by Tia Siren
She wanted to be excited about that, about starting over in New York and putting all the heartache and bitterness behind her, but it seemed so far away. Gray was up there in that hospital, and even if she had been thrown out of his room, she couldn’t bear to leave him alone in Lake Tahoe, a place he didn’t even ask to visit. “Can you arrange for his things to be delivered and a plane ticket for him to, uh…” She trailed off, not even sure where he wanted to go. She didn’t want to leave him, but he’d sent her away, and he’d made it clear that they were over. She had to harden her heart like he had hardened his, but she wasn’t sure if she could do that.
“I will make sure he gets safely…somewhere,” Richard said, taking her arm. As they set off across the lot, toward the idling limo, he assured her, “I am sorry that went the way it did, but it will get easier, dear.”
Riley climbed into the back, and her head fell back on the seat. “I know you aren’t the least bit sorry, Dad, so please don’t say you are,” she said, staring out the window and not even bothering to look at him. “I know better, so let’s not lie to each other, okay? I’m only leaving because Gray told me to, not because you did. All things considered, you don’t have my vote…on this or in the next election.”
Richard sighed. “That aside, what’s done is done, and now you can get back to normal.”
Get back to normal? She snorted, unable to even speak the words.
The limo cruised away from the lot, and Riley held on to the seat in a death grip, as if she was riding a rollercoaster. She knew it was a mistake to leave, because they belonged together. She knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt, and deep down, she knew Gray knew it too. Maybe it’s best though, she thought. After all, there’s been so much wrong between us lately. I was bound to get hurt either way, right? Of course, she knew that all along, right from the start. The pain she was feeling was expected, a deep, miserable agony that she almost could not breathe around. She knew she had to, though, or die from it. The pain was not just in her heart either. There was a lead weight in her gut, with jagged little edges that threatened to cut her to shreds with every breath she did manage.
The sky was blue in an almost mocking way; it should have been gray and full of rainclouds. Her Gray, the love of her life, had given her a final goodbye, and she knew he meant it, and it seemed cruel that Mother Nature didn’t even commiserate with her.
He had always come after her before, no matter what, even up there on that trail. Now, though, she was the reason for his pain, and it wasn’t just because of that fall. She never intended to harm him, but with every mile the limo drove, she knew she was hurting him more. How can I do this, just leave without one more word between us, after all we’ve been through together, all we’ve shared? She was leaving, though, even if it did not seem possible. Gray himself had left her no choice.
As their journey continued, Riley stared at the plane on the tarmac. It was still not too late to try to make things right. I could and should go back to the hospital right now and tell him I’m not about to leave without a fight. I know I can make him see how deep my love is, she told herself, but she really wasn’t that sure. Too much resentment and little, petty things had come between them, and those had boiled out of them both in a frothy spew of hateful words on that cold mountaintop. Those words were so harsh and terrible that she feared there was no way to take them back or put the love back into what was broken. But is there a way? she asked herself as the mechanics scurried to check out the plane. No, not at all.
She climbed the steps wearily. She had not said one word to her father since they first climbed into the limo, and she had no intention of conversing with him. The plane took off, and the mountains receded below her. Riley just sat there, stunned, dazed, and too heartbroken to even cry.
Gone. It’s all just…gone. Gray, her future, and all the things she had wanted with him had faded away, just like that landscape below. Gone, for good, she thought as the last recognizable mountain peak became invisible below.
Chapter 40
Gray stared at the scene before him, taking in the waving and whispering palm fronds, indigo and emerald water, and young women spilling out of their skimpy bikinis. Sailboats and motorboats bounced around on and cruised through the water, and the sunlight seemed to strike a cache of gold coins along the tops of the waves. Heat pressed against his back. The cast on his left arm made him miserable, and his skin itched beneath the mummification. Sweat slid down his skin and into the plaster, causing such an intense and unreachable irritation that he wanted to scream in frustration.
“Hey there.” Jeff plopped down on the sand beside him and held out an icy beer. “Thirsty, man?”
