“The brothers of Alpha Sigma would like to welcome back the lovely ladies of Kappa Kappa Beta back to Palm South for spring semester. We proudly present our new pledges,” Adam says, before reading off a small list of names. Kip is one of only eight pledges, and he’s the only junior. “We’ve asked each pledge to prepare something to tell you a little about themselves. Wesley, we’ll start with you.”
They go down the line performing ridiculous stunts or talents to try to stand out, telling us about their interests, hobbies, background and majors via poems, songs, athletic stunts and more. Kip is the last to speak, and when he does I feel my throat tighten, along with my thighs.
He smiles and licks his lips, his eyes smoldering, which causes practically the entire chapter room to swoon. Suddenly, he turns to the other pledges. “Hit it, boys!”
They all break out into different beats, starting down at one end and making their way toward Kip, each pledge adding a new sound. There’s bass and treble and everything in-between as they lay down a beat with their mouths. Once the rhythm is all set up, Kip turns to the crowd and starts to rap.
Yes, rap.
Let me tell you a story about this girl I met,
She had the bluest eyes that were hard to forget.
She challenged me to a game of foosball,
Little did I know that I would lose all.
Cinderella stole a kiss and then she ran away,
So I gave her some space for a couple of days.
Then I took a thousand bucks and I played my cards right,
I bought a date with the princess last Saturday night.
And now here I am to collect my prize,
No more running and no more lies,
It’s been over a week and now I’m ready for my date,
So what’ya say, Skyler Thorne, can I pick you up at eight?
The beat drops and everyone goes crazy, a mixture of claps, laughter, and cheers. Then, all eyes are on me – including Adam’s. He doesn’t seem too thrilled with Kip’s stunt, but he can’t say that here.
Kip’s eyes are hard on mine, his smile unwavering.
And I want to kill him.
Or do I want to kiss him?
Damn, I think it’s a little bit of both.
I stare back at the eyes around me before finding my Big’s. She tilts her head toward Kip and gives me the eyes like, “Hello?! Say yes!”
I find Kip again and he’s still smiling, completely calm and collected as the whole room waits for me to speak. I swallow the lump in my throat and force a smile. Poker face, Skyler.
“About time you did this the right way, pledge. I guess you can take me out. Friday night. And seven, not eight.” I wink and everyone cheers. My Little nudges my elbow and lifts her brows, so I give her a quick smile as the boys leave the room. Kip eyes me the entire time he walks, his blue eyes lighting my skin on fire. Once they’re gone, Erin adjourns and I immediately head for my room as the other sisters clear out.
Cassie and Jess chase after me, sliding through my bedroom door before it even has the chance to close. I share a room with Jess, so I can’t really escape her, but I have a feeling it’s about to be a party in here.
“Oh my God!” Jess says, her voice squeaking. “That was probably the hottest thing I’ve ever witnessed. I wonder where he’s going to take you!”
Cassie rolls her eyes and drops down on the bed beside me. “Are you okay? Does this mean you’re really doing this? You’re really going to play him for Ex?”
I sigh, burying my head in my hands. I have three answers going through my head for that question she just asked – the answer my Big wants to hear, the answer I want to hear, and the truth.
The truth being that I don’t want to play this game and I know if I go on this date, I’m going to like Kip even more than I already do.
And I’m not even allowed to like him this much.
Erin and Ashlei burst through the door, Erin running straight up to me while Ashlei hops up onto Jess’s bed.
“This is so perfect, Little! I knew you would come through. I’ve been so busy getting everything situated for the semester that I haven’t had time to check in and here you are outperforming what even I could imagine!” She smiles a huge smile and pulls me in for a hug. “I knew there was a reason I picked you as my Little. You’re a bad ass, just like me.”
We all laugh, though mine sounds like a mixture of a cough and a sneeze. The girls start talking rapidly, guessing where Kip will take me and planning out what I’ll wear. I smile and nod when appropriate, but my Little locks eyes with me and I know she knows. She sees it, she’s reading through my poker face. At this point, I just don’t have the energy to fake it.
