Which seemed to be the story of my life. Nick had said a lot of things, but he still hadn't said that. The lack of those particular words from Nick left a gaping big hole in my newly rediscovered heart. But it didn't stop me from loving him back. Or from being petrified of this realisation, of finally facing this truth after eight years, and then have it all taken from me by the Russells.
All my growing years Levi and his brothers had tormented me. Taking anything good I managed to acquire for myself and wrecking it completely, just because they could. My guitar was the only thing they didn't destroy - and I was thinking now that was due to my Dad - but although they didn't destroy it, they broke it frequently. Coming as close to trashing it as they could, but not crossing the line. Until my Martin almost three weeks ago.
I was sure Levi gained an enormous amount of pleasure out of finally demolishing the one thing he'd not been able to wreck when we were young. A poignant moment for him no doubt. One for the scrapbook. But even though he'd never been able to completely annihilate my guitar all those years ago, he'd certainly done his best with everything else. Clothes, books, my pathetic clingfilm wrapped lunch, my face, my friends. Even boyfriends were subjected to the Russell boys' welcome. Nothing was sacred - except, it seems, my guitar - if Levi saw I had something precious, even if I tried to pretend it wasn't, he'd destroy it in ten seconds flat.
He lacked finesse, but his aim was always true.
And now I was going back to face him. To face the past I had escaped. And it scared me. It made my throat dry and my palms sweat. But, I was ready. I had no idea what I would do, but I was ready to do it all the same.
First Dad. Then Levi and his family.
Then perhaps Nick. If Nick truly felt the same way and said the words my heart longed to hear.
Somehow, through all of these fearful thoughts, I found sleep. Only to have Cary wake us both with gentle shakes and muted words of, "Rise and shine, sleeping beauties. You've got a plane to catch."
I grumbled as I rolled out of bed, noticing our naked states that my best friend would have been quite aware of as the sheets were down wrapped around our hips. I'm sure he enjoyed the view of Nick lying there, for a few seconds I certainly did. When Nick's sleep deprived eyes found mine I almost sighed. But hid the reaction by bending over and sweeping up my scattered clothes and heading to the bathroom to wake up.
Twenty minutes later and we were ready. My bags stacked at the front door. My old Fender in its sticker covered and battered case. My cowgirl hat in my hand and my heart in my throat. I blinked a few times as I took in the lounge room one last time. Nick was carrying my bags out to Cary's car, he'd only brought an overnighter, so my gear would take up most of our shared baggage allowance and some. Forcing back tears I prepared to follow him, but Cary snagged an arm around my waist.
"Sweetie," he whispered. "You'll be back for holidays. I'll be over before you know it too. This is not good-bye, Eva, but 'so long for now' instead."
I hugged my best friend fiercely, holding back the tears somehow. Nick came back in the room, took us both in; arms tightly curled around each other, and quietly picked up my last bag and the guitar case and walked back out to the car. By the time Cary and I heard the boot of his car slamming shut, we were sniffing repeatedly. But I can proudly say neither of us were bawling at least.
The drive to the airport was filled with Cary's usual upbeat conversations about anything and everything and nothing at all. And at the airport we convinced him to drop us and run. He had to work today and he'd barely had any more sleep than us. But that wasn't the reason I insisted he leave. I knew if he stayed and I walked away from him through that departure gate, I would cry.
Cowgirls don't cry.
Last minute hugs, overly cheerful farewells and we were alone. Nick held my hand through the entire check-in, through the walk to the departure area and to our gate, and finally when we boarded the plane. Neither of us spoke and when a single tear escaped from under my eyelid as the plane lifted off from the ground, he simply reached over and caught it with his thumb, but didn't make a sound.
Nashville faded beneath the aeroplane’s wings. Beautiful, bustling, full of Country music and life. It would always hold a special place in my heart and I told myself, that this was not the end. Cary was right, I'd be back to visit, but my life now - my heart - was somewhere else.
We did manage to sleep on the flight, despite there being so much to worry about, so much uncertainty ahead, I fell asleep with my head on Nick's shoulder and his arm wrapped around my back and let my body, at least, prepare for the nightmare ahead.
