Hush - Fighting Fate #2

by Maree Green

  Easing off the accelerator, I tried to calm down. Now that I was away from Aaron, my sensibility meter was poking its gnarled finger at me. I bit back a curse. Driving right to TJ’s door was a mistake. I knew that. Well, now I did, anyway. I should’ve taken the bus.

  I screamed with frustration, my shrill voice stinging my ears in the quiet of the car. What I really wanted was to tell Ken to go to hell. I didn’t want to go to the scary as shit house of horrors anymore. Mostly because I didn’t want to be caught up in whatever illegal stuff it was they were doing, but a little of it had to do with the confusion I felt when it came to Mitch.

  The more I’d thought about it over the last couple of days, the more I realized how stupid it was for me to think he was protecting me. He was a criminal. A drug dealer and who knew what else. Just because he hadn’t forced me to do anything more than kiss him the two times I’d been there, didn’t mean he wouldn’t do anything else, and I would be insane to think otherwise. Maybe that was his plan. Maybe he was just trying to lull me into some sick sense of comfort before he made his move.

  Nausea came to me the second I stopped the car. I knew this could be the time I lost. Anything could happen, and I needed to remind myself of that.

  Locking the car, I left it in a small off street parking lot and started to walk the rest of the way to TJ’s.

  My heart rate increased with every step I took. By the time I reached the back door to TJ’s house, I was surprised I wasn’t having a full on anxiety attack. The familiar dry mouth and sweaty palms returned as I stepped up to knock.

  The door swung open almost immediately, and I was met by hard, black eyes. I remembered seeing this member of TJ’s gang the first time I came. He had dirty blonde hair, dark brown eyes, and a goatee that could rival one of those mean looking bikers. I couldn’t remember his name, but he jerked his head for me to come in.

  Hesitantly, I stepped in and followed him through to the next room. All of them were there, and they all turned their hard eyes on me.

  TJ walked up to me slowly, his gaze murderous. I felt the bag get taken out of my hand, but I couldn’t take my eyes off TJ’s to see who it was.

  “What’s your part in all this?” he asked me calmly. Too calmly.

  I swallowed. I didn’t understand his question. “What do you mean?” My voice came out sounding as small as I felt.

  “This,” he said, indicating around him, and to the bag.

  I still had no idea what he was trying to get at, but I could see he wanted an answer or he was going to flip the fuck out. “I…I don’t have a part. Ken threatened to hurt my mom if I didn’t deliver this bag to you. That’s it. I’ve never even touched the zipper. I don’t know what’s in it when I come, and I don’t know what’s in it when I leave. And I don’t want to know.”

  His eyes narrowed, assessing. “What do you get out of it?”

  His question surprised me. What did I get? I wanted to laugh. “I get to hope that the next time Ken decides to beat on my mom that she lives through it, so I guess I get nothing at all.”

  He was silent for a while, his eyes drilling into me like needles. “What are we looking at, Mac?” he said without taking his eyes off me.

  “It’s just like he said, TJ. Three bags.”

  It was hard, but I met TJ’s stare for as long as he held it. After god knows how long, he finally stepped back and turned to the side. “You want her Mitch, or should I give her to Pock?”

  My eyes flashed to Mitch and my heart starting racing even more out of control. Was it crazy for me to hope he’d say yes? I wanted that to mean I was just terrified to go with Pock – because I was, but I thought it was more a case of me just wanting Mitch to want me. Stupid, I know.

  Mitch’s jaw clenched a little, but he didn’t react the way I was hoping. Instead, he sighed and ran his hand over his shaved hair. “Yeah, I could use a little release right now I think.”

  He took a step towards me, and I don’t know why, but I took a step back. Where was the guy I thought would protect me? This guy was acting nothing like him.

  He rolled his eyes at me and grabbed my arm. “Don’t make this hard. I’m not in the fucking mood.”

  I closed my eyes against the sting. I’d never felt so alone in my life. I didn’t resist Mitch’s pull, but I didn’t try to stop the tears from sliding down my face either.

