by Lynn Lamb
“Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 9:00 P.M., channel five: Group Therapy, same age groups as the Survival Talk group. This is for all of us to get out some of the emotional hurdles we are overcoming now.
“Wednesdays at 3:00 P.M., channel six: Book Club, fifteen and up.
“Katie has also been so kind to volunteer for individual and couple’s therapy groups to be set up with her.”
“All groups will start tomorrow since it is Monday. We will probably need to keep up with these group meetings, but we would like to change them to 7:00 in the evening to accommodate our new groups and clubs. When we get out, we thought we could change the times and dates and actually meet in person. That brings us to the next order of business. Do any of you have any questions, comments or needs that should be addressed immediately? Lizzie and I have realized that we haven’t opened up the floor for these topics.”
“Hi, it’s Shelby. I am wondering what you are all doing about, umm, bathrooms?”
“Okay, that’s something we could talk about in Survival Group, but it is definitely an immediate concern. My wonderful husband has been dealing with the toilets at our place, so I am going to let him explain what we have been doing. It has worked for us, so maybe you could modify it to work for you all. Before I have him start, is there any other business? Okay, so thank you, everyone, for your input. I think that we are really going to be able to help each other with these groups. And for everyone in the Book Club, I’m on page 270. So keep reading. Here is Mark.”
I just excused myself from the meeting.
I already talked about the toilets in this journal, so I don’t think I need to record it again. I am concerned that people haven’t worked this out yet. It has been six days since we had plumbing. I know I should be listening, but I am just too grossed out. I don’t want to hear their details. I just hope that they can make themselves some saw dust. Saw dust is the trick to keeping the smell under control.
It went well tonight. I am hoping more people will have a chance to talk with our new group setups. As one big group of twenty-eight people (if I have counted correctly) it is just too hard to have everyone talk. Not only would the meetings become too long, the walkie-talkie set up is not meant for meetings like this. We are making do, though, and everyone has been very polite.
Tomorrow is the one week anniversary of “it.” It seems like we have been living like this forever, but I am not going to complain. I know that our situation is better than some in our group.
And what about all of the neighbors who have survived but don’t have walkie-talkies? I blame myself that they don’t have what they need to communicate and maybe even survive. I have been selfish from the minute I saw the live video streams of D.C. and New York burning. That’s the truth. I scooped up my mother and her credit card and went out and bought tons of everything. What if others couldn’t find what they needed when they realized what was happening? Why didn’t I go to the neighbors’ houses sooner? Monterey is a fairly good size, and I barely hit a small percentage of it.
I remember the first time my mother took me, my big brother and my grandmother to see our new house way back when. The first thing I saw was a hanging sign announcing that this was the Monte Vista Village. There was a small strip mall that ran less than two city blocks in length. It consisted of a market, liquor store, a movie theatre and a few random businesses. The market and liquor store survived all this time, but they changed the movie theatre into a ballroom dance studio. It has actually built itself up pretty well over the past few decades. Now we have a bakery, insurance office, dentist, hair salon, Automobile Club, and the Elks Lodge, along with several hundred homes. What will it look like when we reemerge?
What if all of the other neighbors are dead because I didn’t help them when I could? Are we supposed to break into their homes and just take what we want? Or what if they left their houses because they didn’t know not to? Their deaths will be on my head. I know if I mention this to Katie she is going to tell me that my feelings are natural, and that I have survivor’s guilt, and she’ll be right, of course. Lots of people shell out tons of money to shrinks for them to tell them that whatever they are feeling guilty about is not their fault. But what about when it is their fault, how do they live with themselves?
Between getting started on fixing up the mess in our house and getting ready for the meeting, I’m pretty tired. Perhaps I’m not as healed as I thought I was. Our maybe it’s my guilt that has worn me down. I guess it doesn’t matter. Whatever it is, I’m beat.
July 22
Survivor’s Club Meeting Minutes:
Members in attendance:
Number One: Malcom, Katie Graham
Number Two: Shelby, Matt, Jessica Sheraton
Number Three: Liz, Pete Burgess
Number Four: Carrie, Samantha Santos
Number Five: Carlito Mendoza
Number Six: Tiffany, Robert O’Malley
Number Seven: Veda, Pranav, Chandra Raja
Number Eight: Tony, Angie Gianluca
Number Nine: Laura, Mark Balous and Annie Patton
Number Ten: Jill, Joseph Richardson
“Wow, this is a great turn out,” I began. For some reason, today I was not so self-conscious speaking in front of the group. “I count twenty-one of us. So, because this was my big idea, I guess I should start off with what my goal for the group is. We all know that, with the best-case scenario, we are not getting out of our houses for seven days. The good news is that we are halfway there. The bad news is we still have halfway to go. If you are like us, your houses are probably getting stuffy, smell and are still a mess from the strikes. We have nicknamed our house the “tomb.” Don’t get me wrong, we love our place, it’s just hard to be stuck here under the circumstances. So, let’s come together three times a week and discuss ideas we have for making life more livable, now and later. Today, let’s just come up with topics. Who has one to get us started?”