Just over twenty odd hours later we were home. Auckland putting on a dazzling display of early morning sunshine, the sun rising over the horizon and bathing the city in an orange glow. My heart skipped a beat at the glorious sight that met us. The Sky Tower in the distance standing sentinel above the CBD. Somewhere in its shadow lay Sweet Seduction and the thought of the music-store-come-chocolatier-come-café made me smile. I'd wanted to be able to call it my place, to be as familiar there as most of those who attended our gig seemed to be. I'd been jealous of the fact that Gus, Gonzo and Spike could do that and that I couldn't. But now, watching the tip of the Sky Tower disappear as the plane lowered in the sky, lining up the runway, I realised things had changed.
Sweet Seduction could be part of my life now. Gen, Kelly, even Katie, Nick's sister, could all be a part of it too. I had made more friends in the short amount of time having visited Sweet Seduction, than I had made in the entire eight years of living in Nashville. Suddenly coming home to Auckland, despite the problems that lay ahead, seemed inordinately right.
Ben met us at the arrivals terminal, dressed in black, ASI paraphernalia gracing his thick black leather belt, a duffel bag lying beside his slightly scuffed thick soled boots. Nick met him with a tilt of his chin and automatically reached down for the bag as Ben offered me a kiss on the cheek in greeting. I watched in stunned silence as Nick geared up, in full sight of passers-by. His stun gun, taser, handcuffs, pepper spray and already holstered black matt pistol all threaded meticulously onto his belt. He hadn't even waited to exit the airport before arming himself to the teeth.
"Is that really necessary?" I asked as I furtively looked around for airport security to accost us for displaying weapons so freely in the terminal.
Nick didn't answer, but Ben - who I realised had been standing in a way so as to shield Nick from most of the public's view - did.
"Security is aware we're here, Eva. They know what we do, we've worked with them before. And yes, it's necessary."
My stomach pitched dramatically at the look Ben gave me. A meaningful glance to convey the truth of his words. I held his gaze for a moment and then automatically looked down at the floor, frown in place.
"Just what do you expect will happen?" I asked the linoleum at my feet.
"Were you followed?" Nick asked Ben instead of answering my question.
Ben snorted in disgust. "As if."
"There's your answer, angel," Nick said lacing his hand in mine and leaning forward to kiss me on the side of the neck. "Ben's good at what he does, no one will know you're here because of him. But your family will have been made aware of it as soon as we walked through that arrivals gate. They have access to the network and although they won't be able to get here in time to intercept us, they could locate us as we leave south Auckland and head to ASI HQ."
"Network?" I asked as we started heading out of the terminal building, Ben pushing our luggage trolley and alertly looking all around, as Nick held my hand firmly and scanned the environment right alongside his employee.
"The underworld, the underbelly of criminal society in Auckland. The Russell's are two-bit players, not entrenched in the scene too deeply, but they are on radar and have been known to associate with some of the big guns. Namely Declan King and his cohorts. If they've done King any favours lately, they'd be able to call them in to keep tabs on you."
My mind reeled a
t that knowledge. Nick had mentioned that he'd put me on radar when I arrived back in town, but he hadn't said anything about Levi and his brothers being on radar before. Was it the same radar? Did this Declan King character know all about me too? Did being on radar mean every Tom, Dick and Harry knew all about you?
"One day you're gonna explain what being on radar actually means," I muttered as he held the door open to a black SUV we'd arrived at and I climbed inside.
"It's pretty simple, angel," Nick said, leaning in the door, one arm along the top of the door frame, the other hanging onto the roof of the car itself. "There's two ways you're on radar. One. You break the law and mess with criminals. Two. The law's trying to protect you and keep tabs on your status through its own network of contacts."
"So, they're not the same radar?" I asked, frowning in concentration.
