by E. L. Todd
“That’s all I’m willing to give.”
He sighed like he was about to scale the tallest mountain. “I like a challenge.”
“I have one condition.”
“Name it.”
“You can’t kiss me.” That was the last thing I needed. A physical touch was more than I could bear. Handholding was okay, but anything else was too extreme. I knew he would question my strange request, ask me a million questions about it.
But he didn’t. “Whatever you want, sweetheart.
The Date
Rose
I gave him my address despite the warning in my heart. Giving out my residence was rare, practically unheard of. But when he asked for it I didn’t know what to say. If I refused, he would just ask me again.
So I gave in.
People weren’t always what they seemed, but Kyle seemed genuine. He was thoughtful and caring, and he was confident and protective. It was hard to picture a man like him being anything less than heroic.
But I’d been wrong before.
I wanted him. But I was also afraid of him.
At seven on the dot he knocked on my door.
I wore jeans and a blouse, not wanting to get too dressed up. I didn’t know what Kyle planned, and I hoped it wasn’t extravagant. This looming date was giving me anxiety and I tried to keep calm. He was a good man and I had to keep telling myself that.
Everything would be okay.
When I opened the door I saw him standing on the other side. A handful of flowers was in his grasp, an assortment of wild flowers. He wore dark jeans and a collared shirt, getting dressed up but not formal.
That made me feel better.
“I picked these myself. And it took me all day.” He placed them in my grasp.
Every flower was different. There was one red rose, a yellow daisy, and a white lily, among a variety of others. The fact they weren’t quickly bought at the store was touching. He took time out of his day to pick each one—and that meant something. “That was sweet…”
“I’m glad you like them. I thought about you while I picked them.”
I gave him a small smile before I set them on the entryway table.
“I’ve been looking forward to this for the past few days.”
I grabbed my clutch and felt my cheeks redden. Since I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t say anything at all.
“Thank you for going out with me. I think we’ll have a great time.”
“I’m sure we will.” After all the sweet things he said, I had to say something in return.
He never stepped into my apartment. He always stayed on the other side of the threshold. “Ready to go?”
“I am.” I shut the door behind me and locked it. “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” He extended his hand, his palm facing the ceiling.
I stared at it blankly, remembering the last time we touched. He held my hand at the bar, and at the time it felt so right.
He let it hang there, silently pressuring me.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and placed my hand in his.
He smiled in a genuine way, showing all of his perfectly straight teeth. “I have a good feeling about this.”
***
We entered an apartment building near Central Park. Judging the lobby, it was a higher end place. The tile was manicured to perfection, and there was even a doorman at the entrance.
My body tensed in fear. “What are we doing here?” I assumed we were going to dinner or bowling or something. “What is this place?”
“This is my apartment building.” He walked to the elevator and hit the button.
His apartment building? Did he want to go back to his place? That panic settled in all over again, the same terror I felt when he wanted to stay together at his beach house. There was no way in hell I was doing that. “I have to go.” I turned on my heel and immediately ran for the exit. My chest caved in and I could hardly breathe. The world was starting to spin and the nightmare descended.
“Rose?”
I pushed out the front door before the doorman could reach it. When I was at the sidewalk and near other people I felt safer. There were witnesses—tons of them.
“Rose.” Kyle caught up with me and grabbed me by the arm. “What’s going on?”
I twisted out of his grasp just the way I’d been taught. Then I took my defensive stance immediately, ready to break his nose if I had to. I may be small, but I’d fight to the very end and take him down with me.
Kyle raised both hands in surrender. “Okay…I don’t know what’s going on here.”
“Don’t touch me.”
He took a step back. “Rose, what’s wrong? What did I say? What did I do?”
“I’m not going into your apartment. That’s not something I signed up for.” I wasn’t going to be alone with him, not when I felt this uneasy.
“We aren’t going into my apartment.”
I hated liars even more. “Oh really?”
“Yes, really,” he snapped. “I planned something special for us. And it has nothing to do with my apartment.”
“Whatever.” I wasn’t falling for that.
“Rose, be logical for a second. You really think that I would hurt you? That I have some evil plan up my sleeve?” He lowered his hands to his sides. “You know I’m a good guy. Trust your instincts—not your paranoia.”
I lowered my stance, my pulse slowing down. “What is it?”
“Just trust me.” He extended his hand just as he did earlier.
I stared at it with no intention of ever taking it.
“Rose, you can trust me. Let me prove it to you.”
I eyed the door before I looked back at him.
He kept his hand extended. “You can do this. I know you can.”
I knew I was overreacting. Sometimes when I was in uncomfortable situations, the terrified version of me took over. My coping mechanism was to run, to avoid every possibly dangerous situation. But as a result, I wasn’t really living. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” He slowly reached my hand and grabbed it. “Come on. I know you’ll love it.” He guided me to the door and back inside. The doorman eyed us but kept his comments to himself.
