“Wow, these are spectacular,” he said as he scrolled through the pictures.
“You’d have to be pretty incompetent to take a bad picture in Maui, but…I don’t think there’s anything really unique. You’ve seen the pictures in the Geographic Universe, right? They always have the most amazing photos.”
Still staring at the screen and clicking on photos, he nodded. “I know what you mean. But still, yours are exquisite.”
She’d love to photograph him right now, with his expression of deep concentration and the way he pursed his lips and twitched them to the left. It was so unique. So him. She darted into the bedroom, returned with her Nikon and snapped a few candid pics before he noticed what she was up to.
When he looked up and saw her, he grimaced and put a hand in front of his face. “That won’t win you any contests.”
“These are just for me.” She smiled and lowered her camera. “I should get some of your dog.” They’d dropped him off at Luke’s condo before coming here.
“He’s not my dog.” Luke was turned in the chair, his legs spread, one arm resting along the back of the chair, the other on the table. Nothing special about the pose, but he wore a very tiny smile, and he seemed so relaxed. Even on the boat, he’d been tense, almost remote. She moved closer and swept that mischievous lock of hair off his forehead, then raised the camera and snapped another picture.
When she looked up from the camera’s image display, he’d lost his smile and the tenseness had returned to his features. And in his dark eyes was that barely caged need she’d sensed earlier.
And she felt the same. A desire to be in his arms and to be kissed and, yes, even more. An ache throbbed deep inside, between her thighs, insistent, demanding to be filled. By him.
Feeling deprived of oxygen, she took in a long, quivering breath and saw his gaze shift from her eyes to her chest. As if they’d been touched, her nipples responded, tightening to the point of pain—or rather, her left one did. The reconstructed one on the right did nothing, felt nothing. Thank goodness she’d changed into shorts and a T-shirt at the marina. He wouldn’t be able to tell one breast was different than the other.
Even now, six months after the reconstruction, she always wore clothes that covered the scars. Their redness had faded to pink, and the swelling was almost nonexistent. But they still weren’t a pretty sight.
They never would be.
Like a cold splash of water, her desire was doused, leaving only a hissing smoky mess.
She latched on to the nearest distraction. Lunch. If she couldn’t satisfy one hunger, she’d fill another. “Man, I’m starving, aren’t you?” Grabbing a sandwich off the table, she sat in the chair farthest from Luke, unwrapped and bit into the pita bread with gusto.
Luke swiveled to face her across the table and reached for the other sandwich. But his attention was on her laptop screen. He clicked again and again and finally said, “Is this your mom? You look like her.”
Her mom? There shouldn’t be any pictures of her mother in the Maui folder. What file had he opened? No! She jumped up and slammed the laptop closed.
“What the…” Luke leaned back, his hands in the air at his shoulders. He looked at her as if she were crazy.
She tried to make herself laugh, but it probably sounded more like a hyena. “Those are my personal pictures.” She shrugged. “You know, just dumb, embarrassing family stuff.” Okay, that was pretty much true, if not the whole truth.
He stared at her, frowning. “Yeah, sure. I’m sorry.” He lowered his hands and rubbed them on his thighs. “I shouldn’t have opened the folder without permission.”
Kristen couldn’t think of a thing to say. A part of her wanted to explain. But there’d be no going back once he knew. Still, what’s the worst that could happen? She pictured herself telling him. He’d look at her with pity and mumble some excuse about having to be somewhere.
“You know—” Luke glanced at his watch “—I better get going.” He stood.
Kristen blinked. “Oh, uh, fine.” She got to her feet, still feeling she should explain everything, but she just couldn’t force the words past her lips. While she quarreled with herself, he had already made his way to the door. She followed, telling him goodbye as if in a daze.
After the door closed she stood there, a sharp pain slamming into her temples. She gripped her head and squeezed her eyes closed. Now what had she done?
7
“MAI TAI OR A BLUE HAWAII, ma’am?” Kristen offered her tray of cocktails to the older couple in the front row.
