by Helen Brooks
'All alone, m'dear?'
She just managed to stifle the groan of irritation as she heard Monty behind her and felt his damp hand on her arm as he turned her to face him.
'Care for a little dance with old Monty, then?' he asked her loudly, his red moist face looking as though it was ready to explode.
She had already danced with him a couple of times and had no wish to repeat the experience; the second time she had had her work cut out to keep his big thick hands from wandering. 'I'm looking for Quinn, actually,' she said with a polite smile. 'He was going to fetch two platefuls of that wonderful buffet you've provided.'
'You don't want to worry about Quinn, m'dear.' The heavily perspiring face moved closer to Candy's and Monty's voice was loudly confidential when he said, 'Joanna's looking after him, if you know what I mean.'
'I don't think I do.'
'They've had a little thing going for months on the quiet,' Monty continued affably, not at all put out by Candy's cool tone. 'Joanna told me herself—confidentially, you know?' He tapped the side of his greasy nose as he winked at her. 'And she also let on you've been asking about me, so no need to be shy, m'dear. I'm all for the modern way of doing things. Bit of variety is the spice of life and all that, eh?'
He was suggesting she and Quinn swop partners for the night with himself and Joanna? Candy stared at the grinning, amiable face in front of her. It was completely without malice or bashfulness; Joanna had obviously led him to believe his suggestion would be welcomed with open arms. Or perhaps the ice-cool blonde hadn't intended Monty to be quite so bald in his approach? Whatever, she had to put him right, and quickly. And then she found she didn't have to.
'I'm afraid Joanna has been taking a walk in cloud-cuckoo-land again.' Quinn's voice was like a steel blade behind Monty, and as Monty turned Candy saw Quinn had Joanna at the side of him. The beautiful blonde's face was scarlet with rage. 'I've just put her straight on a few things, and while we're on the subject I'd like to make it clear that Joanna and I have never been an item, Monty. Okay?' Quinn gave a smile that wasn't a genuine smile at all. 'So Joanna is all yours. And Candy—' here Quinn deliberately allowed his eyes to stroke Candy's flushed face '—is all mine.'
'Oh, I see.' The warning in Quinn's voice was obvious even to Monty. 'Ticketyboo, old man. Ticketyboo.'
'And we believe in fidelity. Isn't that right, sweetheart?'
Quinn held her gaze, his black eyes glittering. 'Both now and later, when we're married.'
Candy heard Joanna's sudden intake of breath and Monty's confused, 'Married?' but she was struggling with her own set of emotions, the chief being one of furious outrage. How dared he take this ridiculous farce so far? she asked herself angrily. Posing as his girlfriend was bad enough, but to announce to all and sundry they were intending to make it permanent was going beyond the call of duty. He could think of some other way to ward off Joanna Embleton-White because she had had enough. More than enough!
'So…' Joanna's gaze held all the warmth of an arctic winter. 'Do we take it congratulations are in order?' the slim blonde asked tightly, looking straight at Candy.
Candy didn't know what to say, but she summoned up a fairly bright smile from somewhere and wished Quinn Ellington to a place that was very hot and very final. 'Nothing is decided yet,' she managed at last, 'so perhaps congratulations are presumptuous.'
'Nonsense, darling.' Quinn was going for the Oscar. 'I want that band of gold on your finger as soon as possible and you know it.' He turned his dark gaze on Monty as he drawled easily, 'Can you blame me?'
'Not at all,' Monty responded gallantly, with an uneasy glance at Joanna's white, tight-lipped face. 'Quite understandable, old man.'
'I think so,' Quinn agreed with silky aplomb. 'And now, if you'll excuse me, I want to make sure my fiancée has something to eat. I'm sure we'll catch up with you later.'
Candy was so furious she didn't trust herself to say a word, steadfastly keeping her mouth shut as Quinn led her across the room and out into the hall towards the dining room where the sumptuous buffet reposed. But Quinn didn't lead her into the high ceilinged, wood-panelled dining room, as she had expected; instead he suddenly pulled her through a door to their left and Candy found herself in a large, book-lined study as Quinn flicked on the light and shut the door behind them.
