When she licks my nose and face, making slurping sounds of incredible happiness, I give in and let my frustration pour out.
I kiss Annie’s head softly, tickling her belly. “You miss him, too, don’t you?” I say, finally releasing the collection of bottled up tears.
I cry against Annie’s soft, warm fur feeling her heart beat fast in her chest – that heart that almost gave up a few months ago. It took all that Nate and I had to bring her back to health.
She doesn’t know what’s going on when my tears dampen her fur but she tries to lick away my despair anyway. Those beautiful brown eyes that have known pain and desolation themselves do their best to chase away the sadness that’s overtaking my soul.
“If only I could have your sense of faith and hope,” I whisper.
I give her some milk before I kiss her goodnight. I walk over to Denise to let her know I want to fill out the necessary paperwork to take Annie home with me as soon as possible.
*
The moment I get in the car the rain starts to fall, fitfully fighting against an angry wind. I drive home slowly, trying to see through double curtains of the downpour – my tears and the furious raindrops.
I have no choice but to run when I park and get out of the car. My light, cotton hoodie being my only shield against the night elements. I’m drenched almost immediately and I shiver as I run through the pounding rain.
For reasons I could never explain in any cohesive manner, I stop a few steps away from my door, breathing in the smells of the sudden waterfall and panting heavily. It was raining like that the first night he came to me asking for my help. I let him in and I will never be free again.
The rain beats down on my face. I stick out my tongue to taste it. The truth of how dreadfully alone I am spills into my heart drenching every dream I dared to let be reborn with his kisses.
Everything I have lost tugs at me with boney fingers. I close my eyes to the sweet delusion of a time when everything loved and lost again will return to me. The rain will stop then and spotted butterflies will swim in the sunshine surrounding all those who have disappeared.
I’m startled to the point of panic when I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn around ready to fight off the intruder but even through the splashing, cold rain I recognize Jack’s familiar face.
“What are you doing out here?” he says with his hair sticking to his forehead, his face beaten down by the heavy water.
“I was about to go in,” I say.
“No, you weren’t,” he says, taking off his leather jacket and putting it around my shoulders.
“Now we’ll both be wet to the bone,” I say.
“I’ll survive,” he says. “We both will.”
I wish it were true. Something inside me breaks. I move closer and bury my face against his chest. I don’t care how he just happened to be around or what he wants. He’s familiar territory and he’s seen me at my worst before.
“Grace, we need to get out of the storm,” he says, placing a hand on top of my head to protect me from the rain.
“Just hold me, Jack,” I say, hiding my tears. “Then you’ll have to go.”
He stays with me until I have the strength to gather up the fractured pieces of me and get inside my dark apartment and out of the cold.
Chapter 23
The night is sweet and calm after last night’s downpour. Taylor has asked Ashley and me to help her finish decorating for Christmas and I accepted even if I feel so devastated that I hate the idea of the upcoming holidays.
The door to the shop opens without the usual jingling bell sounds when I push it. I find Ashley sitting on the floor with her back against the counter and a terrified look on her face.
I follow Ashley’s gaze until I spot Taylor standing with a big, balding guy next to her. There’s something going on that’s not good. Suddenly I’m grabbed by my shoulder and a hand presses hard against my mouth.
“Is that the last one?” the balding guy asks Taylor.
She looks at him defiantly, refusing to answer. The guy puts a hand in his pocket to take out a knife. I have no idea what distinguishes one knife from another but this is definitely no kitchen knife.
The only reason I’m not panicking is because I take a moment to consider if this could be a dream. I’ve been up for two straight nights, unable to fall asleep with a racing mind and a racing heart. I trust none of my senses.
The knife gets close to Taylor’s throat but her lips remain pursed. “Yes,” I cry out, through the hand on my mouth, when I realize this is ugly reality.
My squealing gets the balding guy’s attention. He turns to me motioning to the hand to free my mouth.