“Hi, it’s Carrie. I think one of the hardest things for my wife, Samantha, and I is living without electricity and plumbing.”
“Great, Lizzie is keeping the topic list. Did you get that, Lizzie?” I asked.
“Sure did,” said Lizzie.
“Next?” I asked.
“Hi, I’m Jessica. Food and water. I know that we had time to get ready for this, but we didn’t believe it was going to come to this. Where are the government and army?
“Okay, I hear two topics there. Food and Water is one, and what do we think happened to the government and military is the second. Those are really good. Okay, more topics.”
“Hello, I am Carlito Mendoza. I would like to talk about what we are going to do when we get out. Are we going to vote for people to be in charge?”
“So, you would like to talk about building a governing body of some sort. Then we will add that to the topics,” I said.
“Um, hi, I’m Chandra Raja. Do you think we will be able to go back to school? I know it’s summer, but what about in August? We are supposed to go back in less than a month.”
“So, what should we expect about getting our lives back on track in the near future is your question,” I said. “Will we be able to get back to our schools and jobs? These are all really good topics. I think we need to prioritize these.
“The one that strikes me as something we need to address today is Jessica’s food and water problem. Could you please expand on that, Jessica? What’s going on?”
Jessica’s voice was shaky. “We don’t have enough. I live here with my daughter, her boyfriend and their daughter. The baby’s only two. We make sure that she is getting enough water and food, but she is crying all of the time. It’s just not enough.” I could hear Jessica sobbing.
“It’s not your fault, Mom,” said Shelby. “You see, we were going to go to a Red Cross Station so we didn’t think we needed to have enough for weeks. But when you and Jill came to our house, Laura, you made us decide to get a few more things. It was just too late. When the bombs were all
dropping, we quickly put up some of the plastic from Matt’s construction stuff. You know the stuff they hang and stuff. But it is working, I think. We just kept layering it. We can’t see out the window, there is so much of it. But, yeah, we are hungry. I don’t think we can make it one more week.”
“Let’s keep problem solving this as a group, but when we are done here, stay on and we will go over everything you have, and I will help you to measure out rations,” offered the doctor, Malcolm. “The baby has different needs, and we will go over all of that. If it gets too desperate, we might have to consider you or Matt going out to get some more food from one of our houses. Is there anyone else who is nearing the end of their food and/or water supplies?”
“Hi, this is Angie Gianluca. We are getting close, but we might be alright. Just no longer than a week.”
“I have read that you can drink the water from the water heater,” I said. “They can have between thirty and sixty gallons in them.”
“OH MY GOD,” yelled Shelby. “We have a giant water heater.”
“Yes you can, but you have to be very careful,” Malcolm said.
“I just grabbed Laura’s survival guide,” said Mark. I could see his energy was pumping now. “It says to turn off the circuit breaker first, ha, ha, ha. Matt, since you do construction this should be easy. You have to close the supply valve to keep the water clean…”
“Hi, Matt Harris speaking. I know how to get the water out, but there is usually sediment on the bottom. How do you make the water clean enough to drink?”
“The water should be okay to drink still,” said the Doc. “Let the sediment settle to the bottom, or strain the water through a small strainer. If you can boil the water for at least twenty minutes it should be okay to drink.”
“You can also drink the water from your toilet tank,” I said. Who would have thought that my secret hobby would ever come in handy like this? “I would boil it if I had to use it, though.”
“Mom’s crying, but I know that she would want to thank you all so much. So do I,” said Shelby.
“Also, a human can live without water for three days or maybe more depending on your activity levels. I do recommend that you don’t exert yourselves too much. That will help with the food, too. Angie, will this information help you and Tony?” asked the Doc.
“We can do that. We’re okay,” Angie said.
“Is there anyone else who is concerned about their food and water supplies for the next week or so?” asked the Doc.
There was a pause. Since no one had anything else, I said, “We will continue with this topic and start on some of the others at tomorrow’s meeting. Thank you all for joining us. I hope the next time even more of you will participate in the discussions. Please don’t be shy. This information can literally save your lives. We will make it a goal to cover all of those topics brought up today during our next meetings.
“Laura, can we talk when Malcom is done with the Sheratons?” asked Katie.
“Absolutely, just ring me up ma’ friend,” I said.
Tears filled my eyes at the word “friend,” I am not sure if these friendships are just happening because we are afraid, but I don’t care. I need friends now more than I ever have.”
~~~
I took the walkie-talkie into our bedroom which is finally cleaned up enough for us to sleep in. We plan to sleep there tonight, no matter how cold it is. I need to be in my own bed.
“Hello, Laura. Are you there?” Katie asked.
“I’m right here, Katie. What’s up?” I said. Wow, I sound like I was casually answering my cell phone with a good friend. Now, if I only had texting and email, things might feel a bit more normal.
“I had a couple of things. First, I guess the Kid’s Club meeting didn’t work out very well. They couldn’t get themselves going; at least that’s what Lizzie told me. She was wondering if you and I could sit in on their next meeting,” said Katie with a giggle.
I couldn’t help but laugh. At least kids are still kids.
“Of, course I will. I think they will probably do better when they get together in person. The same with the teenagers,” I offered.
