by Janeal Falor
“Leave them,” I call.
“Just shielding your backs,” he calls back as he darts behind us to join Chadwick in facing down our foes.
Ignoring my wavering, Lukas pulls me forward, putting me in front of him. At this point, it feels like running is the only thing I should be doing, but with each step, guilt jolts through me. Crimson and gray spells flash around us, proving running is the right thing to do, but also meaning I’m leaving others to face what’s meant for me.
Lukas puts a hand to my back, pushing me on.
“Wait. I have to help. I can.” I lift my hand and start to turn, but he grabs my wrist and ushers me on.
“They’re following.”
I glance over my shoulder to see that Chadwick and Conrad are retreating, but the attackers are following with a flurry of reds, yellows, and bright greens. We’re going to die.
“Get in.” Lukas shoves me in the carriage before I’ve had a chance to realize we’ve come to it, the door slamming closed behind me. Moments later, we’re off, my heart frantic to beat out of my chest. Now that we’ve got horses on our side, I’m sure we can outrun them, but Chadwick and Conrad? Are they going to make it?
An amber spell smashes against the one-sided window with a pop. Suddenly the door is on fire. Someone screams. When I realize that someone is me, I snap my mouth shut, cover my hand with my sleeve, and kick at the bottom of the door that hasn’t caught on fire yet.
It thuds and cracks against my attack but doesn’t give way. The carriage has stopped, the air filling with smoke. I sit on the floor, bracing myself against the sidewall and kick as hard as I can. The smoke seems to be sucking my energy out along with my air. It’s hot. Choking hot.
Is Lukas trying to help from the outside, or has some other spell attacked him? The thought makes me kick harder even as the flames lick closer to me. The bottom of my skirt catches fire, pain searing my lower legs. Can’t give in.
I kick again, thrusting both feet out as hard as I can. The door crumbles open, the flames roaring higher with the new air, stealing it all. I jump from the inferno and run. Everything hurts like I’m still next to the flames. Then I realize I’m on fire.
Suddenly someone pushes me to the ground, smothering me, smacking at the flames still flickering across me. Pain racks through me, my vision going dark. Then the weight lifts from me, my body slowly cooling, taking the aching with it.
Opening my eyes, I find I’m encompassed by a blue spell cast by Lukas who's hovering over me. Another moment, and I’m feeling almost, but not quite, like myself, and the spell stops.
“Than—” Before I finish, he slumps to the ground. “Lukas!”
“Fine.” His voice is faint. “Tired.”
Chadwick is there, lifting Lukas as Conrad pulls me to my feet, his hand firm on mine. “We have to go. We’ve cut them off, but it won’t last.”
With Chadwick carrying Lukas, there’s nothing left to stop me from running.
***
“I hope there are no further plans of me going out before the tournament,” I say.
“Definitely not.” Lukas says as he reclines on a couch, eyelids drooping.
“It is a good thing there are still two more days, or you wouldn’t have enough time to regain your strength.” I lightly brush my hand against his. “Thank you. For saving me and healing me.”
He clasps a hold of my hand with a grip that’s firm and reassuring, I wouldn’t know he was so exhausted if he wasn’t lying before me half awake. “I shouldn’t have taken you in the first place.”
“No, you were right to take me. I don’t feel as anxious about going to the tournament now, and no one was hurt. If anything, we know they are still out there, keeping too close an eye on us. I just wish I knew who attacked. Do you think they are watching the house?”
“We’ve searched a lot, both physically and with spells, but haven’t found anything. Seems likely, though.” He closes his eyes, and I drop his hand, even though he tries to take it back.
“I should let you rest.”
“Probably, but one more thing, and don’t be upset about it. Just learn from it.” Lukas takes a deep breath before continuing. “That would have been a good time to cast a spell.”
“Blast it all! I will never learn.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Everything up until the last few weeks has been to hide magic. You’ll learn how to let it out.”
Maybe, but with the tournament so close, there isn't time. The next opportunity I have to go to the tournament grounds will be to show everyone what I can do. And possibly die for it. Seeing how I almost died today, that possibility has grown all too likely.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
“Councilman Daniel, good to see you.” Zade’s words draw me to the entrance to find not only the councilman, but his wife, Annabelle, and Katherine.
“Katherine! Annabelle!” I wrap them both in hugs. My loud exclamations bring the girls from all around the house down as well.
Soon the entrance is alive with chatter and excitement. Finally, mother sneaks in long enough to say, “I’m certain our guests don’t wish to make their entire visit in the hall.”
The girls immediately quiet and line themselves along the hall wall. The thought sends a pinch through me from all of the times we were trained to calm ourselves before father scolded us. Or worse, being caught doing something that required scolding.
The thought quickly passes as Waverly ushers the youngest girls back toward the playroom, and Serena leads our guests to the receiving room.
Before I follow the others in, Katherine stops me by putting a large bundle in my hands. “Your clothes for the tournament. A good variety for you to pick from. We can size them before I go, but I’m sure they’ll all fit.”
I squeeze the bundle closer to me. “They’ll be perfect.”
