“And what a body it is.”
She grinned. “Did you go back to NTE yet?”
“Yes, today. You’ll probably definitely guess what they’re doing to me.”
“What? Are they firing you? No. Worse I bet. Are they sending you to lead—”
“Generations. You got it.”
“Those bastards! I knew they were awful, but damn, did they work fast. I bet I’m next.”
“Yeah, they didn’t give me much of a choice, so I said screw it and took the job.”
“Ugh. Looks like my job hunt just started.”
We continued talking and drinking until last call at 10 PM. Topics ranged from quitting NTE and starting a small business, to how our families were handling our migrations, to dropping everything and just traveling the world. We were fairly drunk as Rob came over and politely told us to leave. Then I realized the big news that I had forgotten to share with Helen.
“I got a place!”
“What?”
“An apartment! I have to show you. Let’s jump on the next bullet.”
The city was dead at that early hour, and the bullet was empty. We stumbled through the hallways of my building but managed to stay quiet enough so that none of my neighbors yelled. As I reached for my phone to unlock the door, Helen grabbed me with all her might and threw me up against the door. She pressed her whole body against mine, grinding into me in the best way possible. Eye to eye and breathing heavily, she pushed her luscious lips against my quivering ones.
Amazing!
We stood there for what felt like a minute before I reached one hand up to caress her neck. Not wanting to spoil the moment but also not wanting my neighbors to see, I grabbed my netphone with my free hand and pressed the unlock command.
Click. Click.
Beep.
The door flung open, causing us to spill into the dark kitchen. We stumbled to the only piece of furniture that I had, an old couch, and plopped down in the middle. She reached for the zipper to my coat and began the frantic fight to rip off my clothes. I began the same struggle with hers, and coats and shirts and pants flew across the room.
“Clumsy” didn’t begin to describe the scene, but it wasn’t because of nerves. Both of us actually seemed quite comfortable, probably because of the trust we had developed over the friendship. Instead, the awkwardness of our movements was most likely because we were in newer bodies that were heavily influenced by liters of strong beer. Regardless, we were releasing all the painfully obvious sexual tension that had built up since we’d first met and for basically our entire lives being numb from the waist down.
We continued kissing as she moved to straddle me. In underwear only, we made out intensely for several minutes, just enjoying each other for the first time. Eventually, we got to the point when things would either progress or stop, so one of us had to say something.
Helen pulled her face back ever so slightly to lead the way. “So, I’ve never gone all the way. You?”
I hesitated, afraid to give away my amateur status.
“Ryan?”
I looked down, embarrassed. “This is my first time…even kissing.”
She pulled away a little more to look me in the eyes. “Hey, not bad for a rookie? Do you want to do more?”
“Do you?”
A silly grin came over her face, and she leaned in. “Yes! Let’s figure it out together.”
She took off her remaining clothes, and the sheer sight of her made me tingle. Then I revealed myself to her, and she smiled in acknowledgement. The moment I had always fantasized about was finally coming true, and with the best person I could have ever imagined.
She straddled me again, resting nervous hands on my chest.
I gave in to the urge to explore her naked body with my hands. Turned out that they got a hell of a ride going over all of her breathtaking curves—her thighs, the small of her back, and all the way up to her shoulders. My hands finally settled upon her perfectly sized breasts and began massaging each one intermittently.
“That feels great!”
Still awkward but trying to take in the moment, I became aware of her right hand as it started the descent down my body. First, on my chiseled chest, then sneaking down to my exceptional abs, and even farther until she began playfully bumping into my host’s large endowment. Without hesitation, she began teasing it.
“Oh wow.” The words fell from my mouth as her hand worked wonders.
Things progressed quickly from there as we moved to recline lengthwise on the couch for the best access to each other. Being on top, I continued the hand play, but this time moving down her body to find the pleasure zones I had learned about years ago in anatomy class and on the net. While I wasn’t completely sure what I was doing, her moans made it seem like I should keep going. Meanwhile, she continued working me with her hand, which felt amazing. Then she again moved things along.
“I guess we should just try doing it.”
“Okay. So, I should just…”
“Yeah.”
I got into position, and she helped to guide me in. We both made the gentle noises of pleasure as I ever so slowly slid deeper. It was heaven! She then reached down and began stimulating herself while I instinctively started a methodical thrust. It was as beautiful and hot as two drunk, newly mind-migrated people having sex could be. And then I realized I wasn’t going to last much longer.
Luckily, she felt the same way, and let me know. “I think…I think I’m going to finish!”
Her body began to tighten up from the inside out, and that was all it took for me to be done as well.
I couldn’t contain myself. “Yes! Yes! Yes!”
And there it was. She and I were no longer virgins. Panting and spent, I collapsed on top of her. Our sweaty bodies slid against each other, but it felt good since everything was still tingling. After a minute of holding each other, I popped my head up to look back into Helen’s eyes, and with the biggest grin, she broke the silence.
“Wow, Ryan.”
