by Claire Angel
“What’s up?”
“Um, I can come back, when you’re decent.”
“Everything is covered Sarah. I am decent enough.”
While that may be so, I wasn’t going to be able to talk to him, if he insisted on staying that way. It was hard to concentrate, and I was shaking now.
I pulled my hands together, to straighten them out, while he waited for me to tell him why I was intruding. I started to speak, but nothing came out. This was going to be harder than I imagined.
How could I think, when he was dressed like that?
Chapter 12
Richard
“I can’t think if you’re not going to put something on.”
“You’re the one that is charging in. I needed to get cleaned up after the ride. You know that woman would never stop talking?”
“Yes, Amber. I saw that you two were cozy.”
“Is that what you are here for? Are you jealous that I was talking to Amber?”
She scoffed at me and I could tell that she didn’t like that statement at all. It just made me smile a little brighter. I don’t know what it was about her, but she had a way of getting all of my attention. It was hard to ignore the darting eyes that were taking me in. I could feel all of her attention on my form.
“No, I am not jealous of Amber. If you want her, have her, though I don’t think you’ll be very happy with it.”
I grinned at her and she scowled at me. It was apparently very easy to rile Sarah up and I was trying to figure out why I hadn’t done that more before.
“So, what’s going on?”
I tried to be as serious as possible, but it was really hard to, especially when she was so worked up. I liked to think that it was because of me, but I wasn’t really sure about that. I never knew what was going to happen with Sarah. She was one of the only people, that I couldn’t seem to read.
“I don’t have my presentation. I had it, but it’s gone. I know that you entrusted me with the responsibility and it’s a big deal. I don’t know what happened, but I don’t have it.”
She was slurring a little bit and I would have guessed that she had had those drinks that she warned me about. Now that I was really looking at her, a flush had gone through her face and her chest was a little red. The more I looked at her, the harder I became. It was only when her wide-eyed glance caught my eye, that I realized she had excited me fully. I was standing there, trying not to look, because what she had to say was important, but it felt near impossible.
“You’re not even listening to me. Did you even hear me? I have no presentation!”
“There is no need to get all worked up about its Sarah. Mistakes happen.”
It was killing me, because I knew what had happened to her presentation. I knew that her enemy had it and I wanted to butt right into it. No matter what Charles said, it didn’t feel right for her to beat herself up over everything, especially when none of this was her fault.
“I know they do, it’s just, they don’t happen to me. I hate excuses, so I am not going to give you one. I don’t really know what happened anyways.”
I tried to calm her down and tell her that it wasn’t a big deal, but that just made her suspicious.”
“If I was someone else on the team, would you be so understanding about it?”
I chuckled and shook my head. “I really am starting to think that there is no winning with you.”
“I wouldn’t go that far, but it’s certainly not easy for sure.”
“No, I wouldn’t be as understanding.”
“Why are you treating me different than all of the other ones?”
She knew the answer, but for some reason, she wanted to hear it. It wasn’t that hard for me to say it out loud, so I did and that shut her up.
“I want you Sarah. That’s all there is to it. I want you and I look at you and talk to you differently than I do the rest.”
Sarah bit her lower lip and pushed her hair back.
“Well, I wanted you to yell at me or something. This is kind of a letdown actually.”
“Do you want me to punish you?”
All of a sudden, I was really liking the sound of it. Her eyes got wide and then I immediately felt bad about it. I shouldn’t have thought that of course, but I wasn’t able to help myself. I wanted to be good, really, I did, but it was impossible when she was around.
Her attention was below my waist more than ever before. She was looking at me a little more thoroughly and I liked the attention. My need was getting more pronounced because of it, impossibly so.
“Well, um, no, I don’t want to be punished or yelled at. But that’s what I was waiting for. I can’t believe that you’re being so cool about it. I really thought you would be upset.”
I wasn’t mad. Not at all. I wished that I could tell her what really happened, but that would only make matters worse.
“So, what am I supposed to do, when the presentations are going on?”
“Just come with and listen. I am sure there is a teaching moment in there somewhere.”
“Are you making fun of me?”
“No, I am not. I would never do that. I know how much you’ve been working on it, and I can imagine how disappointed you are.”
She agreed, but Sarah was still waiting for me to yell. God, I felt like shit because I couldn’t tell her. None of this was her fault.
“I am. Okay, well I guess I will sober up for the thing. I thought you were going to fire me for sure.”
“Not likely. I like having you around Sarah. I don’t suppose you will be around much longer though. I heard about the app.”
“The app won’t change anything. It will just add some money to the bank account.”
“You’re still planning on being my intern?”
The way I said it, made it sound like she was mine and mine alone. I didn’t correct it. That seemed to be the proper sentiment to send to her. I wanted her. She was mine and just because I hadn’t gotten to touch her yet, didn’t mean anything. It just meant that I was going to have to work for it, something I never got to do.