We got inside the elevator and Kyle hit the button to the top floor. “I can’t wait to show you.”
I stood beside him and felt the shift of gravity as we moved to the top floor. My stomach felt weightless for a moment before the elevator stopped. When the doors opened we looked directly at the roof and the skyline in the distance. The summer breeze moved through my hair, caressing it like the feel of soft fingers. All my fright disappeared when I realized what this was.
Kyle took my hand and guided me further on the rooftop. A table set in the center, underneath a stream of white lights. Silver platters were on the table, covered to keep warm. A bottle of wine was being chilled in the bucket with two glasses beside it.
Kyle pulled out the chair for me. “It’s a beautiful night, isn’t it?”
“It is.” I sat down and felt him push my chair in.
He took the seat across from me and poured the wine. “I’m going to be honest. I ordered this as take out and threw it on two plates. So, I hope you like steak.”
I removed the lid and inhaled the smell. “It looks delicious.”
“I’m sure it’s delicious too—because I didn’t make it.”
“Those kabobs you made were good.”
“Thank you. I forgot about that.”
As I cut into my food I felt the humiliation creep in. When I thought he was taking me to his apartment I threw a tantrum and threatened to punch him on the sidewalk. I caused a scene with the passerby as well as the doorman. It was embarrassing, to say that least. He must think I’m a freak.
Kyle watched my face as he ate, and he seemed to read the distress on my face. “It’s okay. I understood why you thought that.”
After my behavior he was actually making it easy on me. “I’m sorry I
freaked out…”
“It’s alright,” he said. “Let’s just forget about it.”
It was hard to when I made such a scene. “I just—”
“You don’t have to explain anything.” He drank his wine and focused on his food. “Honestly.”
Now I understood him even less. Why was he spending so much time trying to be with a woman who obviously had some issues? He didn’t seem to care even though he could have anyone he wanted. It didn’t make any sense.
“How was your day?”
“Good. Yours?”
“It was okay. I had to step into the office today. Everyone gets paid on Monday so I had to settle the payroll.”
“You don’t pay someone to do that?”
“No. My dad taught me to manage everything on my own. You can’t trust anyone when it comes to that sort of thing. Besides, if I have someone else take care of it, then I’m pretty much handing my company over to someone else. It’s mine so I should take some pride in it.”
“I can understand that.”
“Besides, I need something to keep me busy. Otherwise, I’ll golf all day and play video games.”
“That sounds nice.”
“It is. But too much free time makes me irresponsible. If I’m not busy, I’m not at my best.”
“Why don’t you take more cases then?”
“I’m selective because it’s so draining. Trials don’t end in two weeks. There’s a lot of planning that goes into it. Sometimes I work so many hours that I really don’t get paid much.”
I ate my food slowly, feeling my stomach slowly settle after my rampage. Kyle changed the subject to make me more comfortable, but my actions still lingered in the back of my mind. I felt foolish—and stupid.
“Do you ever get tired of designing?”
“No. Not yet, at least.” I loved sitting in my quiet office with a pencil in my hand. Time passed so quickly I couldn’t process it. Before I knew it, eight hours had passed and my drawing was finally complete.
“Are you going to design your own house?”
I laughed because it was absurd. “I’m never going to be able to afford that.”
“Really? Why not?”
“I know you have two beach houses, but most of us don’t even get one.” I drank the wine and felt the cool liquid move down my throat. Once it reached my stomach it felt warm.
“Well, it doesn’t have to be a beach house. It can just be a house.”
“Building a home is a lot more expensive than buying an existing one. And I could never afford one in the city. That’s just unheard of.”
“But if you had the opportunity, would you design it?” He ate quicker than most people I know. Half of his plate was already gone but he wasn’t shoveling everything down his gullet. He just took big bites.
“Of course.”
“Do you have an idea what it would be like?”
I shrugged. “For the most part. But you can’t design something unless you know the landscape first. Otherwise, it’s too difficult to picture it.”
“I don’t have a creative bone in my body. I’m all about logistics and facts.”
“I don’t agree with that.”
“Really?” he asked. “Why not?”
“I’m not a lawyer so I’m not totally sure of this, but I would assume a lawyer has to find different ways of approaching situations. He has to figure out how to change the narrative, to convince a grand jury what they should believe. You have to be somewhat creative in order to do that.”
“I guess,” he said with a shrug. “Never really thought about it like that.”
I looked up at the lights and saw them contrast against the black background. A moth was hovering around the lights, infatuated with the warmth. “Did your mom think it was strange that I stayed at your beach house alone?”
Kyle took a moment to figure out what I was referring to. “Not at all.”
If he were lying I would never know.
“She just got engaged so her mind is elsewhere right now.”
“She did?”
“Yeah. They’ve been seeing each other for about a year.”
“That’s great.”
“I like the guy. He has his own wealth, which is a lot more than my mother’s, so I know he’s genuinely interested in her as a person. And he treats her right. You know, takes her on nice trips, opens every door for her, compliments her…she’s happy.”
