by Tia Siren
She fished around in her purse and came back up with an e-cigarette. She stuck it in her mouth and took a long pull. “I get that.”
“Yeah?” He had said those very same words to Riley more than once, and hearing the dismissive remark from someone else only made him feel like more of an asshole. Deep down, Gray knew exactly what Riley was up to when she visited Jon’s office. He understood that she was trying to help, but for some reason he turned on her and allowed all the anger he felt rise up and spew out all over her.
The redhead put a hand on his knee. “I bet I can make your day better.”
Why not? he considered. After all, Riley’s gone, and she’s never coming back. I made damn sure of that, didn’t I? he thought, certain he’d blown the best thing he’d ever known. “Okay then,” he said, slurring a little more. “Lead the way.”
Chapter 25
“You bastard!”
The shouted curse was accompanied by a wad of clothes being hurled violently over the railing.
Gray, in nothing but a pair of plaid boxers, grabbed his shirt and shorts and ducked as a shoe came flying toward his head. Sure it was too late to apologize, he shimmied into his shorts while more four-letter words rang out from the balcony above him. Lights came on in the condo windows as he took off in a barefoot limp across the steaming asphalt, trying his best not to laugh. The whole thing really was a bad idea, and he knew it from the get-go. He couldn’t just fuck Riley out of his mind and heart. She had a hold on him, and that hold went beyond his dick. Even that part of him showed no interest in the redhead, no matter how ready, willing, and horny she was.
“Damn it,” he muttered with a scowl as he reached the end of the sidewalk and saw a road with only sticky wire grass beyond. A foot full of prickly briars was the last thing he needed. I never shoulda left the bar with… What was her name again? Did she even tell me? Hell, I didn’t even ask.
He had hoped a little rough sex with a stranger would ease his mind, but he stayed as limp as a deflated balloon the whole time, and as if that wasn’t bad enough he actually started laughing right in the middle of her blowjob attempt. Of course she didn’t see the humor in it, and he knew he was quite lucky she didn’t stab him. Not that I don’t deserve to be murdered or some other crazy shit.
He walked faster, trying to ignore the thorny invasion on the skin of his bare foot. “You can’t spend your whole life hoping to get laid by some nice, understanding woman. You have to fuckin’ move on, Gray,” he scolded himself but those words brought him no comfort, nor did they ease the throbbing agony in his heart. There was a huge hole in his chest, a hollow feeling that seemed to permeate him clear to the edges of his body. He wanted to hold her again, wanted to feel her hair in his hands and the shape of her mouth against his. He wanted to watch her sleep, to listen to her laugh as she tried to fish.
The resort loomed up ahead. He passed through the gates and trudged toward the apartment.
“There you are,” his dad said, giving him a cautious stare from the couch.
“Yeah, here I am,” Gray said nonchalantly, much too weary to try to talk things out. He knew his dad had told Riley a lot of painful truths, and he hated the fact that she probably pitied him. Somehow that only made things worse.
“We need to talk,” his dad announced before Gray could walk away.
Gray turned back around. “I don’t have a clue what you could possibly wanna talk about. I mean, you ran off a potential investor—you know, the woman you tried to pimp me out to, the one you practically demanded I crawl into bed with. You managed to embarrass the shit outta me and caused us to fight. She’s never coming back, and you’ll never see a damn Lincoln penny from her family. If you’re thinking you can talk me into getting her back, you need to know you’re shit outta luck. I hope that about covers it, because I’m pretty fucking tired right now.”
His father stood still as a statue, staring down at Gray. “No, Gray, that doesn’t cover it. Look, I was pissed at you, but I was unprofessional with her. You’re right. I blew it, but maybe that’s not such a bad thing.”
“What?! How can you even say that?” Gray asked, stunned that his father could be so flippant and callous about it.
“We have a buyer.”
“Huh? So now you’re sellin’ the place?”
