by Susanne Beck
Nodding to each of us in turn, she turned crisply and disappeared back down the opposite hall to what I assumed was her own room, leaving Corinne and myself to stare after her in shocked silence.
* * *
I spent most of the rest of the day shuttling wildly between anger and grief, hope and despair. Part of me was so angry at Ice that I wanted, given the impossible opportunity, to throttle her. Though I well understood her innate need to see to it that I was safe as it was possible for me to be, I didn’t understand why that need had to come at the expense of my own innate need to see her, safe, whole, and, most importantly, free.
Much as it shames me to admit such a thing, part of me was glad Rio had bumped the rose from my hand and crushed it beneath the heel of her boot. The rest of me, however, spent long, painful moments on my knees, gathering up each and every petal I could find as some sort of tangible link to the woman who held my heart in her hands.
Since I knew that sleep wouldn’t let me catch him quite so easily the second time around, I gave up even bothering to try, and instead showered and changed, then padded out to the kitchen, where work had already begun preparing meals for a new day as yet undawned.
Pitching in allowed the time to pass quickly and mindlessly, and before I knew it, I was up to my elbows in soap suds, washing away the fruits of my morning labors.
The kitchen crew, at least for breakfast, was made up of an older, quieter group of women who seemed far more interested in getting the meal made and the dishes cleaned than expending energy on gossiping about who did what to whom, when, where, and how often.
That’s not to say there wasn’t talk, because there was; just not very much of it.
After the last dish was washed, dried, and put away, I escaped the suddenly too small confines of the house, and stepped out into the warm, bright desert day with a distinct feeling of relief. Taking in a deep, cleansing breath, I allowed my feet to take me where they would, not at all surprised to find myself once again perched atop a corral fence-post as the horses were released from their night-time abode.
The bay stallion, of course, led the way, and I felt a little smirk form, tipping my figurative hat to him for getting the plum job of being the only male around for miles. He snorted and bobbed his head at me, as if in agreement, before bounding away, most of the herd in tow.
I watched his antics with pleasure, enjoying the way the sunlight dappled his coat and brought the thick, corded muscles of his massive body into sharp relief. He reminded me, more than slightly, of the horse Ice had carved for me last Christmas—almost a year ago, now.
God, has it really been a year? How could time have gotten away from me that quickly? How could...
Any further thoughts along that maudlin line were halted as I felt a gentle nudge to my knee. Startled, I almost lost my balance, but maintained it by grabbing onto the nudger, which in this case happened to be the nose of a beautiful dappled gray pony, who indignantly snorted my fingers from her nostrils.
I couldn’t help but laugh (almost losing my balance again, incidentally) as she appraised me with one huge, dark eye before lowering her head to nudge against my leg again, this time higher against my thigh, her nostrils whuffling as if in search of a treat.
"I’m sorry girl," I said with genuine regret. "I don’t have anything for you."
A musical laugh sounded next to me, and I looked up to see Cowgirl astride a massive horse, the brim of her white Stetson tipped low to shade her face from the relentless sun. "Don’t worry about Cleo, Angel. She thinks she’s a puppy. C’mon, Cleo, give the woman some room. She’s not your personal feedbag."
"That’s alright," I replied, giving the horse a scratch between the eyes. "I don’t mind. She’s kinda sweet."
"Oh, she’s sweet alright. Keep paying attention to her like that and you’ll find yourself with an eight foot shadow for the rest of your life."
"Don’t mind the mean lady, Cleo," I stage whispered, continuing to scratch my newfound friend. "She’s just jealous ‘cause you only have eyes for me."
Cowgirl snorted as she led her horse around in a tight circle. "While I work on trying to get over my envy issues, would you like to take a ride with me? I need to fix some fence out on the back part of the corral and I’d enjoy the company."
I winced. "Well, as much as I love horses, I’m afraid I haven’t ridden one since I was a kid."
"That’s no problem. We’ll just let you ride your new friend there. She’s pretty forgiving."
