Slamming his beer down on the table, Eric cursed loudly. The nasty word echoed off the walls of the almost empty bar, leaving a hallow feeling in his gut as the few other people in the bar turned their heads to stare at him. “Why is this happening to me?” he finally asked when his ire finally faded and became the heart ache he’d grown so familiar with ever since he’d gotten that call that had told him that he’d lost everything that mattered to him in a stupid car accident that never should have happened.
Jeff patted his hand awkwardly. “I don’t know,” he answered truthfully. “Maybe Vic is up in Heaven, looking down on you, trying to tell you that it’s time you started living again… REALLY living,” he clarified when Eric opened his mouth and started to claim that he was living the best he knew how without the only woman he’d ever loved.
“I can’t…” Eric argued as tears filled his eyes. “I don’t know how…” The admission came out in a whimper that sounded as if it had been ripped from his very soul by force.
“It could very well be that she’s helped make this happen to try to force you to figure it out,” Jeff suggested quietly. “All I know for sure is that there is a reason why this is happening… Someone upstairs has decided that it was time for you to stop acting as if you’d climbed into that hole in the ground with Victoria and started to live. I’ve been worried about you ever since the day she died. You forget… I was there with you, when you got that dreaded call, big brother. I saw first-hand what it did to you. It’s time to let it go… to let HER go.”
A broken laugh came from deep in Eric’s throat. “You think I haven’t tried to figure out how to go on without her? That I don’t know how broken I am with her gone? I have and I do. I just don’t know how to go on without her. I don’t WANT to. Every day, I wish I’d been the one to go in her stead. Each and every lousy day, Jeff. Now, I’m facing fatherhood to those babies she wanted so badly, without her and I don’t have a clue how to deal with it… All I know is that I have to FIND a way… because I gave Victoria my word that I would be a father to the tiny little lives we created in that damn lab that day.”
“Well… for the sake of your child … or children… If you really mean that, you’d best find a way to pull your head out of your ass, big brother. Because if you’re honestly going to be any kind of a father, you are going to need to be a whole man. Otherwise, your son or daughter is going to grow up not knowing how to love.”
Eric sighed heavily and nodded his head in begrudging agreement. In his head, he knew that his little brother was right. The hard part would be getting his stubborn broken heart in the game. He had a scary feeling it would be the hardest thing he’d ever forced himself to do.
Chapter 4
The last two weeks had been Hell on Earth for Madeline. She’d been through every emotion in the book at least five times each. Her friends had been understanding but nothing they had said or done had been enough to shake her worry that something horrible would happen and the expensive procedure she’d put herself through wouldn’t take.
She sat on the edge of the examination table in the clinic, playing with the edges of the cloth gown she was wearing, looking nervously over at the woman who was silently standing at the counter with a vial in her hand, wiggling it back and forth to shake its contents. Madeline’s eyes followed the plastic container as if she would have a clue what the color change the liquid inside took, meant.
Swallowing hard, she watched the woman’s facial features, trying to read her expression one way or the other. Finally giving up, she cleared her throat and asked.
“Well?”
The woman looked over her shoulder and offered a smile. “The test looks good. I’m going to have my assistant bring in an ultrasound machine to confirm, but it looks like the procedure was a success.”
A broad smile covered Madeline’s face as she lay back on the paper sheet covered bed. “Will we be able to tell how many babies I’ll be having?” she asked excitedly as she gripped the paper on either side of her body; anxious for that first chance to catch a glimpse of her unborn child or children.
“Assuming the test is correct, unless one or more are hidden behind each other, yes. I believe it’s early enough in the game to be able to see how many of the eggs took hold.”
Madeline’s eyes stared unblinking at the monitor as the doctor dragged the scanner over her flat belly. The wand paused as a group of cells showed up on the screen. “Well, hello there,” the doctor said, patting Madeline on the shoulder with the hand that wasn’t holding the wand. “We definitely have one that took,” she assured the excited new mommy to be.
After carefully examining the remainder of her uterine wall for any more embryos, the doctor turned the machine off. “Well, one is better than none. Congratulations, Madeline. You’re going to be a mother. My advice is to choose a personal OBGYN as soon as possible and get in to see them. I’ll write you a script for prenatal vitamins. Do let us know how everything turns out…”
“Oh, I will,” Madeline assured the woman excitedly. “Will you thank Doctor Novak for me?” she asked, as tears of happiness filled her eyes. The man who’d extracted her eggs had been a God send, and she knew that since he was also the man who’d told her about the sperm donor program in the first place, that she owed him a lot.
Promising herself that she would send the good doctor a thank you card, she hopped up and gathered her clothes from the floor. Now that she knew for sure that she was going to have a baby, she had a lot of plans to make.
Outside in the bright summer sun, Madeline looked up at the blue sky. A few wisps of clouds dotted the sky, but the sun shone through them, giving off a warm peaceful promise. She felt like she was on top of the world. All of those years of working hard and careful living had paid off because she’d been able to save her money. That little nest egg she’d built had made this day possible and she wasn’t going to allow anything or anyone to rain on her parade.
