But despite all she had learned, Sloane felt one overriding emotion. As Esther looked at her with her concerned green eyes, Sloane missed her mother intensely. She felt the burden of what Eva had gone through over the course of a thousand years pushing down on her, marking her chest tight and her heart ache.
She felt guilty that there was nothing she could have done to save her mother, and shame because she had never taken steps to avenge her murder. Not yet, anyway.
‘I need some air,’ Sloane said, walking around the table and leaving the room before anyone could stop her.
Her pace quickened with every step that she took until she was running as fast as her legs would carry her. She raced through corridor after corridor until she reached the front doors of the castellum. She burst through them and ran down the steps, not hesitating as she started across the courtyard and made her way beyond the wall.
It was only when she reached the open plain beyond that she stopped. Sloane collapsed down to her knees and sunk her hands into the snow, ignoring the chill of the ice against her skin.
All she could hear were her heaving breaths in and out. Her gasps were born from distress rather than exertion, and she struggled to catch her breath for many minutes as she stared at the snow.
Eventually, her breathing started to ease, and she looked up at the endless blue sky. She didn’t know how to process all the things that Esther had said. She believed them, but she didn’t know how to accept them. She felt like the firm foundations of her life were crumbling beneath her and she knew she could no longer trust her own past. So much of Esther’s story made sense, but she still felt like there was so much more that she was missing.
She wanted to know more about her mother. Eva had spent almost a thousand years on Earth before Sloane was born. She wondered how her mother had come to be the wonderful woman she remembered, and how she and Esther had stayed hidden for such a long time.
She felt like Esther had only just scratched the surface of their family’s past. But Sloane knew she didn’t have time to focus on her mother. Her father had found his way to the Liftsal, after a lifetime of searching for it, and she dreaded to think what he was planning next.
‘Can I join you?’ a voice asked from behind her.
She glanced over as Rhyn took several cautious steps towards her. She’d been so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn’t even heard the tread of his footsteps as he approached. Sloane slowly nodded, before turning to stare at the snow in front of her again.
Rhyn lowered himself to the ground beside her. He sat only a hairsbreadth away from her, but he didn’t touch her, and he didn’t say a word. He just sat there and stared out at the barren world before them. It was precisely what Sloane needed. She didn’t want to exchange words with him, and she didn’t want to talk about everything that had happened. For a moment she just wanted to breathe. And that’s what Rhyn let her do.
Sloane had no idea how long she sat there for, but eventually, she started to notice the air growing colder around her. She looked up and saw that the two suns were beginning to dip towards opposite ends of the horizon.
Her thoughts had wandered while she sat in the snow, floating through her mind like clouds drifting across the sky. She couldn’t grasp on to them, and she let them fade from her attention. As her troubles dispersed, she relished in the stillness in her mind. She had wanted the safe oblivion of nothing for a moment, and she had been granted the reprieve if only for a short while.
‘How long have we been here?’ she asked, her voice more of a croak than she expected.
‘A while,’ was all Rhyn said.
She turned to look at him. His ice blue eyes were filled with concern, and his expression was more solemn than usual. Even for him. He didn’t seem cold from sitting out in the snow, and he didn’t seem agitated despite their prolonged silence. Sloane had barely noticed the temperature herself, even though her pants were covered in snow.
‘We should go back before it gets dark,’ he said.
Sloane glanced over her shoulder towards the castellum. The icy walls rose up high behind them and were beginning to softly glow in the evening light. The castle looked inviting, but she didn’t want to return just yet. She didn’t want to deal with all the confusing thoughts that hovered at the edge of her mind, and she knew that once she returned to the castellum, she would be faced with the reality of her past once again.
‘I don’t want to go back,’ she murmured, turning to look into his eyes. They were still sat so close to one another, and she had to bend her head back a little to look at him. ‘I’m not ready to face them again. Not yet.’
Rhyn nodded, a flicker of understanding passing through his eyes. ‘Do you want to stay in the village tonight?’ he asked. ‘I know you haven’t been down there in a while. The solitude might do you some good.’
Sloane pursed her lips slightly as she considered Rhyn’s offer. He was right. It had been a long time since she had stayed in the village, and thinking about it brought a warm feeling to her belly that hadn’t been there a moment ago. It felt like she was being offered the chance to return home, and she couldn’t deny how much she liked the idea.
She smiled up at him and nodded. ‘I think I’d like that,’ she said.
He grinned down at her in response and rose to his feet, holding his hands out to help her up. She took hold of them, enjoying the rough feel of his calloused grip on her own as he pulled her up. A small part of her didn’t want him to let go, but she dropped her hands from Rhyn’s as soon as she was upright and started walking towards the steps that would lead them down to the village.
The two of them were silent as they walked across the plateau. Though the air was chilly, there was surprisingly little wind and the world was still. The skies were slowly turning pink as the suns began to disappear behind the mountain peaks in the distance, and the lone moon above was growing brighter. Sloane tried to focus on the beautiful world around her rather than the troubling thoughts plaguing her mind.
It was growing dark by the time they reached the steps, but Sloane no longer struggled to see them as she might have done before she drank the Liftsal. Even so, she allowed Rhyn to take the lead and slowly trailed down behind him.