  Chapter 24

  Noah

  I was close to losing it. It had taken every ounce of my control not to flip the fuck out when TJ had turned on Kaeli down in the living room. I knew he had no reason to trust Kaeli, but the fear and hopelessness I saw deep in her eyes almost had me coming undone.

  The only thing that stopped me was the fact that all the other guys were just as suspicious of her as TJ. That meant I needed to appear to be suspicious too. It wasn’t hard to be an ass to her after that because I turned all my self-loathing into my outwards appearance.

  But now that I was alone with her in my room, and was watching her try to shrink into herself against the far wall, I wanted to punch something.

  I didn’t bother with the alcohol this time. I knew it wouldn’t do me any good. Instead, I walked over to the bed and slumped down on the edge with my head in my hands. I needed to get her out of this. It was doing me in. I didn’t know how I was supposed to do my job when I was constantly worrying about her.

  This latest development was a huge fucking spanner in the works. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if TJ put the whole fucking shipment back until it was sorted, and I really didn’t want that to happen. I’d been at this too fucking long. It was time to get out. I had to finish it.

  “Fuck!” I rubbed my hands over my face with frustration. Was this fucking nightmare ever going to end?

  All the things I’d tolerated for the job for the last eighteen months was starting to piss me off. Like the smell of fucking smoke on my clothes.

  I lurched to my feet and ripped off my shirt, throwing it to the far side of the room before striding over to the table and planting my palms flat on its surface. Hanging my head, I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to regain my fucking composure.

  This was all just one giant head fuck. I hated seeing that fear in her eyes when she looked at me. I didn’t want her to be scared of me. I wanted her to know I would do anything to keep her safe. But it was a double edged sword, because in order to keep her safe, she needed to think I was the bad guy.

  Checking my watch, I was surprised to see how much time had actually passed. We were quickly getting to the part I both hated and loved. Hated, because I was forcing her to do something she didn’t want to do. Loved, because she felt and tasted incredible.

  Pushing off the table, I clenched my jaw and turned around. She was still up against the wall, but she didn’t seem as tense anymore. She was watching me with a mixture of curiousness and confusion.

  I took slow steps forward, trying to convey my intensions with my gaze as I went, but I knew she already knew what was coming.

  I watched her tense slightly, but it wasn’t the panicked reaction I was expecting. It was accepting. Something stirred inside me and my heart picked up speed. Shit, was I nervous?

  I swallowed.

  When my body was only mere inches away from hers, so close I could feel the heat radiating off her, I stopped. She tilted her head back and gazed up at me. Fuck, why wasn’t she fighting me? She didn’t even look confused anymore. Just curious. And fuck me if I didn’t like it.

  The scent that was coming off her was sweet. It smelled floral, something like jasmine or one of those kinds of flowers. It made my mouth water.

  I watched her taking me in, and I realized she wasn’t going to back down. My breath was coming faster now, the rise and fall of my chest more than obvious. Looking down at her chest, I saw it was the same. Was she scared, or nervous, or excited? I couldn’t tell. Her hands were clenched into fists in her skirt, but her eyes weren’t showing fear.

  Reaching out, I placed my palms flat against the
wall, either side of her head, and slowly, I leant forward.

  Her breath hitched. I saw her eyes flash with something, but I couldn’t decipher it. The split second before my mouth connected with hers, her eyes fluttered closed. Oh fuck. I was so fucking screwed.

  I didn’t kiss her hard this time. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Instead, I gently brushed my bottom lip over hers. She didn’t respond. Her mouth remained still beneath mine, but she didn’t turn away.

  I grazed her lips again, my tongue taking a tiny taste without my consent. I could feel her breath against my mouth, and fuck me if that wasn’t a major turn on. My dick was instantly hard.

  Taking a third taste, I couldn’t help pressing in a little more. She was fucking addictive.

  And then a fucking miracle happened. Her lips moved against mine. It was only the smallest of movements, but I felt it, and god help me, it sent a bolt of pure thrill through my body.