A secret smile covered her face as she began to stroll towards her car. Her hand settled over her stomach just before she climbed behind the wheel. “We are going to be so happy together, little one,” she promised. Her eyes caught the flower bed just to the side of the building she’d just left. It was filled with lilies and roses. In that moment, Madeline decided that should the baby turn out to be a girl, she was going to name her Lillie Rose. It was a fitting name for what she was sure would be a beautiful baby girl. She’d worry about a boy’s name when and if she found that she needed to come up with one.
Something in her told her that it wouldn’t be necessary. She knew in her gut that the child she carried was a girl. She had no idea how she knew, but there wasn’t a doubt in her mind. She already felt such a connection to the baby that grew within her… A soft look of complete bliss and awe came over her face as she stuck the key in the ignition and pointed her car towards town. If she was already this much in love with the tiny life she carried now, she could hardly fathom how much more attached she’d become by the time she gave birth.
In the mean time, she had some supplies to start stocking up on. After all, there was no time like the present.
Later that night, after all of her friends had come over and helped her set up the nursery, celebrated over dinner and then left, Madeline stood in beside the beautiful white crib with purple and pink butterflies etched into the wood. She ran her hand lovingly over the top railing, smiling peacefully.
As she glanced at the butterfly bedding she’d picked out, Madeline could picture her daughter snuggled in, sleeping with her head resting on the tiny pillow she’d found, covered by the soft pink blanket; her itty-bitty hand curled loosely around the butterfly rattle that Madeline hadn’t been able to leave at the store when she’d seen it.
Tears of happiness filled her eyes and she settled her hand on her stomach, looking down at the flat expanse of skin. “I’m going to take good care of you, my Lillie Rose. I promise… There won’t be a thing you will ever want for.”
Taking
one last look at the room, Madeline smiled through her happy tears and turned to leave, shutting the light off and gently tugging the door closed behind her. The following week, when she had her one day off, she would paint the room… the top half pink with purple butterflies and the bottom purple with pink butterflies… and perhaps a few white lilies and red roses thrown in here and there, just because she could.
Not having to ask anyone else for their opinion on how to prepare for her daughter’s birth was fantastic. There would be no one to tell her that she was spoiling the child… no one to argue that the room was too girly when there was no scientific proof that she was in fact having a girl. Being a scientist, she knew that gut instinct was in no way considered reliable; but being a mommy to be, she knew that it was all she needed. There wasn’t a soul alive that could convince her that she was wrong. She knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she wasn’t.
A week later, Madeline stood back in the doorway beside Trina who’d happily leant her artistic talent to help paint the nursery. “We did good work,” she proudly announced.
“Yeah, we did,” Trina happily agreed. “That little tyke of yours is going to love it. It’s like being outside in the middle of nature.”
“That was the idea,” Madeline said, nodding her head, looking around the room in awe of just how well it had turned out. “What do you think about painting her name in the middle of that far wall in big purple letters?” she asked, looking at the large blank spot in question just over where the crib sat.
“Shouldn’t you wait until you’ve got confirmation that you’re having a girl? Undoing that sort of decision would be next to impossible without painting over the whole wall… As it is, if this turns out to be a boy, he’s going to feel awfully uncomfortable in this room once he gets older.”
“Oh, it’ll be fine. It’s not a boy,” Madeline assured her friend as she contemplated the placement for the lettering of her daughter’s name on the wall.
“What, they have tests now to determine the sex of the baby this early on in pregnancy? When did they develop that little gem, and why is this, the first I’ve heard of it?” Trina asked, looking at her friend with wide eyes.
“No, they haven’t developed any scientific tests… I just know. I can feel it. Call it a sixth sense… I know it doesn’t make a lick of sense for a woman who deals in scientific facts to believe in something as lame as a gut instinct, but there is something in me that is so sure of this, that I’d be willing to wager an entire year’s salary that I’m right… This baby is a girl.”
“You’re right… It doesn’t make any sense,” Trina said, shaking her head in disbelief. “You of all people, Maddie… You forget; I know you. You don’t believe anything unless you have scientific proof in front of your face. And sometimes, only if you have more than one opinion, telling you that the fact is indeed a true fact. But, hey… I’ve never been pregnant, so I’m going to have to take your word on it. Somehow, pregnancy has short circuited your brain,” she said, chuckling. “Listen, hon… as excited as I am for you, I have to get going. My husband will be home soon, and I need to get dinner on the table before he walks through the door. I’m still trying to convince him that the time has come for us to become parents… In order for that to happen, I have to butter him up first. I’m fixing his favorite tonight,” she said, grinning from ear to ear. “With any luck, our children can grow up together and be best buds.”
The two friends hugged and Madeline watched as Trina walked out the door. She sighed heavily and walked into her bedroom. It had been a long day and she knew she had to work the following morning. The sooner she got to sleep, the better. That was one thing she’d found about growing a baby… it was tiring work.