Every year, South Shore Cruises hosted a luau for their customers and hired Tradewinds to cater traditional luau foods and drinks. Roasted pig, Lomilomi salmon, long rice, Haupia, a coconut pudding and, of course, poi.
The touring company had set up a small stage in the sand, brought in tiki torches to light the beach and lined up dozens of seating pads for their customers to sit on. As the native dancers in their grass skirts and feather headdresses took the stage, Kristen saw Amy serving the food. The drums pounded and the dancers in their grass skirts and feather headdresses mesmerized the audience with their hips swaying and shaking.
The luau was also open to the public for a fee. But Luke hadn’t shown up.
As she served Mai Tais and Blue Hawaiis, Kristen kept checking his balcony. No light showed through his sliding door. A couple of times the hairs on her neck rose and she’d glance at his balcony. But she never saw anything.
The fire dancers ended the night’s entertainment with breathtaking feats, twirling flaming sticks and tossing them back and forth. By ten the families with children and most of the older folks packed up and strolled back to their accommodation.
That’s when the real party began.
Kristen happily clocked out, with Amy right behind her. The stage was taken apart and removed and a bonfire was lit. Rock music blared from car speakers and ice chests of beer appeared from the tailgates of trucks.
Amy changed from her grass skirt into a bikini and flirted with a couple of guys from Ohio. Whatever had happened between her and Kekoa was definitely over. As Kristen surveyed the crowd it seemed as though everyone around the bonfire was paired up. Some had already started kissing and snuggling.
An ache jabbed her chest. She grabbed a beer, twisted the top off and took a swig.
Luke hadn’t come.
She took another long drink of the cold beer, feeling it hit her empty stomach. She’d had three strikes with Luke and she was out. That thought needed another long swallow. How had it come to this?
When she’d first arrived in Maui she’d planned to have a sexual adventure. Go crazy and enjoy life to the fullest.
Her hair had grown back, she’d regained the weight she’d lost and her strength had returned. And she’d finally begun to feel like a sexual being again after two and a half long years.
Since most of the guys she met here were only looking for one thing, she’d assumed it’d be easy to have a fun fling.
But the guys had all seemed like boys. Silly, immature. She just hadn’t been attracted. She wanted something…more.
Wow, these were small bottles of beer. She grabbed another, twisted off the cap and gulped down several swallows.
So, did that make her a prude? Even before facing death at twenty-one she’d never been the kind to enjoy a quick roll in the sack. She’d had a steady boyfriend in college. And that was about it for sexual experience. Not that she was ready for marriage. But before sex, she wanted romance, a connection.
Luke.
She took another sip.
He wasn’t like the young men she’d met here. He understood what it was to look into the abyss and feel it sucking you in. Even before she’d known about him serving in Afghanistan she’d sensed that dark side of him. The something more she wanted was with Luke.
If she wanted that—and if it wasn’t already too late—she’d have to tell him the truth. She’d have to risk his pity. And his rejection. So, what else was new?
she scoffed, finishing off the second beer.
So, what was she going to do, remain celibate the rest of her life? If not, she’d have to tell some man, someday. Did she want a full life, or didn’t she? To live, to really live, meant experiencing everything, the good, the bad, the ugly.
She pushed off the sand and made her way over to Amy. “Hey.”
Her friend met her gaze, frowned and jumped to her feet. “What is it?”
Kristen lifted her chin. “I’m going to Luke’s.”
Amy’s brows rose. “You go, girl!” She held her hand up for Kristen to wait. “But tell Captain Mysterious, if he hurts you, I’ll feed his man parts to the sharks.”
Kristen grinned, the image taking her mind off her nervousness. She hugged her friend, and then took off at a jog away from the beach, across the street and all the way to the front of her building. Pausing, she looked up at Luke’s balcony.
