Aiden sat up. She was having a nightmare.
Liv yelled again, shouting “No” to whomever she was dreaming about. And then, her arm came down in a slashing movement and her chest heaved with a sob. Tears spilled from the corners of her still closed eyelids, rolling down her cheeks and leaving her skin wet.
“Liv.” He reached over and shook her hip, careful to only touch her where the blanket covered her skin. “Wake up.”
She thrashed again, another sob wracking her sleeping body. “Liv.” He raised his voice and shook her a little harder. “You’re having a nightmare.”
With a start, her eyes flew open and she launched into a sitting position.
“It’s okay.” He pushed himself up so that he could also sit and held his hands up to calm her. “You were dreaming.”
Her eyes were wide with fear and confusion, but finally, her eyes focused and settled on him. “I’m sorry,” she said in a whisper. Tears slipped silently from the corners of her eyes. “I’m sorry.”
What in the hell did she have to be sorry about. “Do you want to tell me about it?”
She shook her head as if she didn’t want to, but after taking a deep breath, her wide, fearful eyes met his. “I … I killed that guy. I keep seeing it.”
“He would have killed you. You know that.”
“That doesn’t make it any better. I murdered him, and now he’s going to haunt me forever.”
Aiden didn’t have a lot of experience with comforting people over this sort of thing, but he did remember what it was like to have killed those first times after he had joined the Reaper Army.
Before considering what he was doing, he moved backward until his pillows were against the headboard and then, using the sheet, he reached over and wrapped her in the fabric, then dragged her over so that she was resting between his legs and her back was against his chest.
He wrapped his arms around her, keeping the thin sheet between them. She didn’t resist, in fact, she seemed to appreciate the contact by the way she snuggled back against him. He could hear and feel that she was still crying, though.
“Listen,” he began. “There are some things you won’t ever forget. Things that traumatize you, things that hurt and things that change your life forever. These things can be good … or they can be bad, but the memories of them stay with you, all the same. The trick is to use these things to drive you harder toward your goals. Use the bad things and make them good things. Suffering is what makes us strong.”
Liv sniffed and wiped at her tears. “I don’t want to suffer. I know that sounds selfish, but it’s true.”
“It’s okay to feel that way. There isn’t anything wrong with being selfish once in a while.”
She let out a rough laugh. “Yeah, you would know right.”
“Yeah. I’m not shy about it. I’m one of the most selfish people you will ever meet. Jack … and the Empress are the only ones I have ever put before myself.”
“I just want the guilt to go away.”
He nodded even though she couldn’t see him. “It will fade, but it probably won’t ever go away.”
She stayed silent, probably contemplating his words. Eventually, the silence stretched out so long that they both must have fallen asleep because he woke to both of their phones and an alarm clock beeping at them in different tones.
He peeled his eyes open and groaned a bit as he realized his neck was kinked from being tilted at an odd angle for so long. Liv was still wrapped in the sheet and tucked up against him. He leaned over, stretching his arm out in an effort to reach the nightstand where his phone sat.
Liv must have felt him moving because she stirred and then jolted upright. “Oh …” Her hands went to her hair, smoothing back the mussed strands. “I’m sorry, I fell asleep.” She rolled over to her side of the bed and slapped her alarm clock and snagged her phone so that she could turn that alarm off too.
Aiden finally reached his and frantically poked at it until the alarms stopped buzzing.
“Good grief.” Liv breathed the words. “I guess setting all the alarms probably wasn’t the best idea.”
He had to agree, but they did need to get up and start getting ready to go. They had a big day ahead of them and once again, they were going on only a few hours of sleep. He usually could function on only a few hours of sleep, but this was one of those days where he truly wished he could close his eyes for another hour or so. It was only 4:00AM and still dark outside.
He pushed the blanket away from his body slid out of the bed. “I’m going to go take a quick shower and get dressed.” He didn’t wait for her to respond, he simply left the room and turned down the hall to the room where his things were. Grabbing a fresh set of clothes, he hurried to the shower. Liv was going to want to use it soon, so he didn’t want to take too much time.
Once he was under the steaming hot water. He realized that he’d been a bit cold when he had left her room. Small talk and acting like he cared wasn’t really his gig. But, that was why he had left that way. For some fucked up reason, he did care about her feelings.
When he was done in the shower he dressed in a pair of black jeans, black tee shirt and a red zip up hoodie. He didn’t use his black one because they weren’t really going in on a stealth mission so he wasn’t worried about blending in with the shadows.
He found Liv in the kitchen, pouring the first cup of coffee from the pot into a mug. “The coffee is ready,” she informed him. “I’m going to take a shower now.” With those last words she headed back toward the hallway, carrying her mug with her.
Shit, he’d pissed her off.
He poured himself a cup of black coffee and took it with him as he went back to the room to get his weapons ready. He sipped the coffee and then set it down on the dresser. Already, Liv was invading his thoughts more than he wanted her to. He didn’t want to get attached. It was just sex he’d said. What he didn’t realize was that the sex was just him acting on the attraction that was already there.
He was so screwed.
