by RJ Crayton
He smiled and took her hand in his. “It changed a lot for you and me, but it doesn’t change much for him.”
She nodded, and then he pulled away from her and started toward the door. “You’re going right now?” she asked.
For some reason, she had expected him to stay with her longer.
“Yeah,” he said. “I promised Lijah I would stay away from you, and I don’t make promises lightly. He needs to know that you know, and there’s no need for me to keep that promise. It’s better to just do it right now.”
She agreed, and Josh motioned for her to follow him out of his apartment. She would let Josh take the initial pass at Lijah, and then talk to him later.
Chapter 4
Elaan went to the cafeteria to get lunch: peanut butter sandwich and some juice. She missed meat. They used to get weekly deliveries that included meat, but it had been three weeks since the last delivery. They were overdue and officials said it was because of concerns over possible contamination. One of the delivery workers had come down with the Helnoan virus. So there were no meats for now. Mainly they got staples, like peanut butter. It was the kind filled with preservatives that her mother would never have let her eat. Only organic peanut butter in the Woodson home. But this wasn’t the Woodson home. Here, they ate peanut butter that could survive an apocalypse because that was perhaps what was going on uptop, and because it was all they had.
Despite the lack of deliveries, the people in the compound weren’t entirely worried. The facility was stockpiled with long-lasting staples and even a bunch of that astronaut freeze-dried food. They hadn’t had to start using the freeze-dried stuff yet. There wasn’t much word from the uptop about when they would send more provisions.
Still, there was a bit of anxiety throughout the compound about the lack of supplies and the general secrecy that seemed to have sprung up when food deliveries stopped. Before, they felt like they got information. Now, they were in the dark. Before, they at least got news broadcasts in the common room. Now there weren’t any. Just movies. Old movies that showed people without earth-shattering problems. Disney flicks, musicals, even It’s a Wonderful Life. It felt anachronistic because it wasn’t Christmas, and Elaan associated Jimmy Stewart and Clarence the angel squarely with Christmas, not early September.
When Elaan finished her sandwich, she went to the common room. Nina was there, along with Sophie and Brad. There were a handful of other children, too. The movie Aladdin was playing. The genie was on screen asking what wish Aladdin wanted. If everyone in the compound had to agree on one wish, they’d all want a cure for this virus. Or maybe they’d wish for a cure to have been found six months ago, before so many people had died. Either way, she knew everyone’s wish would center on a cure. A cure meant the world could be right again, that they could go back to their normal lives, to their lives before the world got turned upside down.
Elaan sat on one of the sofas in the back of the room. The common area had several sofas and comfy chairs. Also, a stack of folding chairs sat in the corner. They tended to use those for “movie nights.” On those occasions, they showed a film many in the compound might enjoy. They’d had official movie nights twice a week when they first came down here. Back then, movie nights were announced on the public address system and officials encouraged families to come out. However, it had been at least two weeks since they’d tried to gather people together with a film.
Despite the failure to organize people, they still played flicks for the kids. She kicked back and watched the whimsical film for a few minutes. She wasn’t ready to go back to her apartment and see Lijah. She was laughing at something the genie had done, when someone tapped her on her shoulder. Elaan looked up and saw Nina standing over her. The woman inclined her head toward the door and walked out of the room. Elaan followed.
“Sorry to pull you from the movie,” Nina said when they got outside.
“It’s alright,” Elaan said with a smile. “I’ve seen it before.”
Nina laughed. “Of course you have,” she said. “It’s probably played every third day since we’ve been here.” Elaan chuckled, too. Nina was right. The woman tucked a stray hair behind her ear and put on a serious face. “I just wanted to check in and see how you’re doing. Especially with your father. I know he’s not been feeling as well.”
Elaan forced a smile. Nina had been asking about her father, if he was alright. His absences in the lab were noticed. While Dr. Wells had threatened to talk to military police about her father’s lack of performance, so far he hadn’t. She had told Nina that her father was fine, just still in mourning, but she did worry about his continued lack of responsiveness. Would they kick him out of the protection unit? And if they did, would they make Lijah go, too?
