Claire considered her answer. Honesty was the best policy, no matter the consequence. “Tony, I do care about you. I want you to be happy, and I would do anything to help that happen, and on a night like tonight, or even a quiet night at home, I enjoy being with you.” She smiled. “…more than enjoy.” Her emerald eyes shimmered in the cold air. “However, honestly, there are times I don’t. There are times I want you away from me, or vice versa.” She maintained eye contact and watched for his reaction.
He smiled and leaned closer. His kiss was forceful, yet passionate. It wasn’t the reaction she’d expected. The relief overwhelmed her as she kissed him back.
When he pulled away, his tone was sincere. “You are the most amazing woman. I have vice presidents, presidents, and chairmen of boards who have never experienced me as you have. None of them would have the courage to answer that question as honestly as you just did.” She exhaled. “It’s your strength and determination that have infuriated me. That strength and resilience has also made me fall in love with you.”
Perhaps it shouldn’t have been a shock, but it was. He said that he loved her. He had her complete attention, and yet her internal monologue almost drowned out his voice: Love, really? He just said he loves me? Do I love him?
“Claire, I experienced life without you, after your accident. I don’t want to do that again, but I want you to make your own decision. Tonight I would like to present you with two options: your freedom. You may leave tonight and your debt is paid, or…” He removed a diamond solitaire ring from his jacket pocket. “…you could agree to marry me and spend the rest of your life with me, not out of obligation or contractual agreement, but because you want to be with me.”
Her heart beat rapidly, and her lungs momentarily forgot to breathe. She stared at Tony and at the ring. With only the illumination of the streetlamps, she saw the brilliant solitaire diamond. It was surrounded by a delicate diamond border with additional diamonds on the platinum band. She’d never seen anything so beautiful, and Tony was offering it to her. Her mind couldn’t stop spinning. She knew she should answer, speak, say something, but words failed her.
He continued, “You told me yesterday no more black boxes, so I took it out of its box.” He grinned. “Could we see if it fits?”
Claire nodded and extended her left hand. Tony smiled as he removed the fuzzy mitten and placed the ring on her fourth finger. She was suddenly glad she agreed to a manicure.
“It seems to fit.” Tony looked into her emerald eyes. “The question still seems to be unanswered. Do you want to keep it on and stay with me? Will you please be Claire Rawlings?”
She weighed her possibilities. He could be the most romantic man in the world. He was incredibly generous with his money, both to her, for whatever she needed, and others, thus much philanthropic recognition. He was the most amazing lover. She’d never in her life experienced sensual highs like she had with him. He was the only person whom she could talk with freely. He knew all about her, because he knew her private information, but—that was the word that haunted her—but he could be dark, mean, cruel, controlling, and sadistic. He was the reason for that private information. “I-I’m so surprised…” She stuttered. “…are you seriously asking me to marry you?”
He grinned and bowed his nose to hers. “Yes, my dear, this entire night has been leading to this proposal. I’ve watched you, with me, in private, in public, with my closest friends, and I want you there always. I love you.”
Again, internal debate: Love? He keeps using that word. Love, do I love him? I think I do. When did that happen? Oh my, Claire needed to think about this. The napkin thing happened too quickly, this needed contemplation. “Please,” she implored “Please, let me think. I promise you an answer soon.”
He waited patiently. The carriage steadily moved through the cold crisp air. She saw her breath as she looked at her hand and at Tony. She thought about his patience as she healed from her injuries, about him risking public exposure with Dr. Leonard, about how he made her feel when she saw him walk into a room. Her contemplation took a while. They sat back in the carriage. She rested her head on his shoulder and thought. He didn’t say a word or push. Instead, he waited and tenderly held her hand.
She could decide to leave, and do what? Go back to Atlanta. Did she still have an apartment? He waited. There was a side of him that frightened her, but the idea of living without him somehow frightened her more. She needed him. He told her that. More importantly, she loved him. She really did. Sometime during the last eight months he’d become her everything. Now when faced with the possibility, Claire couldn’t imagine her life without him in it.
