"No," she lied. "I’m not tired. Do you want to go for a walk and talk for awhile?"
Ayalah’s face brightened.
"I would love to. If you’re sure you’re not too tired."
Mara forced a smile to her lips, and motioned for her sister to follow her. Together they walked through the citadel’s front gate past the solitary soldier who guarded it. Once they were well away from Saul’s citadel-palace, they resumed their conversation.
"I know I should have more faith in God," Ayalah said. "I know I should trust He’ll protect Josiah. But there’s a part of me that can’t help but feel afraid. I fear I’ll never see him again. I fear I’ll never get another chance to tell him how much I truly care about him."
"I’m sure he realizes your heart and prayers are with him," Mara said. "Maybe this will all end up being for the best. Maybe this will make him realize just how important you are to him, and he’ll finally have the courage to let father know how the two of you feel about each other."
"The last time I was with him, he hinted about a betrothal," Ayalah said. A faint smile crossed her lips. "Maybe when he comes back…if he does come back…"
"Don’t talk that way!" Mara cautioned. "You have to be positive, Ayalah. He will come back. You have to believe it will be so."
Ayalah nodded, but Mara could see the turmoil in her sister’s eyes. Mara didn’t envy her sister the anguished emotions she must be feeling, but she did envy one thing. Ayalah had someone she loved who loved her back. She had the hope of a future with him. What were the odds Mara would find love while stuck in Saul’s citadel serving Michal?
A dark wave of depression washed over her. The odds were zero. She already knew this, and she was powerless to change it.
Chapter Seven
ז
And Saul and the men of Israel were
gathered together, and pitched
by the valley of Elah, and set the battle
in array against the Philistines.
1 Samuel 17:2
"It must have been nice to escape from Bethlehem for all that time," Tobiah said. "Do you miss Gibeah? Do you wish you could go back?"
"There are things I miss about Saul’s court," David admitted, "but there was much I missed about Bethlehem when I was away. It’s good to be back in the my father’s home. It’s good to walk the hills and see familiar sights."
Tobiah gave David a skeptical look.
"Before you left Bethlehem the only thing the two of us ever talked about was getting far away from this place. Be honest with me, David. How was it? How was it really?"
"It was nothing as spectacular as you seem to think it is," David said, laughing quietly. "Most of the time I was bored beyond belief. I played the harp for Saul. I gave lessons to one of his daughters. The rest of the time I wandered his citadel looking for people to talk to or things to do."
Tobiah was still unconvinced. It was obvious David was holding something back. He knew he was right the moment he asked his next question.
"Who is she? A servant? A royal advisor’s daughter?" He paused and narrowed his eyes, a wicked smile on his lips. "Or could it be…a princess?"
David’s face flushed, and now it was Tobiah’s turn to laugh. It wasn’t often someone could bring a blush to David’s face. David’s quick sense of humor usually saved him from that sort of thing; but this time he’d been bested, and he sheepishly nodded.
"Yes, I admit it. I am interested in one of Saul’s daughters. It’s Michal. His youngest daughter. From the moment we first met, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her."
"I’ve heard she’s very pretty," Tobiah offered.
"Pretty? She’s beautiful! But I hardly get to speak to her. Every time I think I’ll get a chance, her older sister, Merab, shows up and ruins it."
Tobiah laughed again, and David stopped to glare at him.
"What are you laughing at now?"
"It’s nothing," Tobiah said, holding his stomach as he tried not to fall off the low stone wall where he was sitting. "It’s just that even in Saul’s court nothing changes with you."
"What’s that supposed to mean?"
"It means when you were here, all Bethlehem’s girls were madly in love with you. Now you’re a member of Saul’s court, and two princesses are fighting over you. What’s next, David? Are you going to take Saul’s place as king?"
He hadn’t meant it as anything more than a joke. When he said it, he wasn’t thinking about Samuel’s strange visit to Bethlehem, but his words had an immediate and powerful effect upon his cousin.
