She did. Her gaze drifted around the room, at his open suitcase with clothes still neatly folded inside, at the washbowl filled with sudsy water and the washcloth and towel hanging on a hook. The bedding remained perfectly smooth with not even a rumple in sight. Even the papers Jonathan had mentioned were neatly stacked on a side table beside her. Evidently, his neatness extended beyond his appearance.
He stood in front of her, his shirt still hanging open. She fought against admiring his flat stomach and thick chest, but couldn’t draw her gaze away. His room suddenly seemed very warm.
“I’m truly sorry if I offended you. I hope you’ll accept my apology and allow me to help you in your time of need. ”
His words snapped her back to the moment, and she clucked her tongue against the back of her teeth. “I’m not destitute, for heaven sakes. I just need to earn money and get myself established again. I’m quite capable of taking care of myself, thank you very much.”
He held up his hands in protest. “Whoa, you misunderstood. I didn’t mean to intimate that you can’t handle your own matters; I just offered to help you start over. Won’t you need clothing to secure employment?”
Again Sarah glanced down at her attire. Unless she wanted to work in a livery stable, she needed to dress like a woman. She peered up at his handsome face. “What’d you have in mind?”
Jonathan perched on the edge of the bed, thankfully buttoning his shirt. “I’ll be more than happy to purchase a complete new wardrobe for you. I can bear the expense without problem since you seem to be a little short at the moment.”
Sarah saw strings dangling from his proposition. She stood, rising to her full height. “I absolutely refuse to become your charity case. I have no doubt you would expect something in return for your investment.”
He shook his head. “No, No, I wouldn’t. This would be purely a loan. If you prefer I not be involved in the process, I’ll give you the money personally. Once you start receiving a regular wage, you can repay the debt. If it makes you feel any better, we can actually draw up a contract of some sort.”
Sarah sat again and pondered the logic of his offer. Purely a loan.
“Well, what do you say?” he asked after a long silence.
“I suppose there would be no harm in accepting your generosity. Certainly, dressing like a more respectable citizen will only enhance my chances of gaining employment. I’ll do it … but I insist you prepare the proper paperwork for my signature.”
“I’ll have it ready in the morning.” Jonathan took her elbow and ushered her into the hallway. “Goodnight, Sarah. Sleep well.”
She stood outside his closed door, puzzled why he’d help someone he barely knew. His apology seemed sincere, his offer unselfish, and he claimed to have no motive behind his actions. Could he truly be the gentleman he appeared? Sarah entered her room, still unable to dispel her sense of apprehension.
* * *
Bright light streaming in and wagon wheels creaking outside woke Sarah. Last night, she’d opened the window to the stuffy room before crawling into her downy featherbed. Remembering Jonathan’s offer, she quickly rose and shuffled to the washstand. The reflection in the wood-framed mirror above the basin displayed rumpled hair and eyes still swollen from sleep. She heaved a sigh.
Pouring water into the bowl, she filled her cupped palms, then dipped her face into them. The coolness snapped her from her sleepy haze. She finished her toilette by brushing her tangled hair and letting it hang free. With a grimace, she donned the same clothing she’d worn, and after lacing her boots, she hurried toward the stairs, following the aroma of bacon and coffee. From the corner of her eye she spied Wolf’s bedroom door standing open, and him gone. Sarah entered the kitchen, anxious to see his face, but Maggie was the only one there.
“Good Morning, Sarah dear.” The proprietress stood at the stove, cracking eggs into a pan of bubbling grease. “I’ll have your breakfast ready in a moment. Go ahead and help yourself to a cup of mud.”
Sarah noticed dirty dishes on the table. “Did you already eat, Maggie?”
“I‘m not one for food first thing. I usually have only coffee. That‘s Wolf‘s mess; I just haven‘t gotten around to cleaning it up yet. I ventured outside to hang the wash. It‘s such a beautiful mornin’.”
A lump formed in Sarah’s throat and she slumped into a chair. She feared she already knew the answer to the question on her lips, but she needed to be sure. “Where is he?”