Finally, she answered, “God help me, yes. Tony, I’ll marry you.” He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her tenderly. When their lips separated, Claire confessed, “I love you, too.” She watched his eyes glisten with the reflection of the white lights. It was a gaze she could watch forever. As the carriage continued through the park, Claire scooted closer, laid her head back on his shoulder, and looked again at her left hand.
Tony’s voice broke the momentary stillness. “If you don’t like the ring we can look at others. It’s from Tiffany’s. We can go Friday and exchange it.”
“Oh, no! I love the ring, besides you chose it. It’s exquisite. I’m just so surprised.” She thought of something. “Does Catherine know you were planning this?”
Tony said she suspected, but he hadn’t told anyone. He didn’t know her response. “I never go into a meeting that I don’t know the outcome. I’m always prepared for every situation. Tonight I wasn’t sure. You asked about your debt being paid a few months ago. I thought perhaps you would take that option.” He leaned down to kiss her hair. “I can’t tell you how happy I am you didn’t. I know Catherine will be too.”
When the carriage arrived back at Seventh Avenue, Eric had the limousine warm and waiting. As Tony helped Claire down from the carriage and led her to the car, and he told Eric, “My fiancée and I are ready to go back to the apartment.”
“Yes, sir. Congratulations, Mr. Rawlings, and to you too, Ms. Claire.”
That night after some of the most wonderful lovemaking Claire had ever experienced, she began to consider the reality that she was getting married, and that meant a wedding. “I don’t know how to plan a wedding to someone like you.”
“Someone like me?”
“You know what I mean. This won’t be your everyday Indiana or Iowa wedding. You’re Anthony Rawlings. We can’t go to dinner without photographers. A wedding will be a national spectator event.”
He chuckled. “My dear, that’s why there are wedding coordinators and planners. We’ll hire the best. They’ll assist in everything.”
That made Claire feel better. She wondered: if the wedding were a catastrophe; wouldn’t that be a public failure?
“By the way…” Tony added, “…how do you feel about a Christmas wedding?”
Her mind went into overdrive. “Christmas? As in four weeks from Saturday?”
“I can’t wait any longer than that to have you be my wife: Mrs. Anthony Rawlings.”
She knew from experience his mind was made up. With queasiness deep in the pit of her stomach, she replied, “I feel that you must hire the world’s best wedding coordinator and planner.”
Claire tried to sleep, but the panic of planning a wedding in four weeks made her suffocate. She lay next to her fiancée and attempted to make sense of everything. Maybe she needed to compartmentalize. One thing at a time: wedding, reception, dress, and maid-of-honor. “Tony, I’d like Emily to be my matron-of-honor.”
He was almost asleep, and his voice sounded far away. “We can discuss it tomorrow. Good night.”
“Good night.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
This is the finest measure of thanksgiving: a thankfulness that springs from love.
—William C. Skeath
They talked into the early morning about the wedding. Therefore, Thursday morning, Claire sle
pt soundly until after 9:00 AM. Sensing she was alone in the big bed, she focused her gaze on her left hand. On the fourth finger was a spectacular engagement ring. Smiling, she marveled at the reality. It wasn’t a dream. She was really marrying Anthony Rawlings. Until last night, Claire hadn’t allowed herself to think of Tony in terms of emotions or endearments. She knew she was having feelings, but she wouldn’t let herself elaborate; however, when he said he loved her, it opened a floodgate. She thought about her feelings and how she missed him when he was gone. How she enjoyed having him around to talk with. How he could make her feel special, and how she thought about him when they were apart. She realized, to her own amazement, she really did love him! She couldn’t contain her smile; this revelation was so astounding!
Claire wrapped herself in a thick long robe and walked downstairs to the dining room. As she approached, the rich poignant aroma of fresh coffee filled her lungs and brought her senses to life. Jan had coffee warm and ready. Tony wasn’t there. When she inquired, Jan informed her, “Mr. Rawlings is in his office. Ms. Claire, if I may? Congratulations.”