A shadow moved and then a dark figure appeared, lit only by the extended light from the flickering flames of the bonfire. He stared down at her and she whispered his name. Without waiting to see what he might do, she entered the lobby and then the elevator. She punched the button for the fifth floor and when it stopped there, she strode to Luke’s door and knocked before she had time to lose her courage.
She was out of breath and trembling when he opened the door. “Luke,” she gasped, trying to catch her breath.
He took her hand and led her inside, then quietly closed the door behind her. His condo was dark. But she could see his tall form in front of her. “What’s wrong?” He sounded suspicious, but she could also hear the fatigue in his deep voice.
The dog’s cold nose nudged her thigh and she startled, and then petted the animal.
“Go lie down, dog,” Luke ordered, and the dog obeyed.
“Luke.” She laid her palms flat on his chest. His bare chest. His skin was hot. Instinctively she ran her hands up over his shoulders and back down to rest at the waistband of his jeans. She heard his swift intake of breath. “Luke, I don’t want to be just friends.” She rose up on her toes and kissed under his jaw. Mmm… She inhaled his clean scent.
“Kristen.” He turned his head away, kept his arms at his sides. “I don’t—”
“I know. I screwed up so many times.” She kissed down his neck to his collarbone and she felt him swallow. “But if you give me one more chance, I’ll make it up to you.”
He didn’t say anything and she raised to meet him and waited. She’d gotten used to his moments of silence before he spoke. She admired that he thought about things before he answered. It was not one of her talents.
He made a sound deep in his throat, cupped her face in his hands and lowered his mouth to hers. His lips moved over hers with strength and longing. Her nervousness melted away and her hands roamed to the back of his neck and crept into his hair. He pulled her closer and deepened the kiss and she whimpered, surrendering all.
But he stilled, his mouth leaving hers. His hands dropped and he reached up and took her hands off the back of his head.
“Luke, please.”
“Shh.” He stepped back, and kept backing up, leading her by her hands to the bedroom. “You had me with the grass skirt and the flower behind your ear.”
She smiled, only now realizing she’d forgotten to change from her work outfit. “You like hula girls, huh?”
“I like this hula girl.” His voice was low and soft.
The bedroom was even darker, which made it a little easier for Kristen to get through what she did next. Swaying her hips as she walked, she let go of his hands and slowly slipped her T-shirt off over her head. “Shall I leave the skirt on?”
The back of his legs bumped the end of the bed and he dropped down. “No.” He clutched her waist and pulled her between his thighs. “Don’t leave anything on.”
“Yes, sir.” She saluted, then hooked her thumbs into the band of the skirt and her panties at the same time, shoved them both down to her ankles and stepped out of them.
Immediately his hands wandered down her hips to her thighs, and around to her bottom. His mouth landed on her stomach and she gripped the back of his head. He continued running his hands down her thighs to behind her knees. Then up between her legs. With a bit of urging from him she brought one foot up to the bed beside him.
As his mouth and tongue caressed down her stomach into her blond curls, his fingers slid between her thighs and stroked her folds. He made sure to pause at her swollen clit and rub with just the right amount of pressure. With each stroke his speed increased until he finally slipped a finger inside her. She moaned and thought herself in heaven.
But Luke had only begun. His mouth replaced his thumb, leaving his fingers free to concentrate on the speed and depth of their thrusts.
Her hips pushed forward as he lathed and suckled, and she clutched his head as pleasure gave way to urgent need. Faster, harder, more. The sensation building, boiling… She threw her head back and cried out as the most exquisite, intense orgasm of her life shook her body.
Her knees buckled and she slumped in Luke’s arms. He caught her and rolled until she lay beneath him on the bed, her arms flung above her.
With one arm beneath her, he lightly trailed his fingers up and down her abdomen and pressed gentle kisses along the edge of her bra. He purposely hadn’t touched her breasts. Did he know and was avoiding them? How could he know? Maybe it was only because of her reaction the last time he’d tried. And he was letting her decide when to take that step.
Oh, Luke.
