Reviving Kendall

by Brandy Slaven

  He doesn’t even flinch at the plural use of the word, “They were the guys in that old Camaro?” I nod, and he says, “Yeah, I remember when that happened.”

  Tears roll down my cheek and there’s no stopping them now, “They were my best friends and it’ll be exactly two years ago next week. That’s where I was today when you called for me. Wishing for the millionth time that I had been in that car with them.”

  He chews his bottom lip and I close my eyes not wanting to see any kind of pity or whatever on his face. I hear him shift in the booth and the next thing I know, he is pushing into my side to get me to scoot over. When I oblige him, he sits and takes my hand in his, “Do you think that’s what they would’ve wanted?”

  I shake my head and let out a small laugh, “No, if they were here they’d either be pissed or laughing at me right now.”

  With him sitting this close, when his voice goes quiet, it turns into this smoky sound that sends shivers down my spine, “Kendall, this is probably one of the hardest things that you will ever have to go through, but it will make you a better person for it. You just have to live. If for no other reason than for them. Live life to the fullest, just like you know that they would want you to.”

  His words make sense and he’s right. I don’t know why it takes him saying it for it to click in my head, but I do want to live for them. I want to start right now. With Lucas sitting so close, it’s nothing to tilt my head up and give him the ok look to kiss me. His eyes flick down to my lips and I close my eyes as I feel his breath on my face. That’s the moment his phone decides to go off in his pocket. It’s playing the song from Top Gun and I can already guess who it is calling.

  Lucas sighs and presses his forehead against mine, “I’m sorry.”

  He pulls away and answers the phone as I’m left wondering what he’s apologizing for, sympathy for my story or the almost kiss.

  “Yeah, hang on just a sec,” he says to one of the guys on the line. Turning to me he says, “They got out early and want me to meet them here for food. If you don’t want to see them then now’s our chance to run. We’ve got about a five-minute window.”

  If I’m going to try my hand at this new me, I’ve got to keep it rolling or I might wimp out and decide it’s not worth it after all, “It’s ok. We can wait for them.”

  One side of his mouth pulls up and he puts the phone back to his face, “Already here waiting on you dude. Yeah, I didn’t know you were getting out early and I was fucking starved. Whatever asshole, see you in a few.”

  “Let me guess,” I say, “Maverick?”

  He laughs, “I would say how’d you guess, but it’s not even worth the breath it takes.”

  For the first time in a very long time, I feel a small weight lift from my heart as I laugh with him.

  It isn’t even the full five minutes later when Teagan, followed by Goose and Maverick, come strolling in through the door.

  Teagan throws Lucas a shit eating grin right before he catches sight of me sitting next to him. He halts so fast in his tracks that Goose slams into his back and it knocks his phone to the floor.

  “What the fuck, T?” he all but yells as he bends to pick up his phone. “You better hope you didn’t crack the screen mother fu--” Teagan elbows him in the stomach before he can finish. He follows his line of vision and smiles at me. I could be wrong, but I think Maverick was the first one to see me. I feel his gaze like sunburn after sitting on the beach all day.

  Goose walks around Teagan and slides into the booth opposite us, “You didn’t say that you were on a date.”

  “It’s not a date,” I say quickly jumping in to defend Lucas and possibly even my own pride. I don’t want to hear Lucas say it. He cuts his eyes over to me in question, but smiles as if he already knows my reasoning. Maverick slides in after Goose and leaves Teagan to grab a random chair to sit at the end of the table.

  There’s an awkward silence for a few seconds before Lucas breaks it, “You guys get out for good behavior or something?”

  The three of them smile, but it’s Teagan that answers in that smug tone of his, “It was Ms. K dude. Just told her we were hungry and growing boys and we needed food.”

  Wow. These guys really are used to getting their way, “What were you in detention for anyways?”

  “The usual,” Maverick says then pointing at Goose and Teagan, “These two were horsing around and talking shit.”

  “And you just got caught in the middle?” I ask.

