“Sorry,” she said.
“No need, that was good.”
She’d hand fed him. He’d known from the first minutes of the grape licorice experience that being hand fed by her would be exquisite. It was better. He licked his fingers and wiped powdered sugar from his face from the cannoli explosion.
“Here, you missed some,” she said and wiped her thumb against the corner of his mouth. He caught her hand in his at the wrist, wanting to lick the sugar from her finger.
Realizing he startled her, he let go. She went back to eating her half, having none of the troubles he’d just experienced.
“Hey, so I was thinking today and realized I know very little about you. Other than the basics like your favorite pizza place and the fact you don’t like my band.” She tried to chew her bite quickly like she wanted to refute his teasing but he didn’t want her rushing and her mouth was full. “Just teasing you. Slow down, enjoy your dessert.” It looked so good on her. He’d wait until she was done to repay the favor and wipe her powdered sugar away. Or better yet, what he really wanted to do and lick it off.
Fuck, he’d done so good all night not to go there. Now he was there. Stefan guessed there was no avoiding the way he wanted her. But after Will’s chat, there were still other things he found he really did want to learn about Dani.
“Like I said, I think we need to even up the playing field. You’ve read that magazine interview about me. So now it’s my turn to ask some burning questions.”
“Oh gosh,” she said between bites and sips of water. “Really?” Her face scrunched up.
“Yep. Okay, so I’ll go easy on you at first.” She probably thought he was about to ask what her favorite sexual position was but he’d thought about these on the drive over and intended to get to know her better because yeah, he liked this girl a lot. Of course he’d do a little teasing too since she always smiled whenever he did that. “I guess I’m curious to know what you’d be doing if you weren’t taking care of my mom.” Never had cared to know that about anyone else but he’d spent hours wondering that this past week watching her work.
“Oh, that’s not what I was expecting…” She trailed off.
“I want to get to know you, Dani,” he said from that place he was still getting used to talking from. It beat hard, waiting to hear all about her.
“Well, I’d be doing the same thing, just in another home or a clinic somewhere.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, don’t sound so shocked, but I was going to school to be a nurse when my mom got sick.” She kept a straight face but the pain of losing her mom had to be fresh still.
“Did you graduate?” His hands wanted to touch hers while she talked but he grabbed the glass of water the waiter had brought instead. He was being good and touching her right now would be a distraction. What she had to say was important to him.
“No. Taking care of my mom made it hard.”
“Can I ask what she had? My mom let me know when she passed. I’m sorry I don’t know more than that.”
“It’s okay. She battled cancer for a good few years but the last year it just took over and it was tough.”
“God Dani, I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”
“It was tough seeing her body go through everything it did but I think the reason she lived a year longer than any of her doctors predicted was because she stayed positive until the end.”
He could see that she got some of that from her mom. But he’d gotten a two week glimpse of his own mom’s fight against cancer and Dani had done it for two years straight. And now she was doing it with his mom, although not exactly at that same level. Fuck, he prayed his mom didn’t get sick again. That she’d battled her battles and now would live the rest of her life as healthy as possible. He wanted to give her the best of everything.
“So you didn’t go back to school after?”
“No, I thought about it but then Mrs. C asked me to move in and…”
“And what? Come on, it’s me.”
“Well, working as her caregiver allows me to do what I love which is help people and, it pays well.” She shook her head at that like she couldn’t believe she’d just said it out loud.
“Come on, you know you want to laugh with me right now. You brought that up all on your own. I never would have gone there.” He held his hands up in innocence and yes, after a second and her blushing that turned him on, they laughed together.
It was an amazing feeling. He gave up on not touching her and snuck her hand into his. She told him about Daisy leaving home at eighteen to go be one of the girls and how happy she was about it. Dani’s plans to return to nursing school someday made him happiest. She was awesome at it and owed it to herself to get her license. He thought several times about gaging how she’d feel about working in the state of Tennessee but didn’t mention it out loud. But she’d be a sure hire at the children’s hospital in Nashville. Sin Pointe had already played at a couple benefits for them and he could see Dani really making an impact there. When he asked her to move, he wanted options. That was one thing he’d learned about women. They liked those.
He’d be leaving the waiter a giant tip for letting them stay at their table so long. He checked his watch and two hours had passed since they’d been seated.
“So would you say you’re more scared or excited to be a mom in, how long until you’re due?” he asked, curious after the fresh view of her little swollen belly.
“Five more months to go and I think the word you’re looking for is terrified.”
They both laughed. “I can’t even imagine. I mean, you’ve got a person growing in there.”
“You’re not helping soothe that whole terror I just mentioned.”
He chuckled. “Sorry, it’s just so cool and weird.”
“It is very weird. But it’s been happening since the beginning of time so I’m thinking I’m gonna survive. We’ll see.”
“You’re gonna be a great mom, Dani.”
“Have you ever thought about having kids?”
