“Wait!” But her voice was too weak to carry more than a couple feet.
She wasn’t sure how long she stood there before Kendall came to stand next to her. “Wow,” she muttered. “That was like a movie kiss if I ever saw one—only way better.”
“He’s leaving,” Saffron said. “I won’t see him again.” Why did that make her want to cry?
“Probably a good idea since you’re in love with Tyson.”
Tyson’s name brought her world into focus again. “Right.” She forced a shaky laugh. “I hope Vaughn will be okay.”
Kendall chuckled. “Oh, he’ll be okay. He’s the kind of man every woman wants, and he’ll find someone else. I mean, once he gets over you, of course.”
That made Saffron feel terrible. She’d never given him any promises about the future, and he was no different than a hundred other guys she’d dated.
Well, maybe just a little different.
Vaughn had disappeared from view, but Saffron still stared after him. She’d been going somewhere before he’d kissed her, but she couldn’t remember where.
“Can you give me a lift to my car?” Kendall said. “I’m going to move some of my things back to the house while Mom’s in this weird mood. She gave me some cash a few minutes ago and made me a doctor’s appointment. Mind you, I won’t be staying long with her, but I’m thinking after tonight, you won’t be at the inn.”
Saffron started for her car, glad to have a purpose. “I’ve already missed checkout for today, but you may be right.” She hesitated before adding, “Tyson said I could stay at his place. He said there didn’t have to be strings.”
“Yeah, right,” Kendall said with a snort. “There are already so many strings I can barely see either of you.”
Saffron stopped walking. “What do you mean?”
“I mean your past, your son, the dreams you had. Every memory you had with him. Wanting to prove to yourself and Mom that she was wrong. That you didn’t make a mistake falling in love with him. I know with me those are all huge factors.” Kendall tore off a bit of nail with her teeth. “Though after yesterday, I think I might be through with Joel. I’m going to let him have his fun, but when he wants to see me again, I’m going to lay down some rules.”
“Tyson and I would have made it,” Saffron insisted. “And I’m not getting back together with him because of the past. I love him now. He hasn’t changed all that much.”
“He does seem like a great guy,” Kendall agreed. “If you’re anything like me, you’ll enjoy all the medicine talk.”
Saffron didn’t reply. She wasn’t imagining the connection between her and Tyson. She was sure it existed—at least she was when she was with him. Her confusion had to do with Vaughn, that’s all. Now him she was attracted to only because they’d dated.
Saffron craned her neck as she slid into the car. Still no sign of Vaughn even from the street. Well, he wasn’t her concern any longer.
Some of what she was thinking must have shown in her face because Kendall put her hand on Saffron’s arm. “Saying goodbye stinks, but if you really want a life with Tyson, you had to do it. From what I’ve seen, Vaughn isn’t the kind of guy to take a back seat to anyone—or who’ll stand around waiting for things to go wrong with you and Tyson. He’ll find someone else. Don’t worry.”
That Kendall was right was apparent in the way Vaughn had broken up with her. It was what she wanted, but why did it hurt so much?
She glanced up at the house as she drove away, and was surprised to see her mother’s slender figure framed in the doorway.
25
Tyson smiled with relief when Jana came into the room where he was talking to his very young patient and her parents. Her eyes met his, and for a moment he felt a loss he couldn’t describe. Was it possible to love two women at the same time? Because he realized that his renewed feelings for Saffron hadn’t changed the way he felt about Jana.
Her gaze slid past him, dark and bottomless. “Hi, Patty,” she said brightly to the child. “I’m Dr. Reynolds. I’m here to make sure you’re comfortable while they’re fixing your hernia.”
“You look like Princess Jasmin,” Patty said.
Tyson grinned. Patty wasn’t the first child to point that out.
Jana leaned over and whispered. “I’m under cover,” she said. “I had to sneak out of the palace. But don’t worry. I’m very good at what I do.”
“Even for a princess,” Tyson agreed.