“What did you say?” Baldy asks me with a stone cold face.
“I’m the last one,” I say, feeling less and less certain that’s the response he was expecting.
“Is that so?”
I nod. “There are only three of us working here, I swear.”
“All right,” he says. “Lock the door, G.”
G. shoves me down to the floor next to Ashley, taking my purse from me forcefully, before he locks the door and draws down the blinds on all windows. He’s younger than the balding guy but equally scary. They’re both dressed in black pants and jackets and they are big. I mean, really big, like ex wrestlers or something.
My mind’s on hyper-drive, unable to grasp the meaning of any of this. Are they here to rob us? We don’t exactly keep a lot of cash around nor are our products all that valuable or resalable.
The two of them take Taylor by each arm and sit her down on a chair. Ashley’s panting heavily next to me.
“Did they hurt you?” I whisper to her.
She shakes her head, remaining silent.
“Did they say what they want?”
Another shake of the head. Whatever this is, it’s not good. A sudden thought enters my head that they might be after Nathan. According to Nora, he’s been involved in shady business before. Maybe it’s the reason he’s running away.
My eyes blink fast several times when the younger guy slaps Taylor’s cheek so that her head twists to the side.
Ashley screams, unable to control her fear. Her body is shaking violently and I’m worried she’s going to get into a full-on panic attack.
I reach for my mother’s ring on my finger by instinct, but can’t find it. I haven’t seen it in days and get mad at myself for not looking harder.
Baldy comes to us with too long strides. He grabs a satin scarf from a display stand and lowers himself in front of Ashley.
“You’re scaring her,” I say.
He smiles widely, revealing his teeth. One of his upper canine teeth is missing making his smile crooked and goddamn awful. “You should all be scared,” he says, grabbing Ashley by the hair and forcing the scarf between her teeth, tying it in the back of her head.
“That should keep your mouth shut,” he says, taking one more scarf to tie Ashley’s hands behind her back.
He turns to me. “Try to help her and you’ll be next.”
Ashley’s body is shivering and her teeth are chattering over the satin scarf in her mouth. “It will be okay,” I whisper, trying to make my voice as steady as humanly possible under the circumstances.
“What do you want from us?” Taylor says getting Baldy to turn his attention to her again.
“I’ll tell you what we want, sexy lady,” he says and my blood goes cold. “We’re going to keep you hostages as long as it takes for that deadbeat father of yours to pay off his debt.”
Of course. Mister Donahue. It’s not Nate they’re after. I quietly catalogue this first piece of evidence in my head.
Taylor goes pale. “My father owes you money?”
“We have a winner,” the younger guy says with a stupid grin on his face.
“He doesn’t owe us money,” the balding guy says. “He owes our boss money. Shitloads of money.”
Taylor shakes her head. “My father’s not gambling anymore. I saw him last m
onth. He’s doing better.”
Baldy cackles hysterically. “He’s not gambling anymore? Your pap? Shit, he’s up to his eyeballs in it, little girl. In fact, he told us all about your shop and said we should see you about settling that debt. ”
“Of course, there’s interest to deal with and you got a lot to offer,” G. adds, putting a hand on Taylor’s thigh.
Taylor loses it. “Get off, motherfucker,” she mumbles a curse under her teeth and kicks G. in the balls. He bends over, his face paper-white, with both hands over his injured crotch for protection even though it’s too late for that.
Baldy slaps Taylor hard across the face and then grabs her by her long, beautiful hair that is now stained with a spattering of her own blood.
Ashley is hyperventilating next to me, finally going into panic mode.
Baldy puts his blade on Taylor’s throat.
“Me killing you,” he growls, “that won’t slow down this psycho from having a go with you. Your best chance to avoid that evil is to do what I say and stay alive. Pull anything else like that and I’ll drop you in a dumpster and go back for your old man. Understand?”
Taylor looks at psycho G. and then back at Baldy. She nods and the bald man immediately lets go of her hair. G. punches her in the stomach. She cries out and falls to her knees having lost all ability to fight back.