"They are and they aren't," he said obscurely. "Can't not be as both the underworld and us use the same contacts for the most part, but the outcome is entirely different. Us placing you on radar does not bring you under King's - or anyone like his - eyes. Only if he's looking for you in the first place. But in order for us to have an ear to the ground in organized crime we need to get dirty to do it. Using radar is a dirty business, but without it we'd be blind."
He shut the door then, leaving me to wonder just what sort of world Nicholas Anscombe traversed and how the hell I got mixed up in it.
Nick and Ben talked the entire trip into Newmarket and the ASI offices. Their conversation - for the most part - was all gobbledygook. Short sentences, acronyms and abbreviations that meant little or nothing to me, as Ben brought Nick up to date on what had happened since he left the country to track me down. I stared out of the window in the rear seat of the car and watched the city I now called home pass by.
So familiar yet so different from what I was used to. I missed Nashville already and craved Cary like a kid craves her next sugar fix. If Cary was here this would all seem like a walk in the park, but now I just had me to rely on. My eyes flicked up to the front of the vehicle and took in Nick's profile as he sat in the passenger seat looking across the cab to Ben, who was still talking in that clipped way the ASI guys get when on the job. I guessed I had Nick to lean on now too, but a part of me, so long ago forged and hard to break now, wouldn't allow myself to walk that path just yet.
If the Russells succeeded in ruining this for me - and that was still an enormous possibility, given their less than pristine backgrounds - I needed to keep some distance and relying on Nick for support wouldn't achieve that. Darn it all to hell, it would achieve the exact opposite. I couldn't allow that.
I took a deep breath and watched Broadway flash past as we approached the ASI building. A thought occurred to me.
"Won't the underworld be watching your offices?" I asked, interrupting the conversation up front.
"Yes," Nick answered succinctly.
"Then isn't it a bad idea to be heading there?" I asked the obvious. I thought they wanted to keep me out of the Russell's clutches, heading to ASI where eyes would be peeled didn't seem like a good idea.
"No," Nick offered, but didn't elaborate. The conversation picked up in the front again as though I hadn't asked a pertinent question at all.
I frowned down at the floor of the car. The sound of tyres squealing on the smooth concrete floor of the underground garage at ASI broke into my contemplations. Nick had something planned that he didn't want to share and although every gut instinct in my body screamed for me to challenge him on it, I reluctantly acknowledged that he knew more about this type of thing than I ever could.
Did I trust him? Absolutely. At least I trusted him in this regard. Maybe they had traps set for any Russell that turned up here coming after me. Maybe they knew there was no chance of anyone breaking through ASI's security here at their HQ. Maybe he was using me as bait in an effort to catch the bad guys and end this once and for all.
That last thought was unwelcome and also didn't sound entirely right. Nick had done nothing but protect me since he'd walked back in my life, I was quite sure he wasn't about to stop now.
So, he had a plan. I trusted him enough to carry it out with minimal harm to me. And the bottom line was, this needed to be sorted. The Russells couldn't be left to do what they pleased and the threat of that hanging over me had to be removed - one way or another.
I climbed out of the car and started to follow Ben towards the internal door to the lift inside. Nick snagged my hand before I'd made it two steps, then wrapped his arm around my shoulder, leaning his face into the curve of my neck.
"Not gonna ask, angel?" he said with obvious amusement in his tone.
"Ask what?" I shot back, knowing full well what he was talking about.
"Don't think I'm setting you up as bait?" he offered innocently.
I flicked my gaze towards him, my eyes meeting the ice-blue, crinkle edge of his.
"Nah, cowboy. I trust you."
He stopped in his tracks, which made me stop as well, as his arm was firmly wrapped around me still. I'd returned my line of sight face-forward again, but at the abrupt halt, shifted my gaze back towards Nick. He looked a little shocked, his eyes blinked rapidly a couple of times, then swept over my face swiftly, trying to take me all in.
"You mean that?" he asked softly. I nodded, unable to voice any words under that intense winter-blue gaze. "You've no idea what that means to me, angel," he whispered, leaning forward and brushing his lips against mine in an only slightly-less-than-heated caress.
A clearing of a throat stopped the kiss from deepening further - and it had been deepening.
