‘It was my wish too.’ Her tone was flat all of a sudden and it worried him.
‘Was? It isn’t what you want now?’
‘Yes, it’s what I want. However, I am realistic enough to know that we can’t always have what we want.’ She looked round when a knock on the door heralded the return of the nurses. ‘We need to talk, Khalid, but we can’t do so here. Peter knows where I’m staying—you can get the details from him when you’re ready to meet up and discuss where we go from here.’
‘I thought that was obvious,’ he shot back, unbearably hurt by her attitude. Didn’t she want him in her life—was that what she was saying? Had telling him about the baby been purely a token gesture born out of a sense of duty and nothing more? The thought turned his flesh to ice.
‘Nothing is obvious in this situation,’ she said quietly. ‘We just have to do what is right for all of us, and especially what is right for our child.’
She stood up and went to the door, ignoring him when he ordered her to stop. The two nurses, closely followed by his doctor, hurried into the room as Sam left. Khalid allowed them to fuss around him, re-attaching the leads, checking the monitors, performing all the tasks that he would have insisted on in their position. It was less giving in gracefully than lack of interest that made him so compliant. He didn’t care what they did; he only cared about Sam and what she was thinking. Feeling. Planning. He couldn’t bear the thought that his whole future might lie in her hands and that there was nothing he could do about it!
He took a deep breath after the medics left then calmly detached all the leads once more. Ignoring the monitor, which was beeping like crazy, he got out of bed. He wasn’t going to lie here and wait for Sam to reach a decision. No way! He was going to fight for what he wanted. Fight for her and his child and fight tooth and nail too. Sam could find that she had a bigger battle on her hands than she had anticipated but so long as she was happy with the outcome they would both be winners.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
SAM WENT STRAIGHT to her room after Peter dropped her off at the hotel. Jess had wanted her to go home with her but Sam had refused the well-intentioned offer. She needed to be by herself so she could work out what she should do. It would be so easy to get carried away by Khalid’s declarations but deep down she knew it wasn’t that simple. Yes, she loved him, and, yes, it appeared that he loved her too; however, she needed to think very carefully about the repercussions it could cause if she agreed to stay with him.
She made herself a cup of coffee and sat by the window to drink it, watching the sunlight reflecting off the modern high-rise towers that comprised this part of the city. Khalid had told her that Azad was changing and it was, but the old values still held firm. How would it affect Khalid if they married and the Azadian people found out about her family? Would it blight him in their eyes, make his position as a member of the ruling family untenable?
He hadn’t mentioned marriage, granted, but she knew he would and that was something else she needed to think about. Khalid had a strongly developed sense of honour, so how could she be sure that he wouldn’t offer to marry her simply because she was carrying his child? She couldn’t bear to think that his life might be blighted because he wanted to do the right thing, couldn’t bear to know that his feelings for her weren’t as all-encompassing as hers were for him. It would be better for them to part than to live her life knowing that he was with her out of a sense of duty.
Sam’s heart was heavy as she stood up and put her cup on the table. She had done what she had set out to do and told Khalid about the baby. There was no reason for her to stay.
* * *
As soon as Khalid was dressed, he phoned Peter and asked him where Sam was staying. Once he had the address, he summoned his driver and told the man to take him to her hotel. His impromptu departure from the hospital caused an uproar but he brushed aside the doctor’s protests. This was far more important than anything else, far more urgent. Maybe he was mistaken but he had a nasty feeling that if he didn’t go and find Sam immediately, she would do something stupid.
He sat on the edge of his seat as the car swept through the busy downtown traffic. When they drew up in the hotel’s forecourt he had the door open before his driver could stop the engine. He strode across the foyer and made his way straight to the reception desk. The receptionist blanched when she recognised him but Khalid ignored her discomfort as he demanded to know which room Miss Warren was in. His heart sank when the woman haltingly explained that Miss Warren had checked out and was on her way to the airport.
Khalid returned to his car and told the driver to take him to the airport. Peter had given him Sam’s mobile phone number so he tried calling it but it went straight to voice mail. He tried the airlines next and discovered that there was a flight leaving for London in less than an hour’s time. He could only assume that she was booked on it.
The drive to the airport seemed never-ending. Khalid could feel his tension mounting as the minutes ticked past. When they finally arrived, he could barely contain himself as he leapt from the car and ran into the terminal. International flights went from Terminal Two so he raced across the concourse, taking the escalator steps two at a time. Sam’s flight was boarding and once she got on the plane that would be it; he wouldn’t be able to follow her unless he had a ticket...
Cursing his own stupidity, he veered off towards the booking hall. Thankfully, there wasn’t a queue and he was able to purchase a first-class ticket for the London flight. A glimpse of his passport immediately afforded him VIP status and he was rushed through the various channels. Five minutes later he was boarding the plane. Now all he had to do was find Sam and talk to her, make her understand that they could work this out.
He grimaced. That was all?