Maggie plopped a full plate in front of Sarah. “Oh, darlin’, he left about an hour ago. Said he had lots to tend to and didn’t know when he’d be back. He told me to tell you goodbye.”
Chapter Nineteen
An indescribable emptiness engulfed Sarah until emotions took over: hurt, anger, disappointment, and a myriad of other feelings raced through her. She fisted her hands on the table. After all those weeks on the trail, Wolf didn’t even have the decency to tell her good-bye in person. What a fool she’d been, thinking she meant something to him. Unbidden tears welled.
Maggie stared at her. “Are you all right?” She placed a cup of steaming coffee on the table.
Sarah blinked and straightened in her chair. “I’m fine… really, I’m fine.”
Maggie sat next to her and patted her hand. “You care for him, don’t you, dear? I can see it in your eyes.”
Sarah sniffed and swiped at the tears. “It’s this blasted morning sunlight. It’s very bright in here and I just woke up. Wolf was a friend, that’s all.” She picked up her coffee and tried to wash down the lie along with the lump in her throat.
“Good morning.” Jonathan’s deep voice drew their attention to the entry from the parlor. His suit looked crisp, freshly pressed, the starched collar of his white shirt buttoned tight at his thick throat. Every strand of hair was impeccably in place. He cast a dimpled smile at Sarah as he pulled out a chair and sat. “Are you ready for your shopping trip?” He fanned a wad of currency.
Reluctant to discuss their deal in front of Maggie, Sarah felt her cheeks heat.Luckily, their hostess placed breakfast and coffee in front of Jonathan and excused herself from the room.
Sarah pushed away her plate and glared across the table. “Honestly, Mr. Montgomery,” she said in a hushed tone. “I’d prefer that not everyone know my business. I fully intend to discuss my finances, or lack of, with Miss Smith, but having you hand me money in front of her paints a very curious picture. After all, we barely know one another.”
He sighed. “Why am I always apologizing to you? It seems I can’t do anything right where you’re concerned.” He shoved the money across to her. “Here, just take it and do what you will.” He fished in his breast pocket and produced a piece of paper. “Sign this and return it to me at your convenience.” And then ignoring her, he lifted a forkful of potatoes to his mouth.
Sarah stood, stuffed the bills into her pocket and carried her dishes to the sideboard. Why was she being so rude? She turned, planning her words. Admitting to being wrong wasn’t easy for her. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. Here you are being so nice and all… Please forgive me, Jonathan.”
He held his coffee cup midair. “Apology accepted, Miss Collins. You’d better hurry and get your shopping done… that is if you still want to accompany me this morning.”
“Of course I do.” She smiled. “I’ll be back soon.” Spinning on her heel, she bolted out the kitchen door.
Her nose filled with the stench of fresh horse manure mixed with dust from the street. The assailing fog cleared by the time she sauntered past the wagon shop, replaced by the smell of freshly sawed wood. Next door, the aroma of alfalfa drifted from the bales stacked inside the hauling company’s door. Ahead of her, the town square loomed large. The courthouse stood in the center where four streets intersected. She’d caught a brief look at the brick building when she and Wolf sped by. Now she stood and admired its majesty, clearly the most elegant building she’d ever seen. Its white framed windows, large arched door and spiral on the roof
set it apart from all others.
“Excuse me, sir,” she called to a passing stranger. “Could you point me in the direction of the mercantile?”
He eyed her skeptically. “Just turn to your right and go ‘bout six doors down.”
“Thank you for your kindness.” Sarah hastened in that direction. Her excitement grew like a wildfire, the moment she placed her hand on the doorknob.
Just like the boarding house, a bell on the opening door tinkled to announce a customer. Sarah entered, catching a whiff of fresh apples in a barrel near the door. Next to them, a saddle draped across a wooden stand brought back unpleasant memories and caused her to pucker her face. She’d have no need of one of those leather contraptions again.
“May I help you?” A round-faced clerk at the counter near the back stopped what he was doing. His cursory assessment of her resulted in a subtle eye roll. She didn’t miss it.
“I’d just like to look, if you don’t mind.”
“Take your time. I’m here if you need me.” He turned and resumed stacking cans on the wall behind him.
