†
Clarissa’s heart clenched in pain at the look of horror on Jessica’s face. It was hard to believe that just over two hours ago, those grey eyes were looking at her with love. If only she could turn back time.
“I love you, Jess.” That was all she could think of saying, hoping, praying that it would make a difference.
The dark head moved from side to side, the grey eyes holding a haunted look.
“Please don’t say that. It’s … It’s … It makes me uncomfortable.” Clarissa closed her eyes to hide the pain she knew must show in them. Jessica didn’t want a monster to declare eternal love to her.
“I am sorry you feel that way, Jess. Maybe I should leave and let you process everything I have told you.” She slowly walked to the door, making sure not to make eye contact with Jessica, as she walked passed her. It would surely kill her if she had to see the look of horror in Jessica’s eyes again.
She reached out for the door handle, but her hand stopped mid-air. What was she doing? Walking away from Jessica at this moment was a stupid thing to do. If she left now, she’d only give Jessica the time and opportunity to make up more reasons not to give her a chance. She simply couldn’t leave Jessica now. She had tried it before and it almost killed her. She needed to see this through – even if it hurt like hell. She turned slowly and boldly met Jessica’s eyes.
“No. I will not leave you,” she said firmly, wondering at the same time if she was trying to convince Jessica or herself. She saw the confusion in Jessica’s eyes and swiftly closed the distance between them. She ignored the fact that Jessica looked like she was about to climb all over Gabriella in her state of terror.
“I love you too much to let you go without a fight.” She stepped even closer and gently brushed Gabriella aside. “I was a vampire when we met and first made love. I was a vampire when we fell in love with each other. I was a vampire last night when you fell asleep in my arms and I was holding you. If I had wanted to hurt you, did I not have more than ample opportunity to do just that?” With eyes burning intensely, she held out her hand. “You love me and I know you are strong enough to overcome your fear and give us a chance. You owe it to yourself to be loved and cherished the way I do.”
†
Jessica looked at the outstretched hand and back up into Clarissa’s eyes. As terrified as she was of what Clarissa represented, she couldn’t help but admit that she was right. She had fallen in love with Clarissa, the vampire, though she was not aware of that then. She had rolled around with her in a dark barn. She had slept in her arms afterward and then she …
“You did something to Greta, didn’t you?”
Dejected, Clarissa let her hand fall to her side.
“She did not want to take no for an answer,” she said curtly.
“What did you do to her, Clarissa? She was scared out of her mind. You didn’t… ” Jessica’s voice faded away, unable to voice the thought.
“I did not bite her. I simply planted an illusion in her head to scare her off.”
Clarissa stepped closer and Jessica quickly held up her hand to stop her movement.
“Please …”
“No, Jess, I will not give up on you. That first night with you … that was the most spectacular night I have ever had in over four hundred years.” Clarissa pushed her fingers through her hair. “I have been so lonely until you stumbled upon me in the graveyard at Cleaver Keep. I was waiting for dawn to break.” She quickly glanced at Gabriella. “I was going to end my existence.”
“Oh no … Clarissa,” Gabriella murmured as tears began to pour down her cheek. She gently cupped Clarissa’s cheek. “I didn’t know.”
Jessica, stunned by the admission, could only stare at the two women as they stood close, their bodies touching.
“No one was supposed to know.” Clarissa turned back to Jessica. “And then you came out of the dark and cast a bright light on me, on my burdened soul. I was spellbound. I followed you back to the castle and by the end of the night I knew I had to have you. Even if it was only for a few hours.”
Jessica remembered that night as if it happened only yesterday. It ran on a constant loop in her mind these past three years. She especially remembered the feeling of being followed from the graveyard. She looked at Clarissa and felt the burning sensation behind her eyes. Had I not gone to the graveyard at that moment, Clarissa would not be here now. What’s worse, she wouldn’t have known what it felt like to love the woman, to be angry with her and to be sad for her.