* * *
Sam watched as the ground fell away. Tears were stinging her eyes but she blinked them away. She had done the right thing even though it didn’t feel like it at this moment. If she had stayed and allowed Khalid to persuade her they could have a future together, she would have regretted it. She loved him too much to risk hurting him. It was better to let him go than live with that constant fear in her mind. She would let him see the baby—there was no question about that. However, she wouldn’t tie him to her, wouldn’t allow his life to be adversely affected in any way.
The plane levelled off and people started to move about when the seat-belt sign went out. When someone stopped beside her seat, Sam didn’t look up, simply assuming that it was a passenger wanting to retrieve something from the overhead locker.
She wasn’t prepared in any way when a familiar deep voice said quietly beside her, ‘Hello, Sam.’
‘Khalid!’ Sam’s hand flew to her mouth to stifle her gasp as she stared up at him. He smiled thinly but she could see the anger in his eyes and knew that he was less than pleased by her hasty departure.
‘The very same. Obviously you didn’t expect to see me so soon. I apologise if I’ve upset your plans.’
‘What are you doing here?’ she asked, her voice quavering with shock. She took a steadying breath but it didn’t help, didn’t do anything to quieten her racing heart. Maybe it was foolish but the fact that Khalid had followed her had to mean something, surely?
‘You said we needed to talk and I agree with you.’ He gave a little shrug. ‘I didn’t imagine we were going to have that conversation on a plane but needs must.’
Sam glanced along the row of seats and flushed when she realised that they were attracting a great deal of interest. It was obvious that several of the passengers had recognised Khalid and that was simply exacerbating the problem. The thought of them having an in-depth discussion about the baby with all these people listening was more than she could bear.
‘This is hardly the best place to talk,’ she began but he cut her off.
‘I agree. It isn’t.’ He stepped back, his
brows arching as he nodded to the first-class cabin. ‘Come. There’s more room up there. We can talk in private.’
‘Oh, but I haven’t got a ticket for First Class,’ she protested, desperately playing for time. It had been such a shock to see Khalid and she needed to work out what she should say to him, muster up all the arguments she could to make him understand that it wasn’t possible for them to be together.
‘That isn’t a problem. I shall take care of it.’
Sam could tell from his tone that he wasn’t going to be deterred. He intended to talk to her about the baby and what would happen in the future and nothing she could say would stop him either. She stood up and followed him into the first-class cabin, sitting down where he indicated without a word. There was no point wasting her breath by objecting to his high-handed manner, not when she would need every scrap of breath to put across her reasons for them not being together. She knew Khalid too well to imagine that he would accept her decision without a fight. The thought filled her with dread.
Khalid spoke briefly to the flight attendant then sat down beside her. ‘So why did you run off when you knew that we needed to talk?’
‘I realised that there wasn’t anything else we really needed to say.’ She gave a little shrug. ‘I’d told you about the baby and that was the main thing.’
‘I see. So the fact that we haven’t made any decisions about the future isn’t important?’
His tone was silky, smooth, but Sam shivered when she heard the underlying thread of steel it held as well. Khalid wasn’t going to be fobbed off by half-truths; she would have to be completely honest with him.
‘Of course it’s important but we need to think about the situation and not rush into something we will regret.’
‘And you believe that we will regret making a commitment, regret it if we get married, regret making a life for us and our child?’
It was what she wanted so much but she knew that it could never happen, that the cost was too great. ‘I... Yes.’ Her voice caught but she forced herself to continue. ‘You will regret it, Khalid. I’m certain of that.’
‘You are so wrong, so very wrong, my love.’ He took her hand and raised it to his lips. ‘The only thing I shall ever regret is that I let you go six years ago. I did it with the very best of intentions, because I was afraid of you getting hurt if our relationship became public knowledge, with all the attendant publicity it would have aroused. I was also afraid that you would come to hate me one day for ruining your life.’
‘Ruin my life?’ she repeated, staring at him in surprise. ‘What do you mean by that?’
‘That if we had got married and you had moved to Azad to live, your life would have had to change drastically. Although it’s easier for women these days than it was when my mother lived there, there are still far too many restrictions on what a woman can do.’
He ran the pad of his thumb over her knuckles and Sam trembled when she felt the light caress. It was all she could do not to tell him that it didn’t matter, that she didn’t care how her life would be affected, but she knew that she mustn’t do that, that she had to listen to what he had to say because it was important to him that she understood.
‘What sort of restrictions?’ she asked quietly.
‘You might not have been able to continue with your career in medicine, for a start, although, thankfully, that isn’t such an issue nowadays. There are far more women doctors working in our hospitals and clinics then there used to be.’
‘That’s good,’ she said softly.
‘Yes, it is.’ He smiled at her with such tenderness that her breath caught. ‘Nevertheless, it will be some time before our women doctors achieve the same degree of equality as their male counterparts. Consultants’ posts tend to be offered to men, I’m afraid.’
She gave a tiny shrug. ‘It will happen eventually. And let’s be realistic. Men tend to get boosted up the career ladder far faster than we women even in the UK.’