“Thank you, Jan. I’m sorry you have to work on Thanksgiving,” Claire offered, as Jan poured her coffee.
“It’s all right, miss. I’m looking forward to having guests this afternoon for dinner. We rarely entertain here.”
“Guests? I’m sorry. If Mr. Rawlings mentioned guests, with the excitement of our engagement, I’ve forgotten. Do you remember who’s joining us for Thanksgiving dinner?”
“I’m sorry. I don’t believe he told me names. I know there’ll be two, and they’re scheduled to arrive at 1:30 PM.” Jan convinced Claire to eat an English muffin and grapefruit. After breakfast, Claire went to Tony’s office door and heard him speaking. She may be his fiancée, but interrupting him uninvited in his office didn’t seem like a good idea. Perhaps some rules would change, but she knew if they did he would choose which rules and when.
Claire went back to their bedroom, showered, and thought about how glad she was she’d bought new clothes. If she needed to be the perfect companion for some business associates, she felt better in well-fitting clothes.
She chose a black pair of wool slacks and a pink knit sweater from Neiman Marcus. The black boots she decided to wear had high heels; Tony wouldn’t seem as tall. Dreamily, she thought about fuzzy socks and her new hoodie. Being Mrs. Rawlings would teach her to keep up appearances.
Actually, being Claire Nichols taught her that.
As she straightened her hair, Claire marveled at the new even lighter shade. The auburn showed through enough to be considered low lights, but she was definitely now a caramel blonde. Although Catherine packed many pieces of Claire’s new jewelry, she wanted to wear her grandmother’s necklace and the O earrings Tony brought her from Europe. She shook her head as she remembered the scene in the gardens that seemed so long ago. Once she was completely dressed, she relaxed on the bed and let her mind wander.
I’m going to marry Tony. I’m going to marry Tony in four weeks. I need a wedding dress. I need to call Emily. There are guests coming to dinner. Perhaps after dinner I can approach the Emily subject with Tony. Where will we marry? Who will we invite? Suddenly, a nice destination wedding anywhere, seemed like a good idea.
Her mind went from the wedding, to Thanksgiving. She could hardly believe it was truly Thanksgiving. She’d arrived at Tony’s house on March 20. Now she’d be eating Thanksgiving dinner with him and some associates and planning her wedding. She imagined drowning in chocolate sauce, too much of a good thing!
As a means of escape she let her mind float to childhood Thanksgivings. They usually went to her grandparents’ home, where Grandma made all the traditional foods. She remembered helping her grandma and mother bake pies. At Thanksgiving they usually had pumpkin, apple, and sometimes pecan and always too much food. Even when she lived with Emily and John, she baked pies and helped Emily with cooking. Part of her wanted to go down to the kitchen and offer to help; however, she instinctively knew it wouldn’t be appropriate.
Claire was somewhere deep in her memories when Tony entered the bedroom wearing slacks and a burgundy ribbed turtleneck sweater that looked wonderful stretched across his broad shoulders and chest. He wore suits so often, Claire liked seeing him in something other than a jacket and tie. He smiled and came closer. “Good morning, my fiancée.” He kissed her lips. “How are you feeling today?”
Claire propped herself up. “Good morning, to my fiancé. I feel well. I was just thinking about Thanksgivings when I was young. Did you eat all the traditional Thanksgiving foods when you were young?”
Sitting next to her on the edge of the bed, his eyes darkened. “Claire, don’t talk about the past. We have a future ahead of us, let’s look ahead.”
“I’m sorry, I guess I’m reminiscing.” She touched his arm. “Tony, who’s coming to dinner?”
