“Avoiding you?” He couldn’t be faking that level of astonishment. “Why would I do that?”
“Because of what you thought happened last time I watched your son.” There. Best to have that finally out in the open. There was nothing she disliked more than playing games. Especially after living with the master game player, Shawn.
“Oh.” Eric went quiet for a moment, as if considering her question. When he turned to fully face her, the serious expression he wore had her stomach tying up in a quick knot. “I panicked, JJ. Garth is everything to me. I wasn’t blaming you or accusing you of doing anything.”
“I didn’t notice his lack of breathing,” she stated. “If he really had stopped and I didn’t see that, how could you not blame me?”
He frowned. “JJ, I’m not sure I would have noticed. Heck, I don’t even know if he really stopped breathing or if it was just my overactive imagination kicking in. It’s not like I expected you to do nothing but sit and stare at him.”
She had to smile at that.
“Like right now,” he continued. Gesturing toward his still-sleeping infant, he shook his head. “I’m here with him and you. I have no way to know if he is breathing unless I stick my finger under his nose, which would probably wake him up.”
The humor in his tone coaxed a chuckle from her.
“Truce?” he asked, raising his beer can toward her wineglass.
“Okay.” The clink of the glass and the metal made her smile again. “Are you ready to watch the movie?”
When he nodded, she hit the pause button again to unfreeze the DVD.
Überconscious of him next to her, she drank her wine faster than she usually did. When her glass was empty, she glanced sideways at him. He seemed to be totally engrossed in the film, one she’d watched a bazillion times. She could even recite the lines.
Getting up, she poured herself a second glass of wine and returned to the couch. He didn’t even look away from the TV.
Reaching for popcorn at the exact same moment he did, JJ felt their fingers brush. She froze, resisting the urge to yank her hand away. What she really wanted to do was to hand-feed him, one kernel at a time.
Blinking, she looked down and took a deep breath. Where had that come from? She needed to get control of her crazy libido. Sleeping with her tenant would not be the smartest business move.
But oh, it would be fun. Possibly amazing, even. But a complication she definitely did not need.
As a distraction, she took another deep sip of wine.
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice a sensual rumble.
Forcing herself to look at him, she tilted her head. “For what?”
“Hogging the popcorn. Here.” He pushed the bowl toward her. “There’s still plenty left.”
Eyes wide, she stared at him, unable to move. And then, just when she thought she’d be okay, she leaned in to get the popcorn and somehow winded up with her mouth pressed against his. Who moved first—did he kiss her or she him? Dizzy, she wondered if it even mattered.
She tasted the salty butter of the popcorn on his lips and then, when their tongues met, the yeasty flavor of his beer.
Kissing him was everything she’d ever imagined. And she had thought about it plenty.
When he deepened the kiss, she opened her mouth in welcome.
And then he broke away, pushing himself up off the sofa. “I’m so sorry,” he muttered, dragging his hand through his unruly mane of hair. He wouldn’t meet her gaze. She tried to speak and failed.
“That should never have happened,” he said. “I can promise you, it won’t happen again.”
Chapter 9
Though JJ nodded in agreement, disappointment flooded her. She hadn’t kissed anyone except Shawn in over three years. According to Shawn, no other man would ever find her desirable or want her, besides him. While she knew this was one of the numerous mental games he played on her, years of constant reaffirmation had made her wonder if it was the truth.
Which was no doubt why she took Eric’s rejection way harder than she should. “It’s okay,” she managed to reply, her throat tight. He still kept his gaze averted, which hurt.
Pushing herself up, she walked to her kitchen and refilled her wineglass. Then, staring at the half-empty bottle, she tried like hell not to cry.
“JJ.” He’d followed her.
Fiercely wiping at her stinging eyes, she took a swig of her drink before turning to face him.
“Are you all right?” Gaze gentle, he crossed the space between them and cupped her chin with his big hand. She suppressed a shiver at his touch.
“I’m fine.” Lifting her chin, she tried for carefree, but ended up only sounding sad. Aware she had to come up with something to say that would fix that, she took a deep breath. “We need to stay friends, okay? Nothing more. No more kissing.”
Surprise flashed across his handsome face. “I agree. I went through a horrible divorce.”
“And I an awful breakup.” Crud. She hadn’t meant to reveal so much.
“You did?” He met her gaze, his own warm. “So that was the emotional ‘stuff’ you had to get away from. At least, I assume he wasn’t here, in Forestwood?”
“No.” She felt like she shouldn’t talk about it, as if by doing so she could somehow draw the darkness of Shawn’s energy into her home, her safe haven.
When she didn’t elaborate, Eric sighed. “Friends, okay? I’m sorry for what happened. I like you and I really don’t want to lose your friendship.”
“Same here,” she told him, telling herself that she spoke the truth. If some small part of her wanted more, then she’d have to deal with that, until it went away for good. And she had no doubt it would. Right now, she was bruised and wounded.
They watched the rest of the movie in a silence she hoped was companionable—at least to him—but as far as she was concerned felt really awkward. She’d get over this. She had to. Because Eric had made an excellent point. She liked him and wanted to be his friend. That, in her humble opinion, was much more rare and valuable than a fleeting romance.
