by Darcy Kent
Thinking about how pissed I am with everything, I’m not paying much attention to what I’m doing and I accidently hit another shopping cart. “Oh shit. I’m so sorry. I’m not paying any attention. Are you alright?” A good looking guy smiles at me, and for the first time since I woke up, I feel a smile pulling at my lips.
“I’m fine,” he says, checking me out, and I’ll admit it feels pretty good to have his attention. “It’s my fault, I have my cart just sitting here. I just can’t figure out what kind of cheese is best for this wine I just picked up.”
I lean over and hand him a mild cheddar. “Here, you can’t go wrong with this.”
He takes it from me and drops it in the cart. “Thank you so much. I’m sure my wife will be happy with this.”
Are you fucking kidding me? I just smile and say, “I’m sure she will. I’m sorry again.” I walk away and roll my eyes. I think right now it’s best to just do my own thing. I’m obviously not good at picking men, some are married and some are complete lying assholes.
Chapter Four
Ryan
I’m sitting on my deck looking out into the forest that surrounds me. Taking another long sip of my beer, I shake my head to clear it of thoughts of Stacey. She was a complete bitch this morning and didn’t even want an explanation as to what I was doing there. She just assumed something happened. I don’t know why she thinks she knows me, but obviously she doesn’t. I haven’t seen her since I was a kid just out of high school. She doesn’t know the man I’ve become. She doesn’t know shit about me. As pissed as I may be, she still consumes my thoughts.
I’d never take advantage of a woman. I might sleep around, but I’ve never been with a woman who didn’t consent to being with me. I never have nor will I ever sleep with a woman so drunk that she can hardly stand. It bothers me that she thinks so little of me, and I can’t understand why.
Normally, I couldn’t care less what someone thinks of me, but with her it’s different. I want her to understand that I was there taking care of her, not taking advantage of her. I want her to know the real me, not the Ryan that I let everyone see. I want her respect. She Mike’s baby sister, but damn it, I’m drawn to her.
I throw back the rest of my beer, just as my buddy Todd comes and sits next to me. “Hey man, what’s up?”
“Ryan, we need to go to the bar tonight. I heard there is going to be an awesome band. When the bands are there so are the chicks,” he says with a grin.
Maybe it’s just what I need, a night out to get my mind off of Stacey. “Alright, let me just change my shirt and we can go. I’ll drive.”
When we get to Gail’s Bar, I’m not surprised to see the amount of people here since it’s open mic night. Todd and I walk up to the bar and Gail hands us each a beer. “Hey Ryan, how was your night with the beautiful blonde bombshell?”
“I took her home and made sure she was alright. Not a very exciting night,” I say as I draw back a sip of my beer.
“Sure, that’s what happened,” she mocks, but before I make my defense known she is off helping another customer. I shake my head and look over at Todd.
He grins and slaps my back. “I’m sure you made sure she was alright.”
“Todd, nothing happened.”
“Nothing happened you want to talk about. I get it, man. You can just tell me about the next woman,” he says chuckling as he walks off to a table closer to the stage so we can sit and watch the performances.
I’m starting to regret coming out already. Gail I could give a shit about, but Todd doesn’t even believe me and that pisses me off. I’ve never lied to him. He knows as much about me as Mike does. Why he thinks I’d lie about this is beyond me, but honestly, I couldn’t give a shit, right now. I follow Todd over to the table just as Jim and Dave take a seat. The four of us and Mike grew up together and through the years, we’ve been through a lot together. We’ve always got each other’s backs, even in the case of those deceitful women who forget to mention their boyfriend…or in Dave’s case, husband.
Thinking about it makes me realize no wonder no one believes that I didn’t sleep with Stacey. When I leave the bar with a woman, I always sleep with her. A lot of the visitors at Westlake Resort have definitely visited my bed.
“Hey Ryan, how was last night? I saw you leave with that chick, who is fucking hot by the way,” Jim asks as the first guy is climbing on stage for open mic.
“Actually, nothing happened.” All three of them chuckle loudly, and I shake my head. I’m getting really pissed off at this point, and ready to tell them just who she is. “Guys, I’m fucking serious. I didn’t sleep with her, why the hell is that so hard for you to understand? Do you have any idea who she is?”
I’ve lost their attention and turn to see what they are looking at. Two beautiful women who just walked in. They are with an older guy and a guy that looks to be about their age. I’ve never seen them around, so I’m sure they are here for open mic night.
“Damn, look at that one chick with the dark hair. She’s hot and looks like she could use a little company tonight,” Dave says never looking away from her.
“Make sure she isn’t married to that older guy before you make a move,” I say causing them all to chuckle again.
Gail interrupts our laughter when she announces that Alex is about to take the stage. We sit back and listen to him and damn, he’s got a great voice. It always amazes me when people as talented as him come into this bar for open mic. He should be singing on a stage in front of thousands of people, not just a few handfuls worth. I won’t be surprised if one day I turn on the radio and hear his voice, though. He’s that good, plus he’s singing a song he wrote. They guy is multi-talented.