"Saul is the Lord’s anointed servant. I don’t have plans to take his kingdom away from him."
"I’m not accusing you of treason," Tobiah replied, his laughter fading. "It was just a joke. I meant nothing by it. Really, David."
David relaxed a little, but he looked deeply troubled. He was never bothered by anything the way he seemed to be bothered by this. That troubled Tobiah as well.
"You can’t help that Samuel came to Bethlehem to find you," Tobiah said. "You didn’t ask to be anointed. The Lord sent Samuel to bring the anointing to you."
David looked up from his sandals, which he had been staring at with grave intensity. He locked gazes with Tobiah.
"You understand my anointing’s meaning?"
"My family has known for quite some time now. But we’ve kept it to ourselves. We won’t be going around spilling your secret."
He deliberately failed to mention the trip he and his father had made to Hebron or the discussion with Barak and Rebecca. David’s already burdened mind didn’t need the extra bit of knowledge.
"I thought you might have known," David admitted after a moment, "but I didn’t dare say anything about it. My father warned me to keep this to myself. He hasn’t even explained it to my brothers and sisters. But someone other than our two families must have understood or at least guessed at Samuel’s meaning. Rumors have already been reaching Saul."
"Do you think he knows it’s you?"
"No. At least I don’t think so. But whether I was anointed to be a king or not, I have no intention of lifting my hand against Saul."
Tobiah was tempted to ask what David would do if Saul lifted a hand against him but quickly decided against it. Instead he said, "No matter what happens, you can always count on my help. You know this, don’t you?"
David clapped a hand on Tobiah’s shoulder and smiled. It was a fatherly gesture and, for some reason, Tobiah didn’t like it.
"You’ve always been a good friend, Tobiah. I’ll never ask you for anything more."
Tobiah struggled to find an appropriate response, but he was interrupted before he could speak.
"David? Are you out there?"
It was Hannah’s voice – David’s mother – calling from the house. Both boys turned toward her as she stepped outside.
"I’m here, Mother," David called back. "I was talking with Tobiah."
Hannah smiled and nodded at Tobiah. Then she turned back to David and said, "Dinner is waiting when you’re ready. Don’t be too much longer."
"I’ll be just a minute," he replied as Hannah disappeared back into the house.
"We can talk again tomorrow," he said to Tobiah. "Will it be your turn to watch your father’s sheep?"
"Yes."
"Good. We’ll graze our flocks together, and I’ll tell you more about Michal. She’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. She’s absolutely wonderful, Tobiah."
He stared dreamily at the brilliant red and orange sunset, and finally, realizing Tobiah was still watching him, he gave his cousin a sheepish grin.
"I guess I’d better go inside before my meal gets any colder. Shalom, Tobiah. I’ll meet you tomorrow."
"Shalom, David. Be sure to get up bright and early."
David placed a hand on the stone wall, vaulted over it, and vanished into the house; but Tobiah remained where he was, staring at the sunset alone.
David’s earlier comment still bothered him. Ther
e was a time when David treated Tobiah like an equal, but things had changed now that David had been to Gibeah. When he put his hand on Tobiah’s shoulder and spoke of him as a ‘good friend,’ it was like…like… Well, it was almost like an older man speaking to a little boy.
Tobiah clenched his teeth, moved away from the wall, and kicked a small stone up the path. He wanted to be David’s friend. He wanted their friendship to always survive. But he wanted more besides. He wanted to be David’s comrade-in-arms. He wanted to stand next to David on the path to David’s kingship.
The frown deepened on Tobiah’s face. Things were definitely changing, but no matter how things changed, he always seemed to get left behind.
—
There was something different about Michal this morning. Mara couldn’t put her finger on it at first, but then it struck her like lightning. Michal was smiling. For the first time since David returned to Bethlehem, there was a genuine smile on Michal’s lips.
"Have you heard?" Michal asked as Mara took a dress from a cedar wardrobe chest and helped her pull it over her head. "Have you heard the exceptionally wonderful good news?"
