Xavier shook his head. His jaw worked as he tried to discern what to say next.
“He was lying. People don’t fucking change.”
I didn’t have a retort to that. I wasn’t going to convince Xavier of what I believed, and I wasn’t in the mood to even try. I just wanted to get past this conversation.
“Is that everything?”
Just when I thought we were done. That question caused a wave of fear to roll through my stomach. I looked down at the floor. It was at that moment I realized the music still playing, and as if a sign, Beyonce’s Sandcastles played. The part where she mentioned showing your scars and she wouldn’t walk away was my current dilemma. I looked up at Xavier and his eyes, still filled with anger, were also begging me to confide in him. So, I decided, and shared with him a secret I’d never told anyone.
“No, that’s not everything. A couple of weeks after I moved to L.A., I started feeling tired and rundown. I thought it was just the stress of the move, but after getting into a fender bender because I’d become extremely dizzy while driving, I was taken to the hospital and found out I was pregnant.”
I paused when I saw Xavier’s eyes widen, but I needed to say the last part, so I continued.
“I was about eight weeks along. I-I was in no place to have a baby, especially with Ethan, so I had an abortion.” I leaned back against the half-wall that separated the kitchen from the dining area. I hadn’t even told Gabby about the pregnancy. I didn’t want to think about it. Also, I didn’t want her or anyone to try to talk me out of it. I spoke with a doctor on the OB staff at the hospital, and they did an exam and then talked me through the process of a medical abortion along with possible side effects. A few hours later, I’d swallowed a pill and then went home to take the second pill twenty-four hours later.
Thankfully, Gabby was out of town that week. I was still living with her at the time. The following night I experienced a lot of cramping and bleeding as the pills did their job. Two days later I went back to the doctor to make sure the pills worked and everything was fine. I’d stuffed that memory along with everything else associated with my relationship with Ethan down and did my best to forget it all.
“He never knew?”
I shook my head but still didn’t look up. “I never spoke to him again. He called over and over, even reaching out to my father and Jason, looking for me. But at that time, I hadn’t even told them I’d moved to L.A. I just said I was staying with a friend. My father thought I was succumbing to the pressure of finishing law school and studying for the bar. One time when I called home, he told me that’s the reason he didn’t want me to go to law school in the first place. That I couldn’t handle it. He said I owed it to Ethan to go back, but I just made up some excuse and got off the phone.”
It had taken me months to speak to my father after that conversation. By the time I did, I had gotten a job at an L.A. firm, changed my number and email address, and cut all ties with Ethan.
“You went through all that alone?”
I shrugged. “Not all of it. I had Gabby.”
“Who you didn’t tell about the pregnancy.”
“Yeah.” I tilted my head up, looking at him. I placed my hands behind my back on the wall and leaned my weight against them. That was all I had. All my dirty little secrets were exposed. He could take them or leave them, I supposed.
“Was that meeting the last time you talked to him?”
My brows furrowed. “With Ethan?”
“Yes.”
“Uh,” I hesitated. “Not quite. He emailed me after that article came out to apologize again and ask if there was anything he could do.”
“This fucking clown,” he sneered. “Where is he now?”
The thunderous anger in Xavier’s eyes related that he’d surely do more than talking if he knew where Ethan was.
“I don’t know. I don’t!” I insisted when he looked at me dubiously. “I emailed him back and told him thanks, but no thanks, and that was the last I heard from him. I didn’t bother to ask him where he’s living when we met. I only know he’s no longer in D.C.”
“I swear, when I find him—”
“When?” I questioned.
Xavier didn’t respond.
“Xavier, don’t…” I took a step toward him, grabbing his hand, but he cut off my protests.
“Don’t defend him to me. I swear...”
“I’m not defending him. I’m just asking you not to get crazy. It’s over. It’s in the past.”
Again, no words came from him.
I decided to try and lighten the mood. “You know, my therapist would say I’m making pretty good progress. I told you something I’ve never told anyone else.”
