Love Notes ((Book Two of the Heartbeat Series))

by Renee Lee Fisher

  Thomas turned to look at me. “What was that about Maddy?” Thomas questioned as I didn’t let him get comfortable on my shoulder.

  “Well as I see it, I don’t want you to get any kind of wrong idea with me.” I tried to take a stand with him. I tilted my head toward his, having finished only two summer Sangria specials. “Thomas nothing is going to happen here, not now and not ever.” I think he may have taken that in as he just smiled and I think I noticed him look slightly defeated. I was not going to feel sorry for him or caress is ego. I channeled my thoughts to the man I was thinking about as the bright sun warmed me. Rand, my once captivating heart throb, then my boyfriend, and now my fiancé, and soon my husband, I hoped and believed that our relationship would never become difficult and we could push past most objects thrown in our path.

  Thomas and I had been occupying this table for the entire afternoon and I am certain the restaurant, especially on a beautiful summer day, wanted to turn this table a few times. Our waitress stood several feet from us acting busy but looked eager to clear our table when we finally got up to exit after four hours. I knew she would be smiling though as Thomas left a very large tip. I did hug Thomas lightly, with a slight pat to his back and I thanked him for all his help. He pulled me in tightly and perhaps waited to see if the hold would lead to something further, but I released quickly without any hesitation.

  Time flies. As I sat in my car, I pulled out my phone and texted Rand in case he had a break to say hello, or if not just to let him know he hadn’t left my thoughts today, actually hadn’t any day since we met.

  Love, I had a nice lunch with Thomas, he was able to make it today. I am just heading out of the city now. He couldn’t resist mentioning not seeing a ring on my finger and had to ask if you and I were okay with our relationship. Perhaps we can carve time in our schedules to put one there. See you tonight, oh and I will surely have a kiss and other things waiting for you.

  I heard my phone sound with a text as I was heading back to our house; I looked down when I pulled into our driveway to my phone. I parked my car and still had to pause that I lived here now. I opened up his text message and read it as I looked at the view from my dash board of the barn and his-our home off in the distance. The tall landscaped sea grass was shifting side to side, and the flowers were in full bloom that the landscaping service tended to. It was beautiful and I began to read what was I was certain another beautiful text from Rand.

  Hey, you’ve been on my mind. I’m going to put the biggest diamond on that finger of yours to make certain it is seen a mile away from all men that desire you. I’ll be late tonight because Maxwell has us meeting some biggie music promoter, Stanley Kildare. He is from the Midwest. He also represents a drummer/singer relative named Killjoy, who is quite a rocker. He mentioned to Maxwell that he would like for Killjoy to join us on stage in the Midwest tour schedule for a few featured songs in our concerts. Stanley is dropping by later to hear us and then we are going to catch some beers. If I get home and you’re sleeping, I’ll climb in next to you in our bed and you will not be dreaming it’s me, it will be me. Madison you warm my heart, I love you.

  I learned not to take anything in life for granted. I thought long ago that my father would have been with me for so many years to come. When my father passed away Rand stepped in to take care of me. I am so thankful that I have Rand in my life, and just the way he sends me a simple message brings me to my knees and I clutch my heart and take a breath. He is that powerful of a feeling to my very soul. I think I am so much stronger as a person since he and I have become a couple. I know what lies ahead will be distance when he travels but I hope to handle it well with each new instance.

  I sent him back what only few words I could type before the tears filled my eyes and blurred my vision.

  Babe, I couldn’t love you anymore or I would explode!

  Walking in to the house which is ours together now I look about in the rooms that I pass through and see the little added touches and changes that I have made, bringing in a bit of myself to the décor, but never wanting to change what Rand has made here. I kicked off my shoes and headed toward our master bedroom, I fall back onto our bed and a sweet smile comes to my lips. My phone sounded, I hit the speaker and the voice echoing in the room is yet another smile to my heart.

