3rd World Products, Book 16

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3rd World Products, Book 16 Page 28

by Ed Howdershelt


  “Thing of it is,” he continued, “I never did see exactly what she did to ‘em. I started out the door with my gun and all of a sudden they were just on the ground. What is it she used to do, anyway? Some kind of cop?”

  “What did she tell you?”

  He shook his head. “I never got a chance to ask her. Haven’t even seen her since the accident.”

  “Then I’d probably be talking out of class to say anything about what she used to do. But you’re right. Some kind of cop.”

  Glancing over his shoulder toward the NIA car, he asked, “Are you with the NIA, too? I have to run this place and look after it. Is there something going on I ought to know about?”

  “Nope. I’m not with the NIA, CIA, FBI, or anything else. But I’d prob’ly have to say that anyway, wouldn’t I?”

  I grinned to make it seem like a joke, but he took it as I’d intended. Stepping back a pace, he forced a chuckle and said, “Yeah, I guess you probably would. Well, okay, I just wanted to check and see everything’s okay here. G’night.”

  Tanya’s chuckle was real. She said she was about to see her mom and that she’d be home soon.

  It was only about seven. Nothing on TV. I prowled the apartment and found only some steamy-looking romance books on a few shelves. Tanya’s music collection seemed to be about half-eighties and nineties hits and half country. I wondered if she’d enjoy the clubs Toni and I used to frequent.

  Thinking of Toni made me wonder what she was up to these days. I sent a ping to her datapad and it logged the call, but she didn’t answer. Probably out. She didn’t haul her pad around.

  I turned on the TV anyway and found a show called ‘Cash Cab‘. It was a standard trivia-questions-for-money format moved into a taxi in the streets of New York. Sipping coffee, I sat through two half-hour segments before Tanya got home.

  She saw what I was watching and said, “I like that show. How many did you miss?”

  After our kiss, I said, “One. About a basketball team.”

  “Just one? Wow. Hey, didn’t I say something about you being naked when I got here? Come on.”

  I followed her to the bedroom and watched her strip as I took off my own clothes. After another kiss, she grinningly slipped away and headed for the kitchen. Taking a chair, I watched her move about and noted where she put the things that didn’t require refrigeration.

  Once everything was stashed, she retrieved a tray of ice, took the nearly-empty pint gin bottle down and set it with the much larger bottle she’d bought, and then opened a bitter lemon bottle and mixed me a drink.

  “Taste it. Did I get it right?”

  I nodded. “Just right.”

  “Good.”

  Tanya turned back to the counter to mix her own drink and I noticed her glancing at me in the reflection from her stainless steel toaster. I pretended not to have noticed and continued ogling her backside. That had an effect on me, of course, and it stood jutting upward eagerly when she turned around.

  She wordlessly pulled up a chair, sat down facing me, and reached into my lap as she sipped her drink. After some moments of fondling me, she suddenly seemed to realize something and stood up to go get her backpack. From it she pulled a package.

  “It’s a shower curtain,” she said, “For the back door. I didn’t want to take the time to shop for a real curtain and I still have the old curtain rod in a closet.”

  A few minutes later there was an opaque blue curtain across the back door. I reached up to fasten the left side of the curtain rod and Tanya reached for my dick as she sipped her drink. She pronounced the curtain adequate and led me back to the table, where she pretended to only then discover I’d been slickly dampening her fingers while she fondled me.

  Taking a seat in front of me, she took me in her mouth and played for a while, eventually announcing with a big grin that the leakage problem had been solved for the moment. I sat down and watched as she made another drink and noted that the leakage problem hadn’t really been solved at all.

  This time Tanya came to straddle my knees as she stood before me, set her drink on the table, and said, “Your turn,” as she gracefully pointed an index finger at her bush.

  Suits me. You bet. I leaned forward a bit and nibbled for a time until her knees wobbled and she groaningly lowered herself into my lap and onto me. Sliding all the way to the bottom with no resistance at all made her groan again and Tanya draped her arms over my shoulders as we kissed.

  Turning her head to one side a bit, she rested her forehead on my left shoulder and whispered, “Gawd, I’ve missed this.”