My mind numbs. My entire body wants to spring up and run to her aid, only I don’t know how to do that without making things worse for us.
Baldy pulls G. back before he can abuse Taylor any further.
When I hear my friend whimpering, everything goes black. I tighten my fists to get the blood flowing. Whatever happens to me now will be painful or even fatal as I imagine I’m not as valuable to them as Taylor. But I can’t sit back and watch them beat her down inch by inch.
I have a darkness in me like anyone else. I concentrate trying to access that vicious part I’ve kept locked away all my life. I turn to Ashley and pull the gag out of her mouth. “It’s okay,” I tell her as I undo the scarf around her wrists. “Look at me. It’ll all be okay, Ash. We have to be strong for Taylor. These men will be leaving soon and we’ll have to take care of her, okay?”
She nods, uncertain. Her eyes don’t seem to be able to focus. I can’t count on Ashley for help. It’s all on me. All I need is to get closer to the shop window where I left one of the shop’s phones yesterday while I was arranging the new window display. If you’re the only one in the shop you have to keep a store phone on you at all times.
In theory, all I have to do is find a way to dial 911 without being noticed and then scream for help. I begin to put in order the things I should scream out first and I decide the very first thing should be the address followed by a terrified help when G., the younger thug, turns his attention on me.
“Hey, look,” he says. “One bitch untied the other bitch.”
“She was going to throw up,” I say, slowly lifting myself off the ground.
“Sit down,” Baldy says urgently.
“I was trying to help,” I say, standing up. My heart beats so loud, I think they might hear it as it leaps out of my chest.
“Sit back down!” G. yells, grabbing my hair and dragging me to him. “You need a proper lesson,” he says, rubbing my hip with his hand.
At least, their attention is off Taylor for now.
His hand moves to my butt, squeezing each cheek, checking them out for firmness. “Not too bad,” he says.
Baldy laughs.
I hear Taylor’s distant voice, “Leave her alone,” as G.’s hand moves upward to my chest. I close my eyes as he gropes my body, trying to find a peaceful place in my mind that will prevent me from freaking out and losing any chance at salvation.
My chest feels tight and sweat covers my brows and upper lip. I’m frozen with fear, scared of reliving past nightmares.
“You got big tits for a small girl,” I hear G. saying and all of a sudden adrenaline kicks in. I jump up and away from his prying hands feeling pure fire going through my veins. With two steps, I’m next to the window, diving between the shelves and looking for the lost phone.
Taylor yanks at G.’s hair from behind to keep him from coming for me but he’s way too strong for her to stand a chance. He knocks her down with the back of his hand while I look frantically for the phone unable to locate it.
Baldy has been watching with an amused grin on his face the whole time, doing nothing to intervene. “Is this what you’re looking for?” he says finally, raising a hand with the phone in it.
After a short hesitation, I throw myself against the blinds banging once and then twice against the glass even though I know how unlikely it is that anyone would be walking by the shop this late at night.
“Please, somebody,” I scream with tears in my eyes as G. grabs my ankle, pulls me off my feet and then drags me away from the window.
“All this for a little money,” I say when Baldy comes for me. “How can you live with yourselves? Don’t you have mothers, sisters, daughters?”
“I wish I could say it was the money,” Baldy says, sarcastically, “but I got some issues. I actually enjoy my job. I get my kicks from it.”
“Tell us what you want and we’ll do it,” Taylor says.
“Really? Do you have a hundred and sixty thousand dollars? That’s the way out, honeybee.”
“He can’t have lost that much money,” Taylor says weakly.
“No, but that’s how much he owes.”
“You can’t possibly think I have that kind of money,” Taylor tries to plead with him.
“One way or other, that debt has to be settled. In cash or in flesh.”
“Let my friends go,” Taylor says. “They have nothing to do with this.”
“And they’d run straight to the police, wouldn’t they?”