Okay, that was not on the list of things he’d thought to talk about tonight. But shit, he wasn’t gonna shy away now. “I almost did, sweetheart. Back in high school.” Stefan looked around the restaurant, apparently he still did that whenever he was about to speak about Amanda and her family in public. The Coopers could still live in Moonlight.
“Really? Can you tell me about it?” Her features rose like she wasn’t sure if it was okay to ask him that.
He didn’t want to talk about it, but he would. Nothing should be off limits if they were going to try dating. “Got my fourteen year old girlfriend pregnant when I was sixteen.”
“Oh shit.”
“Yeah, big oh shit. But I was ready to quit school and get a full time job to support her and the baby.”
“Gosh, at sixteen. You were just a baby yourself. What happened?”
“Unfortunately, I’ll never know for sure. I think Amanda was scared and told her parents that I was refusing to help her.”
“Stefan, did she have an abortion?”
“I don’t think so. She told me she lost it. That’s about when her parents called mine and let them know what a horrible son they had raised.”
“Why did they say that? That’s just cruel. It takes two.”
“Some sixteen year old kid gets their daughter pregnant. She’s crying all the time, stressed out. They obviously believed I’d said I was having nothing to do with it and all that stress I’d caused made her lose it. I don’t blame them. If I had a daughter, I’d be pissed too.”
“What did your parents think?”
“What any mother would think getting a call like that. That all the hard work she’d put in raising her son the right way had been for nothing. Unfortunately, that was around the same time my dad left. I have no idea how my mom got through that year.”
“Stefan…”
“Hey, it is what it is. And uh, I’m glad you brought it up. There’s something I should have told you the
first day I got here.” Apparently he was going with dropping the Nashville bomb on her first and if she took that well enough, he’d ask her to go out with him.
“Okay…”
“Dani, I want to be the son my mom has deserved these last twenty years that I’ve been gone from her life. Not just want, I have to do better. The truth is I don’t know how much longer she’ll be around.” He’d taken a minute on the long drive from Nashville to think about moms. Out of all his close friends, only he and Marion still had theirs. Trista, Lily, Jaxon, Lucky, all had lost their mothers.
“That’s a good thing, Stefan, and this visit means so much to your mom. I can tell you two still have some stuff to iron out, but I’m not lying when I say Gina has been so much more at peace this week you’ve been here.”
“Well, the only way I can see making that happen is by moving her to Nashville with me. Sweetheart, I’m going to ask her before I leave. I know I should have told you that before but I’m telling you now.”
Her fingers settled on top of the table and her eyebrows stayed hiked. “Wow, that, that is a surprise. Wh—when did you decide that?”
Her stuttering worried him. “Once I got here and saw her for myself but I’ve been thinking about it ever since the plans for the next tour started coming together. I don’t know how many more of these tours we’re gonna do. That stuff will always take me away but with Mom living at home with me, I’ll see her so much more. I’ll be able to do so much more for her. It’s not just about sending her money anymore for me, Dani.”
He had no idea how she was going to respond. She sat there with her mouth caught like she was about to say something. “Um, of course. No, that’s exactly what you should do,” she said sounding like she wanted to mean it.
“It’s one of the reasons I wanted you to come to dinner tonight. I needed you to know my plans because they will affect you too.”
She still didn’t look like she knew what to say. There would be a hole in the maroon table cloth if she kept rubbing at it like that.
“Sweetheart, dinner wasn’t just about me telling you about my plans for Mom.”
“No?”
It wasn’t much but at least she’d said something.
“No. It’s why I asked you here tonight. I had to tell you so you could make arrangements to…”
Dani grabbed her side pocket like it was on her last nerve. The way she whipped it out and looked at the screen this time instead of just ignoring the loud buzz stopped him. Several blinks later, she pushed up from the table.
“I’m, I’m sorry. Let me go see what this is about. I’ll be back.”
Shit. That wasn’t good. Was she bolting on him again? But no, he told himself she was just going to the bathroom. She was pregnant after all.
Dani excused herself to the bathroom, and watching her walk away so determined brought his body to life again. He’d just learned that he could push those feelings to the back of his mind rather than let them own his every action and thought around her. Not saying it was easy. But he could do it.
Stefan used her bathroom phone break to text Will and check on his mom.
Stefan: Everything okay at the house?
It took a couple seconds but Will texted back.
Will: Mom says I make the best mac n cheese. How’s dinner going?
Stefan: Good. Thinking about asking her.
Will: Girlfriend or Nashville?
Stefan: Getting there. Both. Fuck. Not my area of expertise.
Will: Stop thinking. Just ask.
Stefan: Go check on Mom. I gotta go.
He sat there waiting, looking around the small dining area. The last time he’d been here had been ages ago. He looked for the jukebox by the entrance but found it had been moved back near the bathrooms. Stefan went to check it out and was shocked to see a Sin Pointe song, albeit one from the nineties, but still. Did he pop a quarter in and grace the staff and the one other couple dining with “Play?” What the hell? This one’s for you, Moonlight, he thought and pushed down hard on the play button. He loved those knobby old ancient buttons.
Classic Sin Pointe made him smile. He loved this one.
