“Of course.” She didn’t know he was going to marry. She started to wonder what would become of her when he did, but soon forgot her own plight as he told the sad story of Amanda’s parents.
“My younger brother, Cameron James, married Sarah when he was only twenty-two; she only seventeen. Though both families begged them to wait, they would hear none of it for they were terribly in love.”
He sounded so cynical, she couldn’t help asking, “You don’t believe in love, Mister Westbrooke?” Of course, she didn’t, but often thought herself alone in that regard.
“Yes, Miss Eastman, I believe in love, but not the all-consuming love Sarah had for my brother. There is such a thing as loving someone too much.” He paused and turned to look out the window. she wondered if perhaps he wished for that precious commodity, even as he said he didn’t want it.
“Anyway, within a year of their marriage, Sarah gave birth to a daughter, Amanda. Though the child was born healthy, Sarah was too young, and the birth difficult. She bled to death.” He said the last with such finality, Jaci shivered, thinking how backward medicine must be in this century.
“Cameron, of course, blamed himself for Sarah’s death, and no force on earth could keep him at Wildwood, nor get him to take responsibility for a baby daughter. To allow him time to recover, I gave him control of the family shipping business. That was five years ago. He comes home, but not often. Amanda reminds him of Sarah, and it’s very hard on him.”
“But you would have only been twenty-five; too young for responsibility of that magnitude.”
“As you so eloquently told me that day in the library, sometimes there’s no time for frivolous activities. I had been managing Wildwood since I was twenty.”
Nicholas began to pull on his gloves, and she realized the story had ended. It would seem they shared a common background. She wondered about his family; what kind of parents he had that shaped his personality even now. How strange for Nicholas to allow Cameron to wander the world while he raised his brother’s daughter. As she continued to study the man across from her, she realized Amanda couldn’t have been placed in better hands.
Nicholas was confident, strong, and had a good deal of responsibility on his shoulders. It appeared he had a sincere commitment to family for he saw to Amanda’s needs and protected her, even though that responsibility should be his brother’s. In fact, he provided her the same safety. She sighed, a longing for something more surfacing unbidden to her mind.
“Are you ready, Miss Eastman, or would you rather wait out here? I’ll only be a moment at this first establishment.” When he spoke, Jaci realized the carriage had stopped, and he had already alighted. She had no desire to stay outside in a strange town with no protection. She hurriedly gathered her skirts and scooted across the seat. This time, he held out a hand and she placed hers in the warmth of his gloved one.
“We must remember to buy you some gloves,” he commented as he tucked her hand in the crook of his arm. He led her through a large wooden door into what appeared to be a furniture warehouse.
“Ah, Gustav, how are you?” Nicholas left her side to step forward, shaking the hand of an older, broad chested man.
“Wilkommen, Nicholas,” the man answered in a heavy accent.
Nicholas turned and pulled her forward. “Miss Eastman, I would like you to meet a dear friend of mine, Gustav Dentzel. Perhaps you know of his work?”
“The cabinet and carousel maker, of course,” she replied automatically, nodding at the introduction.
“Oh, my God, that’s it!” she shouted as the connection sank in. Both men backed up in astonishment.
She grabbed the older man’s arm and shook it. “Mister Dentzel, where are your carousels?” Her heart pounded and her palms became damp with the realization she could get back to her own time if she could find the carousel — the Dentzel carousel she had been photographing.
Nicholas, of course, didn’t understand her agitation. “Miss Eastman, please.” To his friend he added, “You’ll have to excuse her, Gustav. She’s newly arrived from the south, much excited to see the city. She tends to forget her manners.” He slanted a meaningful glance toward her, but she ignored him. She was far too excited about getting back to Dallas.
“Ja, ja.” Gustav nodded his head, apparently pleased with Jaci’s interest in his animals. He pulled her by the hand, chattering in German as he led her to a workroom behind the front of the store.