After a few more people get up and sing— no one nearly as talented as Alex— I go to the bathroom. Before I even make my way to it, I’m stopped by no less than five people telling me they saw me leave with Stacey last night. It’s making my blood boil at this point, and I have no one to blame but myself. This is the reputation I’ve made. I sleep around and never get involved. No one views me any other way and for the first time ever, I don’t like it.
When I get back to the table I sit down and look around at the guys. I can’t do it, being here just pisses me off more. I need to get out of here and confront Stacey. I want to make her understand nothing happened, because even if no one else believes me, I want her to. “Guys, I need to call it a night. I have something I need to take care of. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.” I don’t even give them time to question me, I just get up and leave.
The drive over to Stacey’s place just pisses me off more. I don’t know if I’m angrier with myself or everyone else. I still don’t understand why I give a fuck all of a sudden. That’s not true, I know it’s because of who she is and my quest to have her respect.
I get out of my crappy Toyota pickup and slam the door. Knocking on the door, I can hear her moving around inside. She pushes open the door and looks at me with disgust. “We need to talk,” I say leaning against the railing.
“No, actually we don’t,” she says and goes to close the door.
I grab it to keep her from closing it and move closer. “Believe me, you’d know if we slept together. That I guarantee,” I say in my most seductive voice with a smirk on my face.
She pushes me away from her and stands in the doorway with her arms crossed, with that same look of disgust on her face. “You are the cockiest son of a bitch I’ve ever met. You had to come over here this late, just to say if we slept together I’d remember? Well, you know what, Ryan, maybe it’s something I don’t want to remember.”
“I didn’t come over here to be a cocky bastard, I came over here to try to make you understand that nothing happened with us. You don’t even know me, yet you assume you do. This wasn’t me as a kid, why do you question it now,” I say in a much calmer voice than she is throwing at me.
“You’re right, I don’t know you, not since you left. However, I clearly know your type. You sleep ar
ound, never giving a shit about anyone else but yourself. Sometimes you don’t even bother to get to know more than her name. Am I getting warm?” she says in an angry whisper. She’s right, though, she is a hundred percent right.
I softly laugh but out of disappointment and say, “You’re right.” She gets a cocky smile on her face and I turn to walk away. When I reach my truck I turn to look at her. “That night, though, I did the right thing. I took care of you.” I get into the truck and slam my door.
Chapter Five
Stacey
After Ryan leaves, I go into the house and sit down on the couch. No longer am I interested in TV or this bowl of ice cream. I’m so confused. What kind of guy comes to your place to tell you nothing happened and then admits that he normally does sleep around? I felt satisfied when he admitted that, but when he said that he actually did the right thing and took care of me, I don’t know, I think I believe him.
The way he said it with such sadness in his voice, it felt truthful. He never broke eye contact with me, he didn’t sweat or smile. Holy shit, what kind of lawyer am I? I should be able to know immediately if someone is lying and now I’m questioning it all. I think I may have judged him on what I heard at the bar that night. I don’t know him, not anymore, yet I assumed I knew it all.
I go into the bedroom and pull out Ryan’s shirt that I washed earlier and frown. When I told him to leave yesterday, I didn’t bother taking it off and he hadn’t asked. Maybe I shouldn’t have been such a bitch and rushed to label him. I should have listened to what he had to say instead of kicking him out of my trailer. Oh my God, what kind of person am I?
I flop down on the bed and cover my face. Even though no one can see me, I feel the need to hide. I’m humiliated that I was so awful to him, not once but twice. I’m sure he thinks I’m a bitch and he wouldn’t be wrong considering how I treated him the other day.
Not wanting to think about it anymore, I close my eyes and hope that sleep pulls me under quickly.
**
After a restless night of sleep, I get up and shower. It’s strange not to have a schedule. I’m used to getting up, showering, going to work, and repeat every day. Having this time to myself is wonderful, yet confusing. I feel like I should be doing something, not just sitting around drinking coffee. I look around the beautiful resort and decide that today I will go exploring. It’s been a long time since I’ve been here and I’d like to reacquaint myself.
Changing into a pair of cut-off jean shorts and a pink tank top, I toss on my flip flops and head out. Following the different trails, I admire the beauty around me. There is such a vast variety of trees, bushes, and flowers all mixed throughout the resort that I could walk around for weeks and never identify them all.
One path leads me to the lake, and I love the tranquil feel when I reach the water’s edge. I sit down and take it all in. It is so quiet and peaceful. The only sounds I hear are birds chirping, leaves rustling, and the water kissing the shoreline. It relaxes me, pulling me into a meditative state. In New York, I never take the time to enjoy the world around me. It moves at a sprinter's pace and you do your best to keep up. There is no time to slow down and enjoy yourself, not if you’re trying to climb the corporate ladder. The sounds I usually hear are honking horns, construction, and loud talking and that’s just on the way to work. Once I’m there it is the sound of my keyboard, the phone ringing, and the sound of the damn clock hand ticking, taunting me with how much time is passing while I do nothing to make me truly happy.