  He nods, “As always. The staff just assumes now that we’re all in on it, even if we’re not even close to each other. The only reason Lucas lucked out is because he doesn’t have that class with us.”

  “Yeah dude,” Teagan says offended, “What the fuck? Why didn’t you do something to get locked up with us?”

  Lucas laughs, “You’re kidding right? I’d say that I spent my time much better than that today.”

  Maverick’s eyes narrow on me and I have to look away as he says, “Yes, I would say that you did.”

  I could kiss Judy as she chooses this moment to bring out three plates that look exactly like ours did. They dig in just as quickly as Lucas had earlier. It’s surprising to watch teenage boys eat hamburger and fries with such refined table manners.

  “What?” Goose asks as he catches me watching him. I just shake my head. I’d rather not insult them by saying they’re supposed to be acting like complete slobs.

  Teagan is the first to finish, “So, what are we doing this weekend?”

  “Well,” Lucas starts, “I think we’ll be going to Kelly’s lake house for the party after the game.”

  Maverick looks up from under is glasses with a confused look on his face and Teagan laughs, “And why the fuck would we be doing something stupid like that?”

  Lucas smiles over at me, “Because Kendall told Eddie that we would.”

  I cringe down in my seat a little, “I was only trying to be nice and I didn’t say that you guys would go. I just told him I would.”

  Maverick’s eyebrows are high on his forehead and he smiles for the first real time since I met them. Goose shakes head and looks at Lucas, “You must not have explained it to her.”

  Now it’s my turn to be confused, “Explain what?”

  Teagan smiles at me, “We don’t go to anything like that alone. Always as a group.”

  “It saves us from doing stupid shit,” Maverick adds.

  I shake my head, “I’m not in your group though. Besides, I probably won’t even go, so it’s no big deal.”

  They all look at each other before Lucas says, “Let’s just say you’ve got a temporary pass and we’re going to the party Friday night.”

  Teagan just about jumps out of his seat, “Does that mean you’re coming to the game too?”

  I shrug, “It’s been awhile since I’ve been to one. I always work on Fridays plus our team sucks.”

  The guys laugh like Lucas had earlier and Teagan says, “Yes they do. So that means you need to come watch how the game is really played.” He jumps up from his seat and strolls over to the table in the corner where Eddie and his friends are. My eyes travel across his body and I can’t help but admire the swag that he puts into his step. It makes his jeans hug in all the right places.

  When I tear my gaze away, I catch Maverick staring at me. I feel my face heat up in embarrassment. Goose in my peripheral is watching the two of us and smiling like a lunatic.

  “Ok,” Teagan says walking back to the table with the small blonde under his arm, “Kendall meet Ryleigh, my baby sister. Ryleigh, Kendall.”

  She holds out her hand across the table, “Nice to meet you.”

  “Back at you,” I respond as I shake her hand.

  Teagan throws his arm back around Ryleigh as he talks to her, “Kendall is coming to the game and Kelly’s party Friday. She doesn’t know anybody from our school. You’ll help her out and let her sit with you at the game and stuff, right?”

  Her eyes light up like she’s happy
to do anything and everything he asks, “Yeah, of course.” She turns to me, “I can come get you right after school since you get out a little later than we do. We can hang out at our house until the game starts.”

  I see Lucas stiffen in the seat beside me and even as I answer her, he still doesn’t relax. “Sure. Sounds fun,” I say.

  “Hey Ryleigh, we’re heading out,” Eddie says from the door.

  She throws up her hand at me, “See you Friday.”

  I nod at her and Lucas pounces as soon as she’s out of earshot, “Are you going to be ok riding with her?” His words are quiet, but the guys still catch it.

  “Why would she not be ok?” Maverick asks in that serious tone of his.

  Lucas looks to me in question and I shake my head. “No reason man,” he answers Maverick. Then to me he asks, “You ready to go?”

  I nod and dig my wallet out of my side pocket of my shirt. Lucas puts his hand on top of mine stopping me. The other three watch the exchange with expressions ranging from curiosity, hurt and anger. The last coming from Maverick of course.