‘That’s true,’ he agreed, then sighed. ‘However, as the wife of a member of the ruling family, you would be expected to conform to traditional values—home and family first, with your career way down the list of priorities.’
‘I understand. Obviously it would take some getting used to but if, as you say, things are changing then it would only be for a limited period, surely?’
‘Perhaps. But I know from experience the effect it could have. My mother trained as a barrister but she gave up the law when she married my father. It was fine at first but eventually the fact that she couldn’t do the job she loved was too much for her.’ He shrugged. ‘She and my father divorced when I was in my early teens, not because they didn’t love one another but because my mother couldn’t cope with life in Azad any longer.’
‘How sad. It must have been very difficult for you.’ She turned her hand over and squeezed his fingers. ‘I can understand how it must have affected you, Khalid, but just because your mother couldn’t cope with life in Azad, it doesn’t mean that I couldn’t cope with it.’
She took a quick breath, knowing that she had to be as honest as he had been. ‘No, my biggest fear is the damage it could cause to you and your family if people found out about my background. That’s something I couldn’t bear. You said that I might come to hate you for ruining my life but it works two ways. You could come to hate me for tarnishing your family’s reputation.’
‘No. That would never happen.’ His fingers closed around hers, holding her fast when she tried to pull away. ‘I could never hate you, Sam. Never in a thousand years.’ He bent and kissed her, his lips clinging to hers for a mere heartbeat, but she felt the passion they held and shivered. It would be so easy to believe him but she had to be strong and do what was right.
‘You can’t make promises like that, Khalid. Nobody can.’
‘I know how I feel.’ He pressed her hand to his chest so she could feel the steady pounding of his heart. ‘I know that I could never hate you for any reason. I love you too much, just as I shall love this child we have conceived. That’s why I came after you, to make you understand that we need one another.’
‘I don’t need you, though,’ she muttered in a desperate attempt to be sensible.
‘Don’t you?’ He brushed his mouth over hers again then drew back and looked at her. ‘Not even a little bit?’
‘I... No,’ she whispered, trying to stem the shudder that was working its way down her spine.
‘Are you sure?’ His mouth touched hers once more and lingered so that she could both feel and hear the words. It made it that much harder to stick to what she knew was right. ‘Absolutely certain?’
‘Yes,’ Sam whispered, although she could feel her resolve melting and desperately tried to hold on to what little remained.
‘I see.’ He sighed throatily as his hand slid up her arm, caressing her skin through the thin fabric of her blouse. ‘That’s a real shame because I need you. So much. You and our baby. If I’m honest, I can’t imagine how I shall live the rest of my life without you both.’
His hand slid up then down, the light pressure of his fingers making her shudder with need, with longing, with far too many things. When he drew her to him and held her against his chest, Sam tried to be strong, tried her best to remember that she mustn’t allow this to happen, but her resolve seemed to have disappeared completely. When Khalid tilted her chin and kissed her, she didn’t push him away, didn’t even attempt to stop what was happening. How could she when it was what she wanted so desperately?
The kiss seemed to last for an eternity and yet at the same time it was over far too quickly. Sam clung to him afterwards, needing the solid support of his body to hold on to as her determination faded into nothing. She loved him so much and if he wanted her to live with him then she would do so and face whatever the future held.
‘I love you, my darling.’ He st
roked her hair, repeating the words in his own tongue, and she sighed softly.
‘I love you too. So very much. So much that I can’t bear the thought of you getting hurt.’
‘As I can’t bear the thought of you getting hurt either.’ His expression was grave. ‘It isn’t just the unwelcome attentions of the press you would have to contend with, Sam, but the vastly different lifestyle you would lead in Azad. Could you bear it, bear to have restrictions placed upon what you do?’
‘I don’t know,’ she said honestly. ‘All I can do is give it a go and see what happens.’
‘Or I could move to England on a permanent basis.’
‘You’d do that?’ She drew back and looked at him in surprise.
‘Yes.’ He smiled. ‘If it was a choice between that and losing you then I would do it. Willingly too.’
‘I don’t know what to say...’ She broke off and swallowed, unbearably moved by the offer. ‘Thank you so much. I know how you feel about Azad and that you are willing to give up living there for me is more than I could ever hope for.’
‘I’d be doing it for us—you, me and our child.’ He kissed her hand. ‘That would make any sacrifice worthwhile.’
‘I feel the same. Maybe it will be very restricting to conform to Azadian mores but I can handle it so long as I have you.’
He sighed. ‘I hope that’s true. I saw how hard it was for my mother and how frustrated she became at having to adhere to a way of life that was alien to her.’
‘But a lot has changed since then, hasn’t it? And it’s still changing.’
‘That’s very true.’ He smiled. ‘Maybe we can help to make those changes happen sooner than they might have done. You will soon charm my fellow countrymen, the way you have charmed me!’
‘I doubt that,’ she denied, laughing up at him. She sobered abruptly. ‘The press will have a field day once the news of our relationship gets out. Are you sure it won’t upset you, Khalid?’
One More Night with Her Desert Prince... Page 15