His dad ran his hand through his hair. “I can sell now, let the new owners deal with the second site as part of the sale, and actually be able to afford to retire, or I can try to keep going and end up with nothing. My choice is pretty clear. I’m selling, and it’ll close quick: three weeks and done.”
Gray shook his head. “How long have you been planning this?’
“For a while. That was where Jeff was, talking to the new owners to broker a deal.”
Slow anger simmered up again. “Wait. Are you tellin’ me that this whole thing with Riley was… Damn it, you mean you only did that as a contingency plan? A backup, hedging your bets in case Jeff screwed up? Thanks. Thanks a whole helluva fucking lot! I tried to stay away from her because I didn’t want her to get hurt, and when she came out of your office, all I could think was that… Well, I guess I thought the two of you somehow pulled something over on me, that you were going behind my back, ganging up on me to keep me here when this is the last place on Earth I want to be.”
“I know,” his dad said, giving him a crooked grin that Gray wanted to smack right off his face. “I guess now you don’t have to be. See? A win-win,” he said with a shrug.
“A win for who? Sure as hell not for me and not for Riley! But you don’t even care about that, do you? You don’t care that I put everything into this place, that I destroyed everything because I just couldn’t understand why she came to see you. I thought she pitied me, and do you know why I thought that? Because I heard what you told her! You don’t owe me shit, and I’m okay with taking nothing from you, but the least you could do is be a little more grateful for all the hard work I’ve put in here.” Gray paused and then shook his head. “No, forget that. You don’t even have to be grateful. When you took this place over from Grandpa, he said it would only be a matter of time before you screwed it up. You should be proud of yourself for proving him right. Just go on and retire…and good luck with that.”
His father’s jaw tensed. “How dare you.”
Gray snapped, “You could have just let me live with Mom’s folks, you know.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Jon started. “You don’t—”
“I used to believe you didn’t send me there because you loved me,” Gray said, cutting him off. “I thought you loved me enough that the past didn’t matter, but I should’ve known better. You didn’t do it out of love. You did it so you could keep me here, so you could get even by torturing me every day, rubbing my nose in all that shit about not being your kid. You worked me like a slave and never gave me a dime beyond room and board. You gave Jeff plenty, and you always will because he’s actually yours. That’s cool, and I get it. I don’t want anything from you except to see you keep living your miserable, rotten life.”
“You’ve always been shit. Get your stuff—”
“Don’t bother telling me I have to move. I’ll pack now. I’m done with you. I’m done with this family. I’m done with all of it!”
“Good, you ungrateful little shit!” his father shouted. “You had every reason to earn your keep around here!”
“Do you hear yourself?” Gray said, not even angry anymore. All of that had dissipated and something else festered up beneath it, something he couldn’t even describe. He didn’t know what it was, but it felt good. “I’m not Mom. What she did was not my fault, none of it—not even going out in that damn storm and leaving me with you. I wasn’t at fault at all, yet you’ve made me pay for it my whole life, and a helluva life it’s been, Pops. I loved you, like a damn fool. I really did, right up until this morning. I loved you, respected you, and hoped that maybe, just maybe, you’d one day figure out I was a son to you, no matter
how I got here. I’m sorry you never felt the same way, but thank you for selling this place. Now I can move on without anything on my conscience. I mean, I know a conscience is a foreign concept to you, but hopefully you understand what I’m saying.”
“Damn it, Gray,” his father swore. “If you really think I purposely set out to hurt you—”
“I’m 100% right. Maybe you’re too self-involved to see it. I don’t care anymore. I’m done.” Without another word, he hurried to his room and hastily packed his things. Ever since he’d come home from college, his life had basically consisted of working at the bar day after day, so most of his clothes were still packed. He didn’t have much, just a couple suitcases. He had a few thousand dollars in the bank and a couple hundred in his wallet. His degree would carry him somewhere, though, and he was sure there were other places that would hire him. Costa Rica maybe, he ventured, or the Virgin Islands…anywhere where the wind is warm and the sun is bright. He didn’t care where it was, as long as it was far away from that resort in Florida where he’d wasted too much of his life for a man who didn’t care about him at all, a place where he could start over and be somebody, out of the shadow of his family.