"No, I’m afraid I haven’t." She stooped to quickly tie a sash around Michal’s waist. "What is it? Is David coming back?"
"No," Michal replied, barely able to contain her glee. "That would be good, too, but this is even better. Merab is getting married!"
Mara stared at Michal, puzzled. It was odd enough to come into the room and find a smile on her cousin’s face. It was stranger still that Michal would find joy in the announcement of her older sister’s marriage.
"I don’t understand," Mara finally said. "I never even heard Merab was to be betrothed."
"She wasn’t!" Michal laughed and danced around the room. "But she will be soon. My father sent back word that he’s offered Merab as a reward to whichever one of his soldiers can kill the giant man – What’s his name? Goliath? – who fights for the Philistine armies. When the war is over and David comes back – and I’m sure my father will bring him back – Merab will no longer be in the way. She’ll be so busy getting ready for her marriage she won’t have a spare moment to spend with David. Isn’t it wonderful? She’s finally gotten what she deserves!"
"Yes. I guess."
Mara guided Michal onto a chair, picked up a tortoise-shell comb, and slowly began to pull it through Michal’s long, dark hair.
"How is Merab reacting to this news?" she asked. "Is she angry? Upset?"
"She’s devastated!" Michal replied, giggling. "Mother didn’t seem too happy about it either, but she’d never dare contradict Father’s wishes. He’s made a decree, and now he’ll have to honor it. Whoever kills the giant – no matter how ugly or stupid or oafish he is – will become Merab’s new husband!"
Poor Merab. No matter how horrible she sometimes was, she didn’t deserve this. Mara couldn’t help but feel sorry for her, and it bothered her Michal took such delight in her own sister’s misfortune.
"Has the queen received any other news from the battlefield?" Mara asked, seeking to deflect Michal’s attention – and joy – away from Merab’s awful predicament. "Are our soldiers defeating the Philistines in the Shephelah?"
Michal shrugged in a disinterested way.
"Father didn’t give much information about that. But Jonathan sent mother a letter of his own. He thinks the battle will be a long and hard one – that it will last many days. He’s usually right about these things, but I’m hoping they’ll somehow manage to kill the giant quickly. The sooner Merab leaves the citadel with her new husband, the better. Good riddance! That’s what I say!"
"Don’t you think you might miss Merab once she’s gone?"
Mara wasn’t exactly sure why she said this. Maybe because it felt so wrong for two sisters to harbor such animosity toward each other. But Michal bristled at the suggestion.
"Miss her? I think we should plan a banquet to celebrate her departure. Have you forgotten how mean-spirited and spiteful she is? Honestly, Mara, I’d think you’d be celebrating with me. Whose side are you on anyway?"
"I’m… I’m on your side. Of course. But I do feel sorry for her. Imagine how terrified she must be."
"Well, I don’t feel bad for her," Michal huffed. She folded her arms stubbornly across her chest and glowered. "Anything Merab gets will serve her right. She spent all her time trying to make me suffer, and now her turn has finally come."
"I still feel sorry for her," Mara mumbled. "I wouldn’t want to be in her place."
Both girls fell silent. The only sound to be heard was the soft rustle made by the comb as it passed through Michal’s lustrous black hair. When Michal finally saw fit to speak again, her voice was cold and testy.
"I’m hungry," she said. "Do you think the cooks have finished preparing the morning meal?"
"I don’t know. Would you like me to check?"
"Yes. Do it. And bring my breakfast to my room if it’s ready."
Mara nodded, placed Michal’s comb on the nearby dressing table, and happily departed.
She didn’t usually contradict or disagree with Michal. Michal could be as spiteful as Merab when she wanted, and it was never a wise choice to anger the mistress one served. Usually Mara just agreed with Michal whether she was truly of the same opinion or not. But lately Mara had grown more and more tired of living her life with no opinions, desires, or beliefs of her own. From now on she would need to be more careful about what she said.