  Lucas whips out a twenty and tosses it on the table, “I’m going to run Kendall home real quick. Meet you guys at the house in a little while.”

  They all give me polite goodbyes, but if looks could kill, Lucas would be a dead man. I return Judy’s wave on the way out the door. Lucas opens his door for me and once I’m inside and buckled in, I take a tension relieving breath. It’s intense being around the four of them together like that, especially being attracted to all of them. Not to mention the seriousness of the conversation and the almost kiss earlier.

  Lucas lets me get lost in my head the entire way back to Sleepy Pines. He goes to pull in and I stop him, “Right here is ok.”

  He shakes his head, “I thought we were past this. Which one?”

  Shame burns hot spots on my cheeks, but it’s not really for our place. It’s for all of the others around us. They’re all in bad shape and no one bothers to keep their tiny spaces clean like Gramps and me. I point to it on the end, “That’s me.”

  He pulls up behind the Malibu and I grab his hand as he goes to throw the truck in park, “Thank you for everything today. I didn’t realize how much it would help to talk to someone about all of it. It’s not the same when you pay someone to listen. You’re much better than my therapist any day of the week.”

  I feel stupid for saying so much, but he just smiles, “Anytime Kendall. Truly. If you ever need anything, just call me.” He reaches in the glovebox and pulls out a pen and napkin. After he writes down his number, he hands it to me, “Use it if you need to. Or even if you just want to.”

  I nod and hop down. He shuts off the truck and comes around the side, “Can we go inside real quick? I almost forgot that I owe you something.”

  My thoughts are jumbled in confusion caught somewhere between what he’s talking about and the thought of him coming inside.

  His fingers move to the buttons on the front of his shirt, “Or I can just strip down out here.”

  Then it clicks. His tattoos. “Oh my god, Lucas!” I freak out, “You can’t take your clothes off out here.”

  He undoes the top button and his hands move to the bottom of the vest thing that he’s wearing like he’s getting ready to pull it over his head. My hands close around his, “Please stop. Save it for another day.”

  His eyes narrow teasing me, “Are you sure?”

  I nod, “I won’t let you forget.”

  He smiles and leans down to press a kiss against the corner of my mouth. It sends tingles all the way to my toes. I watch as he gets back in the truck and winks at me before pulling out of the little driveway. Watching until he’s all the way back on the road, I don’t go inside until I can’t see his lights anymore.

  S’mores

  On my way out the door the next morning, I take a hard look at the keys on the hook. After I got home last night, I did a quick run through on all of our bills coming due for the month and was surprised to find that Gramps already paid the electricity bill. When I asked him about it, the only answer I got was ‘it’s covered until at least December’. I pressed him for more details, but it was like pulling teeth, so I gave up. That means that I’ve got an extra one fifty in the bank. Teagan’s words got me to thinking and why shouldn’t I get a cell phone? There are those prepaid things and if I don’t have the money that month then I just won’t keep service on it. I was so excited last night that I almost went right then to get one, but common sense won me over. It’s always best to sleep on big decisions.

  I’m pretty sold on it this morning and since I have to work later, it would make more sense to drive. I’ll never make it over to the store and in to work on time if I’m walking. Snatching the keys down, I walk toward Gramps’ door. I knock softly, but there’s no answer. I hate to wake him up, but I need to make sure that he isn’t going to need them today. It’s not like he can drive, but sometimes the neighbors come over and borrow the car to run errands for him or take him to the doctor when I can’t.

  “Gramps?” I call out softly, knocking again. I get no answer. One of my biggest fears is that I’m going to come knocking one day and the no answer will mean the worst. I know it’s inevitable. We all die at some point. I just don’t want it to be right now. There’s rustling on the other side of the door and I let out a relieved breath.

  I hear him cough before saying, “Kendall? Everything ok?”

  Cracking the door, I give him a few seconds warning and then peek my head around the corner, “I was going to take the car today. Would that be ok?”

