‘Perhaps, but we’ll go and see my doctor right now and find out.’ Mrs Dalton stood up with an air of confidence. ‘But I’d say you’re expecting. You’ve got the look about you. Don’t know why I didn’t notice it before. Wash your face and get your coat.’
‘I’ll drive you. I’ve still got a little petrol left.’
Amy was too stunned to object to Ted using his precious petrol ration like this. Instead she said, ‘I didn’t eat the egg; it will be cold by now.’ What a silly thing to think about at a time like this, she thought, giving them a tremulous smile.
‘Don’t worry about that. It’ll make a nice sandwich and you might enjoy it later.’
The very thought made Amy’s stomach churn uncomfortably. ‘No, I think you’d better eat it.’
It didn’t take her long to wash and make herself presentable, and they were on their way.
When they arrived at the doctor’s, Ted stayed in the van. Mrs Dalton came in with Amy, had a word with the nurse on duty, and after only a five-minute wait, Amy was called in.
Dr Grant was grey and middle-aged, with a gentle manner. His examination was thorough and while the nurse helped her to dress again, he waited at his desk for her.
Hands clasped tightly in her lap, Amy looked at him with pleading eyes, almost afraid to hear him speak in case he told her it wasn’t so.
‘Well, Mrs Sterling, I’m pleased to be able to confirm that from my examination, and what you have told me, I judge that you are around three months pregnant.’
Her response to that was to burst into tears, making him frown in concern.
‘Do I take it that you are not happy about the baby?’
‘Oh, no,’ she sobbed. ‘I’m deliriously happy.’
He smiled then. ‘You are obviously feeling very emotional at the moment.’
‘With reason, doctor.’ She then explained what had happened to John, and this was the first time she had been able to put the horror of it into words.
He listened, his expression sad. ‘In that case I’m happy you are carrying his child. Now, I want you to come and see me every four weeks, and you must take care of yourself.’
‘I will. I won’t let anything happen to this precious baby!’
He wrote something on a form and handed it to her. ‘This will mean you can get things like orange juice and a few extras to make sure you eat properly.’
‘Thank you.’ Amy put the paper in her bag, shook hands with him and went out to Mrs Dalton, who was waiting anxiously.
Amy sniffed and nodded. ‘I am expecting John’s baby.’
‘That’s wonderful!’ Mrs Dalton kissed her in delight. ‘Let’s go and tell Ted the good news.’
Amy was so elated by this wonderful news that she could hardly think straight, and the excited talk in the van as they went home passed right over her head.
As soon as they arrived back, Mrs Dalton made a pot of tea and they sat at the table. Amy nibbled a biscuit, gazing at Mrs Dalton and Ted in wonder. ‘I can hardly believe this is happening. John would have been so thrilled. We’d planned to have a large family…’
‘Now, now,’ Mrs Dalton said when she saw the tears gathering. ‘You mustn’t upset yourself.’
‘But our child will never know its father…’
Ted gave her another biscuit. ‘That’s sad, but the little one will have a wonderful mother, grandparents, and all of us here.’
‘John’s parents will be pleased, won’t they?’
‘I should say so. Drink up your tea and then go and pack your case.’
Amy looked up quickly at Mrs Dalton. ‘Why?’
‘Because you’re going to stay with Mr and Mrs Sterling until the baby’s born.’
‘I can’t do—’
‘Amy.’ Ted stopped her protest. ‘What would John have done if he’d been here?’
‘Well… sent me away from the danger, I suppose.’
‘There’s no suppose about it, my dear. You’ve got the baby to think about now, and you mustn’t take any chances.’ Mrs Dalton had her ‘won’t take no for an answer’ face on.
‘Is there any petrol in Ben’s car?’ Ted looked equally determined to send her out of harm’s way.
‘Not much, but I don’t want to leave you here on your own.’
‘We’ll come and see you regularly, won’t we, Ted?’
‘Of course we will. You won’t be able to keep us away, and if the raids stop you can come home again.’ Ted was on his feet. ‘While you pack your things, I’ll see if I can wangle you some petrol.’