“Of course. I still have a lot to learn from you Richard.”
I grinned and moved closer. She stepped back like I was on fire.
“I don’t think I am ready for that lesson Sir. I will see you at the conference.”
And just like that, Sarah was flitting away. She was far too good at that and it was getting on my last nerve. I wish she knew that. If she did, would she even care? Somehow, I doubted it.
I ran into Charles on the way down and I wanted to hit him. He had put me in the middle of something and now I was supposed to just let it all go. I didn’t want to. It didn’t feel like the best course of action, but at the moment, it was all I could do.
“Sarah just came to me and told me that she wasn’t going to be able to do her presentation. She thinks that she has lost it.”
“Did you tell her what happened?”
I shook my head and he grinned. “It’s killing you, isn’t it? I know that you like to make everything right. When it comes to women, trust me when I tell you, that it is best to stay out of it. All you will do is get in the middle and make things worse. You have to act like this is beneath you.”
“I know that female squabbling isn’t my business, but you should have seen her. She had started drinking and was really distraught.”
Charles didn’t have any sympathy. I think that he was showing me how I was acting. It just wasn't like me. I don't know what Sarah was doing to me, but she was changing me in ways I wasn't ready for.
“Fine, I get it. I am just going to let this shitshow play out, but if it gets worse than this, I'm going to blame you for it.”
“She probably will never even find out that Amber did it. It will always be something that she figures that she lost. Let her blame herself for it, it will just make her stronger. I don't think I've ever seen you act like this before. Maybe I should get to
know Sarah instead. So that you will have your wits about you for the conference.”
I gave him a look that told him if he touched her, I would kill him. We were friends, best friends and had been for years, but it wasn't going to be enough. Not when it came to Sarah.
Chapter 13
Sarah
I had been convinced that I was going to get fired. I could not see it playing out any other way. After the amount of importance that was put on this conference and the presentation that the interns were making, I didn't think there was any way I was going to get out of being fired. Now that I wasn't fired though, I didn't know what to do.
Richard told me just to go to the conference like it was no big deal. I wanted to be there with the other interns that I’d came up with, but at the same time, I didn't want to go. It was supposed to be my moment to shine. I had worked on that stuff for so long. I just couldn't believe that all that work was for nothing.
I went to the conference, because it was my job and I tried not to be too bummed out over it. There were a lot of interns that were going to be doing presentations. I didn’t know they were going to do, but I just knew that I didn’t want to watch them all. I wanted to be out of here. My moment in the spotlight was now gone forever.
Even though I was in a pretty foul mood, I could see the benefit of watching the other presentations. I got to see different styles, as well as pick up some new ideas for the next time I had to do one. This wasn't going to be the last time that we had such an assignment and I was trying hard to get myself back to a positive mindset.
So, I listened, and I tried to learn. There were almost fifteen presentations in all, each of them two minutes long and so far, so good. I was comparing my own presentation to the rest of them, but there was one presentation in particular that got me sitting up. It was Amber and I could tell from the first sentence, that she had my presentation.
I was sitting close to Richard and for a moment, I almost told him exactly what I had just figured out. She was reading my presentation. I just knew it and I couldn't believe it. Maybe if I could stop her…
That wouldn't do me any good. I had to calm myself down. I was getting all worked up for nothing. I had known that Amber didn't like me, but I did not realize that she was able to do such horrible things. How could she have done this to me?
The more I thought about it, the more upset I became. I had to listen to Amber for two whole minutes, telling everyone that the presentation that she had made, was her own. But it was my words coming out of her mouth and for some reason, it only made it worse. I was practically vibrating by the time she was done. I was just that mad.
Richard asked me if I was okay.
I told him that I was fine. It looked like he wanted me to tell him something else, to give more information, but I had nothing else to say. At this point, all I could do was try not to freak out. The feeling of betrayal, even from Amber, was practically suffocating.
Not freaking out, was easier said than done, when Amber passed by with the biggest grin on her face. She was being praised for her presentation and all of it was making me sick. How did they not know, that it wasn’t Amber? She wasn’t the one that worked on it all week…
The rest of the conference was a blur. I didn’t learn anything, and I basically ignored my boss. He wanted to know what was wrong, but I just couldn’t get it out, as much as I wanted to. There was no way that I was going to be able to tell him what was going on. He wouldn’t believe me and if he did, I would feel like a tattletale. In the end, I just had to swallow down my pride and listen to everyone gush at Amber while we got dinner.
“You haven’t said much of anything today. You’re already leaving?”
“Yes, I think that it’s best that I go. I can’t deal with all of the celebration going on.”