Patty and her parents laughed, while Jana went on to describe in simple and unfrightening terms what she and her partner would be doing as anesthesiologists. The surgery was a minor one, like dozens of others Tyson had assisted with, but it was still scary for the child, and even more so for the parents, who would have to give their daughter into the care of strangers. As a resident, Jana would be working with a more experienced anesthesiologist, but she was the one who always talked to the children and parents.
“We’ll take really good care of her,” Jana said to them. She waved to Patty. “Your nice nurses will be taking you back in a couple minutes, and I’ll meet you there.”
Tyson followed her from the room. “You were perfect with her.”
She smiled, her head shaking back and forth. “Princess Jasmine . . . I’m wondering if I should get a costume.”
“Ooh, I’d like to . . .” Tyson closed his mouth. He didn’t have any right to want to see her in any costume, not when he’d basically broken up with her because of Saffron. What he’d been going to say was more appropriate between lovers anyway, not colleagues, and that was all they were now.
Jana’s smile faltered. “How are things going?”
“Good.” Great, actually, but how could he say that to her? Not that it mattered. Both “good” or “great” spelled the end of their relationship. “How are you doing?”
“I miss you.” Her eyes filled up then, but she blinked the tears away.
He missed her too—their conversations, the nights in San Diego with his parents, talking shop in the hospital cafeteria. But Saffron was his first love and the mother of the son he’d never know. He loved her. He had a lot to make up for.
“I’m sorry,” he said to Jana, wishing he could hold her and tell her it would be all right. No way he could promise that. In fact, tonight he planned to make his intentions clear to Saffron. They’d been given a second chance, and this time he wouldn’t let her down.
“I’m glad you’ve been honest with me,” Jana said.
But he hadn’t been. Not entirely. Because he still loved her.
He swallowed hard. “I’ll meet you in the OR.”
Walking away was hard.
A text message from Saffron eased his heart. She’d be leaving for Oceanside in about thirty minutes, and he’d see her right after he finished the hernia repair. Maybe after tonight, he could reconcile his feelings for the two women who’d stolen his heart. He couldn’t wait to see her.
Before Saffron had finished getting ready for her date, packing her one suitcase and the box of beads in case she didn’t return, Kendall arrived. Saffron grabbed a luggage cart from the front desk and helped her sister carry a load of her things, packing them in Kendall’s car carefully to take up less room.
“No matter how you look at it, there’s at least one more load,” Saffron said. “But there’s no hurry.”
“I’ll get the rest in the morning.” Kendall opened her car door. “Thanks, and have fun tonight. I hope he takes you someplace romantic.”
“Well, it won’t be parasailing.” It was meant as a joke, but it came out more as a complaint.
Kendall made a face. “Good. I was thinking more along the lines of an expensive dinner and candlelight. Text me and tell me how it goes, okay?” She started to get inside her car but stopped short, her expression grave. “Saffron . . . if . . . if Joel doesn’t want to stay with me. If he doesn’t want to be a dad . . . I’m thinking I’d like to go to your Lily’s House—for a while at least. I want to see what it’s
like. I want to meet Lily and your other foster sisters. And mostly I want what I decide is best for the baby to be my choice.”
“Of course.” Saffron hugged her and started to back away, but Kendall clung to her.
“If I decided it was better for the baby to have a mom and a dad,” she whispered in Saffron’s ear, “would you hate me? Because I know you would have done anything to keep your son.”
“Oh, no!” Saffron tightened her hold. “Not at all. I support you no matter what. I know how hard it is alone. I-I wish I would have talked to a counselor at school. I would rather have given him up than watch him . . .” Saffron couldn’t say it. The heaviness was back, the longing for her son.
“Thank you.” Kendall broke away, smiling. “Remember to text me. I expect details.”
Halla had said nearly the same thing in a text. “I will.”
On the drive to Oceanside, Saffron remembered that she hadn’t answered Tyson about his mother’s Sunday dinner invitation. They’d exchanged a few texts about her mother and Kendall and their date, but she didn’t want to go on Sunday with him to his parents’ house. Not this soon. They were so nice—overly nice—and it made her feel worse about not wanting to spend time with them. Maybe she could put off another visit for a few more weeks. He could go alone this weekend. She wouldn’t mind.