I looked at Cleo, who tossed her head, then nudged me again.
"What the heck. Looks like I’ve been outvoted anyway."
* * *
The sun was very close to setting as I walked my tired, sweaty and saddle-sore body back toward the house. I was exhausted, beyond doubt, but pleasantly so. Cowgirl’s gentle company managed to keep my mind away from sadder things, and her sweet voice belting out country song after country song kept me laughing and humming along, though I couldn’t, as my father was wont to say, carry a tune in a bucket.
I stepped around Rio’s car, which was once again parked in front of the house, and spared a quick wave to Corinne, who was lounging by the pool with a bevy of naked beauties attending her every whim. Grinning and shaking my head at her good fortune, I opened the door and stepped into the house, just in time to see an almost exact replay of the scene early that very morning, this time set in the living room.
Both turned to me as I entered, but any thoughts of simply reversing my steps and spending the night in the stables was erased as Montana beckoned me forward with a smile.
"I... um... didn’t mean to interrupt. I’ll just... be going to my room to wash up."
"No, that’s alright, Angel. I’m actually glad you came back. I have some friends..."
Any further words were blocked out as I felt an unfamiliar, and somewhat gruff, hand clasp hard onto my left shoulder. Already tired and wary from the resentful glare I was getting from Rio, my body reacted without thought, doing what it had been trained to do when it perceived a threat.
Reaching up, I grabbed the hand on my shoulder, twisting the wrist as I thrust my hip out to the left. With a smooth, controlled motion, as I’d been so carefully taught, I threw the body behind me over my hip, then straddled it, glaring down at the idiot who dared to grab me from behind like that.
A glare which quickly changed to a look of shocked disbelief as I recognized the woman I’d just thrown to the floor.
"Pony? Is that you?"
"Surprise?" she wheezed through the broad, proud grin threatening to split her face in half.
"Pony!!" I yelled, grabbing her hand and hauling her back to her feet with adrenaline-fueled strength. "How did you... ? Where did you...?" The rest of my babbling questions were lost as I pulled her tight against me in a hug.
Chuckling low in her throat, she returned the embrace before lifting me off of my feet and twirling me around before setting me back down again. "Damn it’s good to see you again, Angel!" After giving each cheek a loud, smacking kiss, she pulled away to the length of her arms and boldly appraised me from head to toe, her eyes lingering longer in some places than others. "Lookin’ good," she said, leering.
"You’re not looking half bad yourself, Pony," I replied, laughing through my tears.
"I’ll bet you say that to all the studs, Angel," came a very familiar, very loved, and very much missed voice behind me.
Stunned, I whirled, feeling my jaw unhinge as I did so. "Critter?"
"Hey there, stranger." Her smile as bright as the Arizona sunshine, she opened her arms and I ran willingly into them, feeling her hug engulf me like the warmest of blankets.
"I don’t believe it," I blubbered. "I can’t believe you’re here. How... ?"
"Thank Donita and a very shocked parole board," she said, her own eyes suspiciously bright. "They sprung Pony and I together. I think they’re still trying to figure out why they did that."
"What about Sonny?"
Her sm
ile faltered just a little. "We’re hoping for a little better luck the next time around. She misses all of us, but she’s doing ok." She smirked. "She found a new looooove."
Laughing, I grabbed Pony’s arm and pulled them both in for another tight hug, happy beyond belief that these two old, beloved and cherished friends were with me once again, especially at a time when I needed them so very desperately.
After pulling away, I gave then each a long, assessing look. "Neither of you has changed a bit. Not a bit!"
"You sure as hell have!" Pony replied, poking at my belly and scowling. "Not that you weren’t a knockout before, Angel, but you’re positively buff now! What gives, woman? Ice put you on some steroids or something?"
I laughed. "No. Nothing like that. I came by these muscles honestly."
"Honestly? What’d ya do? Haul rocks around up there in bumfuck?"
"Pony!" Critter yelled, slapping Pony on the arm.
