“My dad left us when I was little.”
Her eyes widened. “Oh, I’m sorry.”
“Thanks. It was a long time ago though.” That was his standard comeback. So when he kept going, he surprised himself. “But it still hurts as much today as it did back then.”
“Does it feel like something’s missing in your life?”
Exactly. He nodded. “I was five and my sisters were four. It was really tough.”
Ralphie let out a tiny bark, like he understood. Luke reached down to pet him for a few moments.
“It wasn’t just that he left. A lot of people’s parents get divorced. It was the way he did it and the way he was afterward.”
“What do you mean?”
“One day he got up and announced he was leaving. That was it. Like he was deciding he no longer liked a certain TV show. Done with that. Next. My sister Winnie used to say she felt like a shoe.”
“A shoe?”
“Like my dad bought a pair of shoes and when he got home he decided he didn’t actually want them anymore.”
“Wow, that’s really harsh,” Lola said. “He never gave you any reasons why he abandoned you?”
Hearing the word abandon always felt like someone punched him in the gut. You abandoned bags of garbage, not a wife and kids. He wasn’t something for someone to dispose of. Although, that’s exactly what had happened.
“One time, not too long after he left, he said that he wasn’t dad material. The life he was living wasn’t for him.”
Lola’s mouth dropped. “He said that to a five-year-old?”
“I think I was six by that time, but yeah. Probably thought I didn’t understand and wouldn’t remember. But I did, on both counts.”
“Do you have any contact with him now?”
“None. The first couple years he tried.” He used air-quotes when he said the word tried. “Cards, presents, phone calls, that sort of thing. Even as a child, I didn’t buy it. Neither did my sisters. Gwen especially. She’d also been the closest with him. Something about his efforts just never felt genuine.”
“Kids are intuitive, more so than adults usually,” Lola said.
“When I started dating, I guess I realized how fragile relationships really were. A person can up and peace out like that.” He snapped his fingers together. “If a certificate of marriage isn’t enough to keep a person grounded, what’s supposed to keep a couple with no legal ties together?”
Feeling worked up, he took a moment to collect himself. “To answer one of your earlier questions, I have been in relationships. None of them worked out.”
“So why even try,” she said.
“Exactly.”
She grabbed his shoulders, forcing him to look right in her eyes. “No, Luke. You still have to try. I’m not saying that you need to be in a relationship with me, but at some point in your life you have to be brave enough to let another person inside.” She rapped a knuckle against his chest.
“Why?” He croaked out the question, his voice scratchy and his eyes burning.
“Because you’re missing out on so much. Think of the possibilities.”
Luke grimaced. “Think of what my dad did to my mom. Think of how hurt she must have been.”
Lola scooted closer to him on the bench. “I’m thinking about how hurt you must have been. How hurt you still are.”
She was right, and all that hurt was currently balled up in his throat, making it difficult to speak.
“You stay out of relationships because you’re afraid the other person will leave. You don’t want to get hurt.”
That wasn’t right. He shook his head, willing his throat to clear so he could explain properly.
“No. I don’t want to be like my father. I don’t get into relationships because I don’t ever want to cause another person that level of pain.”
Lola placed a soft hand against his cheek. “You’re not worried about yourself?”
He covered her hand with his. “I’m worried about the other person. What if I’m like my dad? What if I also decide that the life I’m living isn’t exactly for me?”
He realized he was admitting more to her tonight than he had in a long time. Maybe ever. Even to himself.
“Sometimes, even all these years later, I obsess about my dad leaving us. Over twenty years later, and the pain is just as real, just as raw. I guess when you told me about your mom and dad the other day, I thought I knew how you felt. My dad left me, and your parents left you. I know they’re not comparable situations.”
“Aw, I think I get it now.”
“But maybe you’re better at handling your pain that I am.”
She looked thoughtful. “I think people handle their issues in different ways. Besides, it’s not the same situation. My parents are gone and nothing can bring them back. But you, well, your dad is still around. Somewhere. In a way, that’s probably even harder.”
Exactly. No one had ever honed in on it so accurately before. Not his mom, not his sisters, not the counselor he’d seen in elementary school. His dad was out there, somewhere, living his life. Did he ever wonder about his son, his daughters, his ex-wife?
“So you understand why I’m not into relationships. They turn sour.”
At this point—if Luke even let things get this far—most girls had heard enough. The ones who enjoyed a challenge would persist. Try to break him down. Challenge accepted. Others would roll their eyes, storm out, stop following him on Instagram and Snapchat. The Millennial cold shoulder.
But Lola looked…thoughtful, he decided. She adjusted her glasses.
“I don’t know,” she said.
“What?”
“Your whole theory isn’t very substantiated. Take my parents, for example. They were married for twenty years. Well, before my dad passed away.”
“Do you think they’d be together today if they were alive?”
“Yes,” she said without hesitation. “Their relationship was beautiful, their stories wonderful.”
He looked down at his feet, kicking at an imaginary stone with one of them.