After the movie finished, he stood and stretched. Though she tried, she couldn’t manage to keep her gaze on his face. Instead, she watched him with a kind of mindless hunger. The kind that made her feel hot and bothered and completely out of sorts. She served him a big bowl of stew—enough for two meals—and broke off some French bread for him to enjoy with it.
Juggling everything, he carried the food downstairs and then came back for Garth. They said their good-nights and he picked up his still-slumbering infant and left.
After he’d gone, she caught herself staring at the door, imagining him going downstairs and enjoying the meal she’d prepared. She felt an instant of regret, wishing she’d invited him to eat with her, but knew she’d probably done the right thing. Especially since she couldn’t help but imagine him later, climbing between the sheets of her aunt’s antique queen-size bed, probably naked. Her blood heated at the thought.
More foolish daydreaming. She figured this was her way of trying to distract herself from worrying that her ex would somehow find her and cause trouble. Shaking her head at herself, she rinsed the empty popcorn bowl, turned out the lights and went to bed. Hopefully, the plows would come through early so Eric wouldn’t feel trapped in his home.
The strident sound of her fire alarm jolted her out of a sound sleep and extremely pleasurable dream. Sitting up, she breathed in, immediately swallowing a lungful of smoke.
Not. A. Malfunction. Coughing, heart pounding, she picked up her phone and dialed 911, even as she moved toward the doorway. She wondered if they’d even be able to get to her house with all the snow. On the way out, she snagged her parka off the coatrack near the door.
Clattering down the stairs, she pounded on Eric’s doorway. “Fire,” she yelled
, and pounded again.
He yanked the door open, clearly half-asleep. “What’s going on?”
“Fire. Grab the baby and come on. There’s a fire in my unit. We’ve got to get out.”
He didn’t waste time questioning her. Turning, he ran for his son. She stepped inside, found the baby’s coat, as well as Eric’s. When he reappeared, holding his sound-asleep infant, she urged him outside.
Eric saw her eyeing his son. “This kid can sleep through anything,” he said wryly.
Once they were outside, she could see flames shooting from her upstairs windows. The sight chilled her even more than the brisk wind, making her want to weep.
They struggled to move through the deep snow, trying to get some distance from the house. On the front lawn, she helped Eric make sure Garth’s coat was zipped and they put a knit cap on his little head before pulling up the hood and turning him to keep his face out of the wind. This startled him awake. Of course, he immediately wanted his bottle, which Eric didn’t have, though he’d had the foresight to grab a pacifier, which seemed to satisfy him.
“This is awful,” she said. “I called 911 but I don’t know if they’ll be able to make it, since the road isn’t plowed.” Amazing how things could change in the matter of a few hours. Before she’d gone to sleep, she’d wondered if she’d feel shy around Eric after the hot kisses they’d shared, but this crisis shoved all that out the window. Talk about perspective.
He eyed her and then squinted out toward the street. “It looks like the plow might have come through earlier. Maybe when we were watching the movie. There are really high snowdrifts on the other side.”
Trying to hide her agitation, she tromped through the snow to see. “Thank goodness,” she told him when she returned. “I hope they hurry.” She pointed to the flames. “It appears to be getting more intense. I don’t want the entire house to burn down.”
As she finished speaking, she heard the sirens. “I hope they can put the fire out in time.” She felt like chewing her nails, a habit she’d cured herself of shortly after moving here. Her thick gloves helped with that, too.
“They will. It’ll be fine. Let’s move a little farther away, just to be safe. Even though the fire is upstairs, you never know if it’ll burn through the floor or something. Let’s go. Just to be safe,” he repeated.
He had a point. Huddled together, they all moved closer to Rhonda’s house, hoping the structure would provide some shelter from the bitterly cold wind. From there, JJ could see flames were now shooting from the attic area above her unit. It looked like her entire floor and above might be a total loss.
The fire engine pulled up, lights flashing. The siren gave one final whoop before the driver cut it off. A police car came around the corner, fishtailing as it took the slippery turn too fast. The officer at the wheel parked right behind the fire truck.
“I’m surprised they didn’t send an ambulance,” Eric remarked. “At home when the fire department comes, they always send a paramedic, too.”
“We only have one,” JJ told him. “They aren’t going to tie it up unless they know for sure it’s needed.” Though she stood perfectly still, her insides jumped and jangled. How could this have happened, just when she’d begun to feel settled and happy? “They have to put this fire out,” she whispered. “I can’t lose my home.”
Instead of answering, Eric squeezed her shoulder.
Over the next hour, everything seemed to happen in slow motion, while she watched as if from a distance. It felt like someone else’s nightmare. Using a huge hose, they doused her pretty little house with water, firemen in yellow suits heading inside. She winced when she heard the sound of an ax hitting wood. And she prayed silently, head bowed, as hard as she’d prayed the last time Shawn had come home drunk and mean. There had been no divine interference then and she didn’t really expect it now.
As she swayed from exhaustion, barely containing her panic, Eric put his arm around her. He’d shifted little Garth to against his chest and under his coat. “It’s all going to be all right,” he said. “I promise.”
