…Wait. I’m getting off-track again. Why did this man suggest giving chocolate as a birthday present? There’s a mystery here—I can smell it. Damn it. If Charlotte were here, she’d deduce her way through this case with ease.
But she said she likes me. If I ask her for help, she might get the wrong idea. …And I might end up falling for her, too. I can’t do that. I am devoted to Miss Nazuna. Even if she’s not completely sure about me.
I’m getting off-track again.
Um… Where was I… Right! Valentine’s Day.
Valentine’s Day. Let’s try to remember the meaning of the holiday.
I know it’s the day that someone called Saint Valentine died. Saint Valentine ignored the king’s orders and blessed marriages, and was executed as a result. …What an awful king. Killing someone for blessing a marriage? Maybe this king was more of a killer than I am. Now, what else about Saint Valentine? …Wait. I get the feeling that Valentine was actually executed for doing miracles in prison or something. Healing someone’s eyes… So doing miracles gets you executed too? That’s not just awful, it’s terrifying. So is this what a witch hunt is? In other words, the king treated Saint Valentine like a witch? But Valentine was a saint. Who does the king think he is, calling a saint a witch? …Right. A king. But wait. Was Valentine a man or a woman? I remember they sent a letter to the last person whose eyes they healed… Why is it that I can remember trivial episodes like this and not the saint’s gender? I wonder if Saint Valentine would forgive me.
Whoops. Another tangent.
So…right. A letter.
Saint Valentine sent a letter.
A love letter.
Of course. A love letter is the first gift. The beginning of a romantic relationship.
I thank the man and let him go.
What does he want with Lilei, anyway? He said something about a long-lost sister. I wonder if he was telling the truth.
Oh well. Lilei can take care of a man like that easily.
Now…I should think about what kind of a love letter would make Miss Nazuna happiest.
And what should I attach as a present? …This is going to be a challenge.
The Case of Jun Sahara - 2
The theme park office in the Eastern District.
“What?”
Jun gaped, stunned and confused.
The Guard Team members who understood what the boss had said held their breaths, a variety of expressions on their faces.
Every member of the Guard Team knew that Jun admired Hayato Inui.
But everyone knew not to mention him in front of their timid captain. Not only that, there was no personal connection between Jun and Inui.
In other words, Jun came to admire Inui after seeing him from afar or while listening to the island’s radio broadcasts. At least, that was what the Guard Team believed.
“…Huh? Wh-what? Pardon?” As the understanding dawned, Jun managed to somehow blush and pale at the same time. “Y-you mean Mr. Inui is coming here? A-and I’m supposed to confess?! Whaaaaaat? I-I don’t understand, boss! What do you mean by that?”
“I’ve been waiting for those words! ‘Rabbits die of loneliness. Men die without love. These facts cannot be scientifically proven, but can be artistically represented,’ quoth Saint Jororogis III. That is what I mean.”
“What? …Umm…” Jun contemplated for a moment. Then— “I…I don’t understand, boss.”
Carlos chimed in with a grin.
“So who the hell is Saint Jororogis III?”
“You mean to say you don’t know?! My god! And you call yourself a member of my Guard Team!” Gitarin sighed dramatically, his head in his hands. Carlos didn’t even blink.
“Hey, anybody got an answer for me?”
Noting that nearly everyone in the room was shaking their head, Carlos turned to his boss with a look of mock-anguish.
“Sorry boss, it looks like none of us qualify to be part of the Guard Team. We’ll just be heading out now.”
“Oh. Sorry. I’m sorry. I lied. I told a teeny tiny lie. Sorry. ‘Saint Jororogis III’ is a nickname of mine.”
“You added a ‘Saint’ to your own nickname?”
“Wait, that’s what bothers you?! Anyway, forgive me. I’m sorry.” The boss groveled. Jun raised her voice.
“A-anyway! Why is Mr. Inui coming?”
“Because I called him over.”
“Why?!” Jun demanded, just about ready to cry. Gitarin turned his gaze to the air and lowered his voice.
“Because I want to see you overcome your fluster as you quietly confess to Inui…or is that not a good enough answer?”
“It’s not just ‘not good enough’! It’s completely unconvincing, boss!” Jun raised her voice in a rare show of anger.
The other Guard Team members began whispering to one another, seeing the signs of entertainment about to begin.
“Oh, so Jun really is besotted with Inui?”
“Which century did you get that word from?”
“I guess I understand. I mean, she even has a Western District wanted poster of him posted on her wall.”
“Oh, the one the boss doodled on?”
“But Jun and that rainbow-haired freak?”
“Ahahahahaha! This is hilarious!”
“Don’t be stupid, Mii. It’s not nice to make fun of people in love.”
“But you know, Jun had a lot of chances to meet him. Why didn’t she confess earlier?”
“I-if that was physically possible for Jun, she wouldn’t be agonizing in front of us now.”
“Then again, Carlos goes around picking up girls in Spanish cause it sounds all exotic.”
“I could switch to Japanese if you’d like.”
“Hey. Forget this womanizer.”
As the members chattered on and on, Jun was struck by a dizzy spell. She staggered out of the office.