'Calm down and hear me out before you say anything.'
Candy's head shot up as Quinn spoke, her vivid blue eyes shooting sparks and her soft mouth straight and taut. 'Nothing, nothing you could say would excuse such total, absolute arrogance, Quinn,' she snapped vehemently. 'How you could have the effrontery, the gall to stand there and tell them we're going to be married is beyond me!'
He was standing with his back against the door, leaning in a casual pose with his arms folded across his chest and his handsome head slightly tilted as he surveyed her wild expression. 'I was completely out of line. I know it,' he admitted calmly.
'Do you?' She was so angry she could have spit. 'Big deal! Why I didn't tell them you are an out-and-out liar I really don't know. I should have.'
'You didn't let me down in front of Joanna and Monty and the rest of them who were close enough to eavesdrop because you aren't like that,' Quinn said with unforgivable composure.
'You think I'm a fool, is that it?' she shot back hotly.
'No, that is not it.' His hand had clamped on to her wrist as she had made to turn away from him, hurt beyond measure, and now he took her upper arms in his hands, his fingers biting into her flesh as she struggled to break free. 'That's the last thing I think you are.'
'I don't believe you.'
'Then I'll have to convince you, won't I?' He had seen the telltale glimmer of tears deep in the sapphire eyes and his voice had gentled accordingly. 'I think you're pretty terrific, if you want to know, and I don't see any reason why we can't make my declaration a reality. We get on well, we each have our separate careers, so we're not likely to tread on each other's toes or get bored, and I'd bet my life we'd be more than compatible sexually…if you wanted that to be part of the deal. Of course that could happen at your own pace, when you're ready.'
'I don't believe I'm hearing this.'
She was staring at him as though he had lost his mind, and maybe he had, Quinn thought soberly, but he had had enough of Monty and the like pawing her about as though she was like the rest of the butterfly types who flitted in and out of their social scene. He'd wanted to do murder half the night.
'Why?' he asked calmly. 'I'm expanding the practice and a wife would be very useful to me. Dinner parties, entertaining—it is all so much easier with a hostess, besides which I'm tired of the Joannas of this world and their demands. You've had more than enough of the so-called love element to last you a lifetime, and so have I. And I would make sure you don't lose out on the deal. I am financially independent due to investments and other business deals; we'd live well. I could build you a wonderful studio at the back of the house—'
'Quinn!' She interrupted him before he could say any more. 'Quinn, we don't love each other.' Or you don't love me, more to the point.
'Exactly.' He smiled at her as though she had agreed to this ridiculous proposal. 'That's why it would work so well, don't you see? I've done the love thing and it's a killer, as your experience with Harper must have told you. But why should the past prevent us from enjoying life in a partnership in the future? The benefits are numerous. Think about it We can be happy together knowing there are no great expectations on the other party; we can have fun, help each other out; my name and the ring on your finger will protect you from the Monty creeps and we can be friends too. Many couples go through life without that ingredient, Candy.'
She remembered what his mother had said and eyed him helplessly. She was the only woman he had ever had a friendship with. Surely that boded well? And then she caught the thought frantically, shocked that she was even considering such a crazy notion. She couldn't agree to marry Quinn. The mere idea was emotional suicide.
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br /> 'It wouldn't work. You must know that,' she said with deliberate casualness. He mustn't guess what this conversation was doing to her; the way her pulse was racing and her heart was pounding.
'On the contrary, I think it would work very well.' His dark eyes ran over her face and the mass of silky red hair. 'Marriages of convenience have happened from the beginning of time, and it's on record that they are more successful than so-called love matches.'
'So that's what this is, a convenient proposal?' Candy said flatly.
'I guess.' His eyes narrowed and he drew her closer. 'But I would satisfy you, Candy, in every way. Have no doubts about that.'