He put his holster on under the hoodie and then strapped two knives onto the sides of his calves. He spent some time counting ammo and checking clips before throwing the rest of the weapons into one of the duffle bags. He had a decent selection of guns and knives, but he hoped that they wouldn’t have to use any of them.
The Empress had said that she was backing off, but he knew her, probably better than her own son did, and she was manipulative. She would know that they were going to go to the compound to make sure and he had a strong feeling that Reapers would be there waiting for them.
Alma crossed his mind briefly and he considered calling her again, but then tossed that thought aside. After the last call, he knew she wouldn’t leave unless he could tell her for sure that she was in danger.
They were just going to have to wing it and make choices as they went along. Grabbing his duffle, he slung it over his shoulder and then took hold of his coffee cup in the other and made his way back to the kitchen.
He was on his second cup of coffee when Liv entered the room. She had her dark red hair pulled back and braided into a thick rope at the back of her head. She also had on black jeans, but hers were fitted and tight against her form. She had on running shoes and a teal tank top. She had a black hoodie tossed over her arm.
A hip holster that held two guns and a knife rested on her hips. He knew it was wrong of him, but the sight of her wearing weapons turned him on. The thought wasn’t only wrong, but also strange, since he’d been around women who wore weapons all the time.
“You ready?” she asked, lifting her purse and slipping the strap over her shoulder.
He went to the sink and rinsed out his coffee cup and then turned to meet her eyes. She showed no indication of whether last night or this morning was bothering her. Her dark brown irises were flat and emotionless.
Forget it, Aiden. She’s just a Keeper. Just another woman who you spent the night with. Nothing more.
Those were the words h
e told himself. Because for the first time in his entire life, he was fighting his own emotions. He actually fucking cared. But those thoughts were thoughts he was going to have to address on a different day. “Yeah.” He nodded, “Let’s get this shit over with.”
Since Aiden’s SUV was still at the bar, he rode with her over to the farmhouse. She could barely look at him since they woke up. It was the first time she had ever slept in someone’s arms all night and she wasn’t exactly sure how she was supposed to go about the whole ‘morning after’ thing. This was not the time for her to worry about such things though, all her concentration needed to be on the mission.
She could feel him glance at her from time to time on the drive over, but he remained silent as well. He hadn’t said a word about the night before and she had asked him not to say anything around her family, so she hoped he would keep his mouth shut. The last thing she needed was to fight with her brothers and sisters about something that didn’t matter because it wasn’t going anywhere.
All morning, she had been telling herself that him acting like nothing had happened the night before didn’t bother her, but it actually bothered the crap out of her. Confusion was the most prominent feeling. She didn’t know what she wanted from him and she had told him that she didn’t want anything but sex, so he was giving her what she asked for. How could she be angry if he was doing exactly as she asked.
The farmhouse was already alive with activity when they arrived.
Just as Liv entered with Aiden following right behind her, James burst through the kitchen door. “It’s about time. We have to get moving.”
“I know,” Liv told him. “We’re here now.”
James, like most of the men, wore jeans and tee shirt. He had one gun resting in his single belt holster. She knew that he wore knives as well. Their family carried knives pretty much all the time. The knives were always made of silver, since the metal was poison to Reapers. It wouldn’t kill them unless they were stabbed multiple times, but once usually gave a Keeper enough time to run if they had to. The majority of the time, the Reaper was the one to flee if they were stabbed, since staying to fight would usually not end well for them.
James flicked his eyes back and forth between her and Aiden. “You look like shit. How much sleep did you get?”
“Not much.” She set her purse on the buffet table by the stairs.
Dan entered the room, obviously hearing the conversation. “Maybe you would have gotten more sleep if you weren’t making out in a public pool with a Reaper all night long.”
“Don’t start, Dan.” She warned.
He whirled and pointed at her. “I will start whatever the fuck I want to start. I fucking knew he shouldn’t be staying with you.”
“I told you, nothing happened. We were just swimming.”
“Yeah right.” Her brother glared at Aiden. “You better watch your step, Reaper. Just because she’s there doesn’t mean you can take advantage of her.”
Aiden glared back at him but didn’t say anything. Dan’s eyes widened. “What, no smart ass remark from you?”
James’ attention volleyed back and forth between Liv, Dan and Aiden. “Did I miss something? What the hell happened?”
“Nothing,” Liv seethed at the same time as Dan pointed at Aiden and said, “Last night, that mother fucker was caught by Sheriff Davis making out with our sister in the pool.”
Aiden stepped toward Dan so that her brother’s finger was pressed up against his chest. “Look, Keeper. I understand that you are protecting your sister, but I am only going to let this shit go so far. I fucking get it, I would be the same way if it was my sister. However … I won’t let you keep accusing me of taking advantage of her. I would never do anything with anyone who wasn’t fully consensual. I am an asshole, I know that. I’m well known for sleeping with women and never speaking to them again, but not once have I ever forced a woman to be with me. If there is even the slightest chance they are too drunk or even too fucking struck by my charm to make a conscious decision, then it doesn’t happen.”
Aiden took a breath. “This is the last time I will stand here and let you run your mouth, accusing me of something I didn’t do or have any plans on doing. So knock this shit off.”