Jaci quickly glanced back to see Nicholas following, a frown on his handsome face. She would miss him, she supposed, but the thought was fleeting. She had found her way home.
Scattered around the workroom in various stages of production were a menagerie of wooden animals. She squealed with delight as Gustav pulled her through the door. She jerked her hand free and raced to the first horse. Nothing happened.
She flitted from shape to shape, touching the horses but ignoring most of the other animals. Each time she touched one, she closed her eyes and held her breath, hoping that would be the horse to transport her back to Dallas and her own life. Each time she opened her eyes, she felt as though a great hand squeezed her throat, making it difficult to breath.
Her steps faltered and she stumbled, but grabbed her long skirts and continued on. There had to be at least one horse in this room that could recreate the magic she needed. She had to find the correct one and get back where she belonged.
She had no idea the strange sight she made; nor did she care. By the time she touched each and every animal several times, tears spiked her lashes. She stood dejected in the center of the workroom, sobs silently shaking her shoulders. When Nicholas touched her arm, she turned into him, burying her face in the soft wool of his coat.
His strong arms wrapped about her, but she could find no comfort there. She knew he couldn’t comprehend her need. She felt him take a breath to ask, but she spoke first, her voice quivering.
“Don’t you see? It was because of the carousel that I came through—” She glanced at Mister Dentzel, whose avid look told her he understood more than his broken English revealed.
“Remember the day I arrived at Wildwood? I was at a carousel, taking photographs.” She knew she wasn’t making any sense, especially since Nicholas didn’t have any idea that she had come through time. “I had just touched the black—”
She turned sharply to Mister Dentzel. “Black; you have a black horse?” She swiveled around, frantically searching the horses again.
“Nein, nein.” The woodcarver scooted in front of her, waving his hands in a negative gesture. “Gustav’s horses are never black. We use only the pretty colors. Look.” He grandly swept a hand toward the horses his workmen were completing. He was right, of course. She scanned the jumpers and steppers, but none of them were black.
Nicholas took her firmly by the arm. “Thank you, Gustav. I am sorry for any inconvenience we may have caused. You will have Amanda’s chest finished by Christmas?”
“Yes, of course, Herr Westbrooke.” Gustav bowed low as Nicholas led her out of the workroom.
She turned to speak, but Nicholas squeezed her elbow in warning.
“Miss Eastman. I would suggest you leave with me quietly.” He spoke in a low voice. “Gustav is a good man, but he may be inclined to think you more than eccentric if you continue to barrage him with questions about some strange horse he does not have.”
She hung her head in defeat. Once inside the carriage, she stared out the window, seeing nothing.
“Miss Eastman?” A pause. “Jaci?”
She turned.
“You can’t return home on a wooden horse.” His tone was light, and Jaci knew he thought to tease her out of her mood.
“Why not? That’s how I got here.” It didn’t matter what she said; she didn’t care what happened.
“Who are you?” This time his voice sounded hollow and haunted. Still, she didn’t have the answer she knew he wanted.
“You can’t possibly understand. I came from another century. I d
on’t know why, or how, except that I’m sure the Dentzel carousel had something to do with it.”
His voice turned brusque. “I believe you hit your head harder than Dr. Stillwell claimed. I probably shouldn’t have brought you to town.”
“It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t have the carousel horse I need.” Totally defeated, she wanted to scream her outrage. She had been positive the horse would work.
An unsettled look crossed his features. “Perhaps I should take you to the doctor again. I’m normally an easygoing person, but you’re spouting nonsense. I do not want you repeating this foolishness in front of Amanda. Do you understand?”
Jaci knew better than to argue. At present, she had no recourse but to accept his charity, and his dictates. It didn’t take a genius to realize she was better off at Wildwood than in a mental hospital, if such institutions even existed in 1874.
She nodded in acceptance.
Nicholas reached behind him to a small door that opened to where the driver sat. “Take us back to Wildwood, Stephen. Miss Eastman has taken ill.”