  “Hey you! I miss you my sister friend but first, what gives? Word travels fast and someone told me you were cozy with Thomas today, what was that about? So when are we getting together? Please let’s get out soon, even Cecile is up my butt to get you to come out and play with us a bit.” Jillian continued talking like a gun firing bullets, and I hadn’t even opened my mouth to respond yet.

  “Well hello to you too and yes we’ll catch up. In fact, our men will be traveling soon so we will be doing a lot of girl bonding. Thomas was nothing, just helped me with my father’s estate stuff. Those days for us are so over. Hey, are you up for walking the park tomorrow? Since Cecile is bugging you I’ll let you invite her along,” I replied. It was then that I rolled over in the bed and my eyes looked out across the yard. I saw some cars over at the barn, probably for rehearsal or to prepare for the meeting with the big producer. I tried to stay out of their rehearsals and that way perhaps Rand would miss me just that little bit more.

  “Hey, Maddy are you still with me?” Jillian asked.

  “Yep, I’m here, I just was really chilling out and taking in the view outside. You know sometimes I cannot believe how happy I am.”

  “Madison you deserve to be, and I hope I get there too. I need to catch you up with what’s been happening with me and Raeford, some good and some bad.” I told her we would talk lots and I would see her tomorrow and gave her a phone kiss.

  There are those few friends in life that you really keep close to your heart. Jillian was mine. I had her so close to me, whether I doubted myself in life, she built me up. When I was so drawn to Rand and thought it was impossible for a man like him to like me and then truly couldn’t believe he fell in love with me. She never doubted. I often felt insecure in my looks and body because hers was perfection, but she built up my confidence and allowed me to see a positive perspective of my body, and well, Rand seemed to love what he had seen and he had seen it all. I think if I need a transplant she would be first in line and do that for me as well.

  Over the years I have become close to her and her brother Jason, although since he remained in Georgia after taking on an employment transfer, we got even closer because she missed him and had more of a void in her life. Back when Thomas had left me and Jason had relocated, she and I were left to get up and face each day. So many days, I did not want to get up and she made me try. She pushed me; she made me stronger as the months passed.

  I must have slept through into the dark morning hours. I rolled over still in my afternoon clothes to see a shadow in the room and what a fine shadow it was. I could make out the outline of the shoulders that were built strong and toned. The well-built arms that had artwork on them, and then as the shadow turned I could see from the hall light a halo effect on dark hair that hung into his face, but I saw as the shadow moved toward me the brightness of that white smile that overcame his face. In the silent morning hours, in the darkness illuminated by the moonlight that filtered into our bedroom, I felt his touch. All it took was his hand as it quietly stroked my cheek. I quivered as his simple stroke on my skin rushed a tingling sensation through my entire body. I sat up slowly being captivated and pulled into this glorious shadow of my man. I only remained seated a few seconds before being taken and laid down again into the softness and comfort of our bed to know Rand was here and I found him irresistible and he was going to make good on his earlier promise of warming my heart. But I was already on fire.

  When the morning came, I was no longer feeling the warmth; I was chilled as Rand had woken up and gotten into the shower early leaving me in the bed alone. He was heading out to work on some more new pieces of music. He told me as he was finishing dressing that the he and the band
would be playing for most of the day. I closed my eyes and enveloped myself into the comforter and closed my eyes for a bit more sleep as he had me up most of the night. I am not complaining but I wanted a little more rest. Rand leaned in and kissed my nose and then bent forward and lowered his clean mint scented mouth to mine and kissed me, not goodbye, but kissed me with a see you later. What seemed like only a few minutes had passed was a few more hours and my ring tone sounded on my phone, Jillian was up and ready. I lengthened myself on the sheets and rose for the new day.

  Valley Forge National Park is lovely, and to live so close to it, I suppose I take it for granted. So many tourists and visitors come here daily, but I just ride by most days not taking it in. Recently, when we could squeeze in the time Jillian and I, and some days Cecile, would meet to walk. Mostly we would stop and take a photo for a sightseer enjoying the outdoors, and would take in an occasional view of deer during the day. This morning was great to be outside, it wasn’t too hot yet and there was a gentle wind. Cecile had met up with us just as we got started on the walking path. She apologized saying it was all Kent’s fault.

