asked, looking as innocent as she could. She didn’t want to give away that she already had a good idea of what was up. She wasn’t blind to the fact that Beth and Dr. Morgan had grown close over the year she slept and even closer since she opened her eyes again. “Well, I was just wondering.” Beth continued as she messed with the strap on one of the dresses Sara had being eyeing. “Should we be looking at a dual purpose dress for this coming party? Or will we need to go dress shopping for a separate Maid of Honor dress in the future?” Beth looked up to judge Sara’s response and Sara looked up to see the wicked little smile on her best friend’s face. Sara couldn’t contain her excitement but she curbed it until she knew this was really what Beth wanted. “Are you sure Beth? I know you and Chase had gotten close when I was in the hospital, but it’s only been two years since…” Sara let the thought trail off, she didn’t really want to bring up the Tommy stuff again, but she wanted to make sure Beth was happy, that Doc was the right guy. Beth fiddled with the hem of a dress she had taking a liking to. “I know what you mean.” She said. “It has been two years and Chase and I have been dating for about a year of that. I came to grips early on with what Tommy did and who he really ways. From the very beginning my biggest concern was you, not him. He made his choice; you didn’t choose what happen to you. Chase has been very good to me, and yes, I can totally see spending the rest of my life with him. If I could have your blessing.” Sara saw that Beth had put a lot of thought into this. “When did he ask you?” she inquired. “Last week. I told him I couldn’t give him an answer until I talked to you. He completely understood.” “This is what you truly want?” Sara had to make sure. She loved this woman and would destroy anyone who hurt her. She had been through enough with Tommy. “Yes Sara, it is.” Sara could detect the sincerity in Beth’s voice. “Well then, I say we go shopping again for the right dress once you’ve picked out the colors.” Beth jumped for joy and threw her arms around Sara’s neck. “Sweeeeet! I’m going to need your help planning the perfect wedding!” The two women laughed and hugged each other. Sara was content that the rest of her life was falling into place. She would return back to work after the holidays. She was amazed to find out her editor held her job for her. She already had an assignment she was going to start working on.
Sara walked out of the store and into the world that contained the rest of her life; she walked out and gazed up at the sky. A single snowflake descended from above and landed on the tip of her nose. She crossed her eyes so she could watch it sizzle on her warm flesh. With a soft sign, it was gone and had absorbed into her skin. She looked back into the sky as the flurries began and laughed. “The sun will come out again someday.” she told herself, and walked home to get ready for the party and the rest of the days to come.
THE END
Acknowledgments
First and foremost I want to thank God. For without him, I am nothing. Any talent I possess comes from his good graces and I honor that. I want to thank my Lord and Savior for the blood he shed for me.
My Mom and Dad – in 1979 you put your lives on hold and adopted a little boy who had a wealth of issues he was dealing with. You never gave up on me even when I wanted to give up on myself. You have seen me through some of the darkest times of times of my life. No words could ever convey the appropriate amount of love and gratitude I have for you.
A lot of people have shown faith in me over the years. These people have stayed by me through some very rough times. People like that are more valuable than gold.
My girlfriend, Susan – Thanks for embarking on this crazy journey with me. Thank you for all your support and reassuring words. You are simply, amazing.
My children, Cera, Jessica, Sarah, Shelby, Samantha, Zach and Tim - Remember, you are never too old to live your dreams. Never give up and never stop believing in the inherent power of goodness and faith. As I have always said, you are never alone, God and I love you. Never let anyone tell you that you aren’t good enough.
My best friend, Kevin - Brother, you have been by me during some very rough times. You have always encouraged me to keep going and never stop. Your friendship is worth more than you could ever know.
My closes friends, Vince Reed and Paul Watts - When I told you I was writing a book, you didn’t seem surprised at all. You supported me and at times kept me going. Thank you for always being there.
My sister, Tina – During the early years, you were the mom to the rest of us that you shouldn’t have had to be. You kept us alive, you kept us going. I couldn’t have asked for a better older sister. You are one in a millio
n.