That elicited a response. “Therapist?”
I nodded. “Yeah, after everything that happened, I couldn’t sleep. I’d wake up from nightmares about Anne Marie and Noah, or from my past. So, I finally decided to use the card you gave me awhile back. I’ve been seeing her for about three weeks now.”
I sighed a little in relief when his eyes softened. “She’s helping?”
“Mm-hmm.”
“No more nightmares?”
“Not as many.” They’d subsided but still occurred.
I saw the intensity rise in his eyes as he drew closer to me. Standing toe-to-toe, he cupped my face and lowered his forehead to mine. I wrapped my arms around his waist and ran my fingertips up and down his spine. I grinned when I saw his stomach muscles jump at my touch. I loved the physical reaction his body had to mine.
“I’m sorry,” he stated just above a whisper.
“Can you answer my question now? Why did you leave?” I’d opened up to him. I’d done all of the talking. It was his turn.
Chapter Eight
Xavier
I didn’t have an answer to her question. Not one I was ready to share just yet, anyway. I felt too much anger. The hurt and pain, and mostly shame I saw in her eyes when she talked about her ex, was too familiar. It made everything in my body vibrate with anger.
At that moment, I truly understood what the phrase “to make someone’s blood boil” was all about. I could feel my temperature rise as she told me about the first time he’d put his hands on her. When she only nodded after I’d asked her what he’d done after my visit to their apartment, I saw red. And to know he tried to give some whack ass apology? Nah, he wasn’t getting off that damn easy. But she didn’t need to know that, so I kept that information to myself.
“You don’t have to tell me yet.”
I brought my attention back to her face and her eyes that were now filled with sadness. I didn’t want her to feel rejected, but I wasn’t ready to reveal that ugly part of my past. I knew it was hypocritical of me to have gotten on her for lying to me about her ex, and here I was, withholding information about my history. But the words wouldn’t come. Instead, I tilted her head up to mine and pressed my lips to hers.
There was some resistance on her end. She still wanted to talk. I didn’t. Her resistance melted away as she opened up and moaned into my mouth. The sound immediately shot to my dick, causing it to jump in my boxer briefs. I bent at the knees, not breaking contact with her lips, placing my hands behind her knees and standing, wrapping her legs around my waist. Her fingers came up, grabbing at my shoulders and pulling me closer. The tension in my groin grew as I carried her down the hall, and we barely made it halfway up the stairs before I had to lay her down. The heat from her core against my waist had my dick ready for entry. But first, I wanted to taste her.
Breaking free of her lips, I pushed her back against the carpeted steps and eased the oversized T-shirt up over her hips. I used my shoulders to push her legs apart. At that moment, I looked up to see her glazed eyes peering down at me, her lower lip tucked in between her teeth, anticipating my next move. Keeping my eyes on her, I lowered my head and swiped my tongue over her tight button. A loud gasp escaped Chanel’s mouth as her head fell back against the stairs.
I grinned as he
r sweet aroma floated up to my nostrils, and my stomach muscles tightened in anticipation. Pulling her clit in between my lips, I sucked and rolled it between my tongue and roof of my mouth, eliciting another round of moans. I felt Chanel’s hand come up and grip the back of my head, as if to keep me in place. She didn’t have to worry about that. I was even more anxious to feel her legs tremble as she came than she was. I used my tongue and mouth to massage her sex until finally that telltale shaking of her legs commenced and a flush of moisture coated my lips. The tightening of her legs around the sides of my head encouraged me as I continued to lick her through her orgasm.
By the time she came down from her high, my dick was rock hard. I scooped her up and somehow carried her the rest of the way to my bedroom.
“Anxious much?” she questioned saucily when I placed her down on my bed and made quick work of ridding her of the T-shirt.