“My dad’s good,” she said. “Just some days are harder than others.”
“Well, if you need to talk, I’m here.”
“Thanks. I appreciate that.”
Nina leaned in and hugged Elaan. Nina was trying to be motherly, and on some level Elaan appreciated it. However, she still wanted Nina to just go. She didn’t want Nina feeling sorry for her that she was motherless. She didn’t want Nina scrutinizing her father any further, either.
Elaan pulled away from the hug, and Nina patted her on the shoulder. “I know it’s hard here,” Nina said, softly. “You’re in a tough position, loving your father and not wanting him to get in trouble. But, it’s also important the people in charge know what’s going on, Elaan.”
Nina offered a sympathetic look. “If you need help, you can tell me, and I’ll keep it as much as I can between us. I’ll just tell Greg. He’s a good man, and he will help your father.”
Elaan nodded, knowing that Nina was telling the truth. General Greg Sterling was a good man, and he probably would want to help. But if scientist housing was strictly for scientists helping fight the disease, no matter how good Greg was, he couldn’t keep her father there if her father wasn’t working. Greg was in the complex to help the government keep an eye on the scientists’ progress, as well as to preserve the health of some high-ranking military officials. She knew she couldn’t trust Greg and Nina to look out for her father’s best interest. “I know you and General Sterling care. I trust you,” she said. “If anything goes wrong, I’ll tell you. I’ll ask for help.”
“Good,” Nina said, offering a reassuring smile.
Elaan let out a breath of relief. She figured Nina was done prying. Elaan decided to change the subject. “So, what are you and General Sterling doing tonight?”
Nina gave her a blank stare.
Elaan searched her memory for today’s date. Down here nights and days all seemed to run together. She wondered if she’d gotten confused. “I thought you needed me to babysit for you. Your kids and Mrs. Jackson’s, too.”
“Oh, right,” said Nina, with a smile that looked fake. “With no place in particular to go, it’s easy to lose track of the dates. I can’t believe date night slipped my mind. Good thing I already asked you.”
Elaan smiled and turned to go. Then Nina grabbed her shoulder. “Wait.”
Elaan turned back and Nina was torn, her lip quirked up to the side in thought. “I’ll be honest with you,” she said, lowering her voice and scanning the hallway. Elaan surveyed the area, too, and saw no one within earshot. “Greg got called to the uptop to find out about the food. But people aren’t supposed to know.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “I think he just doesn’t want to get people’s hopes up if the answers aren’t what people expect. It’s a good thing he’s going uptop. But, I’m telling you this because I trust you.” She patted Elaan’s arm. “You can trust me, too. And still come by tonight. I think Gemma and I will have a ladies’ night without the kids. You can still come, right?”
“Absolutely, I’ve been looking forward to it. I’ll get to try some of the strategies in the book you recommended.”
Nina was an early childhood education professor at the Univ
ersity of Maryland and had probably been more willing to bond with her because of Elaan’s desire to be a teacher when she finished school. “I’m glad you liked it,” Nina said. “Though actually putting it into practice is always a little different than reading about it.”
“I know,” Elaan said.
Nina was nodding when she suddenly stopped and looked past Elaan. “Elijah,” she said.
Elaan heard Lijah say, “Hi, Mrs. Sterling.”
Nina frowned at Lijah. “You’re too grim for such a young man.”
Elaan turned just in time to see Lijah push his features into a smile for Nina.
Using both hands, he pointed both hands at his cheeks. “Is that better?”
“Infinitely,” Nina replied. Then she looked between Elaan and Lijah and said, “You’ve probably come for your sister.”
Lijah nodded.
“Then I’ll let you two have at it,” she said, turning back toward the common room. “Back to my 111th viewing of Aladdin.”