“Where’re you going, Jun?”
“I-I need to wash my face…”
Pale, Jun headed for the bathroom at the end of the hall. Perhaps she was too confused to even get angry.
Washing her face with cold water at the sink, Jun decided that she should cool down and get a hold of herself.
She stared at her reflection as she thought of how the conversation had gotten to that point.
“Let’s see…”
First, she had to get her own feelings in order.
How did she feel about Hayato Inui?
They first met several years ago.
Back then, the island still had Northern and Southern Districts, and Jun was not yet captain of the Guard Team. It was sometime then that Gitarin warned the team to be wary of a certain individual.
“He’s just a business contact. But to be honest with you, he’s a bit of a loose cannon. Watch yourselves around him.”
With that, he showed them a photograph of a certain young man, taken from a great distance.
Though his features were unclear, his rainbow-colored hair was easy to identify.
“You’re doing business with someone that dangerous, boss?” The man who had been the Guard Team captain at the time asked.
In response, Gitarin gave them a wry grin.
“We’re just exchanging information. This man essentially unified all of the Pits under his command. And after talking with him, I got a bit of a read on him. He’s the same kind of guy as Mr. Gen.”
“Did you call?” A middle-aged man in sunglasses responded from a corner of the room.
The man was toying with a grenade in his right hand and held a bottle in his left.
“…Right.”
Listening to the exchange, Jun surmised that this Inui must be a terrifying individual.
Jun appreciated Gen as a member of the Guard Team, but she was well aware that he was impossible to control.
Supposedly it had only taken Inui a few years to bring the outlaws of the Pits under his control.
He mu
st be someone terrifying, she thought.
And if he was as uncontrollable as Gen, it was only natural that the Guard Team be wary of him.
Jun put down the name ‘Inui’ and his seven-colored hair on her mental ‘to-avoid list’. She decided to keep an eye out for him, with the determination that she would destroy him should he choose to act against the Eastern District or the island.
That night, with that determination fresh in her mind, she went out to sate her hunger.
She stepped into the ramen shop under her apartment and was slurping down her order of Etsusa Naval Warfare ramen—the most expensive item on the menu—when a certain encounter took place.
It was a sudden, unexpected meeting—and an absurdly improbable one, to boot.
“Hey Mr. Take.”
Jun was the sole patron in the shop with only two seats.
That was when a second customer showed up and took the other seat, cheerfully greeting the owner.
Jun had just been bringing noodles to her mouth. She hunched forward slightly so as to not bother the other patron, not looking in his direction.
But never could she have expected Mr. Take’s response to the new customer.
“Get out.”
“?!”
“You’re gonna make the lady’s ramen taste stale. Go wait outside until she’s done.”
“Whoa! That’s cruel, Mr. Take!” The man sighed, smacking his forehead.
Jun looked up at Mr. Take in confusion, but she could not read his stoic expression.
That was when the other customer spoke.
“C’mon, babe. Back me up here. Your ramen’s gonna taste just fine even if I’m around, right?”
“Oh, yes! I don’t mind at—”
Jun looked back reflexively as she responded—
“AAAAAHHH!”
—She burst out screaming, leaned back, and ended up falling out of her chair.
It was only natural—after all, she had just come face-to-face—almost literally—with the man from the photograph in all his rainbow-haired glory.
“Pah! What’d I tell ya? You scared her!”
“Uh, wait! Shit! No way! I…umm…sorry, did I scare you? Funny…I thought the rainbow would be a hit with the girls…makes me look like a fairy or something.”
“You want to be popular with girls who fawn over rainbow-haired fairies?” Mr. Take growled. The rainbow-haired man raised his head proudly.
“Sure, why not? Life’s long enough for all kinds of fun experiences!”
“The way you behave, I’d say you’re liable to get a one-way ticket to death before the day is over.”
“Well you know what? Two hours is more than enough for one movie. Long as it’s dense enough, you could call it a long time,” the man said with a childlike grin, then held out a hand to Jun.
“You all right, babe? Sorry for scaring you. While you’re forgiving me, why don’tcha become the heroine in the movie of my life? Lulz.”
“Ah—”
Jun took his hand and began to respond—
“Enough of your jokes—get outta here before the lady runs off crying!”
“Tch. Fine. I’ll come back before closing time.”
Before Jun could say a word, the man was gone.
Without an inkling of how much he knew about her position, Jun’s first meeting with Hayato Inui ended in the span of a minute.
Time had passed since then. Now they were fully aware of each other’s positions, but they had never had a chance for a proper chat. Part of that was due to Inui’s year-long absence from the island.
Even now, Jun did not have her feelings completely in order.
‘I admire Mr. Inui. Yeah. That much…I know.’
During a certain incident on the island, Inui had been framed and had become a wanted man across the districts.
But when Jun heard the truth about the incident from Gitarin—how Inui had not only accepted the blame but also had the audacity to use it to his advantage—she was moved. That boldness was something she lacked.
But admiration was not necessarily love.
When she consulted her friend Misaki, who worked at the casino, Misaki had replied,
“No! He’s just asking for trouble, Jun! You’re in enough danger as it is!”