“Don’t get me wrong,” Lola continued and touched his forearm. “Things weren’t perfect. Every day wasn’t a second honeymoon. They fought. They drove each other crazy. My dad would walk around the house and floss his teeth, and my mom hated that. My mom wasn’t a good cleaner, and my dad was OCD. But that’s what was great. Their relationship was real.”
Her eyes lit up as she spoke about her parents. In fact, they practically sparkled as a huge smile blossomed on her face.
“What are you thinking about now?” he asked.
“Hm? Oh. I was thinking about one of my favorite stories. My parents’ first date.”
She sat back, a dreamy expression on her face. It was as if she was instantly transported to another time, another place.
“I thought it was at the movie theater.”
She shook her head. “Nope. That was where they met. Their official first date was the next night.”
“My mom was Italian so my dad took her to an Italian restaurant in Georgetown.”
“Ciao Bella?” It was a popular place on the corner of M Street and Wisconsin. Tourists loved it.
She scrunched up her nose. “Nah. That place is a chain and way overpriced. He found this little hole in the wall called Ristorante Formaggi.”
“Cheese Restaurant?” he said translating the name with a chuckle.
“My dad always said don’t judge a restaurant by its name, a cheese by its smell, or a movie by its trailer.”
Luke let her dad’s words soak in. He bet he would have liked Mr. McBride. More than that, he was really starting to like his daughter.
Speaking of not judging a book by its cover, Lola McBride continued to surprise him.
“Anyway, Ristorante Formaggi is in this tiny building. Maybe an old row house they converted. It doesn’t seat that many. The tables are wobbly, and they have candles out that look like they’re a million years old. My mom said it w
as incredibly romantic. Like being in an old movie.” Lola bit her lip. “They used to go back there every year for their anniversary.”
“That’s sweet.”
“They even remembered what they got to eat. My dad had the eggplant parmesan and my mom had the gnocchi. She said it was almost as good as her mother’s. Almost, but not quite.”
“Now you’re making me hungry,” he said.
“So, after this amazing dinner of wonderful and authentic Italian food they went for a walk.”
“Wait, wait, wait.” Luke waved his hands. “I knew it was too good to be true.”
“What are you talking about?”
“They didn’t have dessert?”
She smiled. “Is that all you think of? Dessert?”
“Hell yes. And Italian places have some of the best. Tell me they got cannoli.”
“Sorry, they went for the tiramisu.”
“Everyone always does. But I’m telling you, splitting a cannoli is the way to go.”
“Do you want to hear the rest of this story or not?”
“I don’t know. I feel jaded now.” He leaned back against the bench.
“How about I let you change that one little detail. My parents split a damn cannoli.”
“That’s all I ask. Proceed. After they split their cannoli, they went for a walk.”
“Yes, they headed down by the Georgetown waterfront, along the Potomac River. They ended up at the Lincoln Memorial.”
“Everyone should see the monuments at night,” Luke said. They were a spectacular sight.
“Mom used to say that, too, but she always added that you should see them with someone you love.”
“Was that the end of the date?”
“Actually, no. They ended up talking. All night. In fact, they also got to see the sunrise over the monuments. Another thing that everyone should do according to my dad.”
Luke nodded. He’d tried to do that once at the end of his senior year of high school. He and a bunch of his friends woke at the buttcrack of dawn, trekked down to the monuments and set up camp to watch the sunrise. Unfortunately, it had been overcast that morning, and they’d never seen them.
Lola hit him lightly in the chest. “Can you imagine? A first date that is so amazing that you spend the entire night together.”
Luke wiggled his eyebrows, and Lola smacked him again. “Not like that, perv. They talked and talked. Can you imagine having that kind of chemistry with another person?”
He turned to face her fully. He looked past those glasses at the light blue of her eyes. He watched the way she spoke so passionately that her cheeks flushed. Yes, he could imagine having chemistry like that with someone. He was sitting with that someone right now.
“They knew that early,” Lola said. “They got that there was something special between them.”
Luke’s heart rate sped up. Hadn’t he just admitted to himself that he’d told Lola more tonight than he’d ever told anyone?
Shit. He was falling hard for her.
“Can you even fathom what that’s like?” she asked.
Luke honed in on her lips. Those perfect, pouty lips.
He didn’t think. He didn’t overanalyze. He just went for it.
Luke leaned toward her and pressed his mouth to hers. For one long moment, they stayed like that, lips pressed together on a bench in the middle of town. She shivered, and he pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her tightly. Then he kissed the hell out of her.
It was like every good sensation he’d ever experienced in his life came together to form this one perfect kiss. They were so in sync. But, of course, they would be. Their conversations were flawless. They had a good time together. So naturally their mouths were made for each other, too.
When he pulled back with much reluctance, he took a moment to push some of her bangs to the side. Really, it was to give himself some time to get his roaring pulse back to normal.
“I kissed you,” he said.
She let out a cute little sigh. “I noticed that.” Her voice was breathy, and the sound of it filled him with pride that he was the cause.