A splitting headache hits me out of the blue making my vision blurry. I’m sliding into panic. I can’t let that happen. I can’t afford to fall apart. No matter what happens now, I have to stay sharp.
“All right, enough babbling,” G. says pulling a gun out of his jacket. “All three of you, sit down over there,” he says, pointing to where Ashley is sitting.
Taylor and I sit down on either side of Ashley, taking her hands. Only now do I get a chance to truly evaluate Taylor’s condition. She’s badly hurt, her nose is bleeding, her eyes are both swollen, she’s got a split lip and there are cuts and red welts forming on her arms and upper chest.
“This was just a warning,” Baldy says, reading my thoughts. “Next time we’ll scar her for life.”
Taylor leans in. “Nate was here earlier,” she whispers. “He made me promise not to tell you but since we’re screwed, I don’t give a fuck about promises. He asked a lot of questions about Jack.”
He’s still in town. Still curious about me. It should make me hopeful but I can’t really feel much right now.
“Let’s concentrate on getting out of here alive,” I say.
“That’s not up to us,” she says defeated.
“Keep sharp,” I say. “We’ll make it.”
A phone rings and G. answers it. “Yeah, okay,” he says. “Got it. Huh? Resistance?” He laughs. “None whatsoever.” G. turns and stares at us as he listens to his boss, presumably. “You sure about that?” He rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “Yeah, I hear you. We’re on it.”
He hangs up and whispers something to Baldy. They both look at us as if we’re prey about to be hunted to death.
“We’re going and you’re going with,” Baldy says, carefully tucking his knife away in his pocket.
Ashley lets out a scared cry.
“That one’s a mess,” G. says. “She’d be best silenced.”
Ashley’s wailing attacks the nerves in my ears like a pulsing wave of squealing hyenas. The two thugs nod to each other and try to drag Ashley away. Both Taylor and I attack them with teeth and claws. I’m slapped back hard, once, twice, until the ringing in my ears is louder than anything.
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I don’t think there could be a louder sound in the world when suddenly there’s an explosion of shattering glass and brick at the front of the store.
Confusion reigns as debris scatters and brick dust hangs in the air like a morning mist. The whole shop window implodes and the thugs scurry about on the ground losing their bearings.
Ashley crawls back to us like an injured animal. We grab her and I glare into Taylor’s eye. “We’re not dying here,” I command. “We’re not.”
She looks at me, not quite comprehending.
“I’m going to get help,” I whisper.
I bounce up onto my feet and search for a path through the debris to make it to the shattered window and out of the shop, but I stay frozen in my tracks wanting to make sure nothing else is coming through that window.
The adrenaline finally kicks in and I jump on the backs of both thugs. I yank their hair back screaming as loud as I can. I’m trying to make it impossible for them to pull their triggers at their intended targets.
Their heads jerk backward just as long as is necessary for Nate and Tomas who have just come through the shattered glass to attack them full-blast with their golf clubs. This was their plan?
Baldy elbows me hard in the face. I fall to the ground hard and already have the taste of blood in my mouth when Taylor and Ashley pull me back away from the four men doing battle.
Nate and Tomas strike our attackers with the clubs repeatedly. When G. manages to raise his gun, Nate kicks it right out of his hand. Tomas spins quickly with his club to land a vicious head shot to Baldy’s clean skull. The club breaks and Baldy crumbles to the ground.
Nate sits on G. now like he’s ready to make love but instead unleashes a barrage of punches to G.’s evil, blood splattered face. My relief turns to a fear they will not stop beating the criminals until they’re dead. It’s the last thing that I want Nate to have to live with.
“Stop!” I cry out trying to rise onto my shaky legs. “It’s enough.”
Nate lifts his head and stares at me confused. G’s blood has gotten all over Nate’s beautiful face. I can’t help but notice his pulsing muscles all dipped in glistening sweat. “It will never be enough,” he says, climbing to his feet.
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