The pain shoots up to my shoulder and I wince, pulling away.
“Aah,” I say. “This fucking thing.”
“Sorry!” Sam says. “I forgot.”
“So did I,” I grin. She smiles and takes a step back. “I got carried away.”
“We’re not doing much walking,” she says as she glances at me sideways.
“Kissing it better.”
She laughs and nods towards the path. We keep walking as she interlaces her fingers in mine. Our arms swing gently between us, and I feel a constant current of energy connecting us. My cock feels hard and heavy between my legs. It rubs against my thighs with every step, like a constant reminder of my burning desire.
“I could get used to this city,” Sam says. “It’s not as hectic as I thought it would be. I thought I’d be overwhelmed but I’m kind of enjoying it. I like walking around and having no one know who I am.”
“Anonymity can be good,” I reply. “It can get lonely sometimes though. Sometimes I feel like I’m surrounded by millions of people but there’s not a single one of them that I know.”
Sam chuckles softly and shakes her head. “I guess it’s the same everywhere. When I left Lexington I felt like I was being suffocated. I understood why Jess left when she was young. All the stares and the whispers about me. You’d have thought I was the one who cheated.”
Her voice is bitter and I glance over to see her face drawn. Her lips, usually so plump, are pulled into a thin line across her face. My heart pulls in my chest and I want to help her somehow, but I don’t know what to say. I just nod and grunt. Sam shakes her head.
“Sorry,” she says. “Isn’t the first rule of dating ‘don’t talk about your ex’? Clearly I’m out of practice,” she laughs.
“I don’t mind. I like listening to you talk,” I say. The words surprise me. The fact that I’m walking hand-in-hand with a woman surprises me. The fact that I’m enjoying it as much as I am surprises me.
My thoughts drift to Victoria and all the bitter months that led up to the end. I don’t remember the last time I actually enjoyed a woman’s company. Is this what it’s supposed to feel like?
“I think you’re really brave,” I say. Sam glances at me and scoffs.
“Right,” she says.
“I mean it! You’re going through the toughest thing anyone should go through. It’s no fault of your own, and here you are in a brand new city making something new of yourself. A lot of people would just wallow in self-pity and crumble after something like that. I know people who have been through divorces that haven’t been the same since.”
Sam sighs. “I’ve done a lot of wallowing,” she admits. She shakes her head and laughs. “A lot of wallowing. It hasn’t been pretty.”
“I doubt that,” I say. “I can’t imagine you not being pretty.”
Sam glances at me and lets out a laugh. She nudges me with her elbow. “Very smooth.”
“I try,” I say with a grin. I look down and meet her eye for an instant and my heart grows in my chest. She turns her head and takes a deep breath.
“It’s such a beautiful night.”
“It is,” I reply. My heart starts beating as I think of what I’m about to ask. Our loop through the park is almost done and I can see the street where I parked. All I want to do is bring her back to my place. I clear my throat. “My apartment building has a nice balcony. We could grab some wine and go up there? There’s a beautiful view of the city.”
Sam looks at me, tilting her head to the side. She smiles sadly and shakes her head. “I shouldn’t.”
“Why not?” I say, maybe a bit too quickly. Sam squeezes my hand slightly and she stares straight ahead as we turn back onto the road.
“I’ve had a wonderful evening, Dean, I really have. A wonderful day, actually,” she says. She pauses and takes a deep breath and then shakes her head. “I’d love to go back to your place but I’m just not ready. It’s too soon.”
My voice is soft when I reply, squeezing her hand back. “We don’t have to have sex, Sam. I just want to spend more time with you.”
She finally looks at me again and tilts her head. It looks like she’s studying my face as her eyes squint the tiniest bit. Finally she smiles softly.
“I wouldn’t trust myself,” she admits, laughing. “I don’t want to do anything I’ll regret.”
“You’re probably right,” I say, swinging my arm across her shoulders. Her arm crosses over across my back to hang on to my waist. “Let’s just take it slow.”