Bolts of cloth and ribbon rolls lined a table on one side of the room, amidst racks of dresses already sewn and ready for sale. Clearly, viewing the woman’s part of the store, she glanced across the aisle. Tools of every size and shape leaned or hung on the opposite wall, with ropes, lanterns, and men’s wear displayed as well. She patted her pocket, assured that her money remained safe then turned her attention back to her wardrobe needs.
The door tinkled again. A smartly dressed older lady sauntered in. “Good Morning, Clarence.” She gave a haughty wave of her lace handkerchief. “Did that special gown I ordered come in yet?
“Sorry, Mrs. Goodwin, not yet. I expect it any day though.” He ceased working, wiped his hands on his apron and hurried from behind the counter.
“Honestly,” she tutted, tucking her hanky back inside her sleeve. “You realize the social is just a few weeks away? A body just can’t depend on people anymore.” She walked to the rack of dresses where Sarah stood.
Clarence followed behind like a loyal pet. “I’m sure it will be here in time, Mrs. Goodwin. I do hope you‘ll overlook the slight delay. In the meanwhile, can I help you find something? You know you’re one of my most valued customers.”
She motioned him away with a fling of her hand. “Oh, don’t be a bother. Just go back to whatever you were doing. I’m quite capable of looking about without you shadowing me.”
Stopping at the table where Sarah stood, the woman fingered an array of ribbons.
Sarah smiled at her. “Good morning. I couldn’t help but overhear your mention of an upcoming social….”
The matron peered down her angular nose. “Yes, it’s a yearly affair, but…” Her cold, gaze raked over Sarah’s attire. “Surely you aren’t inquiring for yourself. It’s usually only attended by those able to dress for the occasion.”
Sarah gasped at the woman’s rudeness, but wasn’t about to let it pass. Cocking her head, hands on her hips, Sarah drew up to her full height. “Oh, then there’s no worry. My mother taught me to dress myself when I was quite young. She also taught me not to be rude to my elders, so I’ll overlook the fact that you’re a snobbish old biddy.”Surprised by her own outburst, Sarah stared at the woman with wide eyes, waiting for a response. None came.
With mouth agape, the older woman huffed out of the store. Sarah went back to perusing the dresses and heard Clarence chuckling behind the counter. She giggled, too, pleased that she’d stood up for herself. People who judged others by their appearance deserved the same disrespect.
Pausing in thought, she drew her knuckle between her lips. She’d just experienced a small taste of what Wolf dealt with every day.
“Oh, there I go again,” Sarah muttered, thumping her palm against the side of her head. “Why can’t I stop thinking of him?”
Shaking her thoughts aside, she inspected each dress she slid across the rack. It took time, but Sarah selected four new ones, a few matching ribbons, an assortment of undergarments, some stockings, a nightdress, and a new pair of shoes. Calculating the cost in her head of everything she’d piled on the counter, she crossed to the far wall and returned with the stylish new bonnet she coveted and a small bottle of lemon verbena. Jonathan’s loan was generous and she’d have a little left over.
The clerk peered over his spectacles at her, a smile broadening his face. “It looks like you found everything you needed.”
“Yes, thank you. I was surprised to discover such a wonderful assortment of dresses. I feared I might end up searching for someone to make them.”
“Well, we aim to please.” He tied her purchases into bundles, collected his money, and pushed the packages toward her. “Do come again.”
With Sarah’s arms overloaded, he followed her to the door and let her out. The bell jingled. “Have a nice day, Miss…and thanks for….” He chuckled again.
She glanced back. “It was my pleasure, believe me.”
Sarah peered around the load she carried, careful to watch her step. Her heart fluttered at the thought of getting out of her ill-fitting, unsuitable clothing and into something more befitting a lady. Pants had been the perfect attire for riding astride, but with any luck she’d never have to do that again. Her extended arms ached beneath the packages she carried, and she breathed a sign of relief at passing the freight company. She was almost back to the boarding house.
Maggie spied her while collecting laundry from the clotheslines in the side yard. “Lordy, girl, looks like you bought out the store. C’mon in the back way.”