  I groaned, my body reacting all on its own. Pushing against her a little more, I kissed her again. I knew she’d be able to feel how excited I was, and I should’ve felt ashamed, but I was too fucking gone to care.

  When her lips parted to let me in, I was sunk. I was no longer in control of myself. The little voice of reason that had been helping me decide what was best for her was good and buried. I slid my tongue inside, getting my first real taste of her, and I heard myself groan again.

  And when my hands found their way into her hair, I tried to tell myself it was all part of the façade. She needed to look used. Right? Yeah, right.

  But when her mouth actually started moving against mine? That was when I knew I was completely full of bullshit. I wanted her, and I wanted her to want me.

  I kissed her deep, pushing our bodies together from our knees to our chests. One of my hands moved to her lower back, pulling her in harder against me while the other one held her kiss to mine.

  It wasn’t until she tore her mouth away from mine to take deep, panting breaths, and I went to consume her throat, that I realized just how far I was taking things.

  I jerked away from her like she’d given me an electric shock and forced myself to walk away. “Fucking hell.”

  Closing my eyes, I paced the room, willing myself to calm down. When I thought I had myself under control, I glanced up at her. I was expecting to see anger or worry on her face, and I prepared myself to offer an apology, but when I was met with dark desire in her gaze instead, I growled. “Motherfucker.”

  Spinning away again, I screwed my eyes shut. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

  I counted to twenty, then I continued on to fifty, then one hundred. With a deep breath, I forced myself to keep my gaze far away from hers and grabbed a clean shirt out of my cupboard. Shucking it on, I growled something that might’ve sounded like ‘Come on’, then yanked the door open.

  Chapter 25

  Kaeli

  My head was one big swirling mess as I followed Mitch out the door.

  I kissed him. I actually kissed him. And holy mother of god, was it good. I was actually surprised my legs were able to support me right now.

  It had taken all my strength not to touch him. I swear I thought I was going to rip holes in my skirt I was holding on so hard.

  I didn’t know what it was that made me decide not to fight. It might have been the way he ignored me the second we were locked in his room, or maybe it was the way he appeared so desolate as he sat on the bed, or maybe it was just pure sex appeal, the way he stripped the shirt from his body and all those hard, tight contours…

  Whatever it was, it made me want to stop fighting.

  As we walked downstairs, I knew I would’ve looked a wreck, and I supposed that was probably a good thing. If Mitch was going to so much trouble to make it look like he was taking advantage of me – regardless of whether it was for my benefit or not, because let’s face it, it was to my benefit, then the least I could do was act like I’d just been taken advantage of. TJ might be a criminal, but I certainly didn’t think he was stupid, and it took a lot more than some messed up clothes and swollen lips to make it look like someone had been raped.

  I thought of what emotional state I might be in if I really had been in that situation. I could image I’d be a crying mess – pretty much how I had been the last couple of times I’d been in this position, but I wasn’t sure if I could manage tears right now. My head was too much of a mess. I thought maybe I could just go for hollow. I’d imagine if you’d been placed in the same horrifying situation a few times, you’d have to go into some sort of survival mode.

  Moving behind Mitch, I masked my expression into one of emptiness. Of complete hopelessness. I didn’t meet anyone’s eyes, I just moved like I was on autopilot.

  I heard someone laugh. “Damn, Mitch, you’ve broken her. Now she’s not going to be anywhere near as much fun to play with.”

  I didn’t look at Mitch to see what kind of an expression he was wearing, but I heard him grunt a little like he was smirking. “Nah, man, this is just the way I like them.”

  He shuffled me out the back door, put me into his car, and pulled out onto the street without saying a word. His body looked so tightly wound, I didn’t know how he wasn’t exploding. Two days ago I would’ve been frightened of the way he looked, but now I knew I had nothing to be frightened of.