“Is it?” Turning on him, unable to control her shivering, which wasn’t from the cold, she gave in and let herself collapse against his strong chest right next to his son.
“I’m wondering if you should wake Rhonda,” he said. “Get inside and warm up.”
She started to shake her head, but he continued. “I’ll go with you. I’m worried about little Garth. Even though he’s bundled up, he’s shivering.”
Stunned, JJ raised her head to check on the baby. Wide-awake, he watched her from Eric’s chest. His bright blue eyes, so similar to Eric’s, were wide-open. He should have been snug as a bug in his little hooded parka, but his cheeks were rosy from the cold.
Instantly contrite, she nodded. “Oh, my gosh. I’m so sorry, I didn’t even think. You and Garth need to go inside. I can’t. I’ve got to see what happens with my house. I’ll go with you and then come back. Follow me.”
The sidewalks weren’t shoveled, either. Crossing the remaining distance between her house and Rhonda’s was slow going and surprisingly treacherous. Several times she paused, looking back over her shoulder to make sure Eric and Garth were behind her. She was glad he allowed her to go first, though normally he would have been the one to forge the path, since he was taller and larger. But she figured he was glad to use this to distract her. As if anything could. Once she’d delivered him to Rhonda, she planned to go right back to her own house.
Finally, they reached the wooden steps leading up to Rhonda’s porch. The house remained silent and dark. It seemed really odd that Rhonda hadn’t come outside to check out the commotion.
JJ climbed onto the first step and nearly wiped out. Only a quick grab for the railing kept her from landing on her behind. “Careful,” she told Eric. “It’s black ice.”
When they all were finally up on the porch, JJ pressed Rhonda’s doorbell and waited. She heard the chimes echo inside. Nothing. After a few seconds, she rang it again. Still nothing.
“This isn’t like her,” she told Eric. “It’s weird.”
“Try knocking.”
So she knocked, though with gloves on the sound was muted. Again, no response.
“Maybe she’s not home,” Eric said, hunched against the cold.
“Maybe not. I thought it was strange when she didn’t come out once the fire truck got here.” But JJ still couldn’t shake a nagging worry. “I’m going to call her just to make sure.”
“It’s two o’clock in the morning,” Eric reminded her. “If she’s out of town, you’ll wake her and probably scare the hell out of her.”
He was right. She nodded, sliding her phone back into her rear pocket. She’d have to wait until a decent hour to check on her friend. Even though she knew if Rhonda had been planning to go out of town, she would have asked JJ to keep an eye on her place.
Meanwhile, the water spray the firefighters had sent had frozen, making huge rivers of ice on the side of her house. As far as she could tell, the fire appeared to be out. A heavy lump of worry settled in her stomach.
Again moving together, they trudged back through the snow.
“I’m worried about the baby,” she said. “I’m going to ask one of the firemen if you and Garth can sit in the cab of their truck. It’s bound to be warmer.”
“Wait.” He grabbed her arm as she turned to go do exactly that. “What about you? You must be cold, too.”
“I’ll be fine,” she said, gently pulling herself free. The dull chill that had settled in her bones had little to do with the temperature. “Until they tell me the fire is completely out, I’m not letting my house out of my sight. This is all I have in the world, my safe haven. I can’t lose it. I simply can’t.”
* * *
Eric felt strange taking refuge in the warmth of the fire engine c
ab while JJ braved it out in the cold. He supposed he could go get his SUV and start that, but he really didn’t want to leave the scene just yet. Plus he had his son to think of, and even though leaving a woman alone outside might not be gentlemanly or chivalrous, he was doing what was best for his baby.
Or so he repeatedly told himself, while he fidgeted inside the warm truck.
Finally, he couldn’t take it any longer. Garth had fallen asleep, so Eric left him there, going to stand outside where he could see everything, but close to the door just in case.
JJ caught sight of him and hurried over.
“What’s the word?” he asked.
“They don’t think there was any structural damage.” JJ sounded both relieved and anxious. “Lots of smoke and water damage, though.” Her voice wavered and she looked down.
He realized she was fighting to keep from crying. Balling up his hands into fists to keep from touching her, he nodded. “What about the downstairs unit? My place.”
The dullness in her gaze as she looked at him told him she was operating on the last reserve of her waning strength. “I didn’t think to ask,” she finally admitted. “Since the fire didn’t spread beyond the second floor...” Heaving a sigh, she blinked. “Let me go back and find the guy who said he was in charge.” She hurried off.
When she returned a few minutes later, he saw the answer in her eyes. “Looks like we’re both going to have to find a new place to stay for a little while.” Panic flashed across her expression before she covered her face with her gloved hands. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’m so sorry. I know you didn’t plan on this.”
“None of us did.” Acting instinctively, he reached for her and pulled her close in a hug. “I’m sure Rhonda will let you stay with her,” he said, hoping to reassure her. She smelled like smoke and water, completely different from her usual lavender scent.
“Maybe. I don’t actually know her all that well.” JJ looked up at him, frowning. “I wonder if she’d consider allowing you and Garth there, too. Even though she doesn’t like babies, this is kind of an emergency.”
Her Guardian Shifter Page 9