Lijah lifted a hand and motioned Elaan to follow him. She did. They walked in silence back to their apartment, and once they were inside, Lijah turned to her, eyes alight with fury and nostrils flared.
“Eavesdropping?” That single word was wrapped in anger.
She looked him in the eye. “Eavesdropping is wrong, and I’m sorry, but I’m not sorry that I heard what you were talking about.”
He shook his head and spat back, “I can see that.”
“You don’t get to meddle in my life, even if you are my big brother,” she said, pausing to see if he’d say anything. He was silent. “Since you’re so concerned for my welfare, why don’t you tell me what the secret is that you think will hurt me?”
Lijah stared at her, trying to discern something, but Elaan couldn’t figure out what. “So, he really didn’t tell you?”
She shook her head, surprised he thought she and Josh would both lie to him. “No, he didn’t,” she said. “He told me it wasn’t entirely his secret to tell.”
Lijah rubbed his temples. “Fine,” he said, then turned and walked away.
“Wait,” Elaan said. “Where are you going?”
“My room,” Lijah said.
“But you can’t. We’re not finished.”
He turned back to her and snarled, “What more do you want?”
Elaan stared at him, venom in his eyes and a scowl on his lips, wondering how they’d gotten to this place. “I don’t want you to be mad at me,” she said, finally.
He sucked in a breath. “Well, I am mad.”
“Because I eavesdropped?” It wasn’t right what she’d done, but his level of hostility toward her seemed disproportionate to the offense.
“Because you don’t trust me. I tell you Josh isn’t good for you, and you don’t believe me. You listen to a private conversation, and you overhear things that weren’t meant for your ears. Now, you and Josh are going to be together, and he is going to hurt you and that makes me upset.”
“He’s not going to hurt me,” she retorted.
“He’s already hurting you,” Lijah said. She stared at him, trying to puzzle out what he meant. “Look at you. You want to know his secret and it’s eating at you. You’re like Mom that way.” His voice was acid, and he’d meant that part about their mother as an insult.
“She’s dead, Lijah,” Elaan said, biting back tears. “Why do you hate her so? Why do you hate everything about her?”
Lijah pursed his lips and stared. The tension hung in the air, the only sound in the room their breathing. “Mom,” he said, finally, that single word coming out like poison, “said that the truth was the most important thing, that that was what most mattered. That’s what she talked about. That’s what she preached. She said she could deal better with any harsh truth than a pretty lie. But, that’s naive and unrealistic. Sometimes the truth isn’t better. Sometimes the truth is just painful. Just like Mom, you want the truth. Always. You think it will be better, and the fact that you won’t get the truth is something you won’t accept. Here’s the thing, though, Elaan. If you do find out the truth, you won’t accept that either.”
With that, Lijah turned and walked away. Elaan just stood there, stunned. She wanted the truth, but Lijah was right on some level. Not knowing the truth was already starting to gnaw at her, already starting to make her doubt her assessment of Josh. But was Lijah right about his other assertion? If she knew the truth, would she be unable to accept that, too?
Chapter 5
Her smartphone was probably the thing Elaan missed most down here. She wanted to text Josh, tell him to meet her. Only, she couldn’t. Family members hadn’t been allowed to bring cell phones, mainly because they didn’t work on the lowermost living levels. And they were discouraged in the upper lab levels, because their signals could interfere with equipment.
Down here, they could only communicate through landlines in the apartment. It wasn’t even a real telephone system; just some internal connection system that linked the rooms. It couldn’t actually dial real telephone numbers to the outside world. She hated being cut off from everything and unable to communicate quickly with the person she wanted to talk to. No one had answered when she called Josh’s apartment, which was not good. But it would have been worse if his father had answered. She didn’t want to talk to Kingston Wells or leave a message with him. She’d considered going over to Josh’s apartment and leaving a note on the door, but she didn’t want Dr. Wells to know she’d been there. It seemed silly, even in her own mind, that she should care that Dr. Wells knew, but she did. Especially since Lijah was on a first-name basis with him.