She doesn’t say anything, but she leans her head against my shoulder. We walk up to the car and I find my keys in my pocket to unlock it. When I pull the passenger’s side door open, she puts her hand on top of it and looks at me.
“Thank you, Dean. Thank you for understanding.”
“Don’t be silly, Sam.” I pause, and take a step towards her. I run my finger along her cheek and tuck a strand of that rich brown hair behind her ear. “I like you. I’m not going to pressure you to do anything.”
She smiles and I dip my lips down to hers. This time we kiss softly, maybe more softly than I’ve ever kissed anyone. Our mouths brush against each other and she parts her lips to let me kiss her ever so slightly deeper. I groan and pull away.
“This isn’t making it any easier to say goodnight to you,” I say.
Sam laughs. “Oops,” she says with a wink before turning to the open door and sliding into the seat. I close the door behind her and let out a sigh. I try to walk around the front of the car normally, struggling to hide the fact that my cock is rock hard between my legs.
Chapter 16 – Samantha
Saying goodbye to Dean was difficult, but when I close Jess’s front door and lean against it with my eyes closed, I’m glad I didn’t go to his place.
I wanted to. Obviously, I mean, come on. What girl wouldn’t want to be with him. I was so close to giving in and going to his place and letting myself have a wild night with him, but I couldn’t. I just sent my divorce papers to the lawyer today, it feels wrong to go to bed with someone else.
All I need is some time to think. I don’t know if he’s a rebound, or a distraction, or a way of me getting over Ronnie. Or maybe, and this scares me almost more than anything else, maybe he’s the real thing. Maybe he is as caring and kind as he seems to be.
Jess surprises me when her head pops up around the corner.
“Tell. Me. Everything,” she says in a hushed whisper.
“I didn’t think you’d still be up.”
“I couldn’t sleep,” she admits. “Come on, you want some tea? Wine?”
“Tea sounds good,” I say, following her to the kitchen. I sit down and she starts boiling the water and then turns to me.
“So…???” She looks at me expectantly. I laugh and then shrug.
“It was fun. It was great! We went to a jazz bar and then went out for a walk.”
“I saw that car he picked you up in. A Bentley? Was that a rental? Who is this guy?”
I laugh. “I’m not sure,” I say as I shake my head. “He said his father is an investment banker, and I’ll be honest I’m not exactly sure what that means.”
“Neither am I,” Jess says as she drops a cup of tea in front of me. “So?? I thought for sure I wouldn’t see you until tomorrow. Will you see him again?”
“Yeah,” I reply. “Well, I hope so. We kissed.”
Jess makes a noise and gives me an approving nod. “Good girl,” she says. “As you should.”
I laugh. “It was nice. I mean, it was better than nice. He did that thing where he wraps his hand around my head and like pulled me closer. Do you know what I mean?”
“Mmm,” Jess says approvingly, nodding as she takes a sip. “That’s hot.”
“So hot,” I reply with a laugh. “I couldn’t think straight.”
“And you didn’t want to sleep with him?”
“I mean, yeah, obviously I did. I do!” I laug
h. “He invited me back to his place.”
“You said no?!”
“I’m not ready, Jess. I just sent the papers to the lawyer today. I’m not even officially divorced yet.”
Jess shrugs. “That doesn’t mean anything.”
“I know, but I just don’t feel ready. I don’t know how to explain it. It’s like I’m still mourning the end of my marriage. It feels wrong to just jump into bed with someone else.” I hold up my hand. “I know what you’re going to say. You’re going to say it didn’t feel wrong for Ronnie, but I’m not like him. I don’t know, I can’t put it into words.”
Jess smiles. “I wasn’t going to say that. I get it. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely want you to bang him, but if you’re not ready yet then that’s ok. I don’t think you have to wait for the official divorce to go through though, if that’s what you’re waiting for.”
“It’s not,” I say as I take a sip. “I don’t know what I’m waiting for. Even when I was kissing him, like I was loving it and it was so hot and I was more turned on than I’ve been in years. But it still felt like I shouldn’t be doing it. Or like, I was going to get caught. Does that make sense?”