“Ok. Maybe you need some alone time. I will see you later.” He said with concern and I just ignored what he was saying. I didn’t want to be around my fellow interns or Richard. I was in a dark place and I didn’t want to be around anyone that I didn’t know. I wasn’t going to be good company anyways. That much I knew for sure.
I didn’t know Chicago all that well, but we were staying downtown, so I was sure that I was going to be able to figure something out. I knew what I needed, I just had to find it.
***
Once I got back to my room, I changed out of my professional clothes and threw a summer dress on. It was hot and I knew after I started drinking, it was going to make it even hotter. I had one thought in my mind, find a drink.
When I got out of the hotel, it wasn’t hard to see several establishments that would give me exactly what I needed. I didn’t want to think about the conference and I certainly didn’t want to think about Amber anymore. I think if I did, it was just going to piss me off even more. There was nothing that I could think to do at the moment. I wanted to just be numb and forget it all.
The first bar I found, wasn’t really my sort of place. It was upscale but had a certain type of clientele in there. It was all older businessmen and the servers were all pretty and most likely in college. I felt out of place there, like I was on the wrong side of the bar, but I was just going to ignore it all. I didn’t want to worry about men anyways. The few that hit on me, I rebuffed them quickly and figured that would be the end of it.
I started taking shots, something I knew better than to do, but it didn’t seem to matter. I didn’t think that Richard was going to get mad at me, so I could do what I wanted. I wanted to let loose and after each shot, that became a little easier to achieve. I was going to get exactly what I wanted and soon.
After about the fourth shot, I started to chase it with a beer and slow myself down. I usually didn’t drink, and I could already feel it hitting me like a ton of bricks. The more I tried to pretend that everything was fine, the more I was letting it eat at me.
I missed Donna and wished more than anything, that she was in New York with me. Hell, I wish she was in Chicago with me right now, because I really needed to talk to her. We still kept in touch, but it wasn't the same. I missed living with somebody that I actually liked. Even after just two weeks of living with Amber and her cronies, as well as faceless people that I didn't even really want to get to know, I missed Donna even more.
There was someone in particular that I missed as well. My father. Anybody right now would have been better than who had been around lately. I did not want to believe it, but I was missing home and everyone in it. I was even missing college, the place that I couldn't wait to get away from. I convinced myself that I would graduate and get a great job, and that everything would be perfect. I could not have been more wrong than I was. It wasn’t that way at all I was finding out. It was certainly different than how it had all played out in my head.
The bartender gave me a look when I ordered a few more shots, but I just ignored it. She didn't know what sort of day I had had, so I didn't care for her judgment. I wasn't here for that. I was here for a drink.
Once I got a few more shots, I held them awkwardly in my hand and moved to one of the tables. There was some kind of sports program playing on the television, but it was better than nothing. It was certainly better than all the dirty looks that I was getting from the bartender. She looked at me like I wasn't supposed to be there.
Chapter 14
Richard
Since I was in Chicago and I didn't have anything to do for the evening. I had set up a meeting with an old friend of mine from high school. He had moved to Chicago to work at one of the law firms there. It had been a long time since I had seen him, and I was looking forward to it.
Greg had always been a good friend and I was curious to see how life was treating him lately. The last I had heard; he’d gotten married and was now living that sort of life. He had started leaving the running of his company to someone else, so that he would have more time for his family. I had a feeling that Greg was going to be a lot different than the carefree guy that I knew before.
When I got to Ramones, I looked around for Greg and found him right away. He was actually waving to me when I got there. I could see that he still had the same silly ass grin that I remembered from before.
“Oh man. It's good to see you.” He had stood up and at first, I thought he was going to shake my hand, but instead he gave me a hug. This was definitely not the Greg that I knew before. Something had certainly changed him, and I had a good feeling of what it was. It was the same thing that was changing me right now.
“You look good, man.”
“You look good yourself. You don't seem like you ever age Richard. Every time I see you, you look just the same. Must be that single life, that's doing it to you. All of those young women, are keeping you young.”
I shook him off and told him that it wasn't the case.
“The single life is not all it’s cracked up to be. I am trying to change that status right now.” It was funny that I wouldn't talk about Sarah with anyone else, not even my best friend, Charles. I don't know why, but I knew that Greg would understand what I was going through. He had just gone through the same thing; I could tell that a woman had gotten to him.
“I think it's about time that you found someone. You have been single for a long damn time. Did you finally find one that is going to change that?”
“I didn’t think I would ever say that, but yes. I have found her. But I am struggling to express my feelings to her. I hear that you're married now. Was it to the same girl, the one that you were engaged to before?” As much as he liked to talk about me and my single life, I could say the same thing about him.
Greg had always been good with the ladies and it wasn’t a given that the last woman I saw him with, would be his wife years later. It could be a lot of other options as well.