Carlos, who happened to be there, had chuckled, “Whoa, looks like someone’s seeing green.”
“N-no! I’m not jealous! Mr. Carlos, you idio- …Ah! EEEEEK! I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry! I lied! You’re not an idiot, Mr. Carlos! I’m the idiot!”
The conversation had ended there with Misaki’s panicked apologies, and Jun never got her answer.
But everyone on the Guard Team—with the obvious inclusion of Gitarin—seemed to recognize that there was an ambiguous issue between Jun and Inui that needed addressing.
‘Right. I have to set things straight.
‘I’m going to meet Mr. Inui…and figure out properly if I do like him or not.
‘Confessing might be a bit much. But…I have to move forward…’
Being such a good-natured person, Jun decided to treat the opportunity as a gift from Gitarin.
She wondered for a moment if she should let herself move to the roar of her chainsaws, but she decided against it; it would be more meaningful to confess while in full control of her faculties.
Wiping her face with a handkerchief, Jun steeled herself and anxiously returned to the office where the others waited—with a grateful heart, just like the gentle person she was.
‘Thank you, boss. Thank you for giving me a chance to finally be honest with—’
“One, two!”
“Lalalalala—lala—lalalalala—lala—”
“Bam-ba-bam—ba-bam—”
“Dadadadadatsktsksii—tsktsksii—”
“Nananananana—nananananananana—nana—nana—nanana—”
A bizarre chorus of voices greeted her when she returned to the office.
Gitarin was flourishing a conductor’s baton, and the Guard Team was singing sounds in rhythm like a group of human instruments.
It was an eerie sight.
What dazed her even more was the fact that the noise almost sounded like a coherent piece of music.
“Umm…what are you doing, boss?”
“Ah, you’re back.”
Gitarin lowered his hands, and the Guard Team went silent in unison.
As Jun watched nervously, Gitarin held his head high.
“What else? Prepping the BGM.”
“What?”
“You won’t get much of an atmosphere without any music. Sorry to pop this on you so suddenly, but we need you to accept the team’s collective love power and become a great skier ranking at about 700 million on the superhuman scale.”
“S-superhuman scale? A skier?! I…umm…wasn’t I supposed to…uh…meet Mr. Inui alone?” Jun asked, managing to form a question in the midst of her confusion.
“WHAT?!”
Gitarin was utterly baffled.
Jun nervously looked around. The Guard Team members exchanged glances.
Then they beamed and gave her a thumbs-up in unison.
“I don’t understand! A-and where’s Mr. Zhang?”
Zhang was usually the one to put a stop to zany schemes like this, but when Jun realized he was nowhere to be found, she became even more afraid.
“He said he was done with this and went off to eat.”
“N-no way! …Huh?”
At that point, Jun noticed the pink booklets the other Guard Team members were holding.
“…What’re those?”
“Primers. The boss just handed them out.”
“Primers for what?” Jun wondered, borrowing a copy from a nearby member and skimming the title.
She fell to her knees.
‘The Lovey-Dovey Jun Sahara Operation! ~The roar of the engines echo through the hot spring steam. The scent of death on the Love-L
ove Chainsaw~’
As she dropped the booklet, Jun landed on the ground and screamed—out loud and internally.
She gaped at Gitarin, but he was already holding up a video camera and humming.
“Hm-hmhmhmhm~ Lights, camera, action?”
“What?”
Held in his hand was a camcorder from the mainland. It was the latest model on the market.
“Wait! Don’t shoot! Wh-why do you have a video camera running, boss?!” Jun complained, almost in tears. Gitarin flashed a confident grin.
“Hah hah hah! You’re forcing my hand, Jun. Check the back of the booklet.”
“The back?”
Jun scrambled to pick up the fallen booklet and scanned the back cover.
‘Sponsored by Buruburu Airwaves’
“…Um…what is going on here?”
“You know, Jun. The Western District’s population’s surged recently thanks to the volunteer police and Kuzuhara, and because Yili is playing nice. They still charge protection fees, but it’s not even the Western District’s main source of income so it shouldn’t be a problem in the first place.”
“…Right.”
“But the thing is, if we invite rich people from the mainland to our casino, all they’ll see over eastside is a deserted district. And on top of that, we’ve got a load of dirty and not-so-dirty skeletons in our closet.”
It was unusual for Gitarin to be so earnest about his position as a boss. Jun was confused, but she continued to listen.
“And so, I had an idea! What is it that the Eastern District lacks? Love!”
The Guard Team members stared at Gitarin, who had just now been discussing heavy organization politics. Jun, overwhelmed by his energy, whispered “Love…” under her breath.
“Which is why I want to announce to the island via the radio and the new communal TV at the fountain…that the Eastern District is home to an innocent and adorable girl like you, and your love!”
“B-but boss! I’m not adorable! And I’m not—”
“The Eastern District=Love! I’m going to need you to become the island’s idol and draw every eye in the city!” Gitarin raved, without even waiting for Jun to retort. “According to my schedule, three minutes after your confession, you and Inui will kiss.”
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