by B. J. Scott
“How can you be certain of this?” She knew that history recorded the massacre and ruthless assault on the castle, even after they surrendered, but she’d hoped the facts were wrong. At least the part where most of the men inside the castle wall perished.
“The man who came to inform us of MacConnery’s return and to expect a visit from him, told father.”
“But how does MacConnery know before anyone else?”
“Apparently he witnessed it firsthand,” Warren said. “He was in that area tending to some personal affairs so must have happened upon the attack. I really dinna know all the details.”
Katherine gasped. “And he did nothing to help?”
“What would you have him do? He certainly could not take on the King of England and his army by himself,” Warren said, then slammed his balled fist against the wall. “I should have gone with Ayden. At least then, I could have watched his back. He’d have done the same for me.”
“Ayden.” Katherine clutched at her throat and staggered backward, her mind reeling. When her knees buckled and her head began to swim, she clung to the bedpost for support. Her worst fear had come true.
“Och, you poor thing. Let me help you.” Lily rushed to her side and encircled her waist. “Lean on me and I will help you back to bed.”
“Thank you,” Katherine replied as she allowed her friend to assist her. Once sitting on the edge of the bed, Katherine lowered her head, cradling her face in her hands. “This can’t be happening.”
“I’m sorry, Ceit, you must think me a coward.” Warren hung his head.
“I think nothing of the sort,” Katherine said. “Ayden told me the reason the Scots were fighting was so people would had the right to choose, and he would never blame you, or think you a coward, nor do I. You made your choice, and Ayden respected you for it.”
“I hope you’re right, but I’ll na forgive myself for listening to da and not going with the patriots to face Longshanks, but there is naught I can do to change things now.”
“I’m glad you didn’t go,” Katherine said. She could see the anguish in Warren’s eyes and heard the tremor of emotion in his voice. “I wish there was something I could do or say to ease your mind.”
Warren stiffened and peered at Katherine. “There is naught you can say, but I do appreciate your support. Unfortunately, it doesna change things here. Da wants to see you as soon as possible, and MacConnery will be here this afternoon and expects to see you.”
“Is there na you can do to postpone Lord MacConnery’s visit, Lord Warren?” Lily asked.
“I’m afraid na. He will be here this afternoon and I know my father will insist Catriona be there to greet him.” He stroked Katherine’s cheek, then rested her hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry, Catriona. I know how much you loved Ayden. I love him like a brother.” He sat on the bed beside her, looped his arm around her shoulder, and drew her into an embrace, then the two of them wept.
After a few minutes of consoling each other, Warren released Katherine and stood. He glanced at Lily. “I dinna usually get emotional and would appreciate if you dinna say anything about this to anyone.”
“You need na worry, m’lord,” Lily replied, then took his spot on the bed beside Katherine.
“Thank you.” Warren glanced down at Katherine. “I’ll tell da I found you and will be back in a bit to check on you.” He turned and left the room, closing the door softly behind him.
“I’m so sorry. I know you had your heart set on Lord Ayden’s return.” Lily scrubbed a tear from her own cheek. “It is a sad day, to be sure. His poor parents must be beside themselves. It was always said he’d replace his da someday as Laird, and he’d have made a fine one.”
“He was a wonderful man, and that bastard, King Edward, should be hung by his balls and then drawn and quartered, or whatever it is they do to people here in the fourteenth century.” She quickly covered her mouth, hoping Lily had not caught the slip of her tongue. But judging by the puzzled look on her face, she’d heard every word.
“M’lady? What is fourteenth century?”
“Pay no mind to me, Lily. I am just so upset, and have no idea what I am saying.”
“You have good reason to be angry, m’lady, and distraught. My heart truly breaks for you. But your da will make things worse if you dinna get ready and greet Lord MacConnery when he arrives.” She moved to the trunk and removed a leine, an embroidered tunic, and a wool skirt, then lay them at the foot of the bed, along with some hose and a pair of leather slippers. “I’ll call for a tub.”