“Yeah,” Jess says. She takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry you’re going through this, Sam. I thought your wedding was the real deal.”
“So did I,” I say, but the words catch in my throat. I shake my head and blink my eyes a few times. “I don’t want to cry. I just met an amazing, sexy, respectful man that wants to see me again. I should be happy!”
“Did he seem upset when you turned him down?”
“No! Not at all. He was so nice about it, it seemed like he really understood why I said no. I mean, when we were kissing I think I felt a boner,” I say with a grin. Jess bursts out laughing and claps her hands before bringing her hands to her mouth.
“The twins are asleep,” she explains and then grins at me. “You could feel it?! How did it feel?” she asks. “Like..?” she pulls her two index fingers apart. “Tell me when to stop,” she says and wiggles her eyebrows at me. I laugh.
“I don’t know, it’s not like I felt it up. I mean, I could feel it through his pants so it’s not like it was small.”
Jess grins. “I can’t wait for you to get laid.”
“Me too,” I laugh. “Who knows, it might happen sooner than later.”
“I hope so,” she says. “So when are you seeing him again?”
“I’m not sure, we haven’t made any plans. Hey, Jess,” I start, looking at her hesitantly. I take a deep breath and try to ignore the nervousness in my chest. She nods her head expectantly.
“What is it?”
“I was thinking I might stay in New York a bit longer than I thought. Would it… would it be alright if I stayed here?” I ask, finding the courage to pull my eyes up to hers. “Only until I find my own place! I promise. I’ll pay you rent.”
Jess laughs and stands up to move towards me. She wraps me in a hug. “Of course, Sam. Stay as long as you want. I told you that! We have an extra bedroom for a reason, and you’re great with the twins.”
She sits back down and grins at me. “He’s had quite the effect on you,” she teases. I feel my cheeks blush immediately and I shake my head.
“It’s ok,” Jess says with a laugh. “I’m happy for you. You deserve to be happy.” She smiles at me and I feel my heart grow in my chest. “You also deserve to get laid,” she says. “Like, properly laid.”
I laugh. “I can arrange that.”
“Good. Alright, I’ll see you in the morning. Just leave those mugs in the sink, I’ll get them in the morning.”
“See you tomorrow.”
Jess gives me another hug and goes back to her bedroom. I sigh and look around the kitchen. I can hear the noise of cars outside and a distant siren. I shake my head. I guess I’ll be trying the city life for a while.
Chapter 17 – Dean
I resist the urge to text her as soon as I get home. I glance out the floor to ceiling windows and imagine Sam’s face if she were to see the skyline from up here. I’m sure she would be blown away, it’s a spectacular view. I pull out my phone and walk out to the balcony, taking a panoramic picture of the skyline. I find Sam’s number in my phone and send her the snap.
A few minutes later, I get a photo message back from her. I open it up and see her face, surrounded by pillows and blankets. She has a soft smile on her face and I immediately wish I was there beside her. My cock throbs again and I sigh. Even seeing her face or thinking of the way she moves sets my body on fire.
I write a quick text to respond.
Have a good sleep. Dinner tomorrow?
I press send and walk back inside, closing the sliding glass door behind me. I slump down on the sofa and try to ignore the butterflies crashing around my stomach. Why would I be nervous about asking her out? We’ve already been out together!
My phone buzzes and I practically pounce on it.
Sounds good xx goodnight
I send her a quick goodnight and lean back in my couch. I let out all the air from my lungs and shake my head. Where did she come from? Why is my head spinning so much? Why is my cock throbbing constantly?
Well, I mean, I know the answer to that one. My hand drifts to my crotch and I trace the outline of my cock with my fingers over my jeans. I run my hands up and down the length of my shaft and groan as it starts to get harder.