I didn’t bother answering. The huge bulge in my briefs was response enough. I stared down at her naked body, my mouth watering as I took in the view of her round breasts, topped with areolae the color of cocoa powder and nipples the color of dark chocolate. At that thought, my mouth watered to taste those round mounds. I didn’t even have time to make my move before I felt Chanel’s hand snake its way into my briefs, stroking me.
“See something you like?”
“That feels good, baby girl.”
“I missed you calling me baby girl.”
Our eyes connected after her confession and I swear my dick swelled even more. I’d call her ‘baby girl’ and anything else she wanted to keep this feeling between us. With her hand still on my shaft, I climbed onto the bed over top of her, easing her onto her back and making room for myself between her legs. Reaching over her head to the nightstand, I opened the top drawer and pulled out a condom.
“Push my boxers down,” I instructed, right before dipping my head and sucking on Chanel’s earlobe. She did as requested in the midst of more moans. With my boxers down around past my hips, I pulled back, tearing open the condom wrapper. I briefly noticed Chanel’s eyelids raise when I covered myself, but neither one of us had time to think as I covered her mouth with mine and slid inside her moistness.
We groaned into each other’s mouths as I filled her all the way up to the hilt. Taking both her hands and intertwining her fingers with mine, I raised them over her head against the pillows, using our hands as leverage to lift my upper body up slightly. I needed to look down at her as I plowed in and out of her. Her eyelids were half-closed, mouth agape, forehead wrinkled as she took me deep inside her.
“Look at me.” I pulled almost all of the way out. When she finally looked up, I forcefully pushed all the way back in and swiveled my hips against hers to make contact with her swollen clit.
“This pussy is mine, right?”
“X—ah!”
Any admittance to my question was cut off by another downstroke.
“I can’t hear you. This is mine, right?”
“Ye—” Another plunge of my hips.
“What was that?” I questioned through gritted teeth.
“Dammit, Xavier!” she hissed at me.
I chuckled and raised her arms even farther over her head. I lowered my head, so my lips just brushed over hers.
“Say it.”
“It’s yours.”
“You’re mine.”
“I’m yours.”
A rush of heat shot through my entire body and I bottomed out in her pussy. It didn’t take long for her orgasm to crest, the tightening of her walls gripping my dick and bringing about my orgasm. I lowered my head to the space in between her head and shoulder and grunted. Her arms tightened around my shoulders as her legs tightened around my hips.
When I finally caught my breath and realized I’d been laying my entire body weight on top of her, I adjusted our positions so she was sprawled out on top of me. My body shivered at the light touch of her fingers grazing my chest.
A few minutes later, she sat up, resting her hand on my chest and pressing her chin against it, so she was staring directly at me. Those big eyes of hers held me rapt, saying everything and nothing at the same damn time. She drew her other hand up and began outlining my lower lip with her pointer finger. The quiet of the room was broken by her giggle when I opened my mouth and bit the tip of her finger.
She sighed. “I missed these lips,” she admitted, once again using her finger to outline my mouth.
“Is that all you missed?”
“Not even the half of it.” She ducked and pressed a kiss to the middle of my sweaty chest. It was a small gesture, but one I felt all the way to my toes. “Are you leaving again?”
That question accompanied by her hesitant tone made my entire body stiffen. My lips turned downward, and I used my hand to lift her chin, so her eyes were once again on me.
“What?”
“I mean, is this...you and me? Are we together?”
“You’re mine. Always have been.” The sureness of my answer was revealed in the steadiness of my voice. “Don’t ever forget that.” I reached down and squeezed her ass, causing another giggle. I was thankful she didn’t ask any more questions about why I’d left in the first place. I’d answer those in due time. Right now, I just wanted to spend the day in bed with her. Reveling in what I’d missed for so many weeks. I had to leave again for work in a couple of days, and I planned to spend as much time with her in my bed and me inside her as possible.
“That can be arranged,” she agreed, alerting me to the fact that I’d said that last part aloud. “As long as you don’t mess up my hair anymore,” she added, patting the wild mane around her head.
