“Maybe not but she is our best chance. Why don't we make it her choice?”
“No. It is my choice, and I say she is not doing this,” I growled, taking a step toward the man, ready to show him what I thought of his plan.
Cece quickly stepped between us, facing me. “You can’t make this decision for me, Jordan,” she said before turning to Parker. “What are we talking about?”
“We want you to stay close to Rafe. To be clear, I'm not asking you to sleep with him, just get close enough that he trusts you.”
My fists clenched.
“She can’t handle this,” I said.
“Give the girl some credit. She found you, didn't she?” He looked at Cece. “I’ll be giving Jordan instructions, and he’ll pass them along to you. I promise not to put you into any danger.”
“I’ll do it,” she said quickly.
Before I could protest, Parker touched his ear. “I gotta go.” He nodded to Cece. “Welcome to the team. We’ll be in touch.”
Once Parker walked away, Cece turned to me. “Start talking,” she spat, like she was the one with a reason to be upset.
“Come on,” I said and grabbed her arm. I took her to a bar down the street, and we sat in a booth in the back.
I ordered a whiskey and Cece a water. She stayed quiet, simply staring me down with those stubborn jade eyes until I started talking.
“I joined the army out of high school. We were on tour in Iraq when my CO noticed my talent with computers. I was recruited into a program run by the CIA.”
“So, you were like a secret agent?” she asked.
“No, I was an analyst, and I technically was not a CIA member. I was on loan from the army,” I explained.
She leaned in. “So, what happened?”
“Do you remember the surge in Iraq?” I asked.
“The what?”
I shook my head. “Fuck. I forget how young you are,” I said. “In the Iraq war, the US sent thousands of troops into Iraq, mainly Baghdad. It was meant to help protect the civilians while the Iraqis got their shit together. During that time, units swept entire neighborhoods to secure the city. On one of those sweeps, a Marine unit heard screaming coming from what they thought was an abandoned building. They found a bunker filled with weapons, ammunition, heroin, and twelve girls all under the age of sixteen, all dying from dehydration. It's safe to assume that whoever was running the place was forced to abandon it when more troops showed up.”
She licked her lips. “Who were the girls?”
“Iraqis that were simply taken off the street. War makes it easy to steal people, especially children,” I said, looking away.
Cece stayed quiet, so I continued.
“Anyway, among all that they found a laptop and it was sent to the CIA. After their first look, they realized that they would need a team of analysts to decrypt the information. It took me and three other guys about six months to wade through all the false data and mirrors they erected. But once we did, we found the most sophisticated international slave trade ever seen.”
“Slavery?”
I simply nodded. I didn’t want to go into details about the number of slaves being traded or how they were valued. It would only serve to scare her.
“What did the CIA do?” she asked.
“Soon after, the whole network went dark. They must have known that we were on to them. We managed to figure out a couple of big names in the business, one of them was Silvito Digali.”
“Rafe's dad?”
I nodded. “We had no idea where Digali was, but Rafe was trying to make a name for himself in underground boxing.”
“This was when you went undercover,” she said.
I nodded slowly.
“Why you?”
“Digali's network was sophisticated, with some of the most advanced coding I'd ever seen. If there was a chance to get close to Digali, they would need someone who could understand it. Parker chose me because I was also the only one that could pass for a real boxer. I got myself into some of the amateur fights and worked my way up. It was a few months before I even met Rafe. When I proved myself to be the best fighter, he put me on his team. From there we became friends, but he hardly ever mentioned his dad.”
“And what about his sister?”
I glanced at her in surprise and then cursed Rafe for the hundredth time tonight. “She let her attraction be known, and Parker encouraged me to get close to her. Much like he did to you tonight.” Except Parker gave me permission to sleep with Cara from the very beginning. But it was different for me. I knew how to keep sex and feelings separate. I stared at Cece for a long moment, hoping she wouldn’t make me go into detail about my relationship with Cara. I had wanted Cara as much as she wanted me, but she was nothing special, not like the girl glaring at me across the table.
The waitress came back with our drinks, and Cece took a sip of her water. “What happened after that?”
“We were six months into the job when Rafe began to trust me and he asked for help with the books and security. His father oversaw the operation, but it was Rafe’s baby. I managed to access Digali’s network through Rafe’s laptop and began feeding all the info I could back to Parker. At first, it was simply information that could eventually lead to an arrest. They didn’t want to tip him off until we had enough to ensure his conviction. But I found an email indicating the arrival of several dozen slaves in the US. I sent it to Parker, and his superiors agreed that they could not ignore the opportunity to save them. If done correctly, we could save the people and gain enough evidence to finally arrest Digali.
“But before I could confirm Parker’s plan, Digali’s whole operation was gone overnight. I got a phone call from Rafe telling me that he and his sister had to leave the country, but he'd be in touch. I stayed around a few months, still playing the part, but they eventually pulled the plug on the whole thing and I was sent back to the army.”
“Did someone tip off Digali?” she asked.
I shrugged. “It was probably someone in the CIA that was in his pocket. We may never know.”