The sky above the courtyard was clear and blue. It made Mara feel as if she could look straight up into the heavens to God’s throne. She wished sometimes she could have a face to face conversation with Him. She had so many questions – questions about her future and purpose on earth. But maybe it was better she couldn’t have that conversation. She might not like the answers she received.
Mara sighed, and the smell of freshly baked bread wafted to her nose. Breakfast must be ready. At least Michal would have something other than Merab’s misfortunes to be happy about.
Chapter Eight
ח
And Jesse said unto David, his son, Take
now for thy brethren an ephah of
this parched corn, and these ten loaves, and
run to the camp to thy brethren…
1 Samuel 17:17
"You wouldn’t happen to know where Tobiah is, would you?"
Caleb placed a small bundle of wood on the floor beside the kitchen oven before turning to face Athaliah.
"Where else? With David again, listening to David’s stories about Saul’s court."
"He can’t seem to live in the present, can he?" Athaliah muttered. "His mind always has to be elsewhere. He always has to be dreaming of adventure."
"Yes. He does tend to be that way, but at least David’s stories give him something to think about other than the fact he isn’t in the Nahal ha-Elah helping to fight the battle."
"I’m glad he’s not there," Athaliah said. "And he should be glad, too. Not a day passes without worry casting its shadow over me. I’m always frightened for Joel and Seth. I’m always afraid some messenger will show up at our door to tell me one of them is dead."
"I have those same worries," Caleb admitted. "But their poor wives, Rachel and Naomi, carry a greater burden than the rest of us. The best we can do is find solace in prayer and faith."
Athaliah didn’t respond to this. He could tell by the look in her eyes she didn’t find solace in either of these things.
"I’m glad Saul sent David home," she finally said. "A part of me lived in constant fear Tobiah would run off to Gibeah to join the adventure. He seemed to settle down a little once David finally returned."
Caleb nodded. He knew how much Athaliah worried about this. And it made him worry how she would respond to what he was about to suggest next.
"I spoke with Jesse earlier today," he said. "Hannah is sick with worry about their three oldest sons. Just like us, they haven’t received much word from their boys since they left to fight the Phil
istines. No one knows at this point if they’re injured or well, dead or alive. Jesse plans to send David with some gifts for his brothers to find out how they’re doing. David can then bring news back."
Athaliah shuddered. "The last thing I’d want would be to send another of my sons to that valley. And Tobiah… Well, …he’s going to be impossible to live with once he finds out where David’s going."
"I know. And this is why I’ve been thinking we should let Tobiah go with David."
"What!"
Athaliah nearly dropped the earthenware bowl in her hands, and she stared at Caleb with her mouth agape.
"Jesse was hesitant to ask this," Caleb cautiously continued, "but he was wondering if we’d allow Tobiah to accompany David on the journey. He’d rather David not travel alone, and he thought we might like to send a few things to our own sons — food or letters — the way he and Hannah are doing for their boys."
"You want to send Tobiah into the middle of a battle? You want to encourage his obsession with warfare?"
"Of course not. His safety is as important to me as it is to you. And he won’t be going into the middle of the battle — only to the camp. I’m not so sure shielding Tobiah from war’s harsh realities is the best way to break him of his obsession. Maybe the sight of misery and fear will do for him what all our counsel hasn’t. He’ll be fine. David will make sure he gets there and back again."
"And what if your plan doesn’t work? What if Tobiah becomes even more determined to become a soldier?"
"Do you really think keeping him here will change it?"
Athaliah noisily set her bowl on the table, turned, and stooped to shove a chunk of wood into the kitchen oven. She kept her back to Caleb when she stood again.
"You can’t guarantee me Tobiah will be safe. He’ll be within reach of a powerful Philistine army."
"I can’t guarantee his safety against bears and lions when he goes out to tend the sheep, but he comes home safely every evening."
"This is different!" Athaliah snapped, whirling on him now. "And you know it!"
Caleb sighed, lowered his eyes, and wearily shook his head.
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