As the night sky fell upon us, I wished for more time. I didn’t know how I could do it, how I could let her slip away from me. She knew that my attempts to ignore her in the past month were only to hide my true feelings. She knew now how much I wanted her. But, what she didn’t understand was that I needed her. I needed her to listen when I had a bad day, to hold me when I was upset and to accept me for everything that had happened in my past.
She didn’t know that as we sat in the lifeguard chair I held her close because I physically didn’t want to let her go. If I could have stayed here forever I would have.
A bar on the boardwalk had a band playing and the music filled the air with a beautiful sound.
Before I could stop myself. “Hope, I think this has been the best day of my life.” I said through her hair.
She turned around and looked at me. Her eyes glistened from the bright moon above. She slowly pressed her lips against mine and brushed her tongue against them. I opened my mouth greedily and accepted her tongue against mine. Hope brought her legs around and straddled mine. I slid my hands beneath her dress and stuck them inside the elastic of her panties on each cheek. As she kissed me deeper I squeezed, causing her to begin rocking against me.
I sucked the side of her chin and her ear lobe, finally licking down the side of her neck. Her hands reached up my shirt and began sliding them over my nipples.
As she kissed me she pulled away. My eyes opened and she leaned her forehead into mine. “Chance, I need to ask you something.” She whispered.
“Anything.” I looked directly into her eyes when I answered.
“Take me home and make love to me. Please, just make love to me Chance.”
I pulled her face into mine and kissed her deeply. Without another word I climbed down and waited for her. We grabbed our things and walked hand in hand to the bike.
She held me so tight on the way home that I thought she was trying to squeeze me to death. I welcome it though, in fact I didn’t want her to ever let go. I felt like just driving us far away, so that we never had to be apart again.
The ride home seemed like it took forever, but I knew it was because of her request. There was nothing more on this earth that I wanted to do more than make love to her. I wanted to kiss every inch of her body, to hold her in my arms, and to give her unending satisfaction until we collapsed into each other’s embrace.
I wanted to give her all of me, everything I could give her, and then even more.
Chapter 19
Hope
I had a hundred thousand words that I wanted to say to Chance. A hundred thousand reasons why I couldn’t bear to be without him, but for tonight I would have to settle for this.
Once we got home, we bypassed the main house all together. He never let go of my hand as he led me across the patio and into the pool house. When we got inside he grabbed me a bottle of water out of the kitchen and led me into his bedroom.
My bag dropped to the floor. Chance held my constant gaze as he took my hand and placed it on his shoulder. He started at my fingers and ran his hand all the way up my arm to my shoulder slowly, then all the way back down again. He leaned into my neck and opened his mouth to kiss me. I could feel his warm tongue sliding against my skin. He walked behind me and lightly drug his fingers from my shoulders down to my elbows and then back up to my shoulders again.
I had Goosebumps, but I didn’t want it to end.
He slid the strap of my dress to the side and kissed my shoulder. My head started to fall back when I felt his tongue there. As the second strap came down, I felt his lips on the opposite side. His lips found the center of my back right above where my dress sat. He kept his lips there while he slowly unzipped it. I could feel the dress loosening, but he didn’t let it fall. Instead, he reached around while kissing my shoulder again and lightly brushed the skin above my chest.
My breathing was becoming more rapid and each time he touched me, I could feel butterflies between my legs.
“How can I stand here in this room with you and not feel moved by you?” He whispered in my ear as he grabbed my top from the front and slowly pulled it down, brushing against my nipples as he did. He held the dress the entire time he slowly removed it from my body. His hands found my ankles and he slid them up until he cupped my backside. I could feel him kissing one side, before moving to my hips.
His hands slid up past my waist and just before he reached my breasts he turned me around. I opened my eyes to see him looking directly into mine.
His lips brushed over mine, but he didn’t stop to kiss me. Instead they fluttered against my own making me gasp. He buried his face into my hair and nudged his nose into it. I tried to reach for his shirt but he grabbed both of my hands and kissed the back of my knuckles before putting them back down to my sides.
He reached behind his head and pulled his shirt off. I licked my lips as I stared straight ahead at his perfect chest. He grabbed my waist and walked me backward until I was sitting on his bed. Chance moved in between my legs and pressed me down to lay on the bed with my feet still hanging off. He brought his lips to mine and held them there, and then once he pulled away he stood back up looking at me.
His eyes were filled with desire and the more I watched him, the more rapid my breathing became. I could see my chest moving up and down, as he just stood there taking me in. His hands made it to his shorts and he slowly unbuttoned them and let them fall. With one tug his boxers followed suit.
Chance leaned into me again, this time climbing on top of me. I scooted myself back on the bed until my head reached his pillows, the whole time never taking my eyes off of him. He lay his body beside mine and propped himself up with his elbow. He traced circles around one of my breasts, but never touched my nipple. I let out a soft moan as his hands mimicked that same pattern on the opposite breast.