“That’s great.” I thought he might struggle to accept a new man in his life. Instead of being selfish he was happy for his mother.
“My mom has been through a lot. She deserves to have some joy.”
“Do you have other siblings?”
He paused before he took a bite of his steak. Only a heartbeat had passed but the hesitance was noticeable. “No, I don’t.” He kept his eyes down after that, not making eye contact with me.
I reached uncomfortable territory so I didn’t push any further. “Where’s the wedding?”
“I don’t know any of the details. I suspect they’ll marry somewhere beautiful, have a small ceremony.”
“I’m sure it’ll be nice.”
“Me too.” He finished his plate then placed the lid on top so it wouldn’t attract nats.
I couldn’t finish mine. I was stuffed to the limit. I felt my stomach protrude out past the top of my jeans. When the food was placed in front of me I couldn’t control myself. I chowed everything down. “I’m so full.”
“Me too.” He grabbed the lid and covered my plate.
The nighttime air was the perfect temperature. It was cool, but not cold enough that I needed a jacket. A part of me wanted to stay there forever, but another part of me wondered what else was planned for the evening.
“Dessert?”
“I don’t know…I already ate too much.”
“Come on. You can manage it. I believe in you.”
I chuckled. “Thanks for not losing faith.”
He left the table and tossed his tablecloth on the surface. “Let’s get some ice cream.”
“Should we clean this up?”
“No. Someone will take care of it when we leave.” He grabbed my hand and helped me to my feet. When I didn’t need his help anymore he still kept his fingers wrapped around mine.
I let the touch linger—because I liked it.
***
“Since our last encounter with ice cream ended badly, let’s give it another try.” He handed the popsicle over then licked his own.
Now that I could enjoy my treat I paid attention to the taste. “You’re right. It is good.”
“See? What did I tell you?” Casually, his hand slipped into mine again.
I looked down at our joined fingers and noticed how much larger his hand was than mine. It was always warm whenever we touched, and the comfort it brought me was inexplicable.
“Do you think New York will always be your home?”
“I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else—especially for work.”
“What about LA?”
“Too much traffic.”
He laughed. “And you don’t think there’s traffic here?”
“You can get everywhere on foot. I don’t even own a car.”
“It’s definitely something you can do without. I only have one because of my property outside the city.”
“I’ll admit, I’m a little jealous of your car.”
“Yeah?” He took a few bites of his ice cream, consuming half of it in minutes.
“Yeah. Everyone loves sports cars. The engine is so powerful, and everyone looks at you as you drive by. And you must pick up girls like crazy.”
“Of course,” he said. “But I don’t need a car to do that.”
For the first time, when I pictured him with other women it made me uneasy. Was it jealousy that I felt? Questions came to mind but I never asked them. If I did, then he might ask me the same ones in return. “You’re right. You don’t.”
“You should take it for a drive,�
�� he said. “The next time we visit the property you can be behind the wheel.”
“You trust me with your baby?”
“I trust you with anything, sweetheart.”
No one ever called me that before. Somehow, he made it sound sweet and sexy at the same time.
“I might not give it back to you.”
He chuckled. “I’ll just buy another one. Then we can have matching cars.”
Now I couldn’t tell if he was joking. He had that kind of money lying around? I had a lot in savings and had everything I needed, but I couldn’t wrap my mind around that kind of level of rich. “Do a lot of women go for you for your money?”
“I don’t know if I would say a lot, but I’m sure there’s a good number of them.”
Florence was obsessed over the fact he was a rich lawyer. Other than his looks, that was all she cared about.
“But I can tell when that’s the case. It’s pretty obvious.”
“Does it bother you?”
“If we’re having a fling, no. But if we’re dating, yes.”
“I’m surprised your mother hasn’t arranged for you to marry another rich woman in the Hamptons.”
He laughed loudly. “Oh, she has. Believe me.”
“You didn’t like any of them?”
He shook his head. “No chemistry. I’m not exactly sure what I’m looking for when it comes to women, but I recognize it when I see it.” He gave my hand a gentle squeeze.
The heat flushed through my body, burning my toes and fingers.
Kyle tossed the stick of his Popsicle in the garbage can. “Well, that was pretty good. But I have to stick with the coconut.”
I tossed mine as well. “That’s funny. Because I prefer the pineapple.”
***
At the end of the night Kyle walked me to my door.
My heart was stuck in my throat the entire time, dreading the end of the date. They usually ended with a kiss goodnight, and a possible invitation inside. I told him I didn’t want any of that, and he’d probably stick to his promise.
But I was concerned anyway.
He faced me as we stood in front of my apartment, and his hands were tucked deep into his pockets. “Thank you for spending the evening with me. I hope you had a good time.”
“I did.” It was the best date I’d ever been on. No guy had ever put that much effort into impressing me. It was both romantic and relaxing at the same time. All he did was hold my hand and nothing else.