Chapter Four
Nicholas enjoyed routine and a reasonable certainty about what would happen each day. That was the way it had always been. The arrival of Miss Eastman at Wildwood had disrupted the normal flow of his life, and he wasn’t sure he liked it.
After the incident at Gustav’s, he became even more wary of her. When she had tearfully turned to him in the furniture shop, instead of feeling anger at her strange actions, his desire had steadily risen. She had soft curves which fit him perfectly, and she smelled extremely sweet and feminine.
All in that one suspended moment in time he had wanted to protect her from harm, fix whatever was wrong, and kiss her senseless. Such conflicting emotions had left him frustrated to the point where he had almost lost his temper in the carriage.
Perhaps he shouldn’t have offered her the job as his niece’s governess. He couldn’t let his emotions cloud his thinking where Amanda’s welfare was concerned, and Miss Eastman’s presence definitely did that.
To assure himself he had chosen correctly, he kept a close eye on the governess. He noted her comings and goings, and everything she said to Amanda. As he observed her, he could see no evidence of a recurrence of her strange behavior. Each evening before Amanda went to bed he would sit her on his lap and question her about her day.
“What did the two of you do with yourselves today while I worked the horses?” he asked, knowing he should feel guilty. For Amanda’s sake, however, he had to be sure of Miss Eastman’s mental stability.
“Oh, Uncle Nicholas, Miss Eastman is the most marvelous person. We walked under the trees and she told me a story about why the leaves turn colors.” Amanda snuggled deeper against his chest, and he hugged her tight.
“I will judge if you learned your lesson well. Tell me the story about the leaves.”
Amanda squirmed around to see him better, her face animated. “You see, a very long time ago, when something died, it was put in the sky as a star picture. One picture is of an Indian hunter. I don’t remember his name. Since he was a hunter he still had to hunt in the sky, you know, so a big bear was put up there, too. When the hunter shot the bear, the blood dripped down and turned the leaves red. And when the hunter cooked the bear, its fat splattered all over and turned other leaves yellow.”
“Miss Eastman told you all that? I shall have to speak with her about telling you such lies.”
“Oh, you can’t do that. It’s a—” She screwed up her face in thought. “I don’t remember the word, but it’s a story from long ago. It’s not something that really happened, you see.” She spoke with such sincerity Nicholas almost smiled. In the span of a few short weeks, she had apparently developed quite a fondness for Miss Eastman.
“I believe the word you want is legend, Muffin, and I’m glad you realize the story is pretend. We don’t have Indians in the sky hunting bears anymore.”
Amanda giggled. “I know that, but it does make the bestest story. Tomorrow I will have to find Toby and Travis and tell them.”
Amanda yawned and snuggled closer, and he sat, content to hold her. It amazed him that Cameron didn’t want a family. How could a person not long to share and converse with others, teach them values, and love them?
He recalled the love that had surrounded him and Cameron as they grew up. Even when he rebelled against his father and left home for awhile, his parents had supported his right to venture out on his own. Lately, he had often wished for his mother’s presence; she would have been much better for Amanda than he.
Even with Amanda in his home, he longed for a family of his own. The Westbrooke name and thoroughbred tradition must be considered, but he knew his desire stemmed more from the void that had developed close to his heart. The emptiness gnawed at him constantly, and was compounded today when he had received a message from Lycinda. She had begged off going to the Opera that very night. Though she pleaded a headache, Nicholas wondered if there were more to it.
Of late, he felt a hesitancy on her part whenever they conversed. He made a point of riding into the city often to see her because he didn’t want her to feel neglected. Now, as he contemplated things, he couldn’t envision Lycinda marrying him and being content to live out here at Wildwood.
He carried Amanda upstairs to bed and wondered idly if Miss Eastman was tucked in for the night. She had been rather stand-offish lately and seemed hesitant even to talk to him. He would have to find a way to draw her out, for he found he missed her smiles. Oddly enough, that brought his thoughts back to Lycinda.