She nodded and took another drink of water. She set it down and looked into the water as she asked, “Why did they ask you to come back now?”
“Rafe just showed up in Vegas a few months ago and wanted to restart the fights. The CIA found out he was asking around for me. After all these years, Parker says they have enough evidence to arrest Digali, but he needs to be on US soil to do it.”
“What if it was just a trap to get you here? What if Digali knew you were the mole?” she asked, her eyes wide.
“If they wanted me dead, they could have done it by now.”
“But still—”
“I know. It was a risk coming back,” I said taking her hand. “But it was an opportunity to end it forever. If Digali is at large, they would use it as an excuse to keep coming after me. There is also the chance that if he did know about me, you could be in danger.” I decided not to tell her about the threat to Izzy, too.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked, tugging her hand out of mine.
“I thought it would be easier if you simply hated me. That way, if something happened…” I trailed off, unsure how to finish.
She just stared at me, angry and sad all at once.
Then she looked away. “It must be hard, playing a role, lying, especially to people you like,” she said after a few moments.
“You think I like Rafe?” I asked.
“Yeah.”
I smiled. “I did, until he started sniffing after you.”
“I like Rafe, too.” I growled in frustration. “Not like that,” she said quickly. “But as a person. He actually reminds me of Greg.”
“How so?”
“He has something to prove. He talks about his father like Greg talked about you.”
I leaned back in shock. “Greg wanted to prove something to me? Why?”
She shrugged and leaned back against the booth. “He never had a real dad. You were
the closest thing.”
I closed my eyes, wondering if anything else could make me feel shitty tonight.
I took her hand again, holding it tight this time. “I beg you, Cece. Go back to Clayton and let me finish this.”
“No.”
I growled.
“Also, you need me,” she said.
I gripped her hand a little harder. “I don’t think you realize how dangerous a man like Silvito Digali is. He will kill you without a second thought and bury your body in an unmarked grave. Or worse.”
She looked away, and I knew she understood what I meant. If I were to be killed, she could become a slave as easily as one of the girls in Iraq.
“That is why I have to do it. I am your only hope,” she said.
“Bullshit,” I said trying to keep my voice down.
She lifted an eyebrow at me. “Oh, really. Did you know that Rafe invited me to Christmas … with his family?”
My jaw dropped. “Motherfuck,” I said.
“Give me a few days and I'll convince him to bring you, too,” she said.
“How?”
“Cara is going through a divorce. All I have to do is remind him of the fling you two had and how it might put her in better spirits to see an old flame,” she replied like the plan was obvious.
“First you date Rafe and now you are pushing me toward another woman.” I shook my head.
“We have to stop him, Jordan. For all those humans out there being bought and sold like chattel,” she insisted as she squeezed my hand.
I looked down on the table where our hands were joined. I let my thumb brush over her skin like I used to, trying to hold onto that feeling. It was useless to fight her anymore. And she was right. This was the first real chance I had of getting close to Digali.
“All right,” I said through gritted teeth.
She smiled. “After this, it will be nothing but babies and barbeques,” she said.
I thought the comment a little strange, but I was too worried about surviving the next few weeks to really analyze it.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Cece
I always thought of wrapping presents as a tedious activity.
Though, I never had very many to wrap at one time. I usually bought Lauren a gift for her birthday and Christmas and occasionally Sonny. But they were always small items, and I didn't always bother with wrapping.
Today I had a bunch of presents to wrap for Christmas with the Digalis.
At first, I was a little intimidated by all the different sizes. I needed a spot where I could spread out. So here I was in the practice ring of the gym. I laid down a clean mat and went to work. After my second one, I found myself smiling at the product, with the perfect folds and spiraled ribbons. YouTube could take some of the credit, but I was proud of myself for creating something beautiful, even if it was meant to be destroyed.
After Jordan's confession, I was feeling the pressure of a novice spy, terrified that I would somehow give away the secret without meaning to. But as I measured, cut, and folded each present’s wrapping, I found myself relaxing a little, like the task gave me a sense of control in this nightmare scenario, making it cathartic.
It was only a couple of days after I met Parker that Rafe asked me to lunch. That was when I told him I would come with him for Christmas. He had been excited and told me all about their home in Lake Tahoe. Then we talked about presents, and I volunteered to do the shopping. When the waiter brought the check, I casually asked Rafe what all the guys were doing for Christmas and mentioned that Jordan would be all alone for the holiday. Then I brought up how his sister might benefit from seeing Jordan. “It would help her confidence after the divorce,” I had said.
At first, Rafe had looked at me strangely, and I was convinced he saw through the manipulation. But then he smiled and said, “That is a great idea. I never would have thought of it.” I shook a little when he had reached for my hand. “You are so thoughtful, trying to bring everyone a little happiness.”
I had waved him off, not wanting the praise for my evil doings.
Whenever the guilt started to seep in I had to remind myself why the deception was necessary. Rafe was going to get hurt, but whatever heartache I cause would be nothing compared to what his father was doing to people every day: selling human beings into slavery to be abused, raped and God knows what else. I knew this mission wouldn't wipe slavery away, but it would help a lot of people. I wanted to rescue them from Digali's clutches. That was the reason I insisted on helping Jordan. I knew I was putting myself and our child in danger, but if it worked we would be making the future just a little bit safer for him or her.