“First, let me tell you…” Suddenly, his voice brimmed with excitement. “I’ve been on the telephone all morning. Patricia is going to contact Shelly, and a public statement regarding our engagement will be released tomorrow. Also, you have an appointment tomorrow at a very exclusive bridal boutique in Manhattan for a wedding gown. They’re expecting you, the future Mrs. Anthony Rawlings. They want to meet your every need.” He kissed her lips and continued to hold her gaze with his chocolate brown eyes. “I want you to have the wedding and the dress of your dreams. Patricia will also choose a wedding planner and coordinator to meet with us when we return to Iowa. Since Christmas is on a Saturday, the wedding will be December 18, which too is a Saturday. I hope you don’t mind, but with the wedding only three weeks away, I decided to have it at the estate. Now we don’t have to worry about booking a place, and security is already set. We just need to decide how many guests and where on the estate to hold the ceremony and reception. I did reach Catherine. She’s thrilled and told me to tell you so.”
Claire felt inundated: information overload! She laid her head back on the pillow and closed her eyes. “Maybe this is all happening too fast.” Tony didn’t say anything, but when she opened her eyes she saw the change in his expression and reached for his arm. “Tony, it isn’t that I don’t want to marry you. I do, but three weeks, that seems very rushed.”
He scooped her into his arms. “I promise you, money can make anything happen. Don’t worry about it. We’ll marry on December 18, and it will be amazing.”
“I just worry about disappointing you.”
“Claire, this is your wedding. I want you to be happy. I also know you’re not back to yourself. I don’t want you to overdo. Just enjoy all the things your money can buy and watch the wedding take shape. It’ll be spectacular.”
“My money can’t buy us a piece of gum.”
He laughed and kissed her. “My dear, in three weeks and two days you’ll be able to buy a gum factory if you want. I want you to share all that I have. You’ll have everything the world has to offer.”
Claire struggled with the meaning of his words. “Tony, I don’t want your money. I haven’t done anything to deserve part of your fortune. I’m happy to share your name. I don’t need any more.”
“My love, you’ve done more than you’ll ever know, and I’m pretty sure you’ll do more.” While he leaned down to kiss her, his hands were busily undoing the buttons on her slacks.
“Don’t we have guests coming?”
“They aren’t due until 1:30 PM. I’m pretty sure we can be successful, multiple times, before then.” He said with a sultry grin, as he removed her slacks. Straddling her legs he removed his sweater and undid his slacks. She watched his seductive smile and his muscular chest as it moved with breaths of anticipation. The scent of his cologne penetrated her senses, and she knew if he bent down she’d be able to taste it on his neck.
“But, Tony—” He put his finger to her lips.
“Shhh. I have better things for those beautiful lips to do than talk.”
They left the bedroom together just before 1:30 PM. As th
ey approached the steps Tony’s stance straightened as he said, “I’m sure you realize, but I’m going to say it for the sake of clarification. Just because we’re engaged, divulging private information is still forbidden.”
Claire looked up at his eyes and wondered what he possibly thought she would say to his associates. “I promise, I know that.” They continued to the front stairs, and muffled voices came from the sitting room below. “Now who am I meeting?” As she asked, the voices came into range, her eyes moistened, and she looked to Tony for confirmation. “Is it really them?”
He gently held her shoulders. “Yes, I invited them to surprise you for Thanksgiving, but now you have even bigger news to share.”
“I can tell them about our engagement?”
He smiled. “Of course, didn’t you say you wanted Emily to stand with you?” She wanted to run down the stairs or cry out, but his grip on her hand tightened. “Claire, follow my rules.”
“I will,” she replied, and obediently fell into step with her fiancé.
When the soles of their shoes hit the marble floor, John and Emily turned toward them. They’d been enjoying the view from the sitting room windows. Her family looked just as Claire remembered: John tall with dark blond hair and playful blue eyes, and Emily with the Nichols brown hair, cut short and sassy, and Claire’s sparkling green eyes. Claire ran to Emily and hugged her.
“I didn’t know you were coming. It’s a wonderful surprise. Oh, Emily, it’s so good to see you!” Then she hugged John. “And, John! Oh, let me introduce you to Anthony.”
Emily told Claire it was good to see her, too; however, she and John made eye contact, sharing an expression of concern. Claire looked so different. Nonetheless, they proceeded politely as Claire made introductions. “Anthony, this is my sister Emily, and Emily, this is my fiancé, Anthony Rawlings.” Tony emitted charm as he and Emily shook hands.
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