She didn't! Her tongue touched her lower lip and the pounding of her heart increased. He was offering her marriage! Quinn! He didn't love her—he would probably run a mile if he guessed her true feelings for him—but the impossible, the unthinkable had happened and he had asked her to marry him. She would never have a chance like this again.
If she said no she would be committing herself to a life of aloneness; she knew that She would never find another man like Quinn—he was unique. True, she would have her work and friends, but did she really want to grow old with just the cats for company? There were some career women who flitted from one affair to another without letting anything affect them too deeply, but she wasn't like that.
And if she said yes? The thumping of her heart made her feel faint Then she would be at Quinn's side, close to him, sharing all the small, intimate things that no one else would have the right to share. Maybe he would grow to love her? With time? But if he didn't would she be able to stand remaining on the perimeter of his heart?
And then the decision was made for her when Quinn bent his head and kissed her hungrily, his thighs hard against hers and his mouth sensuous.
He took his time, his mouth exploring hers with exquisite finesse until she was liquid heat in his arms, but still his lovemaking was controlled and restrained as he slowly fed her desire.
She knew what he was doing, knew he was using his considerable sexual experience to persuade and manipulate her to his will, but it didn't make any difference. She was just like all the others, she admitted painfully. She couldn't resist him. He was all-male, enigmatic and fascinating and so, so sensual, and she would never meet another man who could make her feel like this with such little effort.
She drew on all her resources and tried one last time to remain above water. 'Don't!' She wrenched her mouth away from his as she spoke, her voice trembling. 'Quinn, you have to see that this is crazy. What if either of us fall in love with someone else, what then? And this is so coldblooded—'
'I'm not cold, Candy.' He took one of her hands and deliberately carried it to a certain part of his anatomy which was rock-hard. 'Does that feel as though I'm cold?' he asked brusquely into her shocked eyes. 'I want you and I can make you want me, but, like I said, you can take all the time you need on the physical side of things.'
She would need about two seconds flat, she thought with dark ruefulness. He only had to touch her and she was his, if he did but know it.
'And what if either of us meet someone else?' she persisted as she looked up into his handsome face. 'What then?'
'That won't happen so it isn't a relevant possibility,' Quinn said with magnificent arrogance. 'I shall make sure you have everything you need from me.'
Everything but love. For an awful moment she thought she had said it out loud, but the sound filling her ears was the thud thud of her racing heart. 'But you might fall in love,' she said shakily. 'There would be two in this marriage, remember.'
'No, I won't, Candy,' He drew her against him again, nuzzling the silk of her hair as he said over the top of her head, 'I have enough antibodies from the disease to guarantee that.'
'Laura?' she asked faintly against the hard wall of his chest.
'Laura,' he agreed after a moment's tense silence. And then he began to talk. 'From the first day I met Laura we were inseparable,' he said quietly, 'but it wasn't until later, much, much later, that I realised she had done all the running. She was a terribly jealous woman. No—' he shook his head abruptly '—it was more than that. She was obsessional, unbalanced about me, but I didn't understand how it was at first. I cared about her, very much, and she was beautiful and vivacious and alive—so alive. By the time I began to question the rows that would result if I so much as glanced or smiled at another female Laura was pregnant.'
'Quinn, you don't have to tell me this.'
'Shush.' He drew her close again as she tried to lean back and look up into his face, and only when she relaxed against his chest did he continue. 'We were married within the month and on our honeymoon she admitted she'd done it on purpose because she was scared of losing me. I didn't know how I felt—angry, I guess, guilty because I made her feel so insecure and unhappy, trapped. But I still loved her and I was determined the marriage would work.'
He sighed, a deep shudder that came from some dark place within. 'It got so I was careful never to touch or even look at another woman, not even friends I'd known for donkey's years. We stopped going out to dinner because of the scenes that would inevitably result when we got home again, but I kept telling myself when the baby was born she'd feel better. More confident again, reassured of her beauty and figure. She hated being pregnant, loathed every minute of it, although I kept telling her she was more beautiful than ever and I meant it.'