Drawing in a deep breath, she let it out on a sigh. She reached behind her, unhooked her bra and drew it off. Then she took his hand and hesitantly placed it over her right breast.
He cupped it and rubbed a finger over the nipple. His thumb curved beneath and his fingers curled around the side to cup it, then abruptly stilled.
Kristen squeezed her eyes closed, knowing what he felt. One scar ran around the nipple, and it was fairly tiny, but the other ran from under her arm to the underside of her reconstructed breast. Was he totally turned off now?
She felt his lips where his thumb had been, kissing down along her scar, and all the way around her breast. Then he caught her nipple and, though she couldn’t feel it, she watched as he teased it with his tongue and gently sucked. She wasn’t very big, but what she had, he lifted and kissed all around before cupping the left with his other hand and kissing between them, and across to her left breast.
She gasped and arched her back as he took her left nipple into his mouth. He flicked his tongue over the hardened, puckered tip and then drew it into his mouth tenderly. It was as if all the sensation she’d lost in her right nipple had transferred to her left. Tiny spasms rippled inside her. She writhed and moaned beneath him as he kissed her breast.
Tears she couldn’t stop slid down her temples.
He moved up and took her mouth in a kiss slow and deep while his hand caressed her breast. When he raised his head, his dark eyes studied her as he carefully swept a lock of hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. He traced the shell of her ear with one finger, and then brushed the back of his fingers across her cheek.
Finally his gaze returned to her eyes. His chest rose and fell, his skin warming hers where he lay alongside her. But he didn’t move otherwise. He truly was leaving each step of the lovemaking up to her. If only he knew how desperately she wanted him.
She planted a hand on his chest and pushed him to his back. The same hand ran down his muscled abs and over the zipper of his jeans. He grunted softly as she palmed his erection.
How patient he’d been with her, considering how rock hard he was. Carefully, she unbuttoned his jeans and slid the zipper down, pulling his briefs down along with them. He lifted his hips to allow her to tug them down, but snatched his wallet from the pocket before she yanked them all the way off.
When she returned her attention to his cock it stood straight up, the tip glistening. Other than running a hand along her spine, he lay st
ill and quiet, his other arm folded behind his head.
She glanced at him, wanting to see his face as she encircled his hard length. His eyes widened and then closed as she gripped him and stroked up and back down. His jaw shifted to the left. She pumped him again and then bent forward to take him inside her mouth. He gasped and his hand shot out to cup her cheek. She sucked hard, then released him and used her tongue to tease the head. Before she could take him inside her mouth again, he stopped her. “Wait.”
He opened his eyes and met her gaze, his brows lowered. “I’m not sure how long I can last.” His voice was rough, full of emotion.
She nodded.
He reached for his wallet, pulled out a condom and rolled it on. She straddled his thighs and massaged his chest, rubbing his flat nipples. Taking her time, she rose up on her knees, positioned him at her entrance and sank slowly down. He groaned, his hips lifting, his hands cupping and squeezing her breasts.
She rocked her hips and he groaned again. She was stretched so tight and filled so deeply. His thumbs rubbed across her nipples as he pushed inside her to her core and then pulled out and thrust again. He closed his eyes and stilled.
She wanted to watch him as he came. So she rose up and sank onto him, repeating the move, faster.
“Kristen.” His voice was strangled. His hands went to her waist to still her, but she rode him hard until his face creased and his jaw tightened. He let out a hoarse cry and his fingers dug into her waist.
As she watched him, ripples of pleasure multiplied and burst in a powerful climax. She fell on his chest and closed her eyes. His heart beat strong and fast beneath her ear. She quickly wiped a lone tear off her cheek before it landed on his heated skin.
So many emotions washed over her, overwhelmed her like giant waves tumbling her to shore. Relief was huge. Confidence and happiness filled her, too. She didn’t have to be afraid of sex anymore. But mostly she felt an abiding connection to Luke. Not just gratitude or admiration, although that was part of it. She felt a closeness to him she would never forget.
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