“I don’t want to fight it. It’s who I am. Starlet knew that. She was so much smarter than you. She wouldn’t have gotten everybody slaughtered,” I hit him where it hurts. Expecting him to give up. To leave me for dead.
“I’m not leaving. You can try and beat me down all you like. I love you Azure…” He says it so calmly; I feel something within me slip… something for just a second, recedes.
“No…”
“Yes.”
“NO!” I bellow. No more love. No more compassion. Nothing matters but pain. That’s the only thing you can count on.
I muster all the strength in my tailfin and break free of the air binding in which I’m trapped. I find his flesh, soft and flawless beneath my fingers. The darkness overtakes me and I lose all sense of myself. It is just me, my fists, and the rage inside. I’m rolling like a wave, crashing into everything in my path and decimating it.
My stupid brother just lays back and takes it.
CALLIE
My muscles tense. This has gone far enough. I power forward to aid Orion, but find myself flung backward through the water. Gideon catches me within his large arms, as though I were no more than a baby. Ghazi and Cole look at me.
“He doesn’t want anyone’s help,” I comment, feeling my heart hammer against my ribs. What the hell is he playing at?
“How the hell are we supposed to do our jobs if he won’t let us?” Cole barks. I shrug.
“Just let them go at it,” I sigh. Gideon almost laughs to begin with, but as time moves on, silent horror falls over us. I watch as Azure pummels Orion, biting and scratching. He lets her, only making sure not to contaminate his blood with hers. I watch as she bloodies his face. All I can hear is him taking the punches, letting her project her grief onto his physical form. It goes on…
“I still love you,” he whispers, spitting water tainted red.
“NO!” She screams. She moves her assault, banging her fists onto his chest, pounding his heart over and over again. Smashing his ribs. I wince.
“I’ll always love you. You’re my sister.” I watch as something shifts. Azure collapses.
Just like that, it’s over. She’s done.
She lies on his chest and begins to sob. It all seems so wrong. He brings up bruised and beaten limbs and holds her. Letting the air field around them drop.
The sound that emits from her lungs is unholy. It’s the most tortured sound I’ve ever heard, almost as though her soul has been fractured, left torn and bleeding, losing vital fluid. She continues to sob as I cock my head and watch her, pity filling my eyes. Orion continues to keep his arms around her form.
Finally, he props himself up and leans against the back wall of the tower. It’s then that I get the first proper glimpse of his face. Oh my Goddess. His nose looks broken. His forehead is split open where her finger nails have scoured him. His lip is split open, and both his eyes are swelled under his scales to the point where he can barely open them. They’re bruising already, because of his accelerated healing. His chest is covered in scratches where her nails have gauged skin from muscle. He looks exhausted, but he still manages to smile sadly at me. I can’t grasp how beautiful he looks, even bloodied and bruised.
I’m aware someone is at my back.
“Chief. There’s something you need to see.” It’s Cage.
“Can’t it wait?” My father and I turn together, meeting the mint green eyes with impatience.
“You really need to see this.” He looks concerned, and my stomach flips. What could be so serious?
“I’ll come too,” I suggest, looking back over my shoulder to look at Orion. He’s now crying too, holding Azure and mourning the loss of his sister. Just as he should be.
“We’ll stay here. Just in case,” Cole suggests this before I even have to ask. He’s in tune with what needs to be done for Orion. I had never really appreciated it before, but he’s so selfless, always putting his King’s needs before his own.
“Okay. Let’s go.” My father places a hand around the back of my shoulders and squeezes. He smiles at me and I feel my heart swell in spite of everything that’s happening around me. I’m glad I hadn’t given up on finding him, now more than ever.
I can see what Cage is so concerned about when we finally reach the outside of the hollow iceberg. In the open arctic sea, a whirlpool has appeared.
“What the hell is that?” I ask, slightly shocked.
“I would say that’s your ride,” Gideon says with a sly smile. I had filled him in on Atlas’ letter already and in the few minutes I had to discuss it with him, he’d agreed following in Atlas’ mission to create the conduit is the only lead we have on how to defeat the Necrimad.