And I can’t let them see me sweat.
“Girls, I’m really, really tired. Can we meet after morning classes tomorrow to talk about dresses and date options?” I throw on the biggest smile I can and shake my head. “You girls know I’ll need you if I want to look anything close to cute.”
They all giggle and Ashlei hops off Jess’s bed. “Oh, we’ve got you, girl! Ex, let’s go rummage through your closet and find something sexy, but not too revealing. You want us to accentuate the boobs or the butt, Sky?”
I suck on the inside of my bottom lip and force another smile. “You choose, I trust you.”
“I’m going to study with Greg tonight,” Jess says, hopping into a pair of jeans and throwing on a hoodie as Erin and Ashlei head out the door. “I’ll try not to wake you when I get home.”
I shrug, kicking off my heels and tucking myself under the covers. “You’re fine, J-Love. I’m a heavy sleeper.”
Cassie smiles at Jess. “Studying, huh?”
Jess gives a sheepish grin and bites her bottom lip before ducking out the door. “Night, losers.”
Cassie and I are left alone, her legs still swinging off my bed. Please, Little. Don’t ask me what’s wrong, don’t ask if I’m okay.
“You know, you don’t have to do this,” she says quietly, her eyes on the floor. “You don’t have to put yourself through hell just to play a stupid game.”
I snort. “We both know that isn’t true.”
“You really think Ex wouldn’t make you president just because you didn’t play with her ex-boy toy?”
I pull the covers over my head and let out a long breath. “I don’t know, Little. You know your Grand Big. She’s one of those girls who’s used to getting what she wants. If this is what she has in mind for me to prove I can sacrifice for this position, I’m going to do it. It’s our Greek line tradition to be president, and I don’t want it to end with me.”
The room is silent for a minute, most likely because Cassie knows I’m right. After a while, I feel her weight leave the bed and her voice comes from near the door. “Want me to turn the light off?”
“Please,” I say quietly, almost too quietly. She hears me, though, and a few seconds later the light flicks off and the door shuts, leaving me to my thoughts. I let them wander to Kip, to his blue eyes and smooth skin, to the stubble that runs along his jaw, to his goofy smile and incredible arms.
The game is on, now. He made a public move and all eyes are on us – watching, waiting. I can’t back out now, I can’t play the let’s just be friends card anymore. No, he’s marked me as his and I’ve accepted the challenge, except my acceptance is fake and untrustworthy. I’ve been issued a mission, and I have no choice but to complete it. I’m about to play this guy like a hot Blackjack table in a crowded casino.
And he has no idea what’s coming.
My feet and calves are completely numb, my body shaking uncontrollably and I should be thinking about my founders but instead I’m thinking about Skyler. Adam is getting closer and closer to me, and if I fuck up and don’t give the right answer again, my pledge brothers and I are going to be stuck in this pool of ice water for another round.
Focus, Kip. Founders – think founders. George Ruthenlaw, Harry Winters, James Johnson, Skyler Thorne.
; Shit!
“Pledge Jackson,” Adam says, walking to stand in front of me. My teeth are chattering under my lips as his eyes bore into mine. “Name the three founders of Alpha Sigma who helped the sisters of Pi Gamma Zeta sneak out of their dorms when they were founding their sorority.”
I take a deep breath and try to let my brain do the work on its own. I’ve studied my founders more than my actual schoolwork. I know this.
“Harry Winters, Edward Sanders, and…” I pause, waiting for the last name to come to me. I know this, I know this.
“Ten. Nine.” Adam starts to count down and my pledge brothers groan. Some shout out encouragements, others choose to offer profanities. I block everything out and zero in on the book of our founders, on our history. Think, Kip, think.
“Clarence Bell?” I say, though it comes out more like a question. Everyone shivers and is quiet for a minute, waiting on bated breath. Finally, Adam simply nods and moves on to the next pledge. I let out a relieved breath, but it’s not over yet.