“Seriously.” Gray took the beer and sipped it, still staring moodily at the breakwater.
Jeff shifted. “I guess you’re still pissed, huh?’
“Nope,” Gray said, as he’d given up on being hurt and angry, because those bitter emotions had been eating him alive for far too long.
Jeff shifted, and sand spilled toward Gray’s solidly planted feet.
Gray tilted the bottle to his lips, drank deeply, then asked, “Did you come out here just for a mood check or what?”
“Maybe.” Jeff took a small gulp of his own, then planted the bottle in the sand. “Look, what happened was fucked up.”
“You mean you and Jon trying to cut me out or the sale not going through?”
“A little of both.” Jeff shifted again and sighed heavily. “Shit, man, that was a shit thing to do, any way ya look at it. I hope you know I was in your corner though.”
“Well, you did send me the plane fare,” Gray said, closing his eyes. When he did, a thin red tint clouded his vision, just behind his eyelids. His arm itched again, and the sand ground against his bare legs. “I don’t wanna talk about it, okay? I mean, I get it. I do. You and him… You’re both stuck, facing massive bankruptcy. We’re all fucked. I just need a place to stay until I figure out what happens next.”
“Well, Dad says it’ll take about a year for them to actually give us the boot after the bills all come due. We’ve gotta shut the resort down though. We can’t afford to staff or run it.”
“I’d say you can’t afford not to, but what do I know?”
Jeff rested his head on his hands for a second. “Dude, I get it. I mean, if it was just me, I’d say let’s just do it, because you’re right. Trouble is, this place ain’t mine. It’s Dad’s, and he’s acting like some stupid captain in an old war movie, determined to down with his sinking ship. He’s never listened to a single idea of mine, and, believe it or not, I’ve had some good ones.”
“Yeah, I know that feeling.” Gray shut one eye against the glare of the sun before opening it again to peer over at Jeff. “I don’t know what his deal is.”
Jeff shrugged. “Beats me, man. He’s… It’s almost like he can’t wait for it all to go up in flames, just so he can sit back and watch it burn. This is our home, ya know? It’s not just mine and his but yours, and it’s like he wants to see it fail, like he wants us to fail too.”
“Of course he does.” Gray rubbed his forehead with one hand, wondering—and not for the first time—why he hadn’t just taken the pay-off from Riley’s dad. His pride and his love for her hadn’t gotten him anywhere. Three fucking million dollars, he thought with a shake of his head. If I’da taken that, I could have bought this resort for a song, set it up the way I want, and worked my ass off to make it fly—maybe not as high as Jon wants, but still…
“I think it’s because Gramps started it,” Jeff said. “I mean, Dad never had to do anything for it, never really had to work for it. It was a hand-me-down, somethin’ he just fell into, and I don’t think he’s ever really cared about it.”
“Or me,” Gray muttered before another sip of his beer. It was bitter and yeasty and icy cold, a welcome relief from the salty air and humidity that coated his throat. “I didn’t realize you give a damn either.”
“Seriously?” Jeff asked, arching his
brow. “How can you even say that to me? I’ve always been part of this gig. No, Dad didn’t give me the shit work he gave you, but I’ve been involved. He’s always believed your more cut out for…behind the scenes, while I’m better off in the front of the house.”
“Behind the scenes? More like…outta the picture,” Gray retorted.
“Yeah, well, you’ve got a point, I guess. I mean, I never understood that until lately. Truth is, Dad really does pretty much hate your guts, and he always has. I’m sorry to say that, but it’s true. The way I see it, you’re still my brother. We came from the same mom, right? I’m sorry I haven’t always been there for you, like a good brother should,” Jeff said solemnly. “I can’t change that now, and neither can you, but maybe we can work together to figure out what to do, preferably before all this just…implodes,”
Gray looked over at him curiously. “What are you thinking, Jeff? I’m dead broke. I can’t even pay rent, much less help with the bills. Jon will never be anything but an asshole to me, and it’s hard as hell to live here because of that, but to be honest, I don’t have anywhere else to go. I’m not sure what I can do to help this place when my own reality’s so full of shit right now. I’m gonna have to get a job, so I can save up enough money to get a place of my own. Beyond that, I’m not really thinking about the future too much.”