“What?” I look at him.
“A long time ago… I remember reading somewhere that whirlpools can be kind of like portals.”
“Sedna’s codex,” Cage nods, saying the words as though they mean something to me. They clearly mean something to Gideon, his eyes widen.
“Ah… yes.” My dad clicks his fingers, as though the memory has just fit into the puzzle of his psyche.
“So you’re saying I have to go in that thing?” My tail muscles throb as I imagine the water taking control over my body, like it had when I’d been lost to Orion in the storm.
“You all do. When you’re ready. If you think finding these vessels is the right thing to do?” We hang in the cold chill of the open water, looking into the terrifying speed of the whirlpools spinning depths.
“What do you think?” I look at him, feeling unsure of myself. I wonder if I’m really qualified to be making these decisions. Orion seems to think so, but he loves me.
“I think that Atlas was a wise man. But he’s no longer here. It has to be your choice to undertake such a mammoth task. It’s not going to be easy. You may very well die in the course of such a quest.” I swallow hard as my dad’s words reach me. He looks morose, devastated. I think on them. I might very well die, so could Orion.
“I don’t want to die.” I whisper. I look up at the surface of the water, it wasn’t a few months ago I was ready for death, I had wanted to martyr myself for the mer, but somewhere inside myself I’d known that everything was going to be okay. That it was the right thing to do. I don’t know that about this situation. What if we’re slaughtered? What if in recruiting all the other mer pods we wipe out the world’s defences in one flail swoop. I’m scared, I don’t know if I can lead an army, I don’t know if I can beat Saturnus and Solustus. They’re so much older than I; have so much more power and wisdom. I feel tiny and insignificant, fragile and vulnerable. I then feel an anger begin to stir, something irrational coming to the surface.
Why do they have to do this? Why can’t they just leave us and the world in peace? Why is this happening to me? Why can’t it be someone else’s problem? I sigh as the torrent of questions come forth in a tormenting cascade. My dad looks at me and frowns.
“I don’t want you to either, you’re my daughter, but you’re also a queen, and if a queen won’t fight for her cause who will? It is not my place to stand in the way of this world’s safety for selfish reasons.” He passes this wisdom but I can tell he’s forcing it out, like it’s duty bound. I know he really wants my safety above all else deep down.
I think on this, looking into the swirling waters of the whirlpool. I wonder once more why it is me who has to make this sacrifice, why everything fell on the shoulders of the few of us who became mer to begin with.
Then, something Orion said once comes back to me.
We’re not made. We’re chosen.
I was chosen. I was chosen by Atargatis to be her vessel. If that isn’t a sign for the undertaking of such a journey, then I don’t know what is. I realise that being among the mer has shown me how to believe. I never would have trusted in the plan of a Goddess six months ago. But how can I deny that she knows what she’s doing? I have proof in the very man who I would never have chosen for myself, who was born five hundred years before my time, and yet
suits me so perfectly.
“I want to do it,” I decide aloud, sure of myself for the first time in a while.
“Very well then. But before you do, I want to have a celebration. Just one night. I feel we must honour Starlet and Atlas. I have waited so very long to meet you. I also want a dance with my daughter before she leaves again,” Gideon sighs, looking at me with hopeful eyes, as though he’s wishing for my safety in the days ahead.
“Sure, why not? After all, we could all be dead tomorrow,” I reply carelessly, looking over at Cage. He’s watching me with bright eyes.
“We still need to find the vessel among you. You got that from what I said before?” I ask my father.
“Yes. I know. You said about wanting to use Azure’s visions.”
“I know. But I don’t think she’s really in the place for socialising right now,” I sigh.
Goddess, this is such a complete and utter mess. I realise suddenly that my heart is heavy in my chest; it’s been that way for a while I think, but I’ve stopped noticing. I breathe outward, keeping focus on the whirlpool that continues to spin, trying to calm myself.
“There’s another way,” I remember, thinking back to the Necrocazar.