'And when the baby was born?' Candy asked softly, and this time he allowed her to move back in his arms. 'What then?' she pressed gently as she looked into his tortured face.
'It was a difficult birth, and at first everyone blamed that on her inability to bond with our son.' The words were being torn out of him now, wrenched up and ground out through clenched teeth. 'I wouldn't let myself believe she was jealous of him and my feeling for my own son, but as weeks and months went by she made all our lives into a living hell. I insisted she went to a doctor, a psychiatrist, but it didn't help, and it got so I was frightened to leave her alone with him when I was at work. I hired a nanny— a woman old enough to be my mother who looked like the back of a bus—but she left after a few weeks when Laura accused her of sleeping with me. We were on our third nanny when I got a phone call one day. Laura had attacked the woman, who was fifty-five and very happily married with a brood of children and grandchildren, because of our 'affair'.'
'Oh, Quinn.' She didn't know what to say to erase the agony on his face.
'The nanny had tried to stop Laura leaving with my son after she'd fended her off, but by the time I got home it was too late. According to the police Laura must have taken a bend too quickly, which caused her to go off the road into the river, but…I've always wondered.' He shut his eyes briefly, then opened them as he said, 'Anyway, she went through the wall of the bridge and into the water and drowned them both. Joe wasn't even twelve months old.'
She wanted to take his face in her hands and smother him with kisses. She wanted to tell him she would make it all right, that she would love him enough for both of them, that she would heal all the pain and misery if it took her the rest of her life. But instead she stood quietly looking up at him and took a deep breath. She was on the edge of a precipice and she was going to jump off. She might be borne up on the breath of the future and learn to soar and fly, or she might be dashed to pieces on the rocks of the past She had no way of knowing, because the end result rested with the tall, devastatingly handsome man in front of her.
But what she did know was that there had never really been any question as to the nature of her reply. She loved him. It was as simple as that. And she was scared to death.
'So…' Quinn looked down at her with midnight-black eyes in which there wasn't a trace of the usual cynicism and hardness. 'If you marry me it will be the traditional 'till death us do part'. Is that a problem?'
She took another deep breath and leapt into space. 'No, that's not a problem,' she said in a surprisingly steady voice, and lifted her face for his kiss.
>
CHAPTER EIGHT
The next few months were ones of hectic activity. When Quinn had placed the exquisite diamond and sapphire star on Candy's finger on New Year's Eve he'd made it clear he envisaged a spring wedding, but within the week her agent had confirmed a small exhibition of her work in London for the end of April.
She had expected Quinn to object to the timing when she told him the news, but he had merely nodded slowly, his eyes narrowing, and had drawled, 'Fine. Excellent opportunity for you to get established here now it's going to be your permanent home. We'll set the wedding date for the middle of May, and apart from your dress and so on you can leave all the arrangements to me and concentrate on the exhibition. Okay?'
'But it means I'm going to be working flat out to get ready in time. You do understand that?' she had said quietly.
'Of course.' His tone had been almost distant, as though the last thing that concerned him was the possibility that he wouldn't see much of her, and it had caused Candy's chin to rise a notch and her mouth to tighten.
Fine. If he didn't care about not seeing her she was blowed if she would care about not seeing him either! But of course it didn't work like that in practice.
She had expected, once they were officially engaged, that Quinn would assume it entitled him to full seduction rights, but if anything, on the one or two occasions their busy schedules allowed them to meet each week, he was more distant and controlled than he had been before the engagement.
It didn't seem to worry him at all that they were ships that passed in the night, but it caused Candy many sleepless nights of tossing and turning, especially if she had seen him that evening.
Candy knew, taking into account all she had revealed about her past and the way she had rejected his physical advances, that she ought to be appreciative of his restraint and command of his physical desire, but she wasn't.