"Hey!" Pony yelped, rubbing her arm and scowling at Critter. "It’s an honest question! When I first saved her ass, she was all skin and bones and babyfat. Now she’s got more muscles than I do!"
Critter laughed. "God, Pony. You’re so butch."
"You got a problem with that?" She turned back to me. "Spill it, Angel. What do I gotta do to get a body like that?"
"Well, for starters," I replied through the smirk that was forming, "you could build your own house."
"Bu.... " Her eyes widened. "You built your own damn house??"
"Well, I didn’t build it myself, no. But I helped. A lot." I winced over the memory of strained muscles and splinters and blisters and everything else that went along with building our cabin. That wince quickly turned to a grin, however, when I remembered the tender care Ice took with my injuries, and the many evenings spent face down and blissfully naked as my lover’s hot hands expertly removed each and every bit of soreness from my abused muscles, replacing that soreness with languor, or passion, however she saw fit.
Looking up just in time to catch Critter’s knowing smile, I felt a blush heat my face and quickly looked down again, trying to regain my composure.
Completely oblivious, Pony poked me again. "I can’t believe you built your own damn house."
"Well, I did. I also chopped about a forest’s worth of firewood, walked almost everywhere I needed to go, and swam two miles in the lake every morning and every evening in the summer."
Absolute silence reigned as Pony stared me with eyes the size of silver dollars. After a long moment, she covered her face and shook her head. "Never mind," she mumbled through her fingers. "Forget I asked. I’ll just keep the body I got."
Grinning in absolute satisfaction, I turned to see Montana looking at us with an unreadable expression on her face. Of Rio, there was no sign at all. "Where’s Rio?"
"She left."
"Left?" Pony asked. "Where the hell’d she go? We were supposed to go over the security measures, damnit!"
"Something’s been eating at her all day," Critter supplied. "She’s not like her usual self at all. Is there a problem?"
"It’s been longer than all day," Montana replied, giving me a significant look.
That was something Pony didn’t miss. She whirled back to me, dark eyes narrow and penetrating. "What’s goin’ on, Angel."
"Nothing, Pony. We just... we didn’t hit it off real well, that’s all."
"That’s bullshit. You’d hit it off with the devil himself, Angel. What’s really goin’ on."
I shrugged. "I don’t know. There’s obviously something about me that rubs her the wrong way. I don’t know what it is, but I’m sure we can work it out eventually." I smiled. "Not everyone has to like me, you know."
"When I’m around, they do," Pony growled, fists clenched.
"Pony, calm down," Montana said. "It’s gone beyond that now. You know how proud she is. When I had her bring you and Critter in, she got upset. She thinks I’m questioning her abilities."
"And she’s blaming Angel for that? That’s absolute bullshit! If she’d done her job right in the first place, she wouldn’t have had to worry about it!"
"Pony..." This time, it was Critter’s turn to try.
"Forget it, Critter. I don’t know what damn bug flew up her ass, but I’m gonna pull it out for her. Through her throat."
"Pony, there’s a lot going on..."
"Fine. She can have a nice long time to think about it from the comfort of her own bed after I put her ass in traction."
As she turned to stomp away, I grabbed her arm, surprised at the ease with which I turned her back to me. "I appreciate this, Pony, but please, let me handle it myself, ok? When this whole thing cools down, I’ll try and have a talk with her. You can even come along and hide in the shadows if you want. Just please... this is between Rio and I. Let’s keep it there for now, alright?"
She scowled at me, obviously not ready to give up her anger, but finally nodded and gently pulled her arm away from my grasp. "Fine. But if you think I’m not gonna rag her ass over the security situation, you’ve got another thing coming. It’s not just Cavallo we need to worry about, you know. There’s a whole planet full of crazies who’d love to bomb this place off the fucking map. If she’s not doin’ her job right, then I’m gonna call her on it."
I returned the nod. "That’s fine. I’m guessing that since you’re down here, that’s your job."
"Damn right it is."