  After a flurry of little kisses on my neck and face, she sat straight and reached for her drink, taking care not to let the condensation dribble on us.

  The entire scene, especially leading me by the dick and pointing at her bush, reminded me of things Selena had often done. Toni had picked them up from her, at first mimicking playfully and later doing those things as a matter of course in our lovemaking. Others had done those things, as well, but usually only after some time together.

  Tanya’s efforts had raised a light sheen of sweat on her shoulders. I leaned forward and let the scent of her fill my head, then licked her shoulder and kissed the spot. Tanya giggled.

  “When you licked me, your dick jumped inside me.”

  Interesting. Selena and Toni had said the same thing.

  “You taste good, ma’am.”

  “I guess I must. Do it again.”

  I sniffed and licked her other shoulder and she giggled again. “It seems to work every time.”

  ‘It seems to work every time’. Again, a similar statement.

  Sitting back a bit, Tanya looked at me and said, “You’ve been very quiet, Ed.”

  “Been thinking, ma’am.” Gauging her possible reactions, I decided to ask anyway and put up a screen to my right with Toni’s face on display. “Ever seen her before?”

  Tanya froze and stared in shock, then stared at me as she asked, “That’s the ‘Toni’ you were talking about?!”

  I nodded. “Yup.”

  “But she’s a lesbian!”

  “Not altogether true, ma’am. And she may be calling me back in a while.”

  “Calling you back?!”

  “Yup. I tried to reach her earlier. She didn’t answer, but her pad logged the call.”

  “Her what?”

  “Her datapad. It’s what we used before field screens.”

  Tanya stood up so fast my dick made a popping noise as it left her and slapped my belly. “She’s calling here?!”

  Okay, this kind of silly shit could go on for quite a while if I didn’t settle things down.

  I asked, “What’s the problem? She’s an old friend of mine. Something reminded me of her earlier and I called her. Maybe she’ll call back, maybe not. Depends on what she’s doing, I guess. And if she’s home this week.”

  “What reminded you of her?”

  I thumbed at the corner of her living room and said, “Your music collection. I wondered if you’d enjoy the clubs in Gainesville. Thinking about them brought Toni to mind. We used to hit the Windmill together.”

  Tanya’s face fell open. “That’s where I’ve seen you! Two years ago! You were the only man in the club!”

  “Nope. The bartender was a guy.”

  She waved a dismissal. “He was working. You came in with eight women besides Toni. What was that about?”

  “We ran into some ladies I knew outside. They have a lawn care business near the college. Let’s get back to why this is all such big news to you. Is there a problem?”

  Chapter Twenty-five

  Watching her reactions, at least one possible problem occurred to me. Her hubby Martin had been alive back then and she’d been at a lesbian bar in Gainesville. How much did I want to know about how that came to be?

  No automatic conclusions; sometimes straight women — especially married ones — hit the gay bars in packs for birthday parties and such. They feel more comfortable in places where m
ale barflies won’t hit on them and if hubby finds out where they partied, he won’t get too worried.

  On the other hand, Tanya seemed to know Toni at least on sight and possibly personally. Since Toni’s taste in women was much like mine, it seemed likely she’d made a pass at Tanya. Had it been a successful pass?

  I repeated, “Is there a problem, Tanya? There shouldn’t be. Toni and Selena and I shared a condo for a while. We played together for years, so if you’ve played with Toni, too, it wouldn’t exactly come as a big shock to me.”

  Eyeing me as if seeing a Martian, Tanya nonetheless managed to say, “Uh… no, I guess it wouldn’t.” After fidgeting for a moment, she came back to the table, scooped up her drink, and slugged most of it down in a couple of gulps.

  Tanya’s gaze was somewhere else entirely for a time as she stood holding her glass in front of me. My touching her hip made her startle. I caressed her thigh, then leaned forward to kiss it. As I straightened, I saw she’d watched me with a level of wariness.

  This was annoying. I stood up and embraced her. Kissed her lightly. She was tense. I rubbed her shoulders, then let my hands fall away and picked up my drink. Sipping it, I regarded her thoughtfully for a time, which seemed to annoy her.