As Adam asks the final question to Christopher, the pledge next to me, I catch his eyes shifting over to me still. He seems almost pissed off that I answered correctly, and I can’t help but feel it has something to do with Skyler. I heard they had a fling last year, but apparently it’s a fling Adam hasn’t let go of yet. Ever since I bid on her at the auction, he’s been giving me the cold shoulder – a complete one-eighty from the bromance flirting that was happening the night of rush. This is the last thing I need. As if things aren’t complicated as it is, now my president is aiming his arrows at the target he glued on my back.
So much for flying under the radar.
Thankfully, Christopher answers the last question correctly and we all simultaneously jump out of the water. A few of the brothers watching throw us towels and tell us to wrap up our feet while they grab us some hot water to sip. I sit down on the couch next to Kade and cross my arms over my chest, still shivering.
“Holy balls, I’m freezing,” Kade says, but a huge smile is plastered to his face. He loves this pledging stuff, maybe a little too much, actually.
“I’m pretty sure I need a wheelchair, no way my legs work now.”
He laughs a little. “You better make them work – don’t you pick Miss Poker Star up at seven tonight?”
I smile a shit-eating grin that I can’t help but have when someone mentions Skyler, no matter how badly I wish I could. “She can push me around in the wheelchair. That’s romantic, right?”
“Totally. Candles, roses, and wheelchairs – the perfect recipe to get laid.”
“I should patent that.”
Kade and I laugh just as Adam walks up. The severity of his facial expression makes us both cut our laughs short and cough a little. He hands us two cups of hot water and Kade immediately sips his, which I know burns the shit out of his tongue but he doesn’t say anything.
“Kip, can I talk to you for a second?” Adam asks and before I even have the chance to answer, Kade jumps up and moves to join a few other pledges by the pool table. Adam takes his place and looks over at me, studying.
“Are you taking Skyler out tonight?”
I sip the hot liquid from my cup and nod, avoiding words for as long as I can. I’m not ever the kind of guy to back down from another man, but he’s my president and I respect him. I don’t want to piss him off and I damn sure don’t want to get kicked out of Alpha Sig before I even officially get in.
Adam sighs and runs his fingers through his hair, staring straight ahead. “Listen, I don’t have claims on her or anything, but I still care about her. And I swear to God if you fuck her over I will personally fuck you up.”
My temper flares automatically and I grip the cup a little tighter. Who the hell does he think he is? I would never hurt Skyler – hell, I’m the one that was there last week to protect her from getting hurt.
But then I remember that I will hurt her, whether I want to or not. It will happen. It’s inevitable. But by then the semester will be over, and I can transfer to Alpha Sigma at UCLA. That was my plan – get in, have a little fun, get out – no matter what happens, I won’t be staying here and I can’t escape what I have to do. I didn’t expect to feel for the one girl I came here to take down, but I guess we can’t always get what we want.
Or whatever that fucking saying is.
“You won’t have to do that,” I assure him, not exactly sure what else to say. He looks at me once more and nods curtly before standing, his point made. As he walks to join a few brothers in the kitchen, I realize the brotherly bonding that was happening between us at rush is completely off the table at this point. He’s watching me, Erin is watching me, Dad is watching me and I’m watching Skyler.
Something is bound to break under the weight of these glares.
My phone buzzes with a text from Skyler.
- Any way I can get you to reschedule tonight? I’m dead tired and really just want to stay in my sweat pants. –
- So stay in your sweat pants. You’re not getting out of this date. –
- :( You hate me. –
- Quite the opposite, actually. See you at seven. And I’m serious about the sweats. -
I shove my phone back in my pocket and rub my leg with my hands, trying to get warm. I’ve been thinking about Skyler all week, about our date and where I should take her, but I haven’t received actual words from her until now. She skipped class altogether yesterday, which left me confused and double fisting two Starbucks drinks. I took a picture of her cup where the drink was written and texted it to her with a simple question mark as the caption. She responded with a meme of Grumpy Cat saying “no” and that was the most I got. The rest of my texts went unanswered, she avoided Greek Library and the cafeteria from what I could tell, and when I asked her Little if she was okay, I just got a smile and a shrug as she moved past me down the hall.