“Oh?”
“Well, actually there are two. We can either use Ghazi. That’s how I first found out. Or, we can have me kiss every Adaro in the land…” I joke but my dad frowns.
“Yeah, Orion might not be too happy about the kissing idea. Also, I’m not ready to see you kissing random strangers quite yet. How about we try seeing if someone can absorb my powers?” Gideon suggests.
“We could do that… but when I first used my powers to absorb things, I only managed it because I was frightened. I was fighting,” I admit this.
“Well, we have a colosseum inside. Nothing the Adaro like more than a test of strength. Why don’t we set up a tournament?”
“Sure… I guess. Just no more killing okay?” I request with a faux frown, he laughs.
“Of course not. I’ll announce it. Come on.” Cage turns at my father’s final sentiment, leading us back inside the city. I watch Gideon swim next to me, his white tailfin stark in the clear water. He catches me staring out of the corner of his eye and smiles.
I find it hard to believe how quickly everything happens once my father announces the tournament. Adaro come from all over, rising from their frozen homes and flocking to the colosseum . My father blows out of a conch, which I know he must have brought from warmer waters, calling attention over his people. While he does this, I head back up to the tallest tower of the ice palace, seeking my other half. I’m worried. Azure was calm and sobbing when we’d left, but I know that she could turn back to a violent frenzy just as easily. I also need to find Ghazi and Cole. I’ll need them as fighters in the colosseum if I’m going to make this thing work.
I reach the top of the spiralling ramp that leads to the tallest room of the highest tower, take a deep breath and open the doors, swimming forward into the room.
Ghazi and Cole are still inside, so is Orion, right where I left him; slumped against the wall, battered and bruised. Azure is still in his lap, her long onyx locks covering her face like a shroud of mourning. I shut the doors behind me softly.
“Hi. I need you two. We’re gonna hold a tournament to find the Adaro vessel,” I explain. Ghazi looks concerned.
“Don’t worry, it’ll be a controlled situation. I won’t let anyone get hurt. Besides, Gideon is refereeing,” I explain, trying to reassure him. Ghazi twists his mouth in a frown, looking concerned still. Slowly he nods. Cole looks back to Orion and Azure. A familial heap of melancholia.
“Can we leave them?” He asks me.
“I don’t think she can do anything worse to Orion than she already has,” I shrug.
“Well, she could kill him,” Cole suggests and I cock my head, scowling. Suddenly a cracked voice reaches us.
“I can hear you. I’m grieving, not deaf,” Azure looks around to us, her hair falling from her cheek and back down her back. Her pupils are icy blue. Her skin pale. She looks different. I smile at her. “What are you staring at?” She barks at me. I blanche slightly and she laughs. Orion rises from beneath her, his tailfin sliding out, stiff. He looks broken. His body is a sick masterpiece of coloured bruises. He moves over to me and I place my hand on his chest. He winces.
“Oh God. Sorry,” I apologise and he goes to smile, but then winces. Even his cheeks look swollen.
“It’s okay… I’ll be okay,” he says but I don’t believe him. “I’m going to take Azure back to the room with me. You go. Go find the vessel.” I twist my mouth, not liking the idea of leaving him alone. He senses my reserve. “If she was going to kill me, she’d have done it by now. We’re family. It’s going to be okay.” He places a hand on my cheek, whispering. I watch him wince again, the patch of ribs beneath his arm are exposed, showing purple and red blotches appearing beneath the skin.
“Okay. I’ll come and find you later. Hopefully I’ll have an answer by then.” He doesn’t acknowledge that he’s heard what I’ve said. I’m glad, because every minute movement seems to give him agony. Instead, he turns and takes Azure by the hand and leads her past us. Her eyes drop, and it’s the first time I’ve ever realised how she feels about herself. She’s ashamed.
Once they’re gone, I feel myself exhale a breath I hadn’t known I’d been holding. Ghazi and Cole do the same. I turn to them.
“Let’s go,” I command. “We’ve got a vessel to find.”