He bit his bottom lip when he rolled his flat palm across one of my nipples. The friction causing it to instantly harden. I honestly did not know how much more I could take. I felt like at any moment I was going to explode, but Chance continued to savor every inch of my body.
I made a second attempt to reach out and touch him, but he gently stopped my hand and brushed it against his lips. He closed his eyes for a moment, and I could only assume it was to regain some composure considering how involved he had become. Chance shifted his weight and leaned over to brush his closed lips against my hardened nipple. I arched my body toward his mouth, because the sensation was becoming blissfully unbearable. Finally he opened his mouth and slid his fabulous tongue over where his lips had just been. The air from his heavy breathy hit the wetness and sent more tingling sensations down into the very core of my sexual desire. When he took my nipple into his mouth I began to shutter in ecstasy.
His mouth kissed my belly button, but continued to travel down to my thighs. I felt like a ticking bomb and I knew that he knew exactly what he was doing to me. He pushed one of my knees up and buried his mouth into one of my inner thighs. I could first feel his tongue and then small nibbles as his teeth brushed against my tender skin.
I was sure I knew what was about to happen, but instead he kissed my shaved skin right above that tender spot between my legs and used his tongue to lick up my abdomen until he reached the skin in the center of my breasts.
Chances lips finally made their way back to my face. I kissed him eagerly; stroking my tongue against his is a ravishing manner. His hand found one of my breasts and he massaged it as he continued to kiss me. I ran one of my legs over his ass, and finally wrapped them around his back, causing him to be positioned over top of me.
Chance pulled away from our kiss and looked me right in the eye. I noticed immediately that they were filled with tears. I reached up for his face wondering what could be wrong, but he just froze.
Chance
In all of my efforts to make Hopes request a reality, I had lost myself. Each touch, every kiss led to my heart breaking more and more. I couldn’t do this to her. She needed to know.
“Chance what’s wrong?” She asked.
“Hope, I don’t think I can do this.” I confessed.
Her eyes filled with tears. “Why? What did I do? Please just one more time Chance. Please don’t stop being with me tonight. I can’t ….”
I put my finger over her lip. “Shhh. I can’t just be with you tonight Hope. I don’t want to stop being with you at all. You are worth the risk. I don’t care if we have to sneak around for five months. I will do anything it takes; just tell me you feel the same. Tell me I am not imagining this thing between us is so much more than either of us has ever experienced?”
Hope began to sob. I pulled her into my arms and rolled us over so that she was now on top of me. I kissed the top of her head. “Hope are you okay?”
“You aren’t imagining it Chance. I feel it too.” She announced as the tears fell down her cheeks.
I took her face into my hands and used my thumbs to wipe away tears on each cheek. “We will figure this out baby, I promise.” I looked her directly in the eyes when I said it.
Hope pressed her lips against mine and started to run her hands down my stomach. I grabbed both of her hands and flipped her on her back. I set both of her hands above her head and held them there with one of my hands while the other one traced a nipple. Her eyes watched as I slowly took it into my mouth and drug my teeth against it. She licked her lips and let out a gasp. I slide my hands down between her legs and knew instantly how ready she was for me. I wanted to taste her, but she had other plans. “Please Chance; I just want you inside of me.”
I positioned myself on top of her and slid right inside. She arched her back and I made slow thrusts deep into her. Her legs locked with mine and her body rocked in sync with me. She was so wet for me and I couldn’t stop myself from being completely turned on from it.
“Does it feel good baby?” I said with my lips against hers.
“Don’t stop.” She answered.
I felt her nails digging at my back and I began to explode from the rush of excitement it gave me. Hope’s insides started to tighten around me and I knew it was happening for her as well. I continued moving, not wanting her to miss out on her own release. When she finally collapsed, I fell on top of her, trying to catch my breath.
I kissed her forehead and buried my face into her neck.
We eventually switched positions so that her weight was on me. As she drifted to sleep I tickled her back with my fingers, every once in a while kissing her head.
Hope’s breathing became slower and when I was sure she was asleep, I finally let my eyes close. I wished that we could have stayed awake all night, but we both were exhausted. I found myself wondering if my lovemaking was good enough for her. I had never been asked to do that, and everything I had done just now was out of raw emotion.
Before I finally let myself fall into sleep, I kissed her one more time. “I love you,” I confessed, knowing she didn’t hear me.
It was the first time I had ever said those words and really meant them. I thought I had meant them in the past, but after feeling what Hope did to me, I knew it had been something else all together.
I didn’t know how we were going to make it work. Hell, I didn’t even know if it was possible. I just knew that I couldn’t be away from her. Even if we had to meet away from the house once a week, I would do it.
I wanted her to know how I felt, and I finally decided that I would tell her tomorrow and confess how I had fallen in love with her. If she still accepted me and wanted me after she knew my past, then I would tell her my true feelings.
I was so nervous, even afraid that she would be sickened by me or leave me like everyone else had. I didn’t want that to happen. God, I didn’t know what I would do if she looked at me the way all of my ex-friends had. She had to be told though. She had to understand why her father didn’t want us together. She needed to hear the truth from me, not my sister or even her father.