“Wow, yourself!”
“That was much better than I had imagined.”
“Definitely.”
I rolled off of her so that we could sit up and look at each other.
“Seriously, Ryan. I’ve thought about it. We work so well together on every level. I don’t want to rush things any more than we already have, but I think I’m falling in love with you.”
Taken aback at just how indescribably incredible the night had turned out, I was speechless for just a moment. Then I knew exactly how to respond.
Looking deeply into her eyes, I told her exactly how I felt. “I love you too, Sarah.”
Her face went from satisfied to disgusted in an instant. “What the hell did you just say?”
Chapter 19:
Crossing the Line
“I love you too, Sarah.”
I hung up my phone and settled into the seat at the bus station. She would be picking me up in about an hour, and I was nervous as hell. It wasn’t just because civilian life was starting for me again. That was the easy part.
In an hour or so, I would meet my daughter for the first time and have to figure out how the hell to be a father. It was something I didn’t know the first thing about since all I’d had was a deserter and Mr. Reno. But I had promised myself the day Sarah told me about Lucy to not be anything like them, and I had every intention of living up to that promise, even if the war had changed me.
On top of that, I had to figure out how and when to ask Sarah for her hand in marriage. We had messaged each other a little while I was in Pakistan, but most of the time, the communication block put in place to stop extremists from coordinating had meant that we hadn’t been able to communicate with our loved ones with any regularity. So, after four years apart, it only felt right to get to know her in person again. I assumed that s
he had been faithful to me while I was away, as I had been to her. Having heard all the horror stories from my squad, I’d prepared myself for the worst. No matter what, I was certain I loved her and wanted to be with her. I just needed to know she loved me and wanted to be with me. More than just the words, I needed to see her love.
Then there was the question of work. I needed to find a job fast because the living situation was complicated. She’d ended up finishing her degree at Johnson College. However, the loans she’d taken out had made it tough to make ends meet. Sarah and Lucy had moved in with her folks and lived there up until Sarah had gotten her big break. On a whim, she had applied for a lab assistant position at Chronos Chemicals. They’d loved her résumé and interview so much that they offered her the job. After she did the math for her salary, the rent for a place, the commute, daycare, and other expenses, she would have had exactly fifty dollars left over for all other basic needs. So, Sarah initially declined the position, letting the company know that it hadn’t made sense financially. When they’d called her back and offered to pay for rent and daycare, she hadn’t been able to refuse. The problem was that the company had only done that because Sarah was technically a single parent. I would only be able to stay with them for a month or so before the extra benefits would stop, and so, I had to look for work immediately.
There were a couple ads for jobs, saying “Veteran’s Apply,” but I was fairly certain they were temp jobs trying to satisfy a quota. Part of me hated to settle, but anything was better than nothing just to get some cash rolling in.
Deep in thought, my wait at the bus stop flew by, and a message came through from Sarah saying they had arrived. Chills rolled down my spine as it felt like I just got orders for a serious mission that began that very second. I swallowed hard as I walked out to the parking lot.
There she was. There they were. Sarah and my little girl. Then all of the self-doubt that had built up over four years melted away in an instant.
“Charlie!”
“Sarah!”
She hurried over and gave me the biggest hug, letting her feelings be known right away. Lucy mimicked her mother’s excitement, trotting to keep up and then bouncing around our legs as we stood tightly in each other’s arms for a minute or so. Both of us took turns letting loose muted laughs and cries as we hugged and kissed and touched each other’s face.
Lucy’s soft voice interjected as she tugged on my tan fatigue pants. “What are you wearing?”
She had difficulty pronouncing R’s, and I knew that would need to be worked on eventually, but in that moment, it was the most adorable thing I had ever heard.
Sarah pulled away to introduce Lucy and me for the very first time. “Lucy, this is your daddy. Like we talked about before, he just got back from fighting the bad people across the world, and now he’s here to be with us.”
Lucy was a bit bashful, and I couldn’t blame her.
Instinctively, I knew I needed to get on her level to talk to her, so I dropped to one knee. “Hello, Lucy. I’m really glad to meet you. I know you don’t know me, but I want to be the best dad I can be now that I’m here.”
“Will you give me candy?”
Sarah laughed.
I smiled. “Well, as long as your mom thinks it’s okay, I will definitely be giving you some candy.”
“Yay! I like candy.”
I had left from that bus station a single man full of uncertainty, and returned a confident man with an amazing family. It was one of the best moments of my life, and I remembered wishing it could have lasted much longer. But soon, the tough times returned. The search for work was much harder than I could have expected. I managed to land one of those jobs that targeted veterans returning from the GIP conflict. Sure enough, they kept me on for sixty days and paraded around their veteran numbers, then let me go just before they would have to hire me full time. My next two gigs were exactly the same, and while we were able to squeak by, I was starting to lose faith that I would ever find steady work. Fortunately, the next job I landed, at Spades Manufacturing, was full-time assembly line work that offered decent pay and above-average benefits. It was shift work, but I was used to odd hours in the war. Things were just starting to look up for the three of us when Sarah let me know more good news over breakfast.
