“Okay, we are so done with the emotional crap.” Luke made a sweeping motion with his hand. “Let’s eat and have fun.”
They ate muffins and drank coffee and juice, debating options for spending the rest of the morning together, and finally settled on the short drive up the coast to the Piedras Blancas elephant seal rookery, one of Summer’s favorite places. She found watching the seals oddly comforting. They always did exactly what they were supposed to do, what was best for them as individuals and as a species. The human race could take lessons.
Route 1 took them along the coast, through small towns and past surf-pummeled rocks and beaches. Summer was driving her car after she found out Luke had gotten a ride to her house from a friend of Zac’s. He must have been quite sure she’d forgive him, or he’d have had to walk a long way home.
At the rookery, they parked in the designated lot and followed the crowd onto the viewing platform set over the beach, where the animals lay by the dozens, females and pups and bulls, an impressive mass of life crowding the sand.
“I’m warning you, Luke.” Summer gestured to the animals. “It’s mating season. You might see some crazy action.”
“No way.” Luke surveyed the animals beneath them. “But they have babies now.”
“They’re just weaned. Then the bulls have to impregnate the females for next season.”
“A man’s work is never done.”
“Ha!” Summer snorted. “The females are the ones doing all the work. Those pups gain ten pounds a day.”
“Yeah?” Luke stepped closer and they listened to the deep belches of the males, the croaks of the moms and the high-pitched barks of the weaned pups, their arms touching. “So who did the housework in your family? Your mom? Did your dad help?”
Summer stiffened, then made herself relax. For better or worse, she had come to trust Luke a lot more, and he might as well know where she came from. “My parents had a pretty traditional work split.”
When they did any work.
“Hey, sorry, I forgot you don’t like talking about your family.” He turned to her, wind tousling his hair, his full mouth slightly pursed. “Never mind, then.”
“It’s okay.” She had no idea why now, when they were standing near seals—which, face it, smelled really terrible—she was suddenly fantasizing about Luke kissing her. “I don’t mind so much now.”
“No? That’s cool. Thanks, Summer.” He smiled and nudged her with his shoulder. “My dad did everything. You know, Mom would have had a hard time helping, being dead and all.”
“Luke.” She was horrified. “You can’t joke about that.”
“Sure I can. But I know, that was bad.” He put his arm around her for a brief squeeze. “Sometimes you get so sick of the pain that humor is a relief.”
She nodded, her shock dissolving into sympathy. “There are probably as many ways of dealing with grief as there are people dealing with it.”
“Probably. How do you cope?”
Summer frowned. She was grieving the pleasant carefree childhood she never got. Parents who would love her and sacrifice for her, who’d try hard not to spoil her and secretly enjoy it when they failed. Who cared enough about being good role models to keep trying when their efforts fell short. “I’ve never thought about it.”
“What do you do when you’re sad?”
“I go for a run. Or I clean. Mostly I clean.” She laughed. “Doesn’t that make me sound exciting?”
“Whoa, yeah, you are one crazy girl.” He nudged her again. “Trust me, it’s healthier than acting out.”
“Look.” Summer pointed. One of the enormous bulls, trunklike nose swinging, was heaving his incredible bulk along the sand at an astounding speed, chasing a squealing female, who was trying as hard as possible to get away from him.
“Aw, isn’t that sweet.” Luke cracked up, leaning into Summer to get a better view. “So romantic, huh? Look at her go!”
Summer giggled. “If someone was coming after me like that I’d run, too.”
“How about if I was chasing after you?”
Oh, gosh. Just when she was about to go giddy at the thought of Luke trying to seduce her, he winked. She reminded herself that this was his autoflirt mechanism, not to be taken seriously.
“Hmm.” She pretended to consider the concept. “Nope. Wouldn’t work. It’s not my style.”
“It does lack subtlety.”
“Have you ever had a serious girlfriend?”
He burst out laughing, harder than she’d ever seen him.