  She asked, “What?”

  “Just wondering.”

  Tanya almost snapped at me, “Wondering what? Whether I slept with Toni?”

  “Nope. I’m wondering why it’s such a big deal to you. I slept with her too. And Selena. And sometimes I was smack in the middle of it all, so whether you slept with her isn’t really a very meaningful issue, is it?”

  “Not to you, maybe. To me it is. Was.” She sighed, “Is. Damn.”

  I shrugged and said, “Well, it’s obviously bugging the hell out of you, so explain. We have all night.”

  Sipping the last of her drink, Tanya seemed to consider things for a time, then she looked at her glass and said, “Sure. Why not? Let me get a refill.”

  She turned to the sink, set her glass down, picked up the bourbon bottle, and then turned back to me. “Wait. You said you were ‘smack in the middle of it’. What does that mean?”

  “Many things. It depended on which woman was in front of me at the time. Both loved to be nibbled. One loved to have her breasts fondled and sucked. The other, not so much. She was into long kisses and stroking. One loved to have me come in her mouth. The other loved playing with my dick, but she gagged on the stuff and never let it happen again after the first time. She’d frantically wave for the other one to take over when she knew I was close. I was their tool, their toy, and their friend. We had good times until life after college split us up.”

  “Life after college?”

  “Sel got a really good job and had to move. Toni and I looked after the condo until it sold, but Toni’s more into girls and we’ve sort of drifted apart the last few years. We’d get together a few times a year, but that’s all. And the last time I got the impression she felt like she was cheating on her girlfriend, even though her girlfriend knew we’d be together that weekend.”

  “Why wasn’t her girlfriend with you?”

  “Holiday stuff. Family stuff.”

  “Maybe she never found out.”

  I shook my head. “Nope. She knew ‘cuz she specifically told me to do whatever we used to do together. Bonnie hated leaving Toni at home that weekend. Then she kissed me, and it wasn’t a peck on the cheek. You have to realize; Bonnie’d never kissed me before. Never in any manner. She grinned and patted the front of my jeans and told me to keep her Toni warm.”

  With a shrug, I said, “She didn’t consider me a threat. A toy, maybe, and a friend, yes, but definitely not a threat.”

  “Is Toni still with her?”

  “As of last month, yeah.”

  “Last month?! I thought we were talking a year or two.”

  “Don’t know why. I never said that. Toni had a problem with her hot tub. I fixed it. We all spent the afternoon lounging around with beer and pizza.”

  Tanya studied me for a moment, then turned to the counter and began assembling her drink. I noticed my drink was nearly gone and stood up to fix a new one. Tanya glanced at me a few times, but said nothing until she’d sipped her new drink.

  Sitting down, she said, “Ed, something’s bothering me.”

  I looked her up and down and said, “Well, you’re not sitting on your cell phone, so it must be something else.”

  “Funny. You just told me a couple of things in passing that I might not have told anyone ever.”

  “For instance?”

  “Like that one of the women loved having you… I couldn’t believe you said that.”

  “I didn’t tell you which one and it was in context with the explanation. You asked, I answered.”

  “Is this how you’ll talk about me someday?”

  Moving to stand by her chair, I said, “Probably, but I won’t name names. Never do.”

  Rolling her eyes, Tanya said, “Well, I know it was either Selena or Toni, don’t I?”

  “But not which, and you never will unless Toni tells you. Which I doubt she will unless the two of you are taking turns with it.”

  Tanya had been sipping when I’d said that. She coughed and a light spray of bourbon hit my dick. I tore off a couple of paper towels and handed her one, then used the other on myself.

  When she’d stopped choking, I said, “In other words, the topic wouldn’t come up without good reason.”

  With an ‘are you nuts?‘ expression, Tanya asked, “You thought you had a good reason for telling me that a minute ago?”

  “Oh, you bet, ma’am. Ever since I first mentioned Toni, I’ve had the distinct impression things were right on the edge. Like I might get dumped instantly if I said the wrong thing. I don’t know what spooked you or why, but at times like this I just tell it like it is. Or was, anyway. You asked what being in the middle meant and I answered as best I could.”