“You haven’t even seen them yet.”
“But you always come through.”
“One of these days, I may disappoint you.”
“Unlikely,” I counter. “But if you did, I’m sure you’d find a brilliant fix for it in no time at all.”
She laughs. “You’re too nice. Sadly, though, I can’t stay for the beginning of the tournament. Hopefully, I can return to watch it sometime toward the end.”
The purple glow of her tattoos suddenly looks sinister. Blast the council. “I understand and will be happy to see you when you make it,” I say. “I’ll be in as soon as I put these away.”
“See you soon.”
I take my things and head to my room, wondering what marvels she’s tucked in this package for me. It’s been hard being here and not seeing her as much. I miss her.
“That girl sure is sweet.” Mother’s voice makes me stop. She’s standing just inside the last door I passed, the door to her room.
“She is.”
I linger, wondering if there’s something more, but not knowing what to say. Suddenly, mother says, “Your baby sister is kicking. I think she's the most active yet. Would you like to feel it?”
The package in my hands seems like a very good excuse not to. Although she always seems to be pregnant, I’ve never felt one of the babies move before. I’ve never done anything with them until they were old enough to be weaned. Bethany and mother always took care of them before that.
“Do you miss father?” The words blurt out before I realized my thoughts were traveling there. Why would I ask her such a thing? Why do I even care? Our lives are so much better without him around.
She looks at some point far past me. “I don’t know if miss is the right word for it.”
I move closer to her, leaning against the doorframe. “What do you mean?”
“Almost my entire adult life, he’s been around. That’s the way it was supposed to be. Me obeying his every whim. When your sister gained her freedom and first became our owner, I was so lost. I didn’t know what to do. Not having your father around to punish anyone was a blessing.”
“Very much so.
”
“Yet, you must admit it was odd.”
A deep, grating sort of exhaustion pulls through me. “It is still odd without him sometimes. But I wouldn’t want him here.”
“No, none of us want that.” But her voice sounds as heavy as I feel. “Sometimes I just wonder where he is, what he’s doing. I still find myself thinking on what chores I need to complete for him. Things I’d still be doing if Serena wasn’t our owner.”
I rub my ring. “Are you upset she’s your owner?”
“Not upset. Just worried.” Her hand presses tightly on her belly.
“And what I’m doing, does that worry you?”
“Of course it does. Everyone seems to think it will be all right, though. Zade has us well protected.” The fondness in her voice when she says his name is unmistakable. His presence probably has done more for changing mother’s attitude than having father gone.
“You know, I could teach you a spell or two.”
Her face goes pale, but she recovers quickly. “And you could feel your baby sister kicking.”
I’d rather go practice more even though it feels as if I’ve done nothing but practice. I never deal with the babies when she carries them. Still, if she needs to see me be brave to do the same in return…
I reach my hand out. A jab pops out of her belly before I even reach it, making my hand dart back. “Uh. I don't think she’s ready to say hello yet.”
Mother laughs. “She’s probably just so excited to hear your voice she can’t contain herself.”
Can she hear my voice? Has she heard what I’m trying to do for women? For her? Not that she would understand it, but when mother’s belly shifts again, it doesn’t make me want to run down the hall like before. After placing my package on the floor, I slowly reach forward and hover my hand over mother’s belly. She reaches up and presses it firmly against her stomach, just in time for a swift kick to my palm.
I laugh, but let my hand fall back to my side. “She really is eager for something.”
“Most active of you girls yet, that’s for certain.”
I pick up my package and step back into the hall. “So when can I teach you a spell?”
She simply smiles and retreats into her room. Guess I shouldn’t expect too much progress in one conversation. Still, it’s something. I understand her a little better now. And my sister. That push against my hand wasn’t like I expected it to be. The thrill was almost exciting rather than scary.
That sister, she’s going to be the first born under Serena’s ownership. If everything goes well, the first to know, from birth, that women can do magic. What will become of a female who knows their worth and what they are capable of?
Chapter Thirty
It’s still dark when I leave the house. Lukas left earlier this morning to make certain things are going well. And they are, a little too well. We’ll not be able to take the carriage all the way to the grounds because of how busy it already is. My skirts are full, swishing around my legs as I get in the carriage. A new one with no spelled window for me to see out. No matter. I suppose I could fix it, but the dark is familiar. No sense rattling my already withered nerves.
The carriage moves, the sound of horses clopping filling the air. While many of the guards are staying to protect the girls, and others are going with Bethany and Serena, several are accompanying me. I grip my skirt the entire way, too much like Serena, but this is it. This is the day.
My stomach feels like revolting, also like Serena. I’m glad I left before she or the others could see me off. Things are frayed enough without having to hide more emotions from them as well. Each bump or dip of the carriage is another step closer to my doom or salvation, yet all I want to do is stay in this carriage. Never leave its dark confines.
All too soon the carriage stops. There’s chatter outside but not close by. A few moments later, the carriage door opens. My hands grip my seat as if that’s enough to keep me here, but of course my own will power and desires propel me, even if I’m having a hard time remembering what desires those are. Chadwick, Xyer, and Conrad are in a semi-circle around me.