“What?” She had no idea what was so funny. “What did I say?”
“Sorry.” He got himself under control. “It’s just that you asked me that right after I talked about chasing you like a horny elephant seal. Like, ‘Seriously, Luke? Have you ever even had a girlfriend?’”
Summer cracked up. “No, I definitely didn’t mean that.”
“To answer your question, no.” He turned back to the seals, blushing. “I’ve dated around, nothing has ever really stuck. I probably need to grow up.”
His admission surprised her. “Well, you have time. It’s not like you’re fifty and still haven’t.”
“What about you?”
“Do I need to grow up?” She’d had to grow up way too soon. “No, I’m perfect.”
“How nice for you. I was talking about boyfriends.”
“I had a couple. I mentioned them before. They were a little...rough.”
His head jerked around, all laughter gone from his face. “With you?”
“No, no, not like that.” She got a thrill from his protectiveness, even knowing she could take care of herself just fine, and pretty much always had. “One sold drugs. The other one stole. Took me a while to catch on, then when I did, I got out. That was it for me as far as boyfriends. Double fail.”
“Well, you know, Summer, you still have time. It’s not like you’re fifty.”
“So true!” She watched the seals cooling themselves, using their flippers to toss sand onto their backs, though the air was a pleasant temperature to her. Everything was pleasant to her right now. She was starting to realize how lonely she’d been without realizing it, keeping herself frenetically busy to hide the fact that she didn’t have an intimate relationship in her life. Certainly not with her family after she’d moved out. As far as they were concerned, she was either selfish or a traitor or both. And she’d hardly seen Janine since she got her new boyfriend months ago.
“So you want to go somewhere that smells better?”
“Sure.” She turned with Luke to walk back to the car. “Has Zac taken you to Hearst Castle yet?”
“Um, no. Not yet.” He was speaking carefully.
“Not in the mood for a castle?”
“Honestly, Summer?” He touched her arm. “I just want to hang out with you somewhere we don’t have to think about anything else. Like on a beach that doesn’t smell like a seal sewer. Or at a coffee shop that isn’t Slow Pour. Or, I don’t know...”
“All of that sounds nice.” Her voice came out low and shy.
“Cool.” He took her hand and her heart started beating faster again, plus a funny pressure swelled in her chest. She guessed it was just going to be that way around him until her infatuation faded or he broke her heart.
“Thank you for coming over today, Luke. I would have been too proud and too stubborn to apologize first. Seems like a stupid waste of time now.” She liked the way his hand felt wrapped around hers. Such a little thing but it carried big emotional weight. “Though if you’d come into Slow Pour while I was working, I wouldn’t have been able to stay mad for long.”
“Yeah, well, maybe I am growing up a little.” He moved away to smile at her, stretching their arms, then came back closer.
“Not always a bad thing.” Summer smiled back. The pressure in her chest increased, and she suddenly understood exactly what it was.
She wanted to tell him her secret. She trusted him that much.
“I’m studying p
sychology. In case you wanted to know. As soon as I can I’m going to enroll full-time at Cal Poly.” Her words rushed out and she was immediately anxious, as if she’d done something terrible and irrevocable, like push someone off a cliff.
“That’s great.” He squeezed her hand. “Good for you.”
And...
That was it.
Summer nearly laughed. Why had she thought telling Luke would be a big deal? She might as well have told him what she had for breakfast, or that she was thinking of changing her hairstyle. Everyone went to college in his world. He had no reason to think she was extraordinary or daring to accomplish it in hers.
He’d also therefore have no reason to mock her, or to tell her she couldn’t possibly make it through the program. He had no reason to expect her to fail.
And it hit her that some of her attraction to this charming, funny man-boy was that around Luke, she already felt like the woman she wanted to become.
10
COLD. WHY WAS his room so cold? Zac reached for the extra blanket he kept at the bottom of his bed.
No blanket.
What was that noise?