“Charlie.”
Having just come home from a midnight shift, I almost didn’t hear her. Shaking off my daze, I responded, “What? Oh. Yes, dear?”
“Lucy’s days as an only child are numbered.”
“What!”
“Yup. Number two is on the way.”
“Oh.”
“I waited until I was eight weeks to be sure.”
I was still trying to process what she was saying. While I was too tired to show a lot of emotion, I knew exactly what needed to be done. I had saved enough to buy a modest ring for Sarah, and kept it on me at all times for fear that she would find it. I also didn’t want to miss the right opportunity if it presented itself, so I had asked her folks for permission months prior.
Dropping to one knee right there in the kitchen, I presented the ring to her and put myself out there. The shocked look on her face was priceless as I kneeled.
“Sarah, I’ve loved you since the first day I saw you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and our family. Will you marry me?”
“Oh my God! Yes! Yes! I love you!”
And, shortly after, we were married by a justice of the peace with Sarah’s family and Lucy in attendance at our small ceremony. As exciting as all of it was, being married with two children meant that I needed to bring in as much money as possible. The week after the wedding, I began taking as many double and triple shifts as I could. I would do so for the next couple of years. Working the line was backbreaking to say the least, but that part wasn’t the issue. After a while, the long hours and shift work caught up to me. Sleep was hard enough to come by with the night terrors and other bad dreams, but trying to do it at random hours with small children around made it nearly impossible to get any good rest. Most days I was a walking corpse mustering up just enough brain power to keep the line moving. I was even less lively at home. It was just after Joey’s second birthday that Sarah finally confronted me in a serious way.
“Charlie, are you okay?”
I took an extra second to process the question. “Uh. Yes, honey. I’m fine. Why?”
“We hardly see you anymore. When we do, you’re trying to sleep, but I don’t think you’re even getting much rest. You haven’t had color in your face for a while, and I’m worried.”
“We need the money, Sarah, and I’ll live.”
Sarah broke into a coughing fit. She had started having those the last couple of months, and it didn’t seem like she wasn’t getting better. Lucy and Joey had developed coughs as well, and it reminded me of Mr. Reno’s wife, but I tried to think more positively.
After she gathered herself, Sarah made it clear that something had to give. “Charlie, you’re killing yourself at this job. Can you try to find something with fewer hours, at least?”
“Sarah, you remember how tough it was for me to get this gig. Who knows how long it will take to find something else.”
“I know, Charlie, but we need you around more since we’ve all been sick. Will you at least try?”
“Okay. I’ll start looking next week when I have a day off.”
To my credit, I did look. But none of the job postings seemed like they could keep us afloat or had benefits. Then it wasn’t long after I began the search that we were called in by our family doctor. Sitting in his office, I’ll never forget the cold feeling that came over me as it turned out to be one of the worst days of my life.
“I’m afraid I have some bad news. All of the test results have come back positive for spotted lung.”
“Dammit!” I couldn’t hold back. My worst fears had come true.
&
nbsp; Sarah, not being as familiar, probed to find out more. “What does that mean for me and my children?”
“Well, even a couple years ago, the prognosis would have been pretty grim. However, with recent treatment breakthroughs, we should be able to effectively manage the infection in each of you. Depending on your budget, some of the equipment can be sent home with you so that you don’t have to be in and out of the hospital.”
“Dammit, Doc. How long do they have?” I had obviously already hit the anger phase of grief.
“Again, it’s tough to say these days. Hopefully, we can manage the disease long enough for them to fight it off or for us to come up with even better treatments. While I can’t say for sure what will happen, the future is looking brighter than ever for those with SL.”
Looking at the cost of the equipment, Sarah and I would have had to empty our savings account and still rack up massive debt to get all of the best machines and devices to treat her and the kids. If we were just barely getting by before, we would be hanging on by a thread after that. To add to it, Sarah had always said that I couldn’t keep working the line forever, but I couldn’t give it up without some other way of bringing in money. It was then that my fortune turned for the better, or so I had thought. I got a call from an old service buddy that changed everything.
“Sam! How the hell are you?”
“I’m great, Charlie. Civilian life treating you well?”
“Oh, you know. Each day is a struggle, but we keep on keeping on.”
“I hear that. You working?”
“Yeah. I’m on the line at Spades. You?”
“Actually, I landed a sweet gig in the city. The pay is incredible, and I work only four to five nights a week for only a few hours at a time.”
“What do you do?”
“Stocker. Sort of. I get a message saying to be at a location at a certain time. I show up, and there are packages, sometimes two or three at a time. Then I get another few messages to move the packages to parked cars in the area. After another hour or so, I’m done and get to go home. They wire the money, taxes paid, directly into my account, and I enjoy the rest of my night.”
Between Two Minds: Awakening Page 22