‘How are you going to do that?’ This was all moving too fast for Amy to take in.
‘Never you mind. There’s ways when it’s necessary.’ Then he was gone.
Within an hour Ted had returned with enough petrol to get her to Hampshire. ‘I’ll drive you there and get the train back.’
‘You’ll do no such thing, Ted.’ Amy decided it was time to take some kind of control. ‘I’ll drive myself and stay for a couple of weeks. But I’ll be returning, because I have to see the doctor every month.’
‘You can transfer to a doctor down there.’
‘No, Mrs Dalton.’ Amy’s mouth set in a determined line. ‘I’m not staying there until September. This is my home and it was John’s for a while. I want our baby born in this house, if possible.’
‘That would be lovely.’ Mrs Dalton looked quite overcome at the thought. ‘But there’s plenty of time to decide things like that. John’s parents are going to be over the moon about this.’
It didn’t take Amy long to pack a few clothes, and then she was on her way, eager to tell John’s parents the good news, but determined that she was not going to be persuaded to stay there all the time. She needed to be in the home she had shared with John, Howard, Ben and the rest of her family. Oh, darling, she thought, I wish I could hold you and tell you about the baby.
But she didn’t allow herself to dwell on the sadness too long; there was so much else to think about. It was a bright day, and although it was only mid-March, there was enough warmth in the sun to give a hint that spring was not far away, and the months ahead did not seem so bleak. She was expecting John’s child!
There was little traffic on the roads now petrol was rationed, so she relaxed, glad to have this time alone to gather her thoughts.
The front door was opened as soon as she drove up, and Mrs Sterling came out to greet her.
‘Amy, what a lovely surprise.’ She gave her daughter-in-law a hug. ‘Come in. How long can you stay?’
The grief of losing her son was etched on her face and she seemed to have aged ten years over the last few weeks. Amy hoped that news of the baby would help to ease the pain a little. She knew it had for her, although she would never get over the loss.
‘I was wondering if you’d let me stay for a couple of weeks, Mrs Sterling?’
‘We’d love that, and I think it’s time you called us Charles and Mildred, don’t you?’
Amy smiled her agreement.
‘You can stay for as long as you like. Have you brought a case with you?’
‘It’s in the boot.’ Amy went to the rear of the car, but before she could remove the case, Mildred had picked it up eagerly and they went into the house.
‘I’ll show you to your room after we’ve had a drink. Dinner will be an hour yet, so would you like a sherry?’
‘Not for me, thank you.’ She looked around, searching for any sign of her father-in-law. She wouldn’t give her news until they were both here.
‘Charles will be home any moment.’ After pouring herself a small drink, Mildred sat opposite Amy. ‘Oh, it’s so good to see you, my dear. How have you been keeping?’
‘It’s a struggle, but Mrs Dalton and Ted have been a great support.’
‘I’m sure they have.’ Mildred listened for a moment. ‘Ah, here he is.’
Amy heard the key in the front door, and remembered how she had waited eagerly for the same sound as John arrived home. She had bee
n told that time would ease the pain, but it was still almost crippling, and she didn’t believe it would ever go completely. She had loved him so much, and still did. Time could never change that.
‘We have a guest, dear.’ Mildred greeted her husband with a smile on her face. ‘Amy’s come to stay for a while.’
‘That’s wonderful.’ He kissed her cheek. ‘I hope it’s going to be a long stay?’
‘A couple of weeks.’ She waited until he had settled. Like his wife, he looked drawn and tired. ‘I’ve come unannounced because I have some news for you.’
‘Is it Ben?’ Mildred clasped her hands together tightly as if expecting bad news.
‘No, we still haven’t heard anything about him. But this is good news.’
Charles sighed. ‘That will make a change, Amy. What is it?’
She pitched straight in. ‘I’m pregnant. It must have happened at Christmas, while we were here…’
She tailed off. Her hurried explanation appeared to have had a stunning effect, for they were both on their feet, staring at her, as if they hadn’t understood what she had just told them.