Once inside, Sarah dumped her load onto the table, took a breath, and shook her cramping arms. “I feel like I’ve carried an anvil.”
“Then how about something light, like a cup of tea?”
“I’d love a quick one, but then I’ve got to get changed. I’m supposed to meet Jonathan this morning.”
Maggie put the kettle on the stove to heat. “Wolf tells me you’re in a little bit of a bind at the moment. I promised him I’d look after you and told him we’d work out financial arrangements that’ll allow you to stay for as long as you need.”
Sarah gulped. What must Maggie think? Especially after seeing Jonathan’s offer of money. “Maggie, how can you be so nice to me? I should have explained my financial situation myself and asked for your help. It wasn’t Wolf’s place.” Her shoulders sagging, she massaged the bridge of her nose. “I’m afraid I was too embarrassed to be honest with you. The money you saw Jonathan give me this morning was a loan so that I could buy these new clothes.” Sarah patted one of the bundles on the table. “I have to find a job, and I’m pretty certain no one is going to hire me looking like this.” She tore into the packages and draped the dresses over a chair for Maggie to see. “Aren’t they lovely?”
The kettle whistled and Maggie poured tea through a strainer into delicate china cups. She balanced two of them and waddled to the table. “I’m sure you’ll look stunnin’ in any one of them.”
“You must think me shallow, talking only about myself. I’d like to assure you that I’m very responsible and will be very happy to do my share around here. I have a few dollars left in my room upstairs from the previous sale of my possessions in Hannibal, and the rest of what I borrowed from Jonathan is here in my pocket. I’ll give you what I have with a promise to pay regularly as soon as I find employment, if you‘ll be kind enough to keep me on.”
Maggie reached across the table and patted Sarah’s hand. “I never had a bad thought about you, dear. I’ve learned that if Wolf likes someone, they are usually above reproach. You’re welcome for as long as you need to stay. Now sit down and enjoy your tea.”
* * *
Sarah whisked her full skirt back and forth while spinning in a circle. She paused in front of the mirror and stood on tiptoes, trying to take in as much of her image as possible. The blue gingham dress with bell sleeves, fitted cuffs and a high collar suited her perfectly. It would do nicely for a buggy ri
de and lunch at the hotel. Hopefully, Jonathan would agree.
She heaved a sigh, preferring instead to be impressing Wolf. But she still inwardly fumed at him for leaving without saying a word. Still, she wondered what he’d think of her hair pulled back with a ribbon instead of an old piece of rawhide. Would he like the tendrils that framed her face or notice the sweet smell of lemon verbena she‘d dabbed behind each ear?
“Stop it, Sarah!” She stared at her reflection. Pulling her mouth into a pout, she reminded herself he’d made a choice and she wasn’t it. Exhaling in a loud whoosh, she squared her shoulders and resolved to concentrate her attention on her day with Jonathan. He was equally as handsome, fit, and at least showed interest in her. Besides, he seemed more the type of man who could offer someone a good future. What she felt for Wolf was only gratitude that got out of hand. At least, that’s what she’d keep telling herself.
Slipping her feet into her new shoes, she took a last glance in the mirror and pinched her cheeks to give them color. She donned her new bonnet and tied the ribbon tastefully to the side of her face, then started downstairs, holding her skirt up as she went. Dressing like a lady again felt good
Through the front window she saw Jonathan pull up in a buggy drawn by a dappled Gray. Her heart didn’t skip a beat nor did her stomach flutter like it did when Wolf came into view. Sarah took a deep breath and stepped outside, wondering why she wasn’t excited. She clung to one positive thought: In Jonathan Montgomery’s company she was less likely to be the target of
unwelcome gunfire.
Chapter Twenty
Sarah paused on the walkway, pasted a smile on her face, and then glanced at Jonathan. “Good morning. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long.”
He clambered out of the buggy and hurried around to her side. The look on his face was one of sheer surprise, his eyes wide and his jaw slack. “I…I…can’t believe….” His head shook slightly. “Excuse me, I didn’t mean to indicate that….”
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