  There was no doubt in my mind that had he tried to go any further with that kiss, I would’ve gone with it. The fact that he was the one to stop it spoke volumes. I wasn’t sure of his reasons, but I certainly wasn’t going to question it. If he was going to keep me safe, I was going to let him.

  It wasn’t until we were a block from where I parked my car that I remembered I’d driven. “Oh shit. I forgot I drove my car.”

  His bright green gaze swung to meet mine with surprise. I really liked these contacts. They were almost as mesmerizing as the violet ones.

  “It’s just in that little parking lot up there,” I said, pointing.

  He flicked on his indicator and pulled in, parking right next to my little corolla. I didn’t know how he knew it was my car, but the fact that he did didn’t surprise me. When I glanced across at him, he was pinching the bridge of his nose.

  “Please don’t drive again, Kaeli. It’s not safe.”

  I quirked an eyebrow. “And walking seven blocks through dark, questionable backstreets at night with that bag is?” I said sardonically.

  He paled a little then sighed. “Point taken, but I’m talking about a different kind of safe here.”

  He let his words hang in the air for a little while, letting me take in his meaning. He meant TJ wouldn’t like it.

  I watched him for a while. It was strange how much I didn’t feel threatened by him anymore. Now that I could look him in the eye, I could see the worry there. I could see the need to protect me. It was…overwhelming. There didn’t seem to be any other way to describe it. It completely overwhelmed me.

  Mitch sighed and let his head fall back against the head rest. When he eventually turned back to look at me, his gaze was desperate. “Kaeli, I want to tell you to keep your eyes open – be prepared for anything, but I also want you to stay blissfully ignorant. Your innocence is such a beautiful thing. I hate that you’ve been thrown into this.”

  I almost gasped out loud. I watched him turn away and glare out his side window, looking very much like he was kicking himself for saying anything. I was in shock. Did he seriously mean that?

  Taking his cue, I turned and looked out my own window. I knew I should be going, but as crazy as it sounded, I wasn’t ready to leave him just yet. I had no idea when I’d be seeing him again.

  Without turning away from the window, I asked, “How often will I have to come back?”

  When he didn’t answer me, I turned to look at him. He was watching me again, but this time his expression was guarded. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. “I don’t know. There’s…” He pressed his lips together and shook his head. “I don’t know.”

  I didn�
�t understand, but he seemed too dejected now to push. Sighing, I reached for the door handle. “I better go then.”

  When all I got was a nod, I slipped out, grabbed the bag off the back seat and turned away. He waited for me to leave first, and as hard as it was, I forced myself not to look at him as I drove away.

  Not wanting to have that god awful bag in my possession any longer than I had to, I drove straight home, dumping it at Aaron’s feet before trudging up the stairs to my room.

  I was so done with thinking. My brain felt absolutely fried. All I wanted to do was take a warm shower and climb into bed. I didn’t even think I’d care if I missed dinner.

  But try as I might, I couldn’t sleep. I just couldn’t get Mitch out of my head. The second I snuggled up under the blankets, the image of him came straight onto the screen of my mind. All I could see was his hard, muscular chest, and his intense colorful eyes.

  And once I started there, I couldn’t stop it. The sweet, sugary taste of his lips, and the firm, mouthwatering contours of his body, had me groaning from the memory of them against me. I wondered if what I was feeling was something along the same lines as Stockholm syndrome. I hadn’t been kidnapped, but I was definitely forced into a situation I had no control over and had to rely on the one person to look after me.

  Yeah, great. I was a walking head case.

  Chapter 26

  Noah

  The closer the shipment came, the harder it was to push down my excitement. TJ still hadn’t given any of us any details, but I had a feeling that had more to do with the fact that he didn’t know the details yet either.

  One thing I could console myself with was TJ’s opinion of me. Since both my visits to Delaney and Jay, it was obvious he was more relaxed around me than usual. I didn’t think he’d ever be able to look at me without suspicion, but I’d learnt he was like that with everyone. Hell, he was probably like that with his own mother. All I knew was that I’d passed some sort of test.