“Jessica,” Clarissa said in a broken whisper and reached out a shaking hand to brush her knuckles over Jessica’s cheek. “I fell in love with you the first time our lips met. It was the first time in four hundred years that I truly felt alive again.” This time a lone red tear streaked down Clarissa’s cheek and she squeezed her eyes tightly.
The room was as silent as a tomb, as Jessica, transfixed, watched the red tear trickle down Clarissa’s pale cheek until it disappeared down her neck. Humans didn’t cry blood tears. Clarissa stood there, vulnerable after her declaration of eternal love, shedding a single blood tear and awaiting condemnation. Jessica remembered a similar moment outside the restaurant. Surprising herself, she felt the same emotions from earlier surface, as she looked at Clarissa. It made Jessica wonder if it was possible that she could love this woman enough to try and give this a chance – give them a chance. A few minutes ago, she couldn’t stand to be in the same room with Clarissa, but now, all she wanted was to pull this broken creature against her heart and protect her.
This was Clarissa; the woman she had searched for for the past three years. The woman she loved and the woman who loved her back. The longer she looked at the crying blonde, the stronger she felt the urge to comfort her.
She cautiously stepped closer, her eyes taking in the blood-streaked face. She doubted if there would ever be a woman alive who would cry blood tears for her.
“It’ll be okay,” she whispered huskily. Clarissa slowly opened her eyes and more tears spilled over.
“Please, give us another chance. I will love you forever. I promise.”
The soft plea did her in and Jessica found herself in Clarissa’s arms. Her arms curled tightly around the vampire’s neck. Her grip tightened when she felt Clarissa’s body begin to tremble violently. They stood in silence, holding each other. Jessica was the first to break the embrace, as she stepped back and stared into Clarissa’s eyes. Their intensity almost blinded her. She slowly leaned forward and brushed her lips over Clarissa’s. The kiss lasted only a few seconds and when she pulled back, Clarissa still had her eyes closed. When they finally opened again, Jessica felt the air get stuck in her throat. She had never before been the recipient of such an exquisite look of adoration. Humbled, she shook her head in disbelief.
“How can you love me like this? Am I even worthy?” Her voice broke.
“Yes.” Clarissa said simply.
A soft sniffing sound made them both turn. Gabriella stood there with tears running down her cheeks.
“You have finally found the one, Jess,” she murmured through her tears.
Jessica looked back at Clarissa and found her staring back with a wondrous smile. She tightened her arm around the vampire’s waist.
“I guess I did.” She pressed another kiss on Clarissa’s smiling lips. She turned back to Gabriella. “No offense, but since when do you hang out with vampires?” She had meant for it to be a joke, but her question held genuine curiosity.
Gabriella smiled, held up her hand and walked over to the door. Trinity stood in the doorway, her green eyes anxiously running over Gabriella before she stepped forward and pulled her lover into her arms.
“I too, lost my heart to one,” Gabriella said in an awestruck voice.
Jessica’s eyes grew wide, as she looked from the embracing couple to a grinning Clarissa.
“It is a long story, my love,” Clarissa whispered.
“But … but I saw her … the sun …” She blushed at t
he amused look in the brown eyes.
“Vampire magic,” Gabriella said with a low chuckle and winked at Trinity, whose green eyes shone with love as looked at Gabriella.
“With you every day is magical.” The remark earned Trinity a deep, breath-taking kiss and Jessica couldn’t help but blink at the intimate interplay between the two women. There was definitely hope for her and Clarissa. Gabriella pulled away from Trinity and grinned.
“They are terribly romantic, Jess. Believe me when I tell you, you’re in for the ride of a lifetime.” She slipped her arm around the green-eyed vampire’s neck and flicked out her tongue to taste Trinity’s lips. “They’re exceptionally good in bed too, as you should know by now.”
Jessica blushed. Gabriella chuckled softly, as she pulled Trinity toward the door.
“We’ll find someplace else to crash tonight,” she threw over her shoulder. “The room is all yours. Make good use of it.”
The door clicked shut behind a chuckling Gabriella and Jessica slowly turned to Clarissa.
The brown eyes were dark with uncertainty.