As I began on my fifth present, I thought back to that day I found out I was pregnant. I had taken the test in one of the stalls at work, setting it on the paper roll while I played sudoku on my phone, completely confident that I wasn't pregnant. When I looked up, there were two lines when the time was done. Two lines.
I exited the stall and dove into the trash can, searching for the box I had thrown away, convinced I read the instructions wrong. But I didn't read the instructions wrong. Two lines meant pregnant. I remember all the anger that I managed to set aside came bursting through my chest so that I wanted to scream. Anger at Jordan, anger at myself, anger at the two lines. I was my mother, a stupid slut who let herself get knocked up by a man who didn't want her. I stayed in the stall and cried until Mark called me over the loudspeaker for check-out. I stuffed the test in my pocket and went back to work, in a daze the whole time.
I knew I had options. I didn't have to have the baby. But I couldn't stand the thought of aborting it. Then there was adoption, giving the child to a good family so he or she could have everything I didn't. That was the option to consider. But I had to find Jordan first. After closing I went straight in to Mark's office and set the test right in front of him. The look on his face was almost as shocked as mine. He went to speak, but I held up a hand. “I need to know where Jordan is,” I had said.
He never told me how he found him. He simply handed me the address before I left work the next day.
My decision about the baby had been lingering in my mind the entire time I was in Vegas. I knew adoption was the best thing I could do for the baby. I was only nineteen, and I had no way to support a child properly. I thought about how they have open adoptions now, but somehow, I knew that would be too painful, hearing my child call another woman Mommy.
It wasn't until Jordan made his confession that I finally let myself think about the other alternative, keeping the baby.
If Jordan and I survived the next few weeks and worked out our issues, we could have a chance at doing things right. Giving our child a home and a loving family. It wasn't until now that I realized why I came to Vegas. I told myself it was to find out the truth, but, it was the chance that Jordan would want the baby as much as I did. I looked over to my pile of gifts and was disappointed to find only one left. It was the one I’d bought for Jordan. I wouldn't give it to him at Christmas with the Digalis. This was for after, when we were ready to leave Vegas and go back to Clayton. It is a small box, only the size of a book, and the contents were kind of silly. But I couldn't resist when I saw it.
Jordan and I decided that it was too risky to talk or try to see each other after our night at the bar, so we went back to ignoring each other. But it was so much harder now than it had been before the restaurant. Knowing that he still loved me made it hard not to go to him. Not to mention, the hormones were really starting to wreak havoc on my libido. I had to touch myself every night imagining it was Jordan, remembering his words, his hands, his lips. That was another good reason to keep my distance. If I did allow myself to stand close to him, I’d probably end up humping his leg like a bitch in heat.
Once I was finished with all my presents, I took them to Rafe’s office and set them on the floor in the corner, all except the one for Jordan.
I went back to my room to get ready for the fight tonight, but I ended up j
ust sitting on my bed, staring down at the tiny box.
I thought about how it represented the future, a future where Jordan and I would be together. But I’d been picturing a future without him for so long that I wasn’t sure if I still wanted it. My hatred for him still festered in my chest. Even after he explained why he left, I couldn’t quite forgive him. It was hard for me to trust him, but once I did, I gave him everything. And then he left, without telling me why. I didn’t buy his excuses for one second. Jordan hadn’t been trying to protect me. He simply didn’t trust me. And that hurt most of all. He didn’t think I had what it takes to handle a situation like this.
Looking back, my hatred of the club probably made him believe I wasn’t capable of being like him. It’s true that I thought of them all as liars, criminals, and perverts. I thought I was better than them, like a self-righteous bitch. But I was wrong. They were criminals, but they were also brave and loyal. Two things I wanted in my life, in my friends, in my lover.
I hid the present in my suitcase where it would stay until this whole thing was over. It was just a few days until Christmas.
Jordan and I still had shit to work out, but before that, I was going to prove to him that I could handle his life. Once he could accept that, then we’d see if there was a chance for us to be together, to be a family.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Jordan
I wasn't at all surprised to find the Digali compound built into a mountain, giving it the feel of a fortress. We stopped at a guard’s post that was a mile from the house, where we were made to exit the vehicle, so we could be scanned along with our luggage. You'd think we were about to get on an international flight with such a thorough search. We were also asked to turn over our cell phones with the promise that we would be contacted if anyone called or texted. That had been a sketchy request, but it didn't matter. I’d switched out our cell phones weeks ago for safety’s sake.
The plane ride to Lake Tahoe would have been pleasant if I hadn't been subjected to Rafe flirting with my woman the whole way here. The last month had been a slow torture of maintaining my distance. There were so many times I caught myself outside her door. Each time, I told myself if I could just touch her for a few moments, that would be all I need to go back to sanity. But I knew it wouldn’t end there. If I touched her, I wouldn’t stop until I was inside her, buried deep in that tight pussy until I was completely satisfied.
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