“I’ve got you how I need you. Don’t cry, don’t hide. I just want to play with your emotions for the night.”
How many times had he sung that to the crowds? Stefan let the verses play on their own here in the restaurant but chimed in for the chorus. Jaxon had a special way with words, that was for sure. It had been Stefan’s honor to sing his friend’s songs the past two decades. Back when this one had come out, he’d felt like Jaxon had written the songs with both of them in mind. But the latest lyrics of his Aussie mate’s seemed way more directed at Stefan. Jaxon of course denied it.
Stefan closed his eyes and blocked out the next song that auto-played on the juke box.
Silently while he waited for Dani to come back out, Stefan hummed his favorite new Sin Pointe song, one they’d recorded just a couple months back and would soon be singing to the masses, in his head.
“You kiss me like a stranger, but you hurt me like a friend. Every time I look at you, I’m lost back at the end. You ask me not to change too much, but I’ve hurt so many in this skin. This skin that you love to touch. You love this skin, I need your touch.”
Damn. It was good and the reason they hadn’t decided to hang it up yet. The deal was always as long as the songs kept coming to Jaxon, they’d keep at it. Apparently love had only unleashed more of Jaxon’s brilliance. Fire burned in his chest when he thought of singing Touch for Dani. It fit. If she stayed with him tonight, he would sing it just for her.
A flash of orange and navy blue stripes came slowly out of the women’s restroom and stopped in the doorway when she saw him. Stefan knew in that moment that it was time to ask her to consider moving to Nashville and being his girlfriend. He noticed Dani’s hair was neater, no more flyaways around her hairline and the waves in her long black ponytail were smoothed and shiny liked she’d wet her whole head. Maybe that’s what had taken her so long. He left the juke box to meet up with her and hold hands back to their table but her palms were damp and clammy. When she looked up at him, he knew something had happened in the bathroom and it pissed him off not knowing what. She inched back inside and tried to close the door before he made it in. Good thing he was a hundred times physically stronger than her.
****
Never in a million years had she thought the constant phone alerts were from Thom. She’d assumed Daisy. Dani had splashed so much water onto her face after listening to his voicemail that she’d had to take down her hair and finger comb all the shorter wet strands stuck to her forehead. He’d found a way to call her and she’d ignored him. Before she had a chance to organize another thought, Stefan was only inches away.
Thom’s voicemail had left her shaken. But now Stefan was holding her clammy hands and pushing her back into the ladies’ room.
“What are you doing?” she asked, frazzled at having heard Thom’s voice and now seeing Stefan’s intensity flare in those deep, dark eyes.
“I didn’t get to finish at the table. We’re alone in here. So let me finish now.”
“Well, yes we’re alone but that’s beside the point.” She watched him lock the door behind them.
“Unlock that.” Yes she was on the defensive. No she didn’t want him to spell the rest out here in private. He was about to tell her that she was being affected by his decision and would need to find a new job. A new place to live.
“No. Not until you hear the rest of what I was gonna say.”
Her brain hurt.
“No need. You brought me here tonight to let me know I need to find a new job. It’s my fault for yet again being so stupid as to hope…” She shut her hand over her mouth.
“Spit it out. Hope what?” His brows formed into stiff arches.
“No. Nothing.” The room felt like it was spinning. Thom’s voice telling her he was sorry. He was stunned. He didn’t know what to say. But that he would help
her anyway he could. And that they would figure everything out when he came home in two months on his mid-tour leave. Like any of that was what she’d wanted from him. No, she only wanted him to know he would be a father.
“You hoped what, Dani?”
“I don’t know,” her voice sounded hollow echoing back in her ears as she tried to be in the room with Stefan who she could feel was being affected by her shock.
“Well I’ll say it then because I was about to get to this before you bolted on me again.”
“Don’t play with me, Stefan. I support you wanting to be with your mom. Maybe, maybe you should just take me back to my sister’s.”
“With you acting like this, I should take you back there.” She tried for the door but he stood in front of it blocking her. “But not yet.”
“I can’t do this. Please just let me out. I can’t think straight.”
Stefan’s hands cupped each side of her face and she wanted to fight out of his grasp but he was too strong and he wasn’t relenting.
“I don’t know what just got into you but you will listen to me, Dani. Stop fighting me.”
She hadn’t realized she’d been fighting him so hard and relaxed her muscles if for no other reason than for her baby. Her heart hammered and she felt like she’d been tipped upside down and shaken. Her world was again spinning the wrong way. Now she was losing her job, her home and the closest thing she had to a mom but getting her baby’s father back. “Why didn’t you just call and tell me over the phone?” A crack splintered her heart. She was losing Stefan. Really losing him and all ties that would have brought him back to Moonlight every now and then to visit her.
****
“Because, you stubborn woman. You’re totally wrong about what I’m about to say. If I wasn’t so…” But the bewildered look on her face stopped him short of telling her he was hung up on her and that was the only reason he was in there fighting her in the fucking bathroom. Shit.
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