I had a feeling she was going to try to bail on tonight, but I also knew I wouldn’t let her. It’s obvious Erin is telling her to stay away from me, but that’s not part of my plan. Erin is a speed bump and I’m driving a big ass truck with no regard for her attempted warning to slow down or stop.
“You coming, bro? We’re gonna grab some drinks at Ralph’s,” Kade says, motioning to the door with Christopher and a few other pledges.
“Probably not a smart idea to get hammered before my date,” I say, standing. “Have one or five for me.”
He shakes his head. “You got it, man. Don’t get too caught up in this girl – pledging is about spending time with your brothers, you know.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll come by and spoon you later, boo. Promise.”
The guys laugh and Kade punches my arm. I wait a few minutes after they leave before pulling myself from the couch, my feet and legs still red and sore from the ice water. Checking my phone, I realize I only have a few hours before I see Skyler. I consider writing a scene of how I want the night to go, of how our relationship would unfold if I didn’t have an ulterior motive. I’d pick her up in a nice rental car, we’d go to dinner and then walk on the beach before sharing a romantic kiss. We would date off and on throughout the seasons, battling the drama of Greek life and maybe parents or friends trying to keep us apart. We’d be the fan favorites, they would all root for us and the episodes where we made up would send rankings sky high. It would make for a good show – an addicting show – maybe quality enough for my final project in Writing for Television.
But the reality is we’re getting cancelled after the first season, no matter how I write it.
“Make it quick, Dad. I’m busy,” I answer, locking my apartment door behind me. Of course he waits until I’m leaving for the sorority house to call.
“Well hello to you too, Son.”
I roll my eyes, like we’ve ever been the kind for niceties.
“I just wanted to see how things were going. I haven’t heard from you. Are you watching her?”
“I’m going to hang out with her right now. I think I might have he
r convinced to let me help with tournaments this semester.”
“Perfect. Attaboy,” he says, coughing. I picture him holed up in his office while Mom paints in the foyer, his mind more focused on poker than spending any time with her. “I know I don’t say it often, but I’m proud of you, Son. Putting your old man’s dreams before your own is very admirable.”
I scoff. “I didn’t exactly have a choice, did I?”
He’s silent for a moment before answering. “I just, you know how much this means to me, and whether you agree with it or not I appreciate you doing this for me. If I could do it myself you know I would.”
“I know, Dad.” I sigh, kicking a rock with my shoe as I walk. Dad used to play poker when he was younger, back before he met Mom. After he found out she was pregnant with me, he joined the Army to provide for us, and that became more important to him – or so he says. He never really dropped his dream, and since he couldn’t hold a high position in the Army and gamble, too, he forced me into it. He was convinced his “pride and joy” bouncing baby boy would make him proud.
He taught me from a young age and I tried as hard as I could to impress him, to learn from him, but the truth is I’m just not that great at poker. I wanted to be when I was younger, when I didn’t realize I wanted other things in life, but I failed miserably when placed next to his expectations. I’ve won small tournaments, but I get obliterated when I have to play anyone with real talent. I hate seeing disappointment on my dad’s face when I lose, but not as much as I hate the pleading look he gives me when he asks me to keep trying. This is it, my last chance to show up and be done with this shit forever – to finally do what I want.
Maybe it’s good that he called, maybe this is what I needed to focus tonight.
Dad coughs again, a loud and wet cough. “Okay then,” he says. “Call me when you get everything squared away.” He always ends our phone calls with that, and I never know what he means. It’s military talk for getting things in line, but I can’t tell what exactly he means – when school is in line? When Skyler is in line? When my life is in line? Who knows. He always asks, and I never call – I just wait for him to do it, instead.
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