‘I’m very happy about it.’ Amy was concerned now. They weren’t saying anything. They couldn’t be unhappy about the baby, surely? This wasn’t the response she had expected. ‘I thought you’d be pleased.’
That remark snapped them back to life. Mildred began to cry and smile at the same time, and Charles dipped his head as if trying to control his emotions.
Then he looked up. ‘Oh, my dear, you couldn’t have given us better news.’
Mildred finally recovered, taking hold of Amy’s hands. ‘This is absolutely wonderful. We shall all have something of John in the child. What a gift!’
Amy breathed a huge sigh of relief. ‘Gosh, for a moment I thought you weren’t happy about it.’
‘We were stunned, that’s all.’ Charles sat beside her, grinning broadly. ‘You did the right thing leaving London. It will be safer here for you and the baby.’
‘I won’t be staying all the time,’ she told them firmly, as she knew they would try to persuade her to remain with them. ‘I won’t do anything to put the baby at risk, it is far too precious, but I would like it to be born in Chelsea. We were so very happy there for the short time we had together.’
‘We understand.’ Mildred’s eyes were shining with joy. ‘For the next two weeks you can relax, sleep and eat. And whatever your decisions are, Amy, we will respect them and do all we can to help. How are you feeling?’
‘All right at the moment, but I was sick this morning.’
‘Well, you just tell me what you want to eat.’ She looked at her husband with a smile of amusement. ‘Do you remember that I had a craving for pickled gherkins?’
He chuckled. ‘Don’t remind me.’
Amy was delighted to see the change in them. They were such good people. Now the news had been accepted with joy, she was suddenly tired, yawning time and again. It would be good to take things easy for a while, away from the threat of air raids. A time of quiet to let this all sink in, and prepare herself for the birth of John’s child – their child.
‘Oh, I’ve brought my ration book with me. You can’t feed me without it.’ Amy pulled a face as she held it out. ‘Better not try and give me an egg at the moment.’
‘I understand.’ Mildred’s eyes filled with moisture again as she gazed at Amy. ‘Do you know how much this means to us, Amy? You are carrying the grandchild we thought we would never have. This is a bittersweet day for all of us.’
Amy couldn’t agree more.
*
That was the best night’s sleep she’d had for some time. Amy stretched, looking round the pretty pink room, relieved Mildred had been thoughtful enough not to put her in the room she had shared with John over Christmas.
There was a knock on the door and Mildred came in with a cup of tea and a plate of plain biscuits. ‘Good morning, my dear, did you sleep well?’
‘Very soundly. I hardly remember getting into bed last night.’ She propped herself up and took the cup. ‘You mustn’t wait on me. I’m usually the one who does all the cooking and clearing up in our house.’
‘You must allow me a little indulgence.’ Mildred smiled and sat on the edge of the bed. ‘What would you like for breakfast? I’ve got some bacon—’
The cup crashed down on the bedside table as Amy scrambled out of bed and rushed for the bathroom.
When she came back Mildred was waiting for her. ‘I shouldn’t have said that, should I?’
Amy shook her head, picked up the cup and gulped her tea down.
‘Ah, you’re obviously all right with tea, so what about a fresh pot and some toast?’
Her stomach didn’t rebel at that suggestion. ‘That will do fine.’
‘You just take your time and stay in bed as long as you like. It’s only nine o’clock.’
‘Good gracious! I’ve usually been up for a couple of hours by now.’
‘There’s no reason for you to get up early while you’re here.’ Mildred walked to the door, and then looked back, amused. ‘My sickness stopped when I reached four months.’
‘That’s something to look forward to then,’ Amy muttered as she crawled back into bed, picked up a biscuit and nibbled cautiously.
32
Bowing to pressure from Charles and Mildred, Amy had stayed for three weeks, enjoying the peace of the countryside, and had returned to London feeling rested. But the raids had been bad, and after a particularly nasty one, she had willingly returned again, much to her in-laws’ delight. They were naturally worried about her being in danger, and even more so now that she was pregnant. However, by the end of May the bombing had stopped and she had been able to come home. She loved John’s parents dearly, but Chelsea was her home and she didn’t like leaving it for too long. There were still raids in various cities and industrial areas, but the persistent night-after-night bombing of London had stopped, much to everyone’s relief.