In just ten minutes, his whole life was all packed up. He wanted to leave right away, but where would he go at three in the morning? He was still half-lit and exhausted. Suddenly, his bed had never looked quite so good. He heard his father and Jeff going to bed and he sighed and lay down, trying to quiet his brain and think of what to do next.
A cruise ship? he considered. The Keys, south of here? I could just take a job at one of the smaller resorts until I save up enough to go somewhere else, maybe lever that experience into a better job somewhere, with better pay and…
The thoughts about his future were suddenly cut short when Riley wandered into his mind again. He desperately wanted to talk to her, but she wouldn’t answer her phone, and he knew she had probably already blocked his number or changed hers. He couldn’t blame her, of course, deciding he probably would have done the same thing if he was her. He lay in bed, staring up at the dark ceiling and wincing as he ran over everything he’d said to her in his hurt and anger.
She’d forgiven him for so much already. She’d taken a huge chance in skipping her flight and coming back with him from the airport, yet in the end he nearly got her killed. As if that wasn’t bad enough, he sent her running off in anger and pain when he decided to argue with her because she had the unmitigated gall to care enough about him to try to secure his future for him. There was no way she would ever talk to him again. She’d have to be a fool, he thought, and he knew Riley Teeters was not that.
Chapter 26
“As you can see, the building has good features. The lobby, while small, is impeccable.”
Riley managed to smile at the enthusiastic realtor, Dan Brown, as they walked through the lobby of a giant, towering condo. It was the last thing she wanted to be doing just then; she had no desire to look for or live in an expensive apartment in the big city, but she also had no idea how to get out of it. Just like always, her future seemed to be set in stone, cementing her in place.
She’d tried it, her little adventure. It was not at all what her parents wanted for her, and it hadn’t worked out, but she’d tried. She’d learned her lesson, and she wouldn’t oppose them again. She just didn’t have it in her to be a rebel, even if she did have a cause.
As they stepped into the elevator, Dan said, “As you can see, you would have a private entry. These doors actually open to the apartment, and the tenant who occupies the penthouse has a separate elevator from the tenants on lower floors.” He ran one hand down the burled walnut and nodded smugly. “Privacy is guaranteed, as is the best security we can offer.”
“How wonderful,” she recited robotically, with zero enthusiasm in her heart or words. She had been unable to sleep all night, and she was far too tired to jump through all the hoops of proper protocol, but she was also not willing to refuse her father’s wishes again. She had to spend her money somewhere, and a place of her own would have some benefits, or at least she hoped so. Home is where the heart is, she thought. Her heart certainly wasn’t there, and it would never be home to her, but at least it would be hers.
After the monotonous tour, they stepped out to the sidewalk, and Dan asked, “Well? Are you impressed?”
Riley managed to summon a smile that the realtor quickly returned. “I’ve got a lot to think about. Let me consider what we looked at today, and I’ll call you tomorrow to let you know if I want one of these or would like to look elsewhere,” she said.
Dan nodded eagerly, smelling money in the water. “Perfect. Have a good day, Miss Teeter.”
“I will.” She cast an eye down the street and was glad to see she’d shaken the stupid bodyguards, though it was only because Dan picked her up in his car to take her house-hunting. “I think I’m gonna go visit Versace, so there’s no need for you to drive me home. I can call for our car when I’m ready.”
Dan gave her a wide smile and walked away.
Riley walked in the direction of the famous shop for a moment, then quickly sidestepped and instead journeyed toward the small park nearby. She wasn’t interested in maxing out her credit card again. She really just wanted to be alone and think, and she couldn’t stand the sight of the four walls of her bedroom anymore. She hoped sitting on a bench for a while in the fresh air, with all the people walking by, would make her feel more at home. Unfortunately, it proved an unfruitful attempt; absorbing the flavors and vibes of the city only reinforced her longing to be anywhere but there.