“Where’s Lukas? I thought he was to meet us here.”
Chadwick glances around as if simply looking for him will make him appear.
“I’m certain he’ll be along shortly,” Xyer says.
“Right.” I guess it’s time, then.
I pry my hands from the seat and step from the carriage. My black skirt swishes around me, loose enough I can move easily, but full enough to hide a gun if I choose to carry one. It feels so useless today though. The blouse I'm wearing is also black to conform with tournament dress code. Despite the dark color, it's light and smooth against my skin. It's tucked into my skirt and draping down my arms to allow for full control of my arms without getting tangled. The only part of my outfit uncomfortable is the orange band I must wear denoting my country. Katherine has done wonderfully as usual. Still, I'd rather be wearing breeches.
They follow as I head toward the grounds, Conrad close by, while Xyer and Chadwick spread out. Others are about, but not as close as I thought, and are quickly leaving us behind. No sense tainting themselves by arriving when I do.
Perhaps I should have waited for Lukas before starting my walk of doom. He should have been here. If something happened to him—no, I won’t think such thoughts. He’s probably just running behind on one of the most important days of our lives. At least I can find out not only when my duels are, but his as well, in case whatever is keeping him continues until it’s almost time to start. I’m sure it’s nothing.
The air around me swirls, brushing against my skin with a chilly bite that feels menacing. Almost like something is there besides just air. Like someone is watching me. Waiting for me to stop, or slow down, or take the wrong turn so they can make it so I don’t show up for the tournament. Even with my guards here, it doesn’t feel like enough. I increase my pace until I’m running. The air whips past my skin, chilling my already cold skin further.
“Is everything all right?” Chadwick says in between breaths as he runs up beside me.
“I don’t know.”
He glances around and asks Conrad, “What do you think?”
“I’ll check the area. You three go ahead, and move fast.”
He stops running and spells fly from him, zipping off in all directions. Chadwick and I turn back toward the grounds and run again. Where is everyone? Did they run off because of me, or do they know something we don’t?
Chills want to cripple me, to keep me from moving forward, but I force myself on. My lungs burn as my feet crunch against the road. We dip into an alley, a shortcut, but the houses press in on me from both sides. If anyone should come, there’s only one way out. If more people come, blocking both sides, we’re trapped.
I push myself harder. We’re almost there. Just a little farther and we’ll make it. There are people in the distance, wandering on the field where we’ll join the tournament. Not much farther. I bound out of the alley into a clearing. The panicked fear gripping me on the run is immediately replaced with something much more certain. I’ve arrived. I’ll sign in, check the list of competitors, and will soon be competing. As much as my nerves are tumbling around my insides, churning things about, I force my outward appearance to be cool and calm, as if this is common-place and accepted.
Several groups of people, mostly men but a few women, are scattered throughout, though none close to us. They’re all staring at me. I pretend like my running turned to a stroll was all part of the plan. What plan, I have no idea, but people who duel in tournaments must have a plan, yes? Like warming up or something, not that I got scared on the way over. What a way for me to introduce myself to everyone, to show even more how I don’t belong.
As we drift through the clearing, the attention leaves us. It’s hard not to think, and worry, about Lukas. Any moment he should be joining us, but there’s no sign of him. I glance to where a few duelers are already signing in. The gate in the fence di
viding the duelers from the spectators is guarded by a fierce warlock, dark, stringy hair down to his shoulders, with a nose so hooked I can see it from here as he scowls at the warlock currently trying to check in.
The worry in my chest suddenly feels tighter, strangling my ability to breathe. But this is what I came for. What I’ve trained for. I need to do this. To be strong and show everyone my magic.
We head toward the gate but then stop. Chadwick and Xyer have been nothing but helpful. They’ve saved my life. I want them to come. To support me. But having warlocks around while trying to sign in feels like it goes against what I’m trying to accomplish. I need to do this on my own. Dread flashes through me. I hate when the right thing to do is also the hardest thing to do.
“I’m going to go sign in. Would you mind letting me do it on my own?”
“No problem,” Chadwick says. “I’ll be back here but still making sure your safe.”
Some of the dread eases from me, just not nearly enough of it. “Thank you. And if you see Lukas, will you let him know where I am?”
“Will do.”
After thanking him again, I stride toward the admitting gate, pretending like I’m not covered in fear. Thankfully there’s not a line, the warlock who was signing in a moment ago is walking through the gate now. Maybe it’s worse. It means I’ll have to face him now without having more time to think on what to say. Once there, a stringy-haired law officer stops me, a gap between his front teeth visible now that I’m closer.
“Where are you going? Where’s your owner? Why are you dressed in black with an arm band?” he snaps.
The rapid questions mixed with his presence leaning toward me, hand up, ready to cast a spell makes me want to run all the way back to the house.
I straighten and in my most commanding voice, learned from father, I say, “I’m participating in the tournament. See this?” I point to the orange band on my arm. “You know it means I am a participant.”
He shrugs. “You could have stolen it.”