“To be clear, the reason I did it was because…well…”
She waited patiently. Or so it seemed. When he glanced down she was clenching and unclenching her fingers nervously.
“I didn’t kiss you because you were sad or angry or any other emotion. I kissed you because I couldn’t not kiss you in that moment.”
She let out a whoosh of breath. “Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh.”
“I’m not sure where this puts us,” she said, a line forming on her forehead. “You don’t do relationships and I, well, do. But we keep kissing.”
He ran a hand over his head. “How about we not think too hard about it. Let’s concentrate on my family reunion this weekend, and we’ll worry about the kissing later.”
Lola agreed. They walked back to her apartment, Ralphie in tow.
After he dropped her off with another stunner of a kiss goodnight, Luke took his time walking with the dog. He’d meant what he’d said to her. They should focus on his reunion this weekend. Because, honestly, if he let his mind think about her—really think about her—he would have to admit that he was in big trouble.
For the first time in forever, the word relationship didn’t seem quite so scary.
Chapter Seven
“Like we say in St. Olaf – Christmas without fruitcake is like St. Sigmund’s Day without the headless boy.”
-Rose Nylund
“Lola McBride, you are the most gorgeous woman on the planet, and your outfit blows all other outfits out of the water.”
Normally, she would have preened at the compliment, but at the moment, she chose to ignore Luke, who was impatiently yelling at her from the living room.
Men really didn’t understand. This was the big day. She was meeting his family. Not any ordinary family, either. Luke had told her who would be in attendance. All women. His mom, her two sisters, Luke’s triplet sisters, and a handful of cousins. Girl cousins.
What did she know about girls? That no matter how impressed they were with your conversation and wit, they would definitely dissect your outfit after you left.
“I thought you had picked something,” Luke said. He sounded closer, like he was right outside her door. “Didn’t you text me last night that Frankie helped you narrow down the options?”
“Yes,” she shouted back. “She helped me narrow it down to three choices.” She wrenched the door open to find Luke with one arm extended up above him to the top of the doorframe and the other roaming over his face.
“Everything you’ve shown me looks amazing. Besides, we’re going to a picnic in a park, not to visit the Queen of England.”
“Speaking of the picnic, are you sure what I’m bringing is okay?” She’d picked up a huge platter of fruit that morning.
“What? Oh yeah. Whatever. You didn’t need to bring anything.”
She pinned him with a stare. “This is the first time I’m meeting your mother. Of course I have to bring something. I was going to bake some cookies. I make pretty decent chocolate chip.” She began toying with different earrings, holding them up to her ears and checking it out in the mirror. “But you said your sister worked in a bakery. No way I can compete with that.”
Seemingly at home, Luke flopped down on her bed. “Do you worry about everything?”
“Yes,” she answered easily. “Guys never understand. It’s the little things that truly matter. Speaking of, maybe I should go with the other tank top.” She gnawed on her lip and then silently chastised herself because she’d just applied her lipstick.
He shot up. “No, don’t do it. You look amazing. Better than amazing. Phenomenal.” His brows drew together as he thought. “Spectacular.”
“Oh please.” She turned to her closet, which now didn’t hold much thanks to the piles of discarded options strewn throughout her room. She placed a finger to her lips as she considered. “I know.”
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“Lolaaaaa,” Luke said.
“No, just give me one minute. You can stay on my bed. I’ll run to the bathroom and slip this on.”
Okay, so it was more like five minutes than one, but Lola thought those three hundred seconds were totally worth it. The short leggings and long tank top with a glittery flower on it were perfect. Cool enough for an outdoor picnic. It was cute and fun without being too revealing.
She burst back into her room. Luke was holding a picture frame. He glanced up and a grin lit up his face.
“Hey, you look great.”
She did a little spin. “Not amazing, phenomenal, or spectacular,” she said teasingly.
He crossed to her. Cupping her cheek, he pulled her face to his and planted a soft kiss on her lips. It was such a boyfriend-y thing to do. Lola had to work hard to keep the sigh in.
When he moved to end the kiss, she indulged by deepening the connection. She opened her mouth and welcomed his eager tongue. Their arms twined around each other as they moved even closer. He smelled so good. Like soap from his morning shower and a fresh, earthy scent from his cologne. She could just eat him up, which might happen if she let the kiss go on any longer. Regretfully, she pulled back.
“You must really like this outfit,” she said lightly, even though she was actually feeling quite serious. Good thing he was holding her, because her knees were about to buckle.
“You should see what I do if you pick the right shoes.”
She laughed as she threw some of her clothes back into her closet. She hated leaving a messy room behind.
“Hey, Lola,” he said softly.
She turned back to him. His face was serious.
“Thanks for doing this. It, uh, really means a lot to me.”
She nodded. “You’re welcome.”
After another couple minutes of grabbing everything she would need, including switching purses, they were ready to go. Off to meet the family of her pretend boyfriend.
Her Super-Secret Rebound Boyfriend Page 8