No, not anywhere. I want to be…with him, with Gray, she finally admitted to herself when she saw a happy couple walking by. “Could you be any more of a glutton for punishment?” she muttered.
The old man sitting on the bench next to her gave her a stern look over the top of his newspaper, clearly dismayed at what he must have perceived was an attempt to start a conversation.
That was another thing she disliked about the city. Nobody spoke unless they had to. In Florida, everyone had nodded or said hi or something. The world there was filled with tiny little encounters and conversations, and she missed that almost as much as she missed the warm water she’d never thought she would like, much less love to swim in.
She got up and started walking. The streets were jam-packed with pedestrian traffic, and the roads were really no different, full of noisy, honking cars with passengers and drivers shouting curses and sticking their middle fingers out their windows. She walked faster through that concrete and neon jungle, trying to not think at all, but just as it had all night long, her mind insisted on fixating on Gray and their horrible ending.
She reached her building, and her feet halted.
Her breath caught when she saw thought she saw Gray standing a short distance away, leaning against the building and looking down at his phone.
Then she heard his ringtone, the one she couldn’t bear to delete yet. Tears sprang into her eyes, and she swallowed hard. She resisted the urge to run to him, and calmly walked up as he turned his head, gazing in the opposite direction. “Gray? What’re you doing here?”
He turned his head to look at her and pulled the phone away from his ear. “I-I left the resort,” he said, with a hopeful light dancing in his eyes. “Dad—Jon—sold the resort.”
“Okay…”
“Look, Riley, I gotta tell you that I’m dead broke. I won’t see a dime from the sale of that place. I’m staying in a hostel, and I’ve got no idea what I’m gonna do for a paycheck, but I wanna live somewhere warm and tropical and… Hell, I’ll live wherever, honestly, as long as it’s with you.”
“Gray, I—” she tried to cut in, but the words continued to spill out of him.
“I’m so sorry, Riley. Again. I don’t know what else to say. I can’t even figure out how to confess. I know I’m a lousy human being who never shoulda let you go. I let my pride get in the way down there, and I… Well, I’m just sorry, that’s al
l.”
Riley gawked at him for a moment, then did what she wished she had done in the airport. Without a second thought, she threw herself into his arms and kissed him so hard she felt like her lips were going to bruise. It hurt, but it hurt in the very best of ways.
They only broke away from the kiss when an elderly woman walked by and snarled something under her breath.
She stared up at Gray. “How… I mean, how did you get here?”
“I flew, and boy are my arms tired,” he said. His smile was ready, but there were lines of fatigue on his face. “I’m so sorry, Riley. I mean it.”
“Me, too. I should’ve told you I was going to talk to your dad. I had hoped to surprise you. I didn’t know…” she shrugged, “I didn’t know you had a lot of crap on your shoulders as well. We’re both kind of a mess, aren’t we?”
“Sometimes messes are good.” He gave her a hopeful smile.
“Your dad… Jon… he kicked you out and didn’t offer you a dime?”
“I’m okay with him not giving me anything. I mean, I could probably fight him for something, but what’s the point? He’ll never bend on it, because he’s a greedy son-of-a-bitch. As for the rest of it, I don’t need him to pretend to love me anymore. I don’t need him, or that resort, in order to feel like I belong someplace in the world.”
“No?” she asked, feeling hope swell within her.
“No.” He held her close. “I’ve got you, Riley, and I know you love me. That’s all I need. I hope that’s all you need, too, because I don’t have anything else to give you. Is it enough?”
“Your love is more than enough, Gray.” She stepped back from him and took a long, deep breath. “The question is, where do we go from here? I hate it here, even though I never realized it before. I figured it out when I came back. I want the same things you want, all that warm sand and salt water and sunshine. I want anything and everything but this,” she said, skimming her hand upward at the tiptop of a skyscraper.