Critter laughed, pushing Pony toward the door. "Go scare the venom out of a rattlesnake or something, Cujo, willya?"
"Fine," she grumped, then turned and left the house without another word.
Unable to stop myself, I just threw back my head and laughed, crossing my arms over my stomach. "God, I missed you guys!"
"We missed you too, Angel," Critter replied, slinging an arm over my shoulder and ruffling my hair. "We missed you too."
* * *
"...and the next thing we knew, there she went, ass over elbows, right into the septic tank. The stink didn’t come out for weeks! It followed her around like a cloud."
I collapsed against the pillows, weak with laughter, not even bothering to wipe away the tears of mirth which were coursing down my cheeks.
"Yup," Critter continued, her face the very essence of the word ‘smug’. "Ol Mousie was never the same after that. I told her she’d wind up smelling like shit one day. I was right, too. Literally."
Rolling over onto my stomach, I tried desperately to stretch out the cramps that were tearing at my abdominal muscles, already abused from a day of horse riding and hard physical labor. "Stop," I gasped. "Please. You’re killing me over here."
"Sorry." She didn’t sound very sorry at all.
But she did stop, which was a blessed relief. When my hysteria finally got itself back under control, I flipped on my back again and propped myself up on my elbows, fixing her with a pointed look. "You’re bad."
"Sure am."
"Well," I said, sobering up a little, "much as I missed you guys, I don’t miss waking up every morning wondering if someone like Mouse or Derby is waiting to rearrange my face for looking at them the wrong way." Shaking my head, I sighed. "I just wish I don’t sometimes get that feeling when Rio’s around."
"I wish you didn’t either, Angel. I’m not sure what’s going on with her. Rio’s one of those really big people who scares the crap out of you to look at her, but she’s really sweet underneath. At least, she used to be. God knows what’s wrong with her now."
"So, you knew her before, then?"
"Yeah. In the Bog. She got there about a year after I did. She was huge even then, but those muscles were just for show. She couldn’t fight worth a spit in the rain."
"Really?" I asked, finding that hard to believe.
"Yeah. Really. She might have been strong, but she was slow, and clumsy as all hell. The bullies held off at first, because of her size, but once they found out she couldn’t fight, they were all over her like white on rice. It would have been pretty funny if it wasn’t so dam
n sad to watch."
"What happened?"
"Ice happened. They were giving Rio all kinds of holy hell out by the weight area one day. A few of them were holding her down with the barbell she was lifting pushed against her chest. The rest were punching and kicking the crap out of her. The rest of us were kinda standing by because it seemed like she was big enough to take care of herself, but evidently Ice didn’t think so, because she came out of the prison and before any of us could think to move, it was over." Her look of wonder was obvious as she thought about that incident. "Two of ‘em wound up in the hospital. The rest... well... let’s just say they weren’t in any shape to bully a tadpole for a few months."
I snorted softly. "Why am I not surprised?"
Critter grinned. "I’d be surprised if you were." She shifted positions, coming to lay on her back next to me, our heads sharing the same pillow. "So anyway, Ice sorta took Rio under her wing and taught her how to fight. She took to it like a duck to water, and before we knew it, she was using those muscles for more than just impressing the ladies."
"Did she ever bully anybody once she could fight?"
"Rio? No. Not at all. Like I said, she’s as sweet as they come. God, you should have seen the look on her face when Ice made her an Amazon. I thought she was gonna bust out crying in front of everyone."
I couldn’t help but shake my head in amazed disbelief. The picture of Rio that Critter was painting was as different from my own version as night is to day. Suddenly, a thought popped into my head. "Critter, were Rio and Ice..."
She looked at me for a long moment. "Are you asking me if they were lovers?"
I nodded.
Her brow furrowed, but after a moment, her expression cleared as understanding dawned. "You’re afraid she’s jealous, aren’t you."
"It would make sense, yes. An ex-lover having to play taxi-driver to the current lover, carting her to hell and back, then being told her skills aren’t enough to protect her." I shrugged. "I’d probably be angry too."