  And, as ever, if you speak of the devil, you’ll get an answer. I received a ping from Toni’s pad. Putting up a screen, I kept it aimed only at my face and shoulders as I said, “Hi, Toni. I was just thinking about you earlier.”

  She grinned and pretended to peek beyond the bottom of the screen as she asked, “Is that why you’re naked?”

  “Well, no, ma’am. Sorry. I have company and I was wondering if you still hit the clubs. Is the Windmill still a good place?”

  She quipped, “Only if you like lesbians,” then rolled her eyes and sighingly added, “And you do, so that could have been a lot funnier with someone else.”

  “Yes’m, I suppose so. But that’s all right. I got your meaning. Still no rap crap?”

  Toni shook her head. “No rap. The owner won’t allow it. You remember Anita?”

  “Big, always smiling, you never knew if she was glad to see you or thinking of where to hide the body?”

  Toni laughed, “Yeah, that’s her. She bought the place. She liked you, Ed. Everybody thought that was pretty damned weird.”

  Tanya stood up behind the screen as I said, “Well, there’s no accounting for taste, ma’am.”

  Seeing a reverse image of Tanya’s face made Toni’s eyes get big, then squint thoughtfully.

  She said, “I know you. Tawney, is it?”

  Tanya said, “You’re close. It’s Tanya.”

  Snapping her fingers, Toni said, “Now I remember. Your old man was sick. How’s he doing?”

  Rather lamely, Tanya replied, “Uh… He’s dead.”

  Looking somewhat stricken, Toni said in a softer voice, “Aw, jeez. Talk about putting your foot in it. I’m sorry, Tanya. Ed, help me out here, will ya?”

  I shrugged. “Okay. He’s been dead for a year and she’s been happily using me without mercy for two days, so it can’t be all that sensitive an issue. Feeling better yet?”

  “Maybe, if she’s really using you without mercy.”

  “Yup. Like you used to, ma’am. Way back when.”

  “Last month is way ba
ck when?”

  “Hey, it feels like way back when to me. You almost ruined me, sweetie. I thought I’d never find another bedroom goddess like you until Tanya came along and saved me.”

  Tanya snickered and sipped her drink.

  Rolling her eyes, Toni said to Tanya, “See? That’s how he is. Talking to two women, he’ll find a way to compliment both of them in the same breath. And make them laugh about it.” Looking at me, she snapped, “And don’t call me ‘sweetie’. It makes me feel all cute and cuddly and I’m supposed to be a dyke.”

  “Oh, yes, ma’am. As you command, ma’am. I done forgot myself and got carried away.”

  From somewhere beyond her bedroom, a woman called, “Toni? Did you get him?”

  Toni called back, “Yeah! He ran into somebody we know, Bon. Well, sort of, anyway.”

  Bonnie entered the room in a bikini, toweling her hair as she asked, “He ran into somebody? On his bike?” She took a moment to wave and said, “Hi, Ed! You okay?” as she approached.

  I said, “It wasn’t a wreck and I’m fine. You seem pretty fine, too, ma’am. Wearing suits in the hot tub now?”

  Bonnie said, “We had friends over this afternoon. Some of them are a little shy.” She grinned and added, “Why? Do you want me to take it off?”

  I laughed, “Yes, please?”

  Thumbing at Toni, she instantly replied, “Sorry. Her eyes only. Who’s your friend?”

  Tanya said, “I’m Tanya. I remember you. You kept me from falling on the stairs at the club.”

  That seemed to spark Bonnie’s memory. “That was you? Gawd, girl, you were wasted!”

  “Oh, please don’t remind me. I remember too much of that night as it is. Someone threw up on my shoes.”

  Bonnie said, “It was that skinny blonde. She was doing fine, running her face like crazy, then all of a sudden she started spewing. Everybody scattered like rats in a feed bin.”

  “Uh… what?”

  “When you open the door, the rats run like hell.”

  “Oh. Yeah, I guess they would. That was Jessica. She… she was on medication.”

  Bonnie laughed, “Medication?! Bullshit. She was speeding and drinking white wine. That’s some bad chemistry.”

 

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