  I said to her, “I guess you had some great sex last night too.”

  She smiled and said to me, “It’s not what you think, Kent and I like each other but we actually haven’t had sex.”

  My mouth dropped and I think Jillian was just as shocked she couldn’t ask the question that was on both of our minds. I had to, “Cecile, you’re funny, kidding right?

  “Madison, I’m a virgin. Kent is very understanding, he seems like a wild boar but he has really been patient and respects me. We are taking things very slow.”

  Somehow I never knew that Kent could be sensitive with anyone or continue with a hot looking girl like Cecile with the lack of sex. I thought he was a very nice guy but more a thrust and pound type of guy and would not wait in the bedroom. I was glad they were seeing one another, but I wondered why Cecile was holding onto her virginity for such a long time. Jillian said nothing, just still looked stunned. It was nice to walk and talk with each other, but I had a feeling that Jillian was hoping Cecile didn’t make it. I know Jillian well enough to get the vibe that something was on her mind. I figured our next walk I would make with just her and me and perhaps she would spill what it was.

  Jillian said she and Raeford were together but she wasn’t sure about the days ahead. Lately, he was more quiet than usual and seemed to be uncertain about his career. This surely put that indecision in her voice as she spoke. Raeford had shared with her that he was none too happy with this Stanley Kildare person, because another featured drummer/singer was coming on the stage with them and that took away from his playing time and his performance. Even though it was only for a few shows, I think Jillian wanted to feel me out to see if Rand had spoken to me about the band’s business. Rand usually kept me out of the details only played some new compositions that he was writing to get my reaction. Most all the music he shared I loved so my responses were always favorable. Most times after he played a song we would wind up in each other’s arms and spin around with a sense of wonder, creating the rest of the music silently in our own rhythm. I can still reach in my head and hear some of the music he has shared with me and in those unspoken times between us, we totally get one another. I was deep in thought thinking that this band business would pass soon after Killjoy’s few appearances and then things would resume to normal and Raeford would be tight with the band once more.

  As we came on the last stretch of the park, we commented that it was nice to get together. It was moments like this that you found out information on each other and today it was that Cecile was a “virgin”. I would have never guessed that. Before we all left in our own vehicles, Cecile reached over to me and hugged me but then asked if I was going to be okay with Rand heading to the Midwest for the next two months. I hadn’t even thought of it until this moment she put the seed into my thoughts. I shuttered in her hold. Two months. I didn’t know how I was going be. Logically, it’s only sixty days, only eight weeks, but I felt like someone punched my stomach. I was uneasy over the upcoming trip and it hadn’t even begun. You never know what will happen when the boys hit the road. Last year traveling with them and seeing the girls that threw themselves at the band, I remember their faces all too vividly. What am I thinking? I am engaged to Rand. We have a bond, a tattoo proposal in ink.

  Chapter Three – Betting Man

  Sharing in the moments of my mother and uncle’s honeymoon, only made Rand and I begin to stir and want that soon for ourselves.

  “Our honeymoon was so perfect,” my mother began to elaborate. “We stayed on one of the many beaches in St. Martin, there are so many beautiful ones that each day we drove around the island to view another.”

  My Uncle Jake joined in, “The island food is really good. There are a lot of French restaurants but also there are Lolo’s which are open air barbeque areas along the beaches where the women cook all the food,” he licked his lips smiling as he was still remembering how good it tasted.

  “Everyone we met along the way was so friendly. I enjoyed a ferry ride we took across the bluest waters to Anguilla. There we walked on the white powder sand that was the softest I ever felt between my toes.” My mother said this last part while wiggling her toes in her sandals with a huge smile. I could see her enthusiasm bursting out of her both for being so in love and talking about it openly and to me, her daughter, now in her life. Second, her happiness was obvious at the fact that after so many years she was able to go on her honeymoon with her husband.