Her stomach was usually tense when she moved up and down the treacherous steps. Hidden sections of ice used to frequently cause her feet to slip beneath her, but tonight she could see them so clearly that she wondered how she ever could have missed them before.
Everything looked so different to her now that she’d drunk the Liftsal. The world was more vivid, and even the stars that were starting to glisten in the sky seemed brighter. She could have sat on the steps and stared at them all night, appreciating the way they twinkled as if they were tiny specks of magic that flickered in the night’s sky.
When they reached the bottom of the steps, Rhyn paused and turned to face her. His expression was troubled, and she sensed it was because of everything Esther had told them before. She had been trying to escape those thoughts ever since she left the castellum, but in her silence Rhyn was probably thinking of little else.
She could tell he wanted to bring it up, and she felt surprisingly vulnerable as she waited for him to begin. She didn’t even know what to think about the messy family history that had been revealed, let alone how to answer any questions on it. She wondered if Rhyn could sense how defenceless she was feeling.
‘I know you probably don’t want to talk about the things Esther said just yet,’ he started, his voice deep and surprisingly soft. ‘It was a lot to take in, and I know it will take you a while to wrap your head around everything. I just want to ask one thing…’
Sloane held her breath as she waited for Rhyn to continue.
‘Do you believe it was true?’
The breath left Sloane in a rush of relief as she nodded. That question, at least, was easy. ‘Yes, I believe her,’ Sloane replied.
It wasn’t just the locket that had her convinced or the look on Lorian’s fa
ce as he confirmed they shared his daughter’s eyes. There was a feeling deep in Sloane’s gut that told her everything Esther had said was real. The foreign world of the Unfaih had felt like more of a home to Sloane than any other place she had been in her life. Esther’s confirmation that she was descended from the Unfaih had only intensified that sense of belonging.
Rhyn nodded and let out a breath of his own. ‘Okay,’ he said, rubbing a hand over his tired face. ‘Okay.’
She waited for him to push her for more answers, but instead, he turned and continued along the narrow pathway that cut across the face of the cliff and headed towards the Unfaih village.
Sloane paused for a second, surprised. She had prepared herself to answer a difficult question, one that would have forced her to open up to him emotionally. Instead, his question seemed to release a bit of the tension in her chest. There were many parts of the story Esther had told that were difficult for Sloane, but only one that was easy—believing her.
Sloane felt a sudden wave of gratitude because Rhyn’s question had done something that she had not been able to do. It had given her something to hold on to and something to feel sure of. And when she went to sleep that night, she knew she’d still be certain about that one thing. There was truth in what Esther had said, and she could figure the rest out tomorrow.
She started to slowly trail after Rhyn again, a small sense of peace settling within her as she walked. When she reached the edge of the village, she stopped in her tracks to look at the quaint place she’d begun to consider home. Thin trails of smoke could be seen emanating from the cabins that were dotted throughout the village, and moonlight reflected brightly off the icy structures that marked the centre of the town.
Rhyn was several steps ahead of her, and he looked over his shoulder when he noticed she wasn’t following. She merely smiled and started after him again.
Rhyn’s cabin was dark when they reached it, and the two glacies that guarded the front of it were both sleeping on the job. The swan-like creatures didn’t move as they approached, and Sloane could have sworn she heard something akin to a snore blowing out of one of their beaks.
Sloane hovered just inside the doorway as Rhyn set about starting a fire. Neither one of them needed the warmth, but the inside of the cabin was almost pitch-black without one. She watched him as he worked, unable to draw her eyes away.
She felt like he kept surprising her. She kept thinking she knew exactly who he was, only to find another kernel of his personality hiding within his gruff exterior. He was far kinder than she ever could have guessed and was more patient than she could ever hope to be. He had an outer strength she thirsted for and an inner strength that was more beautiful than his perfect body. It was often hard for her to believe he was even real, as though he was a figment of her imagination or something she had dreamed up.
She didn’t want to think about the shocking bombardment of exposed secrets and lies she’d endured earlier. She didn’t want to worry about the human settlement or the threat the Brakys posed. For one night, Sloane wanted to push those things from her mind and just be herself.
Watching Rhyn, she wished that their lives were simpler and that they weren’t caught up in the danger and confusion that their two worlds clashing had provoked. Ever since she had drunk the Liftsal, Sloane had been so cautious around him. She had kept her distance because she had no idea what her future held. But her fate suddenly didn’t feel so uncertain.
When Esther confirmed that she was definitely part Unfaih, Sloane began to feel a flicker of hope. A small part of her was starting to accept that perhaps her future didn’t end in shadows and torment. Maybe there was a chance she’d live to help Rhyn defeat the Brakys. Maybe her life with him would extend far beyond that. The thought lit a spark within her that was impossible to extinguish.
Until now, she hadn’t dared to imagine a future with Rhyn. But images of a life with the Unfaih prince were now starting to flow unbidden through her mind. He ignited something within her that she’d never felt before and she could feel her attraction to him humming beneath her skin. It felt like something wild and alive was pulsing within her, and she desperately tried to rein it in.
Noticing Sloane’s gaze, Rhyn glanced up. The fire was now burning brightly, and the soft, warm light highlighted his face. His expression was curious at first, but the look changed in the blink of an eye. He was staring at her so intensely that she wondered if he sensed the tumultuous feelings that were swirling inside of her. She suddenly realised how very alone they were in his cabin, and the thought both excited and scared her.
Rhyn stood very slowly and walked over to her with silent steps. He didn’t move his eyes from hers as he came closer. His penetrating gaze seared into Sloane’s, almost taking the breath from her lungs.
It was like Rhyn could read her every thought and knew the way he was making her feel. Each step Rhyn took made her heart beat a little faster and made the buzz beneath her skin a little stronger.
The feelings she had for him were so overwhelming now, she felt like they were going to burst from her chest. The fire that burned in Rhyn’s eyes as he approached showed Sloane that he was feeling something similar.
Sloane had denied the strength of her feelings for Rhyn for a long time. She’d locked them up inside of herself, building high walls around her heart to try and protect it. But cracks had slowly been appearing, and now that she was acknowledging her desires, Sloane felt her defences fracturing completely. It was like a dam had burst within her, and now her feelings were rushing out in one unstoppable wave, smashing away the small shards of any barrier that had remained to shield her.
Rhyn stopped in front of her, far closer than he would normally stand, and she reached her head back to look at him. His eyes were burning with desire as they searched the depths of her own. It was like he was searching them for the answers to a question she hadn’t asked. She wondered if he had found what he was looking for because he continued watching her, waiting for her to move or speak.
Neither one of them were touching, and Sloane’s attempts to keep herself from closing the small distance between them felt like some form of torture. She was frozen to the spot. She didn’t know how to step towards him, but she also didn’t want to keep moving away. She’d been running from whatever was between them for so long, she didn’t know how to turn and run towards it. She’d always been brave, but she wasn’t sure if she had this kind of courage within her.
As if he sensed her confusion, a small crease formed at Rhyn’s brow and the desire in his eyes started to dampen. ‘I should leave you to rest,’ he said.
His words made Sloane feel like she’d just been doused in freezing cold water. His eyes still searched hers, and she wondered how he wanted her to respond. Did he want to leave her or was he asking if he could stay? She hesitated to answer him, but as he looked away and took a step to move past her, Sloane’s mind was made up in an instant.
She reached out a hand to grasp his wrist, stopping him. Rhyn’s eyes flicked downwards to look at her fingers as they wrapped around his arm. Her pulse was pounding with both nerves and excitement, and she could feel his skin tensing as she gripped him tightly.
She ever so slowly released his wrist and trailed her fingertips up his bare arms. Rhyn could have been a statue. He didn’t move, and he didn’t breath as she slowly traced a line up past his elbows and over his defined biceps. He only watched her fingers, not moving a muscle to stop them as they continued lightly across his skin.
Sloane rose up on her tiptoes and shifted her hands to brace herself against Rhyn’s firm chest. His eyes lifted to meet hers as she brought her face in close to his. She could feel his breath against her lips and sensed her nerves as they thudded through her body. She wouldn’t keep running. She was done being afraid.
‘I don’t want you to leave,’ she said, barely louder than a whisper. ‘And I don’t want to rest.’
A heartbeat passed, and then another followed before Rhyn slowly sta
rted to nod. ‘I don’t want that either,’ he replied before he crashed his lips against Sloane’s in a fiery and passionate kiss.
They had kissed before, but those previous embraces were nothing like the one they now shared. Heat and electricity sizzled between them, and Sloane welcomed the crackling charge as it rushed through her.
His lips were hungry against hers, and the intensity of his kiss lit up every cell of her being. Her body felt alive in a way it had never felt before, and every part of her wanted more of him. She clutched the material at his chest harder. His hands seared their mark on her skin as they slid down over her waist. Their every movement sent a new wave of sensations over Sloane, and she never wanted to come up for air.
When they finally pulled apart they were both breathless, and Sloane stared into Rhyn’s eyes with wonder, as if she saw something she’d never seen before. She was looking at him like he was everything she had never known she wanted.
‘I’ll stay with you forever if you let me’ Rhyn said, with a small smile.
His words sent a shiver down Sloane’s spine. It was a warm sensation though, and she realised she felt the same way. She didn’t want to leave his arms, or his home, or his world.
She looked up into his eyes, feeling every ounce of his attraction towards her, but his gaze also betrayed how much he cared for her. She knew he would do anything and everything to keep her from harm.
She reached out and grasped his hands in her own, staring deeply into his eyes.
‘And I’m yours,’ she replied. ‘If you want me?’ Sloane spoke without a single reservation and knowing sincerely within her heart that she couldn’t bear to let him go.
Rhyn’s chest rumbled in response, and in one blurred movement he grabbed hold of her waist and lifted her up into his arms. She wrapped her legs around his torso and stared down into his eyes as he held her close.
‘Are you sure?’ he asked, his voice thick with desire but also a hint of restraint. He would put her down if she asked him, but she knew that once she agreed there would be no going back.
The Rift War Page 20