"You guys wanna carry that on inside the offices where security is tighter?" Ben suggested from over at the door. Nick slowly pulled back from the kiss, but didn't look at his guy, his eyes were still devouring my face. "Besides," Ben added, obviously thinking he needed to offer further incentive to make us move, "Eric will be makin' sure the boys get an eyeful of all of this in control. No doubt it'll go up on the board. Wanna give 'em more ammunition, boss?"
My face heated up with a blush and I watched Nick's eyes trail the reddening of my cheeks as a small smirk graced his kiss swollen lips. I started to tip my head forward, to stare at the ground, frown no doubt already in place, but Nick stopped the movement with his fingers on my chin. Then his lips hovered over mine, hot breath washing against them as he gruffly said, "Let 'em," then kissed me like there was no tomorrow.
"Fuck!" I heard Ben mutter, but was barely aware of what he did then, too wrapped up in Nick's tongue and teeth and mouth to contemplate concentrating on anything else.
Somehow Ben corralled us into the lift, but Nick didn't stop kissing me until the doors closed softly behind us with a muted snick.
"Remind me to give you a pay-rise at your next performance review," Nick said conversationally as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and turned to face Ben.
"Better fuckin' believe it. Your head is scrambled, e hoa."
"Not gonna fucking argue with you there. But, Ben?" Nick's ice-blue eyes met the dark chocolate ones of Ben's across the lift cage. "It's fucking worth it, my friend."
Ben started laughing, a deep rumbling sound from within his chest, just as the doors slid open to reveal ASI's reception area in all its sleek glass and steel furnishings, polished tiled floor and red and black colours. It screamed masculinity with bold lines and harsh angles. If it was meant as a representation of those who worked here, I was betting the interpretation was one of shock and awe. Hard working, smooth talking, straight shooting men. I liked it.
The desk was manned this time; a small rotund older looking woman, who was surely someone's cuddly grandmother and most definitely looked out of place in the slick environment of the ASI reception. I couldn't quite align her homely cardigan and plaid below the knee skirt with the gun-slinging, bad-boys of ASI. I wondered if they chose her as their receptionist to placate would-be clients when they first plucked up courage to seek a PI.
Then she opene
d her mouth and removed all images of sweet, old grandma soothing scrapes and bruises with a gentle hand and kind words.
"Nicholas Anscombe, where the fuck have you been? Don't you realise there's eight different cases on right now, one of which requires Ben's unique talents and you've got him gallivanting all over the city traipsing after you and your piece of skirt, covering your behind while you snog her senseless in the garage for all to see and take advantage of. Have you lost your ever-loving mind, boy?"
There were so many things to take umbrage at in that statement. Piece of skirt? I waited for Nick to put her right, or at the very least tell her to pull her head in. How dare she speak to the owner of the firm in that manner.
"Carmel, sweetheart," he crooned, giving her a wattage overloaded Nick Anscombe special smile. She huffed a sound out in annoyance, but I saw her lips twitch in a barely contained smile.
I waited for the hammer blow, for him to put her in her place and tell her I was more than just a piece of skirt. He'd diffused the situation brilliantly with that croon and sexy smile, now was the time to put the old hag in her place. I could almost feel a smug smile of my own tugging at my lips.
And then he dashed all my hopes and crushed my fragile heart.
"What job is Ben meant to be on?"
Chapter 24
And I Understood Every Word He Didn't Say
"It came in while you were on the plane," Ben offered, heading over to the door that led back to the rest of the ASI headquarters. He started punching in the code to get inside.
"Why wasn't it part of the briefing?" Nick asked, taking a pile of small notes from Carmel's outstretched hands as he walked past the desk. I watched him wink at her and her responding shake of the head as she sat back down behind the desk.
I trailed after both men, feeling decidedly like a third wheel and an imposter in this place. Carmel watched me with an impassive face. Not exactly unfriendly, but not welcoming either. I smiled, thinking a little cowgirl charm never goes astray, and received a raised eyebrow in return.
Sweet Seduction Serenade Page 24