Saffron arrived at the hospital twenty minutes before her planned meeting with Tyson at four. They’d planned for her to follow him over to the gated community where his condo was located. After a tour of his place, they’d have dinner and go from there. She was so nervous her stomach was doing flips. Maybe she needed some herbal tea to soothe her stomach. She’d seen some in the cafeteria the last time she was here.
She walked through the parking lot and was already hot and sweaty when she entered the cool hospital. Following her memory and a few signs, she attempted to find the cafeteria but had no luck. Probably because she kept going over her last moments with Vaughn and wondering how much she should tell Tyson about him.
Finally, she came across a desk and asked the woman there. As she thanked the woman, Jana appeared behind her. She smiled when she saw Saffron. “Hey, how are you?”
Saffron’s stomach sank. Of course she’d run into Jana. Would she constantly run into her as long as Tyson worked at this hospital?
“I’m good. Thanks. But I’m looking for the cafeteria again.” Saffron could see now that she’d ended up near the same place where they’d talked to Jana on Tuesday. It was almost as if Saffron had wanted to cross paths with her. But for what purpose—to make sure she was okay or to keep an eye on the competition?
“I seem to have a bad sense of direction when I’m inside this place,” Saffron admitted.
Jana laughed. “You’re not the only one. Since we’re so close to it, we’re always getting questions about the location. Come on. I’ll show you.”
“Oh, I think I can find it now.”
“I’m going that way anyway.” To the woman behind the desk, Jana added, “See you tomorrow.”
Saffron walked with Jana to the doorway of the cafeteria, where Jana said, “I want to thank you for the other day. I was having a bit of a hard time, and while I feel funny you gave me your necklace, it cheered me up. I wore it when I went out last night.”
Good, so the woman wasn’t sitting around moping. “Hot date?” Saffron asked with maybe a little too much enthusiasm.
Jana shook her head. “Romance movie with the girls. We always have a sappy movie night when someone breaks up.”
“Sounds like me and my sisters, only with us it usually involves a lot of something sugary and fattening.” Saffron smiled, remembering the pastries Halla and Elsie had brought her. “So did it work?”
“It helps.” But instead of smiling, Jana’s lower lip wobbled. She bit down on it, as if searching for control.
“I’m sorry.” Saffron touched her arm, feeling more terrible by the second.
“It’s—I’m going to be okay. I don’t know that we’ve broken up permanently. I mean, we still have a connection. Every time I run into him, I feel it—we both feel it. I can tell. But someone from his past came back. They have a history together, and a baby that died. I feel terrible for him, but how can I compete? That sort of relationship pulls you back, you know?” Jana shook her head, pausing as someone came out of the cafeteria.
Jana waited until they were alone to continue. “This week was the first time in six months I didn’t go with his family to his dad’s weekly therapy. I love going and helping out, chatting with his mom, spending the night at his aunt’s. And Helene—that’s his mom—canceled our regular Thursday lunch today. I know she has to support her son’s choices, but she’s been like a mom to me since mine died, and I already miss her.”
Saffron didn’t know what to say. Here she was trying to avoid eating Sunday dinner with Tyson’s family, and Jana was crying because she missed his mother.
“It’s silly,” Jana said, pulling herself together with a deep breath. “You hear so many stories of people who hate their mother-in-laws, but seriously, even if I didn’t love him so much, I’d think about marrying him because of her.”
“She sounds like a great person.” The words scraped along Saffron’s throat on the way out. She’d have to make a better effort to get past her aversion to the Dekkers. Mrs. Dekker was trying, and she deserved a daughter-in-law who loved her, no matter what happened in the past.
“Anyway,” Jana said, “I know this is more than you ever wanted to hear about a stranger. I thought I got it all out last night, but my friends aren’t willing to hear me say I still love him, and that I know he’s doing the best he can with the situation. It feels good to tell someone, even if it makes me look kind of pathetic. He bought a ring, you know, but I guess now I might never see it.”