He opened one eye. It was barely light outside.
He blinked to clear his vision and focused on...mmm, a female breast. Waves tumbled gently onto the sand behind him. His lips curved in a smile.
Oh, yeah.
He moved closer to Chris, who turned away, curling up against him.
Last night had been everything he’d fantasized and more. He’d been able to cut nearly all the way through the weird straitjacket she’d strapped herself into and connect to the fiery, funny woman he was so crazy about.
She’d cut through his straitjacket, too. Lying with her after having one of the most astounding orgasms of his life, he’d been able to open up a little, tell her something of what he was feeling, with amazing results: it hadn’t killed him.
What’s more, she was still here, so he hadn’t scared her away. Now he was daring to hope his plan was going to work, that under the guise of a casual fling Chris would discover her feelings ran deeper than she thought. Maybe deep enough to keep the relationship going long-distance, or, if he got into Columbia, very short-distance.
That was the dream, anyway. He was getting way ahead of where they were now. He should take a page from her Zen book and concentrate on the moment.
Like that her hair smelled faintly of flowers.
Like that her legs were tangled with his.
Like that her incredibly firm and shapely ass was pressed against his groin.
He should let her sleep, but...
She stirred, letting out a faint whimper, then adjusted her body more firmly against his.
Zac stifled a groan. His flesh was definitely willing. Come to think of it, so was his spirit.
He moved his hand in a slow caress up her stomach, covering one of her beautiful breasts, feeling the nipple harden against his palm.
She whimpered again.
Drawing his hand down her stomach, he threaded his fingers into the curls between her legs. She stiffened in his arms.
“Good morning.” He pushed into the dampness he’d tasted and thrust into and adored over most of the night.
“Mmmph.”
He grinned, wondering if she was always slow to start in the mornings. So much he didn’t know about her, so much he wanted to find out. “Did you sleep well?”
“Mmm-hmm.”
He singled out her clitoris with the tip of one finger and circled it slowly.
“Zac.”
“Yes, Chris.” His finger moved farther into her, encountering moisture, which made his cock harden even more painfully.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m saying good morning.”
“That’s how you do it?” He could hear the smile in her voice, which only encouraged his exploration, while his cock was reduced to begging.
“Why, is there another way?”
“Jeez.” She giggled. “You are such a guy.”
His finger, slippery from her wetness, found and circled her clitoris again. “Want me to change?”
“Mmm, no, don’t change.” She arched back against him. He slid his penis into the gap at the top of her thighs, pushing to rub back and forth against her sex, making both of them groan at the pleasure. “I like you the way you are.”
“’Kay.” He couldn’t handle more than one syllable. She’d started playing with her own breasts, stroking them, manipulating her nipples, and it was making him a little nuts.
“Zac.”
“Whuh?”
She giggled, squeezing her thighs together, practically making his eyes roll back in his head. “Trouble speaking, dear?”
“Mhripghtp.”
She rolled onto her stomach, grabbed a pillow and pushed it under her hips, tilting that gorgeous ass up high. There was enough dawn light to see darkness between her firm, shapely cheeks. “Maybe this will help?”
He groaned involuntarily, grabbed a condom from their depleted stash under the pillow—which, thankfully, hadn’t been disturbed during the night—and had it on in record time.
“Brr. It’s cold, Zac.” She pretended to shiver, her voice low and sultry. “Warm me up.”
“Ungh.” He was on his knees between her thighs already, one hand on her hip, the other on his erection, ready to guide it into heaven.
She arched her back, tipping her pelvis farther toward him. He brought his cock to her soft lips and rubbed up and down the pink crevice, loving the sounds she made, the way she wiggled back toward him, pushing her bottom higher, wanting him inside her.
Applying gentle pressure, he watched his cock slowly disappear, inch by inch, her inner walls squeezing him, until he was fully inside. Oh, man. He stopped there, breathing fast, loving this moment of total connection before movement would escalate his lust toward its inevitable explosion and retreat.