She decided to go the library. The books on the shelves were mainly military and medical manuals. All the pleasure reading was electronic. If there were a power outage, they wanted the medical and military officers to have paper copies of reference documents they needed, but pleasure reading was dependent on power. There was a computer checkout terminal, and the library had a cart of e-readers people could use.
People running the facility preferred e-readers charge in a central hub in the library. Something about it being a more efficient use of electricity. She’d left an e-reader in the hub this morning and was stopping by now to pick it up and grab a couple more books. The lack of wireless connectivity — at least lack of connectivity for civilian citizens down here; she’d heard the military had a wireless network they used — meant she had to hook a wire from the library computer to the e-reader to get new books.
When she arrived, she found Josh. He was using the library’s computer to transfer e-books to an e-reader. When he saw her come in, he smiled. “Hey,” he said.
She got a flutter in her belly and felt her face flush slightly. His perfect plump lips curving into that honest, genuine smile always sent a wave of pleasure through her. “Hey there yourself,” she said, smiling back and trying not to trip as she walked toward him.
He was seated in front of the computer screen, so she grabbed an e-reader and pulled up a chair next to him. “You getting a book?” she asked. Almost immediately, she silently cursed herself for the stupidity of it. Of course he was getting a book. What else would he be doing in the library? She felt a tinge of embarrassment, but Josh seemed unbothered by the question.
“Yeah,” he said, with a chuckle that brought out his dimple. “Trying something different — Playing Charlie Cool by Laurie Boris. Lijah recommended it.”
She raised an eyebrow. She didn’t think Lijah read much beyond science journals and Star Trek fan fiction. “He did?”
Josh nodded. “Yeah, he did.” His smile disappeared; he looked almost somber now. “So, how did it go when you talked to him?”
“He was unduly pissed off at me,” Elaan admitted. “I mean, he should be mad that I eavesdropped. But, not that mad. I don’t know why he’s so angry at me.”
Josh pursed his lips, breathed out. “I’m surprised,” he said, softly. Elaan stared at him, wondering why he was surprised. He was the one who thought Lijah wo
uld be so upset with her that she shouldn’t even be the one to tell him. He looked at her sheepishly. “It’s just he wasn’t happy when I told him what you’d overheard, but he wasn’t as mad as I thought he’d be. He asked me what I’d told you and I told him. Then he just gave me this kinda pissed off, ‘Fine’ and left. He didn’t yell at me for not doing my part, which I was sure he was gonna.”
That was weird. Or maybe not. Josh was Lijah’s friend. Lijah had always been a bit of a loner, and it didn’t seem likely he’d lash out at a friend the way he’d lash out at his sister. Though Lijah had been fairly harsh on Josh when she’d overheard them. Ugh. She had no idea what to make of this.
“Hey,” Josh said. “Don’t look so worried. Lijah is your brother, and he loves you.”
Elaan couldn’t help staring. A lecture from Josh on the fact that her brother loved her? Had she drifted into the Twilight Zone?
Josh laughed. “Don’t look at me like that,” he said. “I’m not taking Lijah’s side. I know you sometimes think he’s an annoying big brother, but a lot of the stuff he does, he does because he loves you. I’m sure whatever anger he’s feeling, he’ll get over.”
Elaan nodded, though she wasn’t entirely convinced Lijah would “get over” it. He’d been pretty mad at her. Still, the fact that Josh was sure he’d get over it made her feel a little better. Josh was good at reading people, so his assessment of Lijah’s mood was as good as anyone’s. She hoped Josh was right, because as annoying as Lijah could get, she still didn’t like him being so upset with her.
“Guess what,” Josh said, changing the mood with a mischievous grin on his face.
“What?”
“A certain general lent me one of his DVDs and my laptop is charging right now, so if you want to see The Princess Bride, we could watch it at my place tonight.”
Elaan frowned. “I’m sorry, I can’t tonight,” she said. “I promised Nina I’d babysit her kids and the Jackson kids. I’m sorry.”