“That won’t be necessary. I will wash in the basin and get dressed,” Katherine said. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to get ready on my own. And if I am to meet with my betrothed, I’ll need a bit of time to think and regain my composure.”
Lily curtseyed. “I understand. There is water in the basin and I will come back in a bit to help you with your hair.” She leaned in and hugged Katherine. “I truly am sorry about Lord Ayden. I will pray for his soul later today at the kirk.” She offered a weak smile, then left the room.
As soon as the door closed, Katherine threw herself on the bed, sobbing. Her heart ached so badly, it felt like it was about to shatter, leaving a gaping hole in her chest that nothing or no one could ever fill. She loved Ayden and hated MacConnery. Even more now than ever. How could anyone expect her to marry when she was grieving so? But then again, she wasn’t completely certain that Ayden was dead. She prayed he’d heeded her warning, and when things seemed grim, had the sense to leave before the final attack.
Hope renewed, she rose from the bed, quickly got dressed, washed her face, and plaited her hair. If there was a chance Ayden was still alive, she’d find out. He might be wounded and in need of help.
After popping a morsel of bannock into her mouth — in an attempt to settle her queasy stomach — and tucking another piece in a pouch she’d hung at her side, she headed for the door. But before leaving the room, she scooted to a shelf by the window, picked up a carved wooden box, and opened it. She wished she still had the wedding band Ayden had given her, but was glad he had it with him and hoped it would bring him luck and keep him safe. She grabbed the bundle of plants Seonag had given her for luck and protection. She wasn’t sure she believed in their power, but couldn’t afford to take any chances. She’d been re-reading the journal entries, so she tucked the book into the box and locked it.
Pausing by the door, Katherine glanced quickly about the room, a sudden feeling that she might not see it again washing over her.
Chapter Nineteen
Even though her heart was crushed, Katherine entered the hallway, wandered through the parlor, and into the kitchen, acting as if she didn’t have a care in the world. Fortunately, the word of Lord MacConnery’s visit had already spread through the estate and people were too busy getting ready for his arrival to pay her any mind. She slipped out the door unnoticed.
“I’m glad to see you’re awake.”
Katherine spun around to face Cora. Not sure what to say, she glanced at the ground.
“I heard the news about Stirling and I am so sorry, lamb.” She tugged Katherine into a tight embrace.
Katherine eased free of Cora’s embrace. “Thank you, but we still do not know for sure if Ayden was killed. He may still be alive.”
“I hope so,” Cora said. “Are you going somewhere?”
“I just need some fresh air and a bit of space. I am going to go to the meadow for a bit, but will be back before Lord MacConnery arrives.” She hated to lie to Cora, but the less she knew the better it would be for her in the end.
“I understand. Take as long as you need. I’ll cover for you with your da until your return,” she said, then entered the cottage.
The amount of support she got from Warren, Lily, and Cora touched Katherine’s heart. It honestly felt like she had a real family again. If she ever found a way back to her own time, she’d miss them all deeply. But she had to get away from Glen Heather. She couldn’t face MacCo
nnery, and she needed a place to think and decide what to do next.
Getting away from Glen Heather was her first priority, so she sauntered to the edge of the forest, then ran until she arrived at the cave where she and Ayden had exchanged their vows and he claimed her for the first, and perhaps the last time. It had started to rain again and Katherine was drenched to the skin, her sodden hair plastered to her head, her slippers caked with mud, but she didn’t care.
As she reached the opening, she halted, unable to bring herself to enter. Not without Ayden. This was their place and it almost seemed like a sin to go there alone. Instead, she doubled over at the waist, drawing in one ragged gulp of air after another, then glanced toward the angry sky. “Why, God? Why did you bring us together only to rip us apart?” She dropped to her knees, sobbing.