I felt a tear falling down my cheek. I prayed this wasn’t going to be the last time I got to hold her in my arms. Losing her would be the final nail in my casket. I just knew it.
I squeezed her tighter against me and finally let myself sleep, knowing for right now she was right where she wanted to be.
Chapter 20
Hope
Chance woke me up with gentle kisses all over my face. I opened my eyes to his smiling face, but immediately started to panic about my father coming home and catching us.
“It is still early baby. Don’t get all worried. I figured we could get you up and over to the main house and hang out there until they arrive home. We will hear the car and I can run into the kitchen or something.”
I smiled and wrapped my arms around him. “So this isn’t just a dream?”
“What do you mean?”
“You still want to be with me even though we have to sneak around?”
He moved a piece of hair away from my face. “Hope, I would do anything to be with you. It would kill me inside if I didn’t at least try to make this work.”
I couldn’t help but let out a faint laugh. I was more than excited to hear him say those words to me. It was all that I had wanted for so long now.
“Why don’t u grab some clothes and get dressed. When you are done we can walk over.” He suggested.
I jumped up and started running around the room for my clothes. Chance pulled a clean shirt out of a basket and tossed it my way. It was just a plain white t-shirt so nobody would even know the difference where I had gotten it. Now if I would have walked in the house wearing a Penn State shirt, well that would have been harder to explain.
My dad wasn’t back yet anyway. With the time it took them to drive back from the secluded cabin, it would at least be around eleven before they walked in the door.
Chance was waiting out by the pool when I walked outside. He glanced over and gave me one of his famous smiles before I reached his side. We entered into the back of the house and just as we had thought, there wasn’t anyone home. While Chance made his way toward the living room, I ran my bag of stuff upstairs and changed my clothes. When I came back downstairs Chance had a serious look on his face.
I froze in place and started to panic. The color had left his cheeks and his smile had disappeared. “Sit down Hope. Before we can move any further with whatever this is, you need to know the truth about my past. After I explain everything, I will let you decide if we have a future.” He paused for a second before grabbing my hand and pulling me down to sit beside him. “I just need you to promise me that you will listen to everything before judging me.”
I shook my head up and down and let out a big fat “yes”.
Chance looked down to his hands. He was rubbing them on his knees like he was having trouble talking to me. I leaned in to him. “Whatever it is, you can tell me Chance.”
He looked over in my direction and began.
“I don’t know if you were aware of it, but I actually went to Penn State on a Scholarship. I got in with both academics and baseball. I had always attended public school and couldn’t believe when the recruiters contacted me.”
I grabbed his hand and played with it as he continued.
“I had never been away from home before and the first semester was really an adjustment for me. For the first few weeks I threw myself into my classes and stayed in my room, but as the weeks went on I started making friends. My first friend I made was a girl named Christian. She was quiet like me and our professor thought we would make good study partners.”
He looked up at me.
“We started spending a lot of extra time together, even when we weren’t studying. I promise you that it was completely plutonic. We were just friends that enjoyed hanging out. That is all it was, especially for me.”
He grabbed a bottle of water off the table and took a drink. “When I met my now ex, Veronica, our friendship started to taper off. My ex was jealous of me being friends with another girl and I was tired of having to make excuses to Christian, instead of
telling her it wasn’t my idea to stop hanging out.”
“Sophomore year started and my relationship became more serious, but the whole time Christian reached out and tried to remain friends. Every time I would say no, she would come back with another invite.”
Chance sat back against the couch and stared at the television as he kept explaining.
“My ex was a selfish bitch. Looking back I realize that we were never in a real relationship. She just wanted someone to dress, order around and be at her beck and call. So winter break was fast approaching and I buckled down to study for my exams, while the girlfriend went to her families place in the Hamptons to drink and party it up with her richy friends.”
He put his hands through his hair and then rubbed his knees again. “We got into this huge fight because I wouldn’t go with her, and she actually told me that if I didn’t go with her we were over, but I knew I couldn’t go. I had to obtain a certain grade point average to keep my scholarship. I had to stay there and study. So, in a group of text messages she brutally dumped me.”
“I took the news hard and ended up leaving the library and going to party. Christian spotted me immediately and we began heavily drinking. This creep kept following her around, so she begged me to pretend we were a couple. I was comfortable around her and the alcohol made us seem like we were more than friends. Soon, the room started to spin and we headed outside for some air.”
“Christian proceeded to throw herself at me on the porch of the frat house. I wasn’t expecting it and she caught my arm with her nose, causing it to start bleeding everywhere. I felt so horrible about the whole thing that I insisted she come up to my room and get cleaned up. I swear to you Hope, I meant nothing else by it, but I had had a lot to drink and my body and my mind weren’t in the same place. We walked up to my room holding hands and laughing. She was pinching her nose as the blood continued to pour out.”
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