“I thought you were on your India Arie.”
She frowned at me, confused.
“I am not my hair. Your hair is kinda wild though,” I laughed, tugging on a few of her wild strands.
“Shut up!” She smacked my chest.
“Nah, I like it tousled like this though. Reminds me of how it got that way.” I raised my eyebrows, wiggling them at her. The laugh she was barely holding in burst out and my chest did the same. This feeling right here is what I’d been missing for the last month, and I was determined to ensure it remained between us. I pulled her back down to lie on me.
“I have to leave for Vegas on Monday. So, that only leaves today and tomorrow for us to spend time getting reacquainted.”
“Are you asking me to spend the weekend with you or telling me?”
My smile widened, and my hand paused in her hair. “What do you think?” I wasn’t asking, and she knew it.
She laughed and shook her head. “What am I going to do with you?”
“I can think of a quite a few things,” I growled, biting her ear as I adjusted our bodies, so she was once again underneath me.
****
I stepped off of the private plane and into the stifling Las Vegas heat. Nevertheless, I felt better than I had in a long time. I paused to button the middle button of my gray Hugo Boss suit jacket and made my way down the steps to the tarmac. This trip was for business, but it felt like it might as well be for pleasure as long as I’d been planning this project. The only thing that would’ve made it better would have been to have the woman I’d reluctantly dropped off at her condo this morning by my side instead of back in Houston. But this wasn’t one of my grand openings, not yet anyway. We still had a ways to go until the actual restaurants were up and running, but this trip was making that day one step closer. My hands twitched with anticipation as I reached the waiting Lincoln Town Car. The driver held the door open for me.
“Welcome back, Mr. Grant,” Marshall, my usual driver when I was in Vegas, greeted.
“Marshall, how are the wife and kids?” I inquired.
“Great, sir. The wife’s still begging to leave Vegas though.”
“Still looking for more beach time, huh?”
The older man shook his head and chuckled. “You know it.”
“Can’t blame her.”
“Eh
, who needs the beach when you’ve got the Strip?” He looked genuinely perplexed.
“Can’t argue there,” I agreed as I climbed in the backseat. A few seconds later, Isaac, who’d accompanied me on the trip, got in on the other side. My phone buzzed with an email from my assistant, Bryce.
Your 11:00 appointment is finalized, and the reports are attached.
Today I was meeting with the owners of the two casinos where I was opening my two latest restaurants. It was an ambitious move on my part, opening not one but two spots in Vegas at the same time.
“Anyone else trying this move, I would’ve said they were crazy as hell,” Isaac stated as he sat next to me.
“But you already know I am a little bit crazy.” I didn’t bother to look up from my phone as I typed my response back to Bryce.
“To be this successful you’ve got to be at least a little crazy.”
I chuckled.
“I’ve heard that before. Now, tell me something I haven’t heard. Tell me about Rossi’s employees.” It’d been Isaac’s responsibility to do some maneuvering to make sure Rossi’s employees were ready to jump ship, and I had it planned out that they would swim right over to me, as my employees.
“He’s losing employees faster than the Titanic.”
“And we’re rescuing them, right?”
“Of course.”
“Good.”
We rode in silence most of the way to the hotel where we were staying, which just so happened to be where one of the restaurants was scheduled to open. Within thirty minutes I was entering my hotel suite on the top floor with a spectacular view of the strip below. Despite the magnificence of the room, I wasn’t there to indulge in luxury. I was there to get some shit done. Even before unpacking I pulled out both my laptop and tablet, plugged them up at the desk in my spacious bedroom and began printing out the reports Bryce had emailed me earlier, thanks to the in-room printer I’d requested ahead of time. After that task was completed, I spent another hour or so finalizing some other issues that needed addressing, and confirmed my dinner appointment for that night, not too far from the hotel. As I stood to stretch, there was a knock on my door.
Safe Space II: The Finale Page 9