“There now, lass. Thing happens as they are meant to happen, but are na always as bad as they seem,” Seonag said as she gently stroked Katherine’s back then helped her to her feet. “Come inside. We must get out of the rain.”
“What are you doing here?” She yanked free of the seer’s grasp and glared at her through tear-filled eyes. “Now it is too late. I searched for you after the feast, prayed that you’d come to me and finish explaining what’s happened and why I’m here.” She lowered her chin and dragged a shaky hand across her damp cheeks.
“I told you more than I should have at the feast. The rest you must figure out for yourself.”
Katherine’s head shot up. “I’ve tried to figure it out, but can’t. I should have told Ayden I was from the future before he left and that I knew the outcome of the battle at Stirling. I should have warned him that most of the Scots would perish and King Edward would be victorious. If I had, maybe he’d be here now.”
“It was not your place to tell him, any more that it is mine to explain all that has happened to you so far.” Seonag moved to the center of the cave and lit a small fire. “You are soaking wet from the rain and shivering like a leaf, lass. Come warm yourself. It willna due for you to get ill, nor is it good for the wean you carry.”
Blinking away the tears, Katherine stared at Seonag. “The wean?” Shocked by what was said, she rose and slid her hand over her belly. “Are you telling me I’m pregnant?” She moved closer to the heat, curious how the woman had started a fire without matches or tinder.
“Have you na been feeling poorly the last few days? And have your courses come of late?” Seonag asked.
“Well, no, I didn’t get my period last month and I have been tired and feeling very queasy. But I just figured it was from being worried and upset.”
Seonag grinned as she tossed some sticks on the burning pile of wood, then reached into a pouch at her side and took out what looked like some ground herbs. After mumbling a Gaelic prayer, she tossed them onto the fire.
A bright blue flame shot skyward, startling Katherine and causing her to take a step back. “I can’t believe I’m having a baby. How?”
“The usual way, I would suspect,” Seonag replied with a wide grin. “And if I am guessing correctly, I would wager Lord Ayden made certain his seed was planted more than once.”
Heat rose in her cheeks as she caressed her stomach and she couldn’t help but smile. She and Ayden had conceived a child, and the thought made her heart soar. But then reality took a nasty hold and her elation turned to sorrow. “A baby his or her father will never see.” She also wondered if she went back to her own time, would she still be pregnant. But first she had to deal with the here and now.
“Do you know for certain Ayden is dead?” Seonag placed her hand on Katherine’s shoulder. “As I have mentioned before, things are na always as they seem.”
“Are you saying Ayden is alive?” Katherine spun around and grasped the seer by both shoulders. “Tell me.”
“I canna tell you that which I dinna know for certain. However, I do know there are things yet to happen that will affect you both. One canna change the past, but they can change their future. Right the wrong and all will be revealed to you.”
Upon hearing the words again, she released her hold on Seonag and wrapped her arms around her middle. “I don’t know how.” She lowered her gaze. “And what happens if and when I go back to my own time? I never bargained on any of this, especially not a baby.”
“You will find a way, Catriona. You must have faith in your love for Ayden, a power so strong, it can transcend time and last forever and beyond,” Seonag quoted the inscription on her ring.
“How did you know what it said inside my ring?” Katherine asked, but her words trailed off when she realized Seonag was gone, and she was very much alone.
Sitting on a log near the fire, Katherine warmed her hands over the flames. It wouldn’t be long before her absence was noticed, if Laird Grant hadn’t already sent out a search party to drag her home. She couldn’t let that happen. She couldn’t go back to Glen Heather and she could never marry Lord MacConnery. She carried Ayden’s child and shuddered to think what her betrothed would do when he found out.
But that wasn’t her only concern. She had to find out if Ayden was dead. And the only people who might know for certain where his parents. She’d been forbidden to leave the estate without Lord Grant’s permission, and he certainly would not approve of her reasons for the visit to MacAndrews’ keep. In fact, if he found out she was even thinking about it, he’d likely have her kept under lock and key until her wedding day.