I pull out my phone and look at her picture. Her eyes are half-closed, and I try to see what she’s wearing. I can’t see anything except her face and shoulder, and I close my eyes to imagine her naked body. My head fills with images of Sam. I think of the way her shirt hugged her curves. I could just see the outline of her bra peeking above the lace when she leaned over. I think of the way my fingers sank into her waist, or the way her face brightened whenever she laughed. I think of her kiss, and how her body felt when it was pressed against mine. I could feel every curve as she wrapped her fingers around my neck and pulled herself closer to me.
I start thinking about things that haven’t happened, and I unzip my pants to finally free my cock. I imagine what she would look like if she were here in front of me. Maybe she’d kneel down and take my cock between those perfect lips. I could touch her breasts and wrap my fingers into her hair as I watched her take inch after inch of my cock in her mouth.
A groan escapes my lips as I wrap my fingers around my shaft. Pretty soon I’m imagining Sam all over me. I’m picturing what it would feel like to plunge my cock deep inside her and wondering what she tastes like when she’s sopping wet. My hand moves up and down and I groan as I close my eyes, waiting for that sweet release.
It’s the thought of her bouncing on my cock that makes me come. I imagine myself exactly in this position on the sofa, and Sam bouncing up and down as she rides me. I imagine running my hands all over her body and feeling her walls contract around my shaft. I imagine her wetness running down between my legs as she plunges my cock deep inside her.
My balls tighten up towards my shaft and I push my shirt up my chest. I come hard, letting my seed shoot out of my cock onto my stomach and chest. I groan as I feel the release of my orgasm and my whole body tenses and then relaxes. I take a few deep breaths and sigh. My body is twitching until finally that familiar post-orgasmic calm washes over me.
As good as that felt, I know it would be nothing compared to the real thing. It was more just relieving the pressure in my balls than getting any real pleasure from it. I sit up and look around for a cloth or a tissue. Of course, there’s nothing, and I need to jog to the bathroom to clean up. Once I’m done, I splash some water on my face and take a deep breath.
I understand why she didn’t want to come back to my place, and I respect it, but damn, I wish she was here. My cock isn’t permanently semi-hard anymore, like it’s been all evening, but the rest of me feels empty too. I wander back to the kitchen as my stomach growls. I haven’t eaten in hours. I open the fridge and look
inside, sighing as I pull out some ham for a sandwich.
When I first left my ex, I was heartbroken but also glad for the space. I loved being my own man and being able to do whatever I wanted. I loved having the whole apartment to myself, I loved coming and going and bringing home whoever I wanted.
Now, all of a sudden this apartment seems cold and empty. I slap some mustard on the bread and put the ham on top of it. I look back in the fridge for cheese and let out another sigh. I’m not sure what to do with myself now, it feels almost lonely in here. I put the other piece of bread on top of my sandwich and stare at it for a couple seconds. If I’m being completely honest with myself, I don’t want to be eating a ham sandwich by myself on a Saturday night. I want to be out with a beautiful woman, having a delicious meal, and then coming back here and fucking her brains out.
I take my first bite and groan in satisfaction. I shouldn’t blame the sandwich. The sandwich is delicious. If Sam were here having a post-orgasm ham sandwich with me it would be the best meal of my life. I know what these feelings are, and they’ve been building up inside me ever since my breakup.
It’s loneliness, plain and simple. The single life is great, but it’s lonely. A ham sandwich by yourself doesn’t taste as good as a ham sandwich with a beautiful, intelligent, witty woman. I pull out my phone and take a picture of the half-eaten sandwich, unable to resist sending it to Sam.
Wild Saturday night over here.
I know I shouldn’t bombard her with texts. I should be playing it cool, and letting her sleep, but I can’t. I want to see her again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. I want to know what she’s thinking and I want to make her laugh. I want to share everything with her, even this stupid sandwich.
I’m surprised when my phone buzzes. I open it up to see a photo message from Sam. I open it quickly and burst out laughing when I see a picture of a bowl of cereal.
Cereal party at my place. Bring Cheerios.
I chuckle and shake my head. I know she’s joking but I’d be at her door with a box of Cheerios in an instant, all she’d have to do is tell me to come over.
Knocked Up by the Billionaire's Son: A Secret Baby Romance Page 6