Jessica swallowed. “I have to confess something” She saw Clarissa stiffen slightly. “I’m still rattled by your revelation and I don’t know how I will work through it all.” Clarissa’s jaw tightened. “But I will.” She placed a kiss on Clarissa’s lip, feeling the blonde relax almost immediately. She looked at the window. It was still dark outside. Feeling the exhaustion of the day creeping up on her, she glanced longingly at the bed. “Shall we lie down for a moment, before you have to leave?”
“Leave?” Clarissa echoed with a puzzled look.
“You know … vampire … dawn … all that stuff.” Jessica was looking anywhere but at Clarissa, and she jumped slightly when she felt the soft touch on her cheeks.
“Look at me, beloved.”
Jessica almost smiled at the sound of the old-fashioned endearment; charmed beyond words. Yes, she was Clarissa’s beloved, and no one else would ever call her that. She turned her head to look into the tender, dark gaze.
“I understand how confusing and scary the idea is to you, but I want you to talk to me. I need to know, because I need to help you through this. You are willing to give us a chance and I want to bring my side too.” She slowly traced Jessica’s jawline with her finger. “But to answer you, it is still very early, but yes, I will have to leave for my liar in a few hours.” She grinned. “Thank you for reminding me.”
Jessica grinned back. “Then we don’t have much time to waste, now do we?” She sauntered over to the bed and threw back the bedding. “There is so much I want to know about you.”
Warily, Clarissa approached the bed, her eyes very dark.
“Some of the things I have to tell you might change your opinion of me.” She closed her eyes tightly. “I am scared you might change your mind about us.”
Jessica held her arms open and Clarissa walked into them.
“Let me be the judge of that, okay? Just be honest and don’t hold back anything.”
Clarissa nodded, but sensing a slight tension in the vampire, Jessica decided on a lighter introduction for their first discussion. “Let’s start with the way you talk. It’s so formal.”
Clarissa shrugged. “We were not born in the time of contractions. Nor do we engage with a lot of humans besides the ones who work with us. They are all used to the way we speak.”
Jessica lay back on the bed and held out her hand to Clarissa.
“Didn’t you ever want to learn how to speak like us?”
Clarissa lay down next to Jessica. “I do not think so. It never crossed my mind that I would fall in love with a human.”
Jessica rolled over until she was hoisted on her elbow and looking down at Clarissa. “I must admit, I find the way you talk quite charming.”
As the night advanced, Jessica gently and carefully eased Clarissa into the more grim topics she knew the vampire wasn’t all that comfortable discussing.
Chapter 10
A husky, drawn-out gasp and the rapid slapping of skin on skin broke the thick, sexually-charged atmosphere in the room. Glazed, tawny eyes stared into scorching ever-greens.
“Yessss … just like that, baby. Just like … that!”
A deep growl sounded in the room, followed by a high pitched scream.
“Ah, honey … that was spectacular.”
Lifting her weight onto strong arms, Trinity gently withdrew from Gabriella’s body and rolled over onto her back. She felt Gabriella’s hands working the leather fastenings at her hips and removing the dildo. With a deep sigh, she welcomed Gabriella’s sweaty body back into her arms.
“You are a great inspiration, my angel,” Trinity whispered into Gabriella’s hair.
“Good answer, honey.”
There was a short silence.
“What are you thinking about?”
Trinity lifted her head and stared into the amber eyes.
“I’m thinking about us.”
“What about us, my love.”
Brushing a kiss against the soft lips, Gabriella closed her eyes. “Just how lucky we are to be together and to love each other.”
The green eyes carefully traced the beautiful face, trying to determine her lover’s mood and the direction of the conversation.
“Yes, we are.”
Amber eyes opened and locked with jade ones. “Seeing Jess and Rissa together tonight, it struck me how precious our love is.” A soft hand cupped the cheek of the vampire. “What if things go wrong with Mary and they never get the chance to experience what we have?”
The green eyes softened. “Your mother will not allow anything to happen to either of them nor any of us for that matter.” She brushed the sweaty bangs out of Gabriella’s eyes. “Is that really all that bothers you?”