Her mind made up, Katherine left the cave, surprised to see the sun was shining. Perceiving this as a good omen, she hoped it meant her luck was about to change for the better.
But as she reached what she thought was the border of the Grant estate, she hesitated. Not only had Lord Grant forbade her to leave the estate, but when she read her aunt’s will, she was warned not to go outside the boundaries. After taking a minute to think about her decision, she stepped over the imaginary line dividing the estates. She’d go mad if she did not find out about Ayden.
~ * ~
The farther down the path Katherine traveled, the thicker the brush and foliage became. She’d not ventured beyond the stream at the edge of the Grant estate before now, and had no idea how far it was to the MacAndrews’ castle. She knew the night Ayden rode for the friar and returned, it took him less than an hour, but he was on horseback and she was on foot. Her only choice was to trudge onward and hope it wasn’t too far, or that her father’s men didn’t intercept her before she got there. Once she arrived at the keep, she could find out what happened to Ayden and beg for sanctuary. Surely they’d not turn away their son’s widow and bairn.
As the trees thinned out, replaced by smaller bushes and thickets of brambles, she notices the rays of sunlight peeking through the once dense canopy of leaves above her head. She could hear what sounded like water rushing over rocks in the distance, and as she entered a clearing, she beheld a large open field skirted by thistles, the grassy areas in the center like a floral tapestry of heather, bluebells and snow drops.
Her eyes focused on the falls, crystal clear water from the stream, splashing up and creating a fine mist as it crashed over smooth boulders. After making her way to the edge of the crag, she peered over and her breath caught. The drop had to be at least fifty feet if not more, straight down to the churning water and jagged rocks below. Her stomach clenched as a feeling of familiarity all but swamped her senses. She gulped at the air, trying to fill her lungs as she slowly backed away. She’d been here before and something told her it did not end in a good way. Was this the cliff from which Catriona threw herself?
She pondered the idea for a moment. Given the elation she felt upon finding out she carried Ayden’s child and the option to run away rather than marry MacConnery, a niggling in her belly told her that Catriona would not have jumped. True, she loved Ayden — Katherine felt that — but she also felt the joy of carrying their child and the determination to protect it and bring it into the world, to make sure he or she knew how wonderful their father was. Were she to stay he
re or go back to her time, she would welcome Ayden’s child, love and cherish the gift.
Giving her head a shake, she tried to get her mind off the cliff and back on to the task at hand. She needed to get to the MacAndrews’ keep and find out once and for all if Ayden was alive. Upon noticing the opening to another path, leading into the forest and located on the opposite side of the clearing, she decided to take it. A short jaunt later, she stepped into another clearing and immediately caught sight of a tall stone structure looming on the horizon. As she approached what she assumed was the MacAndrews castle in the distance, she quickened her pace.
“Hello,” she shouted and waved when she arrived at the portcullis. The small castle was surrounded by forest on two sides, and the river gorge leading back to the falls ran behind it.
“Halt and state your purpose,” a guard yelled from atop the curtain wall.
Cupping a hand over her eyes in order to block the sun’s rays, she peered up at him. “I am Lady Catriona Grant, from the estate of Lord Rowland Grant, your neighbor. Please, I would like to see Laird and Lady MacAndrews if I may. It is very important that I speak to them.”
“The Laird isna here,” the guard said. “He and several of his men have gone to collect the bodies of our clansmen slain at Stirling.”
“Have you the names of those who perished?”
“Nay, lass, only the laird knows and he has gone for the bodies,” the guard replied.
“What of Lady MacAndrews? Is she here?”
“As a result of her grief, Lady MacAndrews has retired to her chamber until her husband returns. The healer has given her something to help her rest and she isna to be disturbed,” he explained. “However, if you wish to pay your respects, you are welcomed to wait inside the castle, along with several other mourners who arrived last evening.”