Now it was 26 September and the house was full, eagerly awaiting the birth of her baby. Charles and Mildred had arrived four days ago, quickly followed by Howard and his girl, Chrissie.
‘Do sit down, Amy.’ Howard placed a chair behind her as she stood in the kitchen door, hands in the small of her back. ‘You’re as round as you are tall, and top heavy.’
She grimaced at him, but sat down as he held on to her shoulders. Apart from about four weeks of morning sickness, she’d had a trouble-free pregnancy, and the months had gone quickly enough. Now she was fed up – the baby was a week overdue.
Howard crouched down in front of her. ‘You’d better get a move on, Amy, as Chrissie and I have only two days left of our leave, and we want to see the baby before we go back.’
‘I want to see it too.’ She sighed and rubbed her back again. ‘Why don’t you marry Chrissie?’
‘When the war’s over.’
‘But that could be years yet. We’ve survived Dunkirk, the Battle of Britain, as Churchill called it, and the Blitz, but we’re still on our own in this fight. America is showing no sign of joining us.’
‘Look on the bright side.’ Howard grinned. ‘Hitler didn’t invade.’
‘Not yet!’ she glowered, making him roar with laughter.
‘Oh dear, we are in a bad mood, aren’t we?’
She cuffed him round the ear. ‘So would you be if you had this.’ She ran her hands over her very large bump.
‘But it’s John’s baby,’ he said gently.
The scowl disappeared and love filled her large eyes. ‘I want to hold it.’
‘Won’t be long now.’ Chrissie came in, looking extra pretty without her army nurse’s uniform. ‘Time you had a nice bath.’
‘Bath?’ Amy gave her a disapproving look. ‘I had one this morning, and you know what a job I had getting in and out of the tub.’
‘I’ll help you again. I’m used to bathing bigger people than you. Come on, you’ll feel better after it.’
Wit
h a resigned sigh, Amy hauled herself out of the chair, muttering, ‘I bet she’s a terror on the wards.’ Then she grabbed hold of Howard. ‘Ooooh!’
Mildred was immediately by her side. ‘What is it? Have the contractions started?’
Amy nodded. ‘I think so. I’ve never felt anything like that before.’
Chrissie checked her watch. ‘Let’s see when the next one comes. Walk around if you want, Amy.’
Howard put his arm around her and they walked slowly up and down the kitchen.
The next contraction had Chrissie springing into action. ‘Ted, you go for the midwife. Tell her to hurry. The contractions are only eight minutes apart. This is going to be fast for a first baby. Oh, and let the doctor know as well.’
Amy smirked at Howard. ‘Bossy, isn’t she?’
‘Into the bedroom with you.’ Chrissie took over from Howard.
‘Everything’s ready.’ Mildred came the other side of Amy and they led her into the other room.
In the end it was eight hours before her daughter decided to grace them with her presence, and came into the world yelling at the top of her voice. To Amy it was the most wonderful sound she had ever heard.
‘Let me see her!’ She struggled to sit up, but was pushed down again. ‘Show me!’
The baby was put in her arms and she searched her little face, looking for John’s likeness. It was hard to tell, but one thing was clear, their daughter didn’t have Amy’s wide mouth or up-tilted eyes, or at least not yet.
‘Be like your daddy,’ Amy whispered, her voice thick with tiredness and emotion.
The doctor was there as well, and after examining both mother and baby, declared himself satisfied. ‘You have a fine strong daughter, Mrs Sterling, weighing in at six pounds, ten ounces. You have done well, but now you must rest.’
‘Thank you.’ Amy could hardly keep her eyes open.
‘You are lucky to have a skilled army nurse staying with you. She will look after you and the baby for the next two days.’
Amy smiled her thanks at Chrissie, hoping Howard did marry her soon. If she hadn’t married John when he’d asked she wouldn’t have this beautiful baby now. She liked Chrissie very much and they got on well together.
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