“That’s sort of my plan too.”
“Great. At least there’s that,” Grant said, slanting his gaze over to his half-brother again. “Dude, aren’t you even a little worried about your dad?”
“Not at all,” Jeff said with another sigh. “I mean, I wanna be, but I know he only cares about saving his own ass. Matter fact, I think he’s been siphoning money from the resort, feathering his own little nest, so to speak. He cut the staff back again, and more people quit. Guests are still coming in, but it’s becoming increasingly apparent how much this place sucks and lacks in customer service. Stuff is breaking and is all run down, and it’s almost scary how fast it’s falling apart. Dad’s got that little embezzled nest egg, though, and I bet he plans to skip outta here without ever looking back, as soon as he can. So, to answer your question, no, I’m not worried about him. I’m too worried about myself right now. I don’t have access to the funds, don’t even have a freaking bank account of my own. When this place comes crashing down, which it will, I’ll get nothing but a bad rep and no pay for all the years of working like a dog. So again, we’re in the same leaky-ass boat, no matter who our sperm donors were,” he continued sourly, scrunching up his face. “Look, I know you don’t have to side with me, and I really can’t blame you if you don’t after all the shit you’ve been through with Dad and this family, but—”
“It’s okay,” Gray chimed in with a shrug. “I’ve gotta side with someone, so it might as well be you.”
Jeff finished his beer. “Good. When do you want to start putting the ol’ résumés together?”
“Tomorrow,” Gray said, much too tired to deal with it yet, just as weary in spirit as he was in body.
He broke into silent thought as he stared back out at the water. How is this possible? he thought. I was just a young guy not too long ago, ready to start my life, and now it feels like my life is over. The whole thing with Riley—falling in love, tackling a dream that turned into a nightmare, the accident, and everything else—had done him in. He’d grown up in ways he never wanted to and far too quickly at that. Not only that, but in the process, he’d lost her, something else he didn’t want to do. It was Riley who insisted on sailing waters she was unsure of, but he knew he bore the blame for that as well. All along, she missed her family and her life of luxury, and she would never have that with him.
His honest opinion was that she really, really missed being rich. He, on the other hand, was broke. His family business had gone tits up, and he didn’t have any stake in it anyway, due to Jon’s hard feelings about him. Now, he’d be lucky to land a job at some two-bit, by-the-hour hooker hotel, manning the desk or working the bar. Tourist traps were full of people with business degrees and life experience, all slugging it out for whatever menial jobs they could find, and to make matters worse, most of those jobs were seasonal at best.
Life had taken Gray right to hell and back, and he had no idea how to get it back on the rails. Really, it didn’t even seem to be worth trying to fix, as his future looked just as bleak. He tried to remain hopeful though. Maybe getting a job and getting out of this place will help me pull myself back together, he thought. Hell, maybe I’ll even find love again. It’s not unheard of, right? He doubted it, but there was a possibility, and all he could do was hang his hopes on that.
Even as he thought that, though, images of Riley filtered through his head: walking toward him that first day, asking him to make her a drink, lounging on the deck of Maggie after they made love, reuniting with him on that honking nightmare of a New York City street. He vividly recalled her laughter and the way her pretty face lit up with it as they embarked on what they were both sure was going to be the adventure of a lifetime, their endless summer.
Gray felt he had made too many mistakes, and he blamed most of them on his inflated pride. He had lost her, shoved her away, and he knew going after her again was pointless. She was as far gone from him as if she had decamped to the moon. Riley Teeters was back in the safe little cocoon of money and power and all that ritzy shopping, no doubt at some overpriced boutique, where every bag on the shelves was one of a kind and anyone who had to ask how much anything cost was already out of the game.
“So I take it she hasn’t called, huh?” Jeff broke in, as if he could read Gray’s aching thoughts.