Dan lowered his finger, but continued to glare. “I will never stop protecting my family from Reapers.”
“We’ve discussed this too many times to count. I’m tired of going in circles with you.”
“I’ll run those circles until it’s crystal clear to you.”
“Oh, it is to me. You’re the one who needs to fucking chill out and worry about yourself.”
Liv decided she had let them go on long enough and stepped between them. “Enough. We have bigger things to worry about today.”
Aiden immediately stepped away from her brother and relaxed his stance. But Dan, continued to glare. “I still don’t trust him around you.”
“Shut up, Dan. I’m a big girl and I can take care of myself.”
“Enough.” Greg entered the room, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. “Liv is right, she can take care of herself.”
“Thank you, Greg.” She breathed. Finally, someone on her side.
He nodded. “Personally, I don’t want to know who my sister is sleeping with.” His eyes went to Aiden. “But, she’s welcome to choose whoever she wants.”
Liv realized that Greg had just given his blessing to Aiden, but also told him with a mere glance that it was up to Liv to decide. Why was her personal life seemingly dependent on her family?
“Look, we have a mission that we need to be getting ready for,” she began. “I don’t know why any of this is even a discussion right now. It’s super early in the morning and I don’t want to talk about any of it because there is no reason to talk about it. Can we please just go now?”
Greg nodded. “Good plan. Let’s move.”
They packed up the duffels full of weapons and loaded up into Jacks truck. The truck was only supposed to hold six people but they decided that they had best squeeze the seven of them into the truck instead of taking two vehicles.
They could have taken her van, but the van didn’t handle the turns over the mountain as well as Jack’s truck did. So, she ended up sitting on Aiden’s lap because none of her brothers wanted her sitting on theirs and they sure as hell weren’t going to sit on another dudes lap.
After a bout of hugs and a passionate kiss between Lucy and Jack, Lucy, Steph, Hannah and David stood on the porch, waving farewell as they pulled away from the farmhouse. Liv stared through the window as they disappeared from view and silently prayed that they would make it back to see them again.
In the back seat of the truck, Aiden slid his arms around her middle and without realizing it, she settled back against him. Thank god Dan was in the front, she just didn’t want to deal with that shit right now.
Ethan was beside them though, and that wasn’t a whole lot better because he kept giving them the side eye. Aiden was right, everyone knew. If they didn’t suspect that they had been together already, then they saw the obvious attraction between them.
She thought she kept it under wraps, but apparently it wasn’t as discreet as she had originally felt it been.
Aiden’s arms stayed over her clothes, keeping the burn away, but his hands rested on her upper thighs. His breath was hot against her bare neck, and suddenly all she could think about was his lips against that tender skin. Flashes of the night began to play in her head … the hot tub, the shower, their bodies moving together. How in the world was she supposed to concentrate on the mission when all she could think about was how much she wanted him?
She squirmed a tiny bit, trying to rid herself of those thoughts when she felt him grow hard beneath her. Then, his lips were so close to her ear that she felt a sizzle as they brushed against her lobe. “Don’t do that,” he growled in a whisper.
And that made her even hotter. She wanted to tease him, she wanted him to want her. His grip on her thighs tightened,
as if he were trying to hold her down and keep her still.
Holy crap, they were sitting with five other people in a moving vehicle. What in the hell was wrong with her?
Ethan glanced over at her and raised his eyebrows. She couldn’t help but feel like he knew what was happening, what had happened, and at this rate, what was bound to happen again. She raised her eyebrows back at him.
She loved Ethan. He was her brother even though he wasn’t by blood, an Estmond. He and Lucy had been through their fair share of things, emotionally, but she knew, just like everyone else in the family did, that he was still in love with Lucy.
He had put a stop to the sex a long time ago, thank god, because Lucy would never love him like he loved her. Now that Lucy was with Jack, she knew he was holding in all of his emotions and there was a bitterness that still ran deep within him.
Everyone knew that, up until when Jack came into the picture, Ethan still had hopes that one day Lucy would realize that she was in love with him too. Slowly, he was starting to understand that was never going to happen.
Liv, like the rest of the family, including Lucy, felt bad for him. They all knew that being a Keeper and having a relationship with someone who wasn’t also a Keeper, was not an easy thing to do. Hopefully he would find some peace with that eventually, but for now, she knew that he was hurting.
A shake of his head told her that he did know and he had heard Aiden’s warning not to move around. She shrugged and turned to face the window so that she didn’t have to endure his judgmental stares.
When she shifted, a sharp intake of breath from Aiden told her that he was struggling and probably had the same issues as she was having. Thinking of what they had done was a turn on and she wanted more. She knew he did too.
As they headed up the mountain, the natural twists and turns of the road caused her body to shift even when she didn’t want it to. She took hold of the overhead handle and held on, trying to hold herself steady.
Good lord, if Aiden didn’t get this shit under control he was going to have a serious problem when they got out of the truck. As they drove though, the hardness she felt beneath her disappeared as he grew used to having her on his lap. Thank god, the last thing they needed was Dan having a hay day with that. Aiden would never hear the end of it.
Keeper Under Fire (Graveyard Guardians Book 3) Page 14