Sitting in the chief’s box on the balcony surrounding the pit of the colosseum had been exciting at first. The Adaro were extraordinary warriors, there is no denying that. I have been watching them now for hours though and it is wearing thin. There has been no sign of the vessel, not anywhere. No matter how closely I look at the fighting, I’m not getting even a glimmer of anything vessel-like about any of them.
Gideon approaches me, rising up from his refereeing duties down in the snow-covered arena, now speckled with tiny spatters of red from minor injuries and scrapes.
“You look bored,” he frowns. I’m draped across the chair that is slathered in thick white furs; my tail cocked over one armrest, and my spine pressing against the other. I exhale.
“How can you tell,” I roll my eyes. This has been going on for hours and we still have nothing. Nika and Cage are sitting next to me, looking at me with disapproving stares. I know as queen I should probably pretend to be interested, maybe oooh and aaahh at regular intervals, but with Orion pulverised, Azure falling apart, and the mermaids being ridiculously over-excitable at the announcement of a celebratory ball, people are exhausting me beyond the point where I give a damn.
“I have brought you some light reading,” my dad gestures over to Cage, he swims toward us holding something large and brown in his hands. Gideon takes it from him as he stills, reaching us, and passes me what turns out to be a book.
“What it is? It’s huge!” I exclaim and he laughs.
“Sedna’s codex. I wondered if it might help us narrow down the search. You flick through it while I start the next match.” He turns from me and I watch him leave. I can’t believe he respects me so much. I’ve never had such trust from a parent before. I’ve not known that a relationship with a parent could be so much like a friendship, but better. I smile to myself, content momentarily.
The moment passes too quickly, but I look down,distracting myself, as I trace my fingers across the cover of the old leather bound book. It’s thick and the pages are aged and heavy, preserved in wax as usual. I open the book and the language inside is, thankfully, English. Diagrams of icebergs, text about ice formation and maintenance run on for chapters and chapters. Fighting techniques and indexes of several different types of heat radiating demons catch my attention with terrifying pictures. I flick through them absent-mindedly, not stopping until something catches my eye.
I sit up, and flick back a few pages, enjoying the crinkle of old paper beneath my touch. There it is. A
symbol I had seen before. A circle filled in with four intertwining crescent moons. I look down at it, trying to remember where I had seen it. Then I realise I’d seen it twice. Once in Azure’s vision, the seal had been carved with the very same design. I know I’ve seen it somewhere else, somewhere before Azure… I stop, replaying my crystalline memories. The location comes back to me, the epiphany cresting like a wave.
The temple of Atargatis.
The symbol had been crafted into the wall of the temple. The temple where I’d found my scythe. The scythe that had been used to cause so much blood shed. The passage isn’t like the others. It’s been written in. Not printed. How strange. I read it to myself a few times. It doesn’t make sense. It just seems like a lot of crazy ramblings.
The vessel is a container. The vessel is a container. The vessel is a container, a container with bars.
I look at that handwriting. It seems familiar.
The conch blows a hollow sound, demonstrating that the latest match has come to an end. I see that Ghazi has smashed Sirenia’s face into the snow. Good.
“Next up… we have another challenger for Ghazi. Cage!” My father’s voice booms deep, reverberating through the water and making the particles within it vibrate. His last word hits me and I drop the codex.
“A container with bars… WAIT!” I call out but it’s too late. The fight has already started. It doesn’t take long for me to witness what I already know to be true. Cage absorbs Ghazi’s strength and slams him into the furthest wall with a massively overcharged outward push of both hands. He looks down at himself, clearly confused. The codex forgotten, I swim down into the arena. Ghazi looks at me as if to say happy now?
“It’s him! He’s the vessel!” I point at Cage. I hear gasps above.
“It can’t be him. Why on earth would Sedna choose him? He’s not even the best fighter!” Cain yells from the stands. I turn to look up at him and shrug. If I knew the answer to his question I wouldn’t be fumbling around in the dark for answers myself.
The Kiss That Saved Me (The Tidal Kiss Trilogy Book 2) Page 43