Gray could not stand the sympathy he heard in Jeff’s voice, like salt in an open, bleeding wound, and his voice was gruff as a result. “No, but who cares? I mean, I don’t expect her to. Why would she? What we had is done, over. It was just one of those dumb summer things, and it isn’t summer anymore, bro.”
“I can’t believe the things you two did. I mean, y’all are crazy.”
Gray sighed. Crazy really was the best word. The two of them had turned love around and twisted it, forced its hand till it turned in on itself and snapped, and he was just as guilty of it as she was. There was no point in trying to deny his share of the blame, nor could he look away from her part in it either. It was what it was, and it was over now. He nodded and answered, “Well, anyway, tomorrow you and me… Let’s go out and get ourselves a couple of jobs so we can put some sort of crash pad under our quickly falling butts.”
Jeff stood, and sand spilled off his legs and jeans as he looked out at the sea. “Yeah, okay,” he said before he walked off.
Gray sighed and turned his eyes back to the rippling waves. Immediately, the memory of the heart-stopping cold waters of that lake hit him, making him shiver.
As the surf ponded mercilessly against the shore, his eyes went back to the people on the beach, the dead season visitors, all those imports from frozen climes, willing to believe that seventy-degree weather was warm. Earlier that day, a woman from Minnesota had told him she’d driven out of a snowstorm to get there, and she could not believe she was wearing shorts and a bikini top or that he was wearing jeans. Those were the people who swam in heated pools instead of the cool waters of the Gulf, people who either couldn’t afford the high seasons or hated the crowds. There was money there, in that dead season, but Gray knew it would slump off before long. Then what?
Already, the place had taken on the haunted look of a ghost town. The city hunkered down in its little quiet, its shops shuttered all up and down the strip. People would only be out on the beach for a few hours, when the sunrays were strongest; many were already drifting back to their rooms, to change and head out to find a decent meal somewhere, something they certainly wouldn’t get at the resort. Most of the beach-side eateries and kiosks were already closed for winter, and only those situated on the other side of the bridge were open for business, since they managed by serving the locals all year long. The hotels an
d other resorts had plenty of vacancies, but still, none of them were going under as fast as Jon’s was.
How fitting, Gray thought as he looked around at the sleepy place, folding itself shut. How perfect for everything to be over, for winter to be hard on my heels and summer to fade into nothing more than a burnished memory. It was nearing December, and soon, everything about the sunny months would be little more than a dim memory. In a way, he hoped Riley would also melt out of his mind.
He ambled to his feet on the sand and began plodding back toward the resort. His arm continued to itch and ache, in spite of the medication they gave him, which didn’t abate it at all. He walked slowly, his bare feet sinking into sand that was already cooling. A stiff wind picked up, sending the brave souls on the beach and by the pool running for shelter. The sky darkened fast, like it always did in winter.
Gray limped along faster, frustrated by his slow, recuperating body. His only solace was that his body would heal in time his heart, on the other hand, was another story.
Chapter 41
Riley set a large file aside and looked up from her desk. The view outside the windows was stunning, all Manhattan skyline and a glimpse of the cold, gray sky above. She loved that spectacular and familiar panorama, dismal as it was to some.
She sighed and leaned back in her chair. Her eyes closed as she was once again assaulted by that same dull ache she’d felt ever since she had walked out of Gray’s hospital room. His words constantly rang in her ears, telling her to go, telling her they weren’t good for each other and that they had to end it before one of them really got hurt. She almost had to laugh at that; she was really hurt anyway, and there was no way around that.
A knock on the door interrupted her gloomy thoughts.
“Come in,” she called out.
Marge, her assigned assistant, stepped in, her red hair neatly coiled and her freckles hidden below a light coating of mineral makeup. “Ms. Teeters, I have the daily reports for you. Also, there’s a meeting with the head of the Foundation, and…” She paused and shuffled through a pile of papers, wrinkling her brow in confusion. “Um, I’m so sorry, but it seems I somehow missed noting exactly which Foundation.”