  He tries to hide his shock, “That’s perfectly fine. Robert did everything I needed him to do yesterday. Just drive careful please.”

  “I will, Gramps, promise. I won’t be back after school. I’m going to run to the store before work. Want anything?” I ask.

  He shakes his head then stops, “You know, I saw a commercial the other day for some of those white fudge covered Oreos. Your Nana would have loved those. Could you pick some up for us?”

  I smile, “Of course. How are you feeling?”

  “Better than I have all week,” he says smiling.

  “Good,” I tell him, “I’ll be back later tonight. Call me at the school if you need anything or need me to bring the car back.”

  He nods as he slowly lays back down, “I will, Pea. Drive safe.”

  His words choke me up and I have to shut the door before I start crying. Gramps and I have never really said that we love each other, but his use of the nickname Pea reminds me that we don’t have to. It’s enough just to know that he cares, because we both already know. My heart takes a deep stab wound as I think about losing him. Not today Kendall. Keep your shit together.

  I manage to make it all the way through school without running into any trouble, other than Mr. Parker telling me that if I’m going to start driving to school that I’ll need a parking pass. I spend my lunch break in the office filling out paperwork and waiting on the secretary to get her ducks in a row, but it pays off. Waiting until last bell, I rush out to put the sticky thing on my window, so I can hurry to the store.

  “Goddamn it,” I say getting frustrated. The thing is monstrously huge and super sticky and for some reason keeps trying to crinkle on the window. I’m about ready to give up when a male hand reaches around and takes the sticker from me.

  “Here let me help,” a voice says. I look up to see Billy Terth, the school’s quarterback, smiling back at me. Embarrassingly enough, he flattens the sticker in less than five seconds.

  I want to thank him for his help, but my mouth is glued shut. His dirty blonde hair shines in the sun and with his hazel eyes plus a bright white smile, there’s no doubt that he’s a looker. He doesn’t run in Derrik’s circle, but that doesn’t mean that I trust him. Call me a stereotype if you want, but I don’t put anything past that asshole.

  “Thanks,” I say finally.

  He smiles wider, “You’re more than welcome. Those things can
be kind of tricky at times.”

  If I was feeling anything towards him, his next words would have crushed them, “I haven’t seen you around before. Are you new here?”

  “You’re kidding right?” I say not able to stop myself.

  He looks taken aback, “What?”

  “Dude, we’ve been going to school together since the fourth grade,” I say backing up to open my door. “And what’s even worse is the fact that we have three classes together right now.”

  His eyebrows draw down on his face as it scrunches in confusion. When I start the car, he backs away throwing me a smile and a wave. It’s actually a fucking creepy smile. His look is how a runner looks at the finish line. It makes me miss Lucas and the other guys. They may be arrogant prep boys, but at least they are genuine and don’t give me the willy nilly’s.

  I try to shake it off as I go into the store. Conscious of my time frame, I know I don’t have a lot to spend picking anything out. Doing the next best thing, I get someone to help point me in the right direction. I manage to make it out of the store with a working smart phone, whatever the fuck that is, and a month’s worth of service for less than ninety bucks.

  The first thing I do when I get to the car is save Lucas and Teagan’s number in the contacts the way that the guy showed me in the store. It takes me about five minutes, but I also figure out how to send them both a text message letting them know that I finally got a phone and giving them my number.

  “Shit,” I say glancing at the time. “Shit, shit, shit.” I’m going to be late for the first time ever. I’ve got five minutes to make the fifteen minute drive to the restaurant. After Charles’ words the other night, I don’t think he’ll fire me over it, but it’s more than that. Nana and Gramps raised me with a work ethic of knowing better. Early bird gets the worm and all that hoopla.

  Unfortunately, it looks like I won’t be getting that metaphorical worm today. I’m ten minutes late and have to rush through throwing my uniform on in the bathroom. Trying to make up for being so late, I work my ass off into the night. We are busier than normal and since I’m trying extra hard, tips roll in.