A ring? Tyson hadn’t mentioned that. Pressure built in Saffron’s chest. “I’m so sorry,” she murmured.
“Thanks.” Jana gave Saffron a smile that contradicted the sadness in her eyes. “Hey, if you live around here, maybe we can go shopping sometime, or you can come to our next girls’ night out and meet everyone. I’d love to see the jewelry you make and so would they.”
“I’m actually from Arizona,” Saffron said. “I’m here visiting family.”
“That makes it tough. Well, thank you again for the necklace—and for the listening ear.” She paused, taking a card from the pocket of her white jacket. “If you ever need anesthesia, let me know. I’ll give you a discount.”
Somehow Saffron laughed. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Saffron turned into the cafeteria, not wanting to watch Jana leave. She looked so sad. As if she were in mourning like Saffron still felt she was, even after eight years. How long would it take for Jana to get over Tyson? Saffron hadn’t been able to get over him or losing her son. Although maybe at last she had. Finally, she was taking control of her destiny, and yesterday in Vegas with Kendall and Vaughn, she hadn’t felt sad at all. She hoped Jana recovered more quickly.
Saffron drank her tea slowly, but it did nothing for the heaviness she felt. When she finished, she realized she was late now, and she hurried through the hospital corridors to the lobby where she was supposed to meet Tyson.
There he was, looking handsome and sexy in dark dress pants and a gray button-down shirt that showed part of his neck and chest. Unlike Vaughn, his chest was smooth and hairless, so he probably waxed. A little smile crept to her face. She hadn’t known that about him. The grip on her heart relaxed a little.
“Hi, beautiful,” he said, his gaze running down her white pants and her sleeveless purple blouse. “You really did get a little sun.” He leaned over and kissed her. It felt right, but Saffron couldn’t help looking around to see if Jana was watching.
“I’ve been putting aloe gel on it.” Speaking of which, she still had Vaughn’s bottle of aloe in the car.
He grinned at her. “That’s what you said over text.”
“Oh, right. I’ve b
een texting with Halla too, and a few others. I’ve forgotten who I’ve told what.”
He put his arm around her gently. “That doesn’t hurt, does it?”
“Not at all.” She leaned further into him as they started walking to the door. Okay, this was nice.
“I’ll go with you to your car,” he said. “Then you can drive me to mine and follow me to the condo.”
“Perfect,” she said.
After leaving the physician’s parking lot, Saffron followed Tyson through a maze of streets to a gated condo complex where she used the code he’d given her to get inside.
“Tour now or later?” he asked as they met in his driveway.
“Whichever you prefer.” She wanted to see his place but was nervous at the same time. Going inside meant being alone. It meant making decisions about where they were heading.
Tyson flashed her a grin. “I missed lunch, so if you can eat, I’d rather have an early dinner.”
Saffron thought of the half-finished sandwich she’d left at her mother’s. “I’m hungry too. Let’s go eat first.”
Taking her hand, he led her to the front passenger seat of his car. “Does Italian sound good?”
“Sounds great.” She laughed. “We had Italian for our first prom. Remember?”
He grinned and opened the door. “Prom? Right, but I suggested it more because of kindergarten when we had spaghetti for Around the World Day, or whatever it was called.”
“That’s right. What a mess!” How sweet that he remembered. “You always let me butt in line.”
He kissed her briefly without seeming to hurry. “I was smitten even then.”
Saffron smiled all the way to Dominic’s at the Harbor. The restaurant wasn’t busy this early on Thursday night, and they were seated immediately. She ordered the lasagna, while he opted for spaghetti and meatballs in memory of their kindergarten year. “My mom makes spaghetti all the time,” he said to her. “Normally, she’s a great cook, but spaghetti is not one of her better dishes. Here it’s fabulous. You want to share the stuffed mushrooms for an appetizer?”
Broken Lies Page 24