Chapter 5
Several hours had gone by and Madeline was sound asleep when a loud pounding sounded at her front door, followed by someone practically lying on the doorbell. She moaned, and squinted at the bedside alarm clock, waiting for her eyesight to come into focus.
“Eleven fifteen? Who in their right mind would be so insistently knocking on my door at this time of night? Especially in the middle of the week?” she asked as she climbed out of bed and slipped her feet into her fuzzy slippers. She ignored her robe, figuring it must be one of her friends and stumbled towards the front door, yawning widely, wondering what was so important to bring any of them to her door in the middle of the night.
Standing on her doorstep, looking huge and threatening was a tall muscular cowboy. He was wearing old worn out cowboy boots, tight skin hugging blue jeans, a leather belt with a large belt buckle and a tucked in red and blue plaid button up shirt. On his head, a black Stetson covered dark brown hair. His eyes were a bright blue with tiny little dark blue specks. Ridiculously long eyelashes framed his eyes, drawing hers to them almost against her will.
His nose looked as if it might have been broken a few times and his lips were thick and made her think of long slow kisses that would heat a woman’s blood with little to no effort.
When he spoke, his voice was deep with a slow drawl that told her that he was Texas born and raised. If it weren’t for the heat and anger behind his words, she would have wondered if he was actually one of her wildest dreams come to life.
“I’m looking for a Doctor by the name of Madeline Randal. I was told I could find her at this address.”
“Yes…” she said awkwardly, trying not to cringe at the way his eyes scraped hungrily over her small frame. With all of the daydreams she had entertained about having a hot fling with a cowboy over the years, she could only imagine that this man was used to women having those sorts of thoughts about him. He was eye candy, plain and simple. “I’m Madeline Randal… and you are?” she asked, ducking her body behind the door to try to hide it from his view to keep him from seeing the way her nipples had puckered in response to his open appraisal.
He pushed his way past her into her house and the small living room seemed to shrink as his big frame stepped into it. Sighing in resignation, Madeline closed the door and went into the room, sitting daintily on the couch to see what this unbelievably sexy cowboy could possibly want with her.
His footsteps were quick as he paced the room, looking around him at the tiny little house that if he wasn’t careful, his child or children may very well end up growing up in. Finally, he found his voice; impressed that it didn’t come out as shaky as he had expected it to.
“My name is Eric Schmidt. There was a huge mistake at the fertility clinic,” he informed her, running his massive hand over his head after removing his hat out of respect. “Make a long story short, they messed up… big time.”
Remembering the man she’d chosen as her child’s father, Madeline settled her hand over her stomach and sucked in a harsh breath. “There’s no mistake. I have paperwork that clearly states that I have sole rights where my child is concerned. I was assured that all donors sign away any and all parental rights before their deposit is made… The donor I chose wasn’t even supposed to know my name…”
“Under normal circumstances, that would be true… Had they implanted your eggs and your donor’s sperm. Sadly, that isn’t what happened. There was an accidental switch made, and you received my wife’s eggs… fertilized with my sperm.”
His words hung in the air and Madeline could hardly breathe past the panic that threatened to overwhelm her. Her hand shook as it rested on her belly and she fought back the bile that rose in her throat. “No… That isn’t possible,” she denied in a panicked whisper.
“Believe me, I wish you were right,” he said, facing away from her to stand looking out the window into the postcard sized back yard. “When she passed on, I was determined to allow her dream of our children being born, to die with her. Imagine my shock when I was notified that I’m going to be a father after all.”
“No!” she denied, in full fledged panic mode. “I’m this baby’s mother,” she insisted, hugging herself protecting the fragile life within. “Name your price,” she said desperately.
“You didn’t want to be a father… I don’t expect anything from you. Tell me what it’s going to cost me to convince you to turn around and walk away and leave me to raise my daughter in peace.”
“There isn’t enough money on the planet to make me walk away from my child,” he informed her; looking threatening and scary as he loomed largely over her. “I gave my wife my word when those eggs were fertilized that when and if they grew to be babies who were born, I would be a father to them, and that’s what I fully plan on doing. I don’t care who I have to run over to make that promise a reality.”
“Well, I’ve gone through great physical and financial stress to get to this point,” she told him shakily. “I have the paperwork that claims that I have sole rights over any child born from the procedure I underwent. I don’t have to put up with you or your threats,” she said bravely, hoping against hope that it was true. She needed to get this man out of her house so that she could call Georgia. Her husband was a lawyer and he would be able to advise Madeline better as to what her rights were, assuming what this man was telling her about the mix-up at the clinic was true.
He lifted a single eyebrow at her in disbelief. “What? Are you insane or just plain in denial?” he asked shaking his head. “I’m not going anywhere as long as you have my child inside of you,” he informed her boldly, making himself comfortable in the rocking chair that sat across from the couch. As he kicked his boots off, it became clear to Madeline that he wasn’t joking. This man intended to stay right there in her living room for the duration.
Baby Mine (Stubborn Texas Siblings Book 1) Page 3