Chris turned and met his eyes, hers shadowed by near darkness that turned her soft beauty mysterious and enticing. Tenderness mixed with desire so strongly he could only gaze back at her, wondering if she was the love of his life and what the hell he would do if she was.
Then she tossed her head so her hair swung over one perfect naked shoulder, pulling her hips forward and back, and desire won. He moved inside her, pleasuring her, pleasuring himself, wishing he was lying over her, gazing deeply into her eyes, able to tell her everything he felt.
Still too soon.
Frustration made him push harder, jolting her body. She rose up onto her arms, meeting his thrusts, uttering guttural cries that fueled his excitement until he was afraid he’d spin out of control.
“Zac.” Her hand moved between her legs. She rubbed frantically as he pumped her until she stiffened and gasped. Immediately he stopped holding back, let the orgasm sweep over him, aware of her muscles contracting around him as she came with him, aware of the softness of her skin, the fresh cool air around them, the regular splash and gurgle of the waves, wanting to capture and hold every aspect of the moment close in his memory.
Slowly he came down, regretfully, knowing they’d have to pack up and leave soon, leave behind this perfect bubble of passion and togetherness.
He pulled out of her, wanting Chris in his arms, face-to-face, wanting to ask what she was feeling, if her emotions had changed after their amazing night together.
Of course he did nothing like that, just gathered her to him and lay there as if he was only experiencing oh-baby-you-were-great afterglow.
“Mmm, Mr. Arnette, I have to say the benefits of being your friend are con-sid-erable.”
He forced a laugh at the unintentional jab. In his view, what they’d shared had taken them way beyond friends. Even friends who were lovers. But he’d have to be patient. “Yeah? Think you might want to be this friendly again sometime?”
“Most definitely.” She did sound happier and more relaxed than he’d heard her in a long time. “I love doing this with you. It’s like... It’s so...
”
He waited eagerly. Fantastic? Incredible? Life changing?
“Nonthreatening.”
Ouch. “Uh...yeah, wow, Chris. Every guy’s dream after a long night of sex is to be told he’s not threatening.”
“I’m serious.” She stretched luxuriously, making him want to pounce on her again. “I feel so comfortable with you. Like, amazingly comfortable.”
He smiled. Of course she did. Because they were really, really good together. “Why do you think that is?”
Chris narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “You’re smirking again. That means there’s something going on in your head that you’re not telling me.”
“No, no, nothing like that.” He made his smile as innocent as possible. “Go on.”
“Well...a couple of things. First, I know you’ll laugh, but I do think my experience at the Peace, Love and Joy Center has changed me.”
Zac gritted his teeth. She was giving credit for how good they were together to some New Age BS yoga studio?
“And in this situation with you, I don’t feel any expectations I have to live up to. I don’t have to be the perfect partner.”
His irritation dissolved into protective sympathy that any guy had made her feel that way—or even that she had to feel that way all on her own. He liked things black, white and organized. You needed clean water in a village. If there wasn’t any, you found a way to bring it in. If you had storm overflow too often, you found new places for the water to go. But Chris’s brain seemed to have much more complex reactions. It was obvious she’d struggled through life a great deal more than her outward control and competence let on.
“Of course you don’t need to be perfect.” He stroked her hair, keeping his voice light. “Perfection is boring.”
“You think so?” She sighed. “I’m a perfectionist. Always have been. My parents, too. Eva was the lucky one in the family. She was sloppy and careless and fun from the moment she was born. She surprised and enchanted people. I have always felt completely predictable beside her. But then, that’s what my parents raised me to be.”
Zac nodded, wanting to ride in on his white horse and slay her demons. But he knew she’d have to put those to rest by herself. “I had a best friend growing up who was incredibly charming and passionate and cool. So I know that feeling. Next to him I was the too-big, slow-moving dork.”
The Perfect Indulgence Page 12