He wasn’t officially engaged to Lycinda Edwardson. Their families had known each other for years, and it had always been expected that the two of them would marry. Because of his parents’ deaths and Cameron’s disastrous marriage, Nicholas had never actually asked her, but neither had he told her he didn’t want to marry her.
However unofficial his association with the Edwardson family, it still demanded he not act on the desire he had begun to feel for Jaci Eastman. Honor warred with desire and indecision, soon giving him a headache. He knew it would be inappropriate to focus his attention on Amanda’s governess, but there was something inherently vulnerable and extremely desirable about her that drew him like a moth to a flame.
Nicholas rubbed his forehead, determined not to think any more about the women who lately were playing havoc with his life. It’s no wonder he had hesitated all these years to marry.
* * *
Jaci stretched lazily towards the sun, amazed that this nice weather came their way as November crept quickly into December. As long as it remained unseasonably warm, she couldn’t force herself or Amanda to remain inside. They had completed a little science experiment with shadows before she chased Amanda off to play and she had sought the shade of the side porch.
She breathed deeply of the clean, crisp air. Not a day passed when she didn’t think of her sister, Mandy, and prayed for her welfare, but she had finally closed that chapter of her life. Though still adjusting to her new life in 1874, she realized her attitude had subtly changed. She had quit grieving.
Pleased that she now walked without tripping in her long skirts, she no longer hesitated when putting layer after layer of clothes on each morning. The lack of a shower still bothered her, but Molly never complained when she requested water for a daily bath. The most pleasant parts of any day were the meals where they ate wild things like quail and pheasant and venison which was shot in the woods on Wildwood property. She often visited with Delta as the old colored cook prepared scrumptious delights in what Jaci had once considered a very antique and backward kitchen. It amazed her that such light and fluffy bread came out of a wood burning stove.
At times, she knew the staff considered her a nuisance. Although she no longer tried to do anyone else’s job, she did follow them around and ask questions about the estate. She wanted to learn everything, and she now considered Amanda, Mrs. Jeffrey, Delta, and the rest of the staff her family.
; The only person she still had trouble with was Nicholas, because she couldn’t determine how to act around him. Though technically his employee, he didn’t treat her as such. Some days he appeared to regard her like family; say, Amanda’s maiden aunt or some such thing. Other days she would catch him staring at her, his eyes dark with passion and she knew he wanted to kiss her. While that confused her, it also made her ache with desire.
She shook her head to clear it, opening the newspaper in an effort to get her thoughts off her very handsome employer. She anxiously looked forward to the delivery of the newspaper and mail. Since she knew there would never be any letters for her, she was usually the first to latch onto the paper.
“Hmmm, at least I landed in the right era,” she mused out loud as she scanned the latest news from Philadelphia. Labor reform for women and children was a hot topic, as was Temperance. The beginnings of Women’s Rights must be right around the corner. She read a short article about Mrs. Annie Wittenmyer of Philadelphia, who was named president of the Women’s Christian Temperance Union. The article reported the women hoped to achieve national temperance by holding demonstrations and through education.
“Yeah, right. Good luck on that one, ladies,” Jaci chuckled, thinking of Carrie Nation and the many other women who had tried, unsuccessfully, to control the distribution and consumption of alcohol.
She started to close the paper when she spotted a notice that the Philadelphia Zoo had recently opened at Fairmount Park. If the weather continued to be this mild, perhaps a trip into the city was in order. The zoo would be a marvelous excuse for a field trip.
She realized how much she enjoyed teaching Amanda, and wondered if she should look into becoming a school teacher. That way if Nicholas ever got around to marrying, at least she would have a job. She frowned at the thought of leaving Wildwood.
“Miss Eastman, hurry! He’s going to eat them!” Amanda’s cry of anguish brought Jaci out of her chair and racing around the side of the house.
Spinning Through Time Page 5