Gabriella’s eyes darkened.
“Not really.”
“Then talk to me, baby. Maybe I can help.”
Gabriella sighed deeply and pressed her ear against her lover’s thudding heart. How would she go on if this beautiful heart stopped beating one day? She was scared of a lot of things, but losing Trinity terrified her.
“I just want you to be safe, that’s all.”
Trinity moaned softly, as she held Gabriella tightly against her chest.
“I do not plan on dying now that I’ve found you, Gaby. Believe me when I say that I am vigilant all the time.”
“Good,” came the muffled reply. “I will hold you to that.”
†
Jessica stirred when she felt Clarissa gently extracting herself from her arms.
“It’s time for me to go … do what vampires do.”
Jessica nodded; her expression solemn. “You have to go feed?”
Clarissa nodded as she zipped up her jacket.
“I will not be long though.”
Jessica sat up, her eyes burning into Clarissa’s. “Why don’t you …”
Clarissa shook her head vehemently. “No!”
Jessica slowly crept over the wide expanse of the bed until she was kneeling in front of where Clarissa stood. The brown eyes were cool as they looked at her.
“What is the difference, Clarissa, taking blood from a random stranger or taking blood from me?”
The vampire’s eyes were flooded with a variety of emotions, the most discernible, guilt.
“I love you, but that doesn’t mean that you will have to sate my cursed hunger too.” Her voice sounded distracted, as if she was trying to distance herself from the discussion. They looked at each other in silence until Clarissa looked away.
“That’s where you are wrong.” The sienna eyes turned back to her. “Because I love you, I have to take care of you and you of me. Offering you my blood should not simply be seen as an act of sating your hunger, but as an act of love. By the way, I hate the idea of you nuzzling strangers’ necks.”
Clarissa was staring at her with wide eyes and Jessica was pleasantly surprised when the normally somber vampire unexpectedly burst out l
aughing.
“You have no idea how unpleasant it is to suck on someone’s neck while the overpowering smell of perfume threatens to knock you out.” She reached out and ran her knuckles over Jessica’s cheek. “You are simply amazing. I am so lucky to own your heart.”
Jessica smiled. “Think about it. For today I will let you get away with it, but next time …”
“Thank you, darling. I will consider your offer, but we still need to discuss it more.”
The grey eyes sparkled. “What’s there to talk about? You bite and suck and I maintain my ideal weight.”
Clarissa’s jaw dropped and Jessica doubled over with laughter. Clarissa shook her head and sat on the bed next to the guffawing Jessica. It took a while before Jessica calmed down; moist eyes looked up at the faintly amused gaze of Clarissa.
“We’ll have to work on your sense of humor, dear.”
Clarissa chuckled softly. “I do not know if I will be using it a lot, but you can try.”
Jessica grinned and climbed onto the vampire’s lap, her eyes staring deep into the gentle ones.
“Kiss me and go do your thing.” As an afterthought she added, “No women though.”
Meekly Clarissa nodded and did as she was told.
By the time Clarissa left the room, Jessica was lying on her back, her eyes closed and her body still numb from the breath-taking kiss. She slowly opened her eyes and blinked rapidly. She rolled onto her stomach and buried her face in the pillow Clarissa had used. Her thoughts immediately going back to the discussion they’d had earlier.
It was agonizing for her to listen as Clarissa talked about her life in captivity. The brown eyes were dark with pain as she told her about Mary’s cruelty. She had held Clarissa close as the vampire recalled the horrifying moments when she had unintentionally killed hundreds of innocent people, desperate to sate her hunger. She remembered holding the trembling body as the incidents came and went, adding up to a staggering number of slaughters in the end.
The only way she could reach Clarissa afterward was to gently reassure the blonde that she loved her and that nothing would change that. The brown eyes had slowly lost their cold, distant look as she’d stared into them until, in the end, they simply looked at her in wonder. They had held each other until the prevailing silence lulled Jessica into a short nap.
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