  “It sounds lovely and quite relaxing. I hope when Rand is done with some of his shows and traveling that we can one day take a getaway to a private beach,” I said as I winked at Rand.

  “Madison, you know I will take you to the moon and back,” and he puckered his lips at me.

  What a wonderful meal we all shared. My mother was inspired by all the French bakeries on the island that she tried to recreate some desserts from pictures she took while there. They also brought back infused rum from the island where they stopped into a place called Ma Dou Dou. Here they hand paint the island bottles. We had banana vanilla rum and the bottle displayed a beautiful painted purple hibiscus flower that jumped from the bottle like a three dimensional picture. It looked so real. I traced my fingers along the petals and down the stem. I can’t even remember what Thomas and I did for our honeymoon. I think I blocked that memory. I know that if Rand and I have our honeymoon that it will be a memory I revisit in my head every single day.

  “You’re lost in thought Love, can you hear me?” Rand tapped my leg lightly.

  “Oh, sorry, I was just thinking, dreaming here for a moment,” I wrapped my hand lightly over his.

  Having joined them for dinner at my old townhouse was fun. They have definitely made it their own while living here by changing most of the room’s artwork and colors. My mother did keep my writing room just as it was the day I moved to Rand’s. She kept it like that just as a mother would keep her little girl’s room in tact after she went onto college. I think my mother was just trying to keep a piece of me there with her forever now, not wanting to lose us again. We shared a wonderful meal and evening with them. I had a smile across my face as Rand and I walked silently hand in hand to Rand’s Hummer.

  Once seated inside and belted in, Rand leaned into me, “They’re really happy, I want that for us.” I smiled and kissed him delicately, then turning into fervently as he opened his mouth to mine. He broke away from my lips first, but quickly said, “Put your head back and listen. I have just come up with a few new lyrics and I want to sing them out to you on the drive home.” It was nice to hear him say we were driving home, and I set my head back and closed my eyes and heard his singing words drift through me.

  When we arrived back to our home, we were already very comfortable as a couple. Climbing into bed he took out his music to work on and looked so handsome in his reading glasses low on his nose. Those beautiful blue eyes with dark swept lashes
glanced at me often. I pulled out my writing as I was working on something new.

  “Babe, what are you so busy writing there?” Rand lifted his eyes to mine.

  “Well I’ve decided to step out of my comfort zone and try to write a different genre since I am so in love and inspired now. I am writing a contemporary romance that I have titled Mask of Rade.” I told him as I cleared my throat. His genuine interest in my work caused a slight lump to form in my throat. “And what are you busy creating this evening?” I questioned.

  “Well, leaving your mother’s tonight made me think about a few new lyrics, the ones I was practicing on you in the car. I just wanted them on paper so I won’t forget them, although anything I write about you, I could never forget.” He smiled so contentedly at me. It was moments like this that we were just in sync with one another both through our artistic personalities and being in each other’s presence. I spent the rest of the evening after putting down my writing, tracing my fingertip delicately over each of his many tattoos. I studied each curve with my fingertip. I did this often as I would etch them into my mind and look for those vivid colors to brighten my days while he traveled.

  Saying goodbye to him the very next day as he left the airport terminal to walk toward security and his gate seemed surreal. I wanted to still be sleeping and having him hold me. But the next hold I felt was the kindness in Maxwell’s embrace and his whispering into my ear that he would bring Rand back to me in one whole piece, untouched by the youthful ravishing girls that swarmed them at the concerts. I let out a relieved laugh, but held in a sigh for the unknown. I patted Maxwell on his back and told him what a great man he was and to take care of all the band boys. I pulled back in time to see the back view of Rand. I began to walk away with a few tears building up in my eyes and I reached into my jeans to grab my sunglasses and get them fixed in place before the waterworks came.