“You are probably right,” Katie said.
“Hey, Laura. The meeting was really good. I think you might have saved the Sheratons, so thank you,” Malcom said.
“I am glad I could help,” I said. I didn’t add that I just wish I had gotten to them earlier when I could have really convinced them to begin to prepare better. When we get out of here, I will make sure that they have everything they need to survive.
“What I wanted to talk to you about is that I plan to check the outside environment earlier than I had said.”
“When?” I asked.
“Thursday,” he said determinedly. “I am going to go out with the Geiger counter and check the levels and make some observations.”
“I have a Geiger counter that I should have been using all along inside, let me…” before I could go any further, I was interrupted by a deep, nasal, male voice. “Neither of you are gonna go out there.”
“Who is that, who’s there?” I asked, my voice rising with every word. This was supposed to be a private conversation. “What the fu…” I screamed. Before I could finish that not-so-clever phraseology, Mark and Annie ran into the room with an excited Hershey at their feet.
“What’s wrong?” Mark asked, his nostrils flaring.
“Who is that?” asked Malcom.
I took my finger away from the button and put my hand over the mic area, like one would do with an old landline so they could not be heard by the person on the other line. Some habits are hard to break.
“I don’t know. Someone has been listening,” I explained to a stunned Mark and Annie. Nowadays it’s much easier to stun people than in the past.
Mark grabbed the walkie before I had a chance to protest. “Who is this?” Mark growled.
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch. My name is Colonel Philip Jackson. I am the Commander of the Language School of Monterey Bay,” he said with authority.
“Say what? Why were you listening to our conversation? It’s none of your damn…” Mark pulled the walkie away from me again.
“Colonel Jackson, if it’s really you, then you know me, don’t you? Tell me something that wouldn’t be common knowledge,” Mark challenged.
“No, I don’t know you in person. You separated from the Army before I took the Command. But I know of you. There’s a framed news article about you hanging right outside of my office. Congratulations on being the first Sudanese soldier. Impressive article and nice picture. I have seen you in person, too. I bought the house across the street. It’s the one hidden on the hillside,” explained Colonel Jackson.
“Yes, sir. I am sorry I questioned you, sir. It is a tense time,” Mark apologized.
“You did exactly as you should have, relax soldier,” said Colonel Jackson.
Malcom chimed in here. “Um, I am not military, and I don’t care about rank. I’m not even sure we should trust you. Why were you listening into our private channel?” demanded Malcom.
“Private channel?” Colonel Jackson chuckled dryly. “Channel thirteen isn’t private. Anyone could be listening right this minute, including the enemy. May I ask why you trust everyone you have been talking to so far? You don’t really know them, do you? I have been listening in since day one. Well, you didn’t start until day two, did you?”
“I believe him, Malcom,” I said. “The fact he knew about the framed article on the wall up at the base is very convincing. We visited the former commander a few years ago and that is exactly where it is. The walls are lined with those types of news articles, but you would have had to have read it to know all of that. I also have seen a man in a big SUV pulling up the driveway right where he said. The man driving it was in uniform. He has gray hair. That’s all I saw of him.”
Colonel Jackson chuckled, amused. “I prefer salt and pepper hair.”
“Fine, so he is who he say
s he is. Why is he eavesdropping? He should have announced his presence,” scolded Malcom.
“Yeah, sorry about that Doc,” he said. “I wanted to make sure you all were legit. You can’t be too careful these days, you know? I also wanted to see how you people interacted, how you decided who would be in charge, who would listen in and not talk, that sort of thing.”
“No one’s in charge, Colonel Jackson,” I corrected.
“Heh, heh, heh. You are in charge, young lady,” he snickered. What a smug son of a bitch.
“No, I’m not. I am just trying to help organize. That’s all,” I said.
“Fine, can we get back to the Doc’s misguided attempt to be a hero and go out there? Like I said, neither of you are going out. I am,” he stated flatly.
“You don’t command us, Jackson. You know, you are rubbing me the wrong way, and I am a very patient man,” Malcom said. He was fuming. “I know what I am looking for, and you don’t.”
“Heh, and the Commander of a base hasn’t been trained for this? Doc, we can’t afford to lose our only doctor if it’s bad out there. And Laura, you’re a filmmaker who happens to have a Geiger counter. That hardly makes you an expert in air quality during a biochemical war, does it? Besides, you are the leader here, and we need to keep you safe,” he said.
I was steaming at this point. Mark shot me a cautious glance as I raised the radio to speak. “I am not the leader. I told you that,” I spoke out venomously.
“Yeah, okay, heh, heh, heh,” he chuckled.
What is up with that ‘heh’? It’s ridiculous.
“You’re the commander, so you are in charge.” I have never heard myself sound so childish. Whatever.
“Naa, you are,” he continued before I could get a word in edgewise. “As I was saying, I’m going out. We are all in the dark here, literally. We have no idea what’s going on out there. Maybe everything is just fine and life is going on like normal, and we are the fools who have boarded ourselves indoors. Have you thought of that?”
No, I hadn’t actually.
“Colonel, you and I both know the answer to that,” Malcom said.