I bring my focus back to my stunning surroundings. I’m sitting a bit secluded, letting the sun beat down on me. I look across the way when I hear hammering and notice a group of guys working on a cabin. I don’t know how I missed it, I guess I was focusing too much on the beauty around me. Although, now that they have gained my attention I am pulled in to watching them. They are joking with each other and look like they are having a great time working. Makes me a little jealous that I don’t feel that same enjoy in my job.
They turn some music on, and while I can’t make out the song, the beat carries over to me and I nod my head to the rhythm. One of the guys yells to another trying to get his attention over the music, before he laughs at something inside that I can’t see. I look over and son of a bitch, it’s Ryan.
He’s shirtless, showing off that incredible upper body of his. Regret that I had pushed aside resurfaces. I don’t know where I get the courage, but I’m on my feet and walking over to the cabin. The need to apologize to him is overwhelming.
The closer I get the louder everything is—the hammering, the shouting, the music, and the laughter. Before I’m even to the cabin one of the guys notices me and flashes me a flirty grin. I smile back and walk over to him, thinking he seems to be friendly. “Hi. Is it possible for me to talk to Ryan real fast? I won’t take up much of his time.”
“Whatever he did to you, I’ll fix it,” he says giving me a wink and I laugh.
“Stacey? What are you doing?” Ryan says from behind me, shock clear in his voice.
I turn around and take a deep breath. I try to compose myself because seeing him shirtless is screwing with my head. I have no idea how he is going to react to me walking up on him while he is at work. “Can I just talk to you for a minute, please?”
He nods his head and hands his hammer to the guy that I was talking to. “Jim, I’ll be right back.”
I follow him away from all the noise, taking notice of his muscular back as his walks. I shake my head trying to focus on my apology. He stops and turns around, crossing his arms over his bare chest. “You forget to throw in a dig last night?” he says with a mix of hurt and anger in his voice.
“Ryan, I’m so sorry. I never should have rushed to judge you. I don’t have any memory of what happened the other night, and I should have believed you,” I say in my best attorney voice.
“You know what it doesn’t matter. I need to get back to work.” He goes to push past me, and I stop him with my hands on his chest.
“I fucked up, alright? I admit it. Everything I did was the complete opposite of what I was taught. You should have been innocent until proven guilty, but I had you guilty without even hearing your case.” He’s doesn’t say a word, so I continue. “I wanted a night of fun, that’s what I set out for. I saw you in the bar, and I’ll be honest, I was attracted to you. So when you came over, I was so overwhelmed with finding out who you were, I kept drinking.” I shake my head and look out at the lake. “I don’t know what else to say. I know you think I’m a bitch and I don’t blame you, I’ve been one. I’m sorry for everything.” He doesn’t say anything, but he doesn’t leave either. I don’t know what I should do at this point. I’ll admit it, I’m attracted to him. “I think I just wanted to believe so badly that someone as sexy as you would be attracted to someone like me, and I hoped we did something.” I admit, shocking myself.
He closes his eyes for a second before snapping them back open just as quickly. “Stacey, I did right by you that night, but don’t let it fool you. I came over to you at the bar for something else entirely.”
My pulse races as I wonder what kind of things he would have done to me if I hadn’t drank so much. I smile and look back to the cabin he’s working at. “So, I guess I shouldn’t keep you. But do you think you’d like to come over for dinner tonight?”
He gives me a sexy grin and asks, “Are you asking me on a date, Stacey?”
I laugh, mostly out of embarrassment and shake my head. “No. I thought it would be nice to get to know you, without alcohol.”
“I get off work at five,” is all he says and walks past me to goes back to work. I guess that means he’ll be over. For the first time in as long as I can remember, I have butterflies swarming my stomach.
Chapter Six
Ryan
When I get off of work, I go home and take a shower. Since Stacey left the job site earlier today, I haven’t been able to think about anything else. To say I was shocked to see her is an understateme
nt. I could tell she’s a woman who isn’t used to giving an apology, and I took pity on her. I wouldn’t say I’ve gained her respect, but then again I wouldn’t say she has mine.
Once I get myself showered and dressed in a black t-shirt and khaki shorts, I go outside and climb into my golf cart. I’m not expecting anything from tonight. I don’t even know if going to her place is a good idea. Hell, getting involved with her in any form isn’t a good idea. She doesn’t need someone like me in her life, not to mention Mike will beat my ass, but like I said I feel a pull to her.
When I get to her place, I knock on the door and wait. When she doesn’t answer I walk around the deck to the back and see her sitting in the chair looking out at the lake. The sun is shining on her, giving her an almost angelic appearance. She has sunglasses on blocking my view of her